₦airaland Forum

Seun..

Sorry to jump in on the train a bit late.. but for some of us [I may not fall into this bracket, but I'm sure a lot of my brethren and sistren fall into this bracket] 3000 naira per annum may appear on the steep side.. we all appreciate the effort that goes into operating and maintaining a site of this magnitude, but has any thot gone into staggered membership fees?.. maybe something less for the less privledges.. [albeit with less features..].. some of us can barely find enough money to go to the cyber centers to "browze", talkless of subscribing to some top of the line, highly desired websites and discussion groups which may be the high point of our most highly stressed-out days..

Bottom line.. not all of us can afford $50, like some of our contributers above...

.. we stared out from Lagos, on an over-night bus to Aba.. our final destination was a monestary on the Mambilla plateau.. on getting to benin, the bus driver informed us that he would be going through warri.. due to the poor state of the road between Onitsha and Aba..

So, we progressed on our journey.. On arrival at Warri.. the unexpected happened.. the bus broke down...

I can see you ladies don't trust men 1 inch.. I wonder how many of you are currently in relationships, seeing ur misgivings on men..

If the men u are with "don't love you", then what's the point being in a relationship with them in the first instance..

Or are all of u single ...

really ! ! !

... cut the call, pretending it was my stock broker... Funke, as she later told me her name was, looked at me whimsically, and told me to stop lying.. that she knew it was a lady.. I protested my innocence, saying that although it was a lady, that my stockbroker was female... [lies, lies, lies..].. finally she let up on the subject.. we continued having our meal, and by the time we finished, it was quite late.. I offered to drop her at home in my jallopy, but she told me she came with a car, and asked me to walk her to it.. On getting there I saw it was a BMW X5 jeep... [wahalla...]...

But novels and movies are not reality... 

Chelsea   

... took 7 bottles of star beer, went to sleep, resolved to make the best of it the next day..  in the morning (early in the morning), I took the next available means of transportation.. can't remember if I hired a plane or chartered a taxi.. but by the time I got to the wedding venue, I spied a large crowd.. lo and behold, before my very eyes, was ThankGod and Rasheeda.. Strutting like as if they owned the world.. apparently, I had just missed the part where she gave him the wine [the wine carrying part of the ceremony..] my heart broke.... 

So... should the individual go 'scot-free'  

therapeutic [hope I got this right, someone pls let me know.. ]

I was just refering to general advice for newly-weds to keep happiness in the home... I'll have to obtain permission before I can release further information... [u know in these days of copy-right and privacy laws, one needs to confirm the boundaries, lest one get sued... 

... in appreciation of what he had done for her, she invited him to a local 'buka' for some isi-ewu and nkwobi... they both arrived at the appointed time, she with some friends of hers.. he alone.. and she found out that he wasn't all the 'area-boy' that he initally appeared to be... they all got talking, and she found that he was a kind and sensitive man, with an alarming command of the english language.. all attempts by her to probe deeper were met with intense resistance... her friends were at loss to the degree of 'chemistry' that was unfolding before their very eyes...

Any words of wisdom for the couple

4 Babadudu:

Bro...

Right to be treated like a woman or right to be treated as a lady or right to be treated as a human being

What comes round goes round, if we want respect we have to give respect...

It's not a right, it's a privilege...

I just had a conversation with a female friend of mine... [she's married...]

Apparently there was an issue between them which they just sorted out, and she made the observation to her hubby that whenever they had a falling-out or arguement [let me not say quarrel], he refuses eat her food.. with things going to the point of her now even asking him whether or not he wants to be served food at meal times whenever there are un-sorted issues, lest the food go to waste...

Anyhow, this was the content of my response to her...

"u women never learn... a man needs peace in his home.. he needs to feel like he's king.. like the 'Champion' of all spark plugs.. like he's the Lord and Master of his own Personal domain.. he doesn't need to fight battles outside, and come home and the war continues.. he knows that sometimes he's wrong.. but even at that he doesnt need it rubbed in his face.. when one small church-rat of a Arrow now provides that level of comfort outside, u women will now scream bloody murder.. forgetting that u were the ones who started the war in the first place.. "

Well.. suffice for it to be said that she obviously didn't agree with me.. and seeks another opinion.. So I throw this to all the learned ones in the house... to our fora of "Elders"... to the "Alagbas"

What do you feel

I'm curious...

For the ladies in the house...

Why the hell ... Why would you want to slap your lover anyway 

O.T...

From which planet are u? .. where 'LOVE' is the sole premise of women folk..

We men are human too.. We live, breathe, shyte, and feel pain as well.. 

Men are most capable of showing love.. 

Maybe it's all tied to ur definition of love.. or ur prefered manifestation of it...

So tell me.. how would you like to be shown 'love'... 

I guess it's all a matter of mindset, and what the intention was when he got married..

If it was for companionship, then I guess there would be no problem in waiting for the Lord to bestow His Grace..

But if the intention was procreation, then one may see why the urgency may be there.. especially if one doesn't feel that there's anything physically, spiritually or medically wrong with both parties..

Take the case of a man who while having numerous affairs and flings prior to getting married, gets a girl pregnant.. He obviously knows he's capable of reproducing.. if upon marrige his spouse doesn't concieve within reasonable period, he's going to start getting suspiscious, knowing that he's been up to the task before now..

Suffice it to say that "a few good men" still exist in this world.. and that women shouldn't always stereotype and feel that men are incapable of exercising that fundamental concept called "love" or exercising patience and due discretion when due...

To quote old-time cliches from some well known singers and artistes:

"What's love age got to with it??"

"Age is nothing but a number..." 

Truthfully, as long as both parties are:
1. Physically compatible...
2. Emotionally compatible...
3. Spiritually compatible...
and
4. Sexually compatible...

that's all that matters... at the end of the day, in every relationship, it's love and mutual respect that keeps it going... a lack of either or both can be a sure recipe for disaster in the affair... As long as both parties know their various roles in the relationship, and no one is taken for granted or disrespected for no reason, I can't really see the problem...

And besides, older women have one up on the younger folk, aside from obviously being more experienced in the ways of the world  and knowing how to "treat" their man.. they have a broader outlook on life [either from being more matured or experienced in life, or both.. ]... they tend to look on the simple things of life that keep a relationship happy... and are less prone to fits of "drama"... especially regarding the trivial and mundane..

This is really a funny topic...

No one so far has bothered to ask what the motivation for the initial assult was.. whether it was by provocation or unwarranted.. [because we all know say women-them all get hot tempers...]

Suffice it to say that in all of this, we're just being typical Nigerians by looking for the cure and not the cause...

That having been said, the truth is that if a man raises his hand to a woman, he would most likely cause permanent damage, to talk less of maybe actually taking a life..

As a man, there is no other option but to walk away... Does one want murder on one's hands? Whether due to provocation or not?

Quote from Adetola: But sometimes it is good that you hear her out, you might just be the one at fault.

In reply to this, how is it one's fault when one's sweeter half cheats?  I don't get the logic.  Are you insinuating that she was driven to cheat in one's absence?  Please explain yourself, since I don't want to be pre-emptive here and accuse you of not knowing what the hell you are talking about..

To remain in a rational state of mind, let's suffice it to say that if and when you have a similar experience in the first person, then you'll know where someone is coming from. 

PS: [s]It doesn't matter if Seun is in a relationship or not.[/s]  There's no justification for rape, and cheating and rape are not even in the same universe, talkless of hemisphere.

Do we really need to answer this topic?

For those that are single, let them tell me how it feels when years down the line they have marital problems because one stupid charlatan (male or female) refuses to leave their spouse alone.

And for those who are married, when the **** hits the fan, I hope they'll be around to enjoy the repercussions and ramifications of their actions..

There's no justification, period. If you want to go that route, why get married?

People.. People...

A word for the wise..

If the guy in question feels that he's missing something from the relationship, which drives him to seek satisfaction from another babe... And if the girl in the relationship can not accept or condone sharing her guy with another babe.. then I believe "Q.E.D".. [for those of us that aren't specialists in latin... "the proof is complete..."]

There is no point in using the proverbial "after-death medicine"... there is no point in resussitation the dead... they should both go their own ways, if they haven't done so already..

In life, guys will always be guys, and dogs will always be dogs.. Essentially, guys and gals are built in different ways.. both physically, mentally, and espeically emotionally.. there are certain things a guy will do which has no impact or import on his feelings for a loved one.. that's why guys can keep multiple relationships without confusing or conflicting feelings or emotions.. Gals who understand this lead peaceful and emotionally fulfilled lives.. those that don't do so to their own peril..

For the contributer that feels that once a man has this habit or tendency, it would inevitably carry over to his matrimonial home, I have just one comment for the person.. Stereotyping in a dangerous fad... the fact that some people indulge in certain tendencies does not make it the norm.. many "retired" playboys and playgals end up having very stable and cherished marital lives.. Staying married to a ripe old age without agroos...

What do you do when you find out that your girlfriend (or someone that you intend to marry) has had sex with two different men while you were not around (or out of the country?).

And keeps "h-mute" about it - not confirming or denying it - even when confronted with the cold hard facts.

Is revenge or retribution the best option?

All we hear about are tall guys[i][men][/i] and shorter babes[i][girls][/i]. What of tall babes and shorter guys?

If I must state my piece here, I must confess that I've dated and tasted all manners of babes, though not at the same time. Tall, short, fat, lekpa, the list is endless. (I don't want to sound like a dog here).

If the truth be said, it's all in the person. That is what matters in a relationship. Personally, I find tall babes delightful, but not without their own intricacies (they require certain techniques.. ). But this is not to say that short babes have been found wanting in that department either. I guess what I'm just trying to say is that height, like age, is nothing but a number.

With regards to equipment or packages, if the truth be said, it's not a case of what you have, but how you use it.. and I'm sure all the ladies will bear me witness (someone testify!)..

I'm in the "intermediate" height bracket (5ft 10in.) so it's not a case of being tall or short. If you no send the person, u no go send the person, period. Whether na Arnold Schwazennegger or Danny DaVito type im be.