₦airaland Forum

See all these fuckards in here running their stink asses on Jamaicans, NO I am NOT Jamaican, and NOT too fond of the majority of them either. However, just like there are fraudulent Nigerians, so too there are bad Jamaicans, CAse closed, And for those who thinks I will be back to tarry, kiss the part of my body where the sun doesnt shine,

olanajim:
CodeRED,
I don't want to believe that men must continues to lie to women just to impress them. You are reasonable in the sense that you didn't generalise. Most ladies that are hurt would blame all men. Like the poster, the believe that once a man is bad, all men are bad. They therefore stop trusting men and treat responsible men like shit.

When a determined man come, he would study the lady, and the "adjust" to what she want. Before you say "bingo", she is in love again. Inevitably, she would be disappointed. Then the cycle would repeat itself.

Stereotyping lead to nothing but disappointment. It also blindfold the carrier and prevent him or her from seeing the real men.

Seun was right. Ladies fail to understand that real men don't stoop so low as to impress ladies by lying, knowing fully well that she would eventually find out.

My advice to ladies is to start looking beyond "words" and "appearances". Any lady that is easily sway by words, and glamour is sending application letter to disappointment. It takes time to know human being. Love shouldn't be a 5 minutes attraction.

Well the truth is I was NEVER like this. However, last night I had a very long convo with a fellow-Ndler and he made me see and understand a lot of things about men that I never saw. I then used my own bad experience and came to the conclusion that ALL men arent bad.

One of the biggest mistakes we make as ladies, is trying to change men. The truth is we can't. They have to change for themselves. I was once one of those ladies who vowed I would NEVER get involved again. But then I woke up and realise making such a decision is like giving victory to a goat who never deserved me in the first instance.

I will Love again. I am not giving up on men so easily. I have 8 brothers and tons of nephews and I wont want ladies giving up on them either. ladies just need to be more careful with their choices. AS the saying goes " all that glitters isnt gold" And if he sounds too good to be true, trust your gut feelings. He might just be,

To all the ladies who have been cheated on, abused, maginalised et al, it's ok. If at first you dont succeed, just pick yourself up and try again. Who knows, next time may be better

olanajim:
They keep falling for the wrong persons and then blame the whole world for their stupidity.

I agree with you somewhat, however, I dont think it has anything to do with stupidity. MOST men are NOT truthful when they approach a lady. They will pretend to be someone they arent. Thank God some of us find out early and leave before any significant damage is done. Unfortunately for most ladies, it's too late.

I have my fair share of "goats"( 2 to be exact ), but I wont bash ALL men. I know there are great guys still available. I know ALL men arent dogs. I know ALL men dont lie. I know ALL men dont cheat.

Instead of chastising the ladies who have not been so lucky, why not empathise with them?

My motto where love is concerned is simply that " sometimes we have to kiss a few toads, before our Prince comes along"

@poster,
RUN, Any man who abuses a woman ( verbally, physically, pyschologically or else) is NOT worth your time. I know it's easier said than done, but you have to value yourself more. The truth is they will NEVER change. Look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself if you deserve to be someone's garbage bin? To make matters worse you have children. Your kids dont deserve to grow up around this animal. Kids practise what they see. Your daughter would most likely end up with an abusive man too, and you son would follow the goat's footstep and become an abuser as well.

You have to know what you want for yourself and you children. All the best!

zerocool:


@CodeRed

Strongly believe you've not been played before, uh?

What do you know? I am sure, somewhere out there is one delusional loser thinking he may have played me. But I love that, when they think they are playing, it's the other way around. Nothing gives me pleasure more than seeing them dance in their misery and uncertainty. As they say "wat u dont know wont hurt u" LOL

And the saga continues in the wonderful world of "politricks". Mc cain has done exactly what I expected, use a female as his scapegoat to get into the White House. I pray everyone is taking note. This man has no good intention. He should be making plans to retire in some upscale Nursing home, instead he is causing wahala.

All the same, he wont succeed. Obama is a man of Principles, and it has now been established, thanks to that desperate move, that Mc Cain has none.

@topic
This is "our" weekend and YES I do have plans.
Tomorrow night boat-ride up n down the Hudson.
After party, Machel & Xtatix, Rupie, Bomani and crew,
Sunday night(round de clock) at the #1 spot to be, P's backyard
Monday on the Parkway representing Green, Blue an Yellow , It's gonna be fun-galore

Yongeze:
self proclaimed players are usually the guys who have to settle for the ugly fat chicks, no wonder they dump them all the time.

ROFL.

Couldnt have said it better. Bunch of nitwits claiming to be playas when in truth the ONLY things they play with are their "dicks" "video games" and "dominoes"

@J-Girl,
Why you didnt alert me that "Al and Peggy Bundy" were out roaming again? I always miss the "good" times on Nairaland, I hate books oo

Hannibal:
Consumate what??
[b]I am confident ma seeds would swim backwards to where they spurted from instead of swimming upstream. [/b]With all the farticles in DeepZone's system?? ?? Even Mike Tyson will find it hard to keep an erection.

I swear, that even Zing is here purring his fine ass off, , Now I rest my case ooo. I have tired joo,

DeepZone:
Tell him to prove it to the nairaland audience and if his peewee is longer than 1 inch, I'll pay $1000 to the house. Pataki too can play but i'm putting his own at 1/2 inch. I bet ya!!!

Girl don't be fooled oo. 1inch? God forbid. No way, He can give Long John Silver a run for his money joo


@Pataki, Which madam ah call? You see what happens when you let these men go away for school? All of a sudden they throw out Mama and Daddy's principles.

Hannibal:
Seriously, don't make DeepZone's head swell for the fun of it.
She is suffering from PSAS(permanent sexual arousal syndrome).
Words like these make her reach orgasm at the speed of light!!!

P.S. Is there a way i can pull out of this arrangement. . . . .I think SLY deserves DeepZone.
SLY's nostrils are insensitive. . . .He cannot smell anything even if it's DeepZone's shit so no hazards!!!

It was never my intention to make Her head swell dear. I have something else in mind that I want to swell . So make sure you consumate the marriage the same day o. I want god children

j-girl:
You welcome sweets.
I might chat with you on IM, it depends on my studying . I have a feeling this wedding will be the best wedding in Nairaland and it WILL come to pass.   No matter what they both say.

Yes dear, you know how to reach me. I am hitting the books later too. I have to be in the Lab at 7.40am
As per the wedding thingy. I have already called up my personal shopper. You know your girl Codey goes all out when it comes to dressing up or down

Hannibal:
@ CodeRED,

What are we doing to protect the guests from Deepzone's putrescent farts??
MANSLAUGHTERING is on the cards if we don't protect the guests.

You know how the Island girl roll now. Trust me, when i am done organising this wedding, what Tom and katie had could NEVER come close. This wedding will be on the cover of "Vogue", "Rollingstone" " Cosmopolitan" "O" "People. Man I am telling you, You guys have no idea how blessed you two are. Finding Love on NL. Seun should charge y'all dread

DeepZone:
Roflmao, CodeRed go kill me today. Is it as in Hung hung down south or he's like William Hung?

No WAy love.  I am telling you sistren. What Hanni packs will make your womb go "zoom zoom zoom" The guy is just BLESSED ,


@Pataki,
You better start respecting Mrs. Hannideep now. Remember you are still gonna want to go hang-out at the Boss man's house. And Madam Hannideep would be the one preparing the joloff, stew and egusi. So you better be nice, or else

@Deepzone, Hannibal, J-girl, Pataki and Queenisha,
Thanks guys for helping me release some stress tonight. Come tomorrow I am  back in the "penitentiary"   ,


@Hannibal,
You noticed I placed the "playas" at the top of the list? I am hoping their will be get the fresh dose of "Holy Ghost Fire", as they enter the church, thus drastically making a turn for the better

DeepZone:
@CodeRed,
Why not start the wedding planning from getting a penile pump for hannibal?

Naaa. Hannibal dont need that oo. He is well hung . My sister, don't play with this opportunity oo. Take it now. abeg.

Hannibal:
@ CodeRED,

Is it possible one gets a coochie transplant for DeepZone??

Leave the "dirty" syntax for in the bedroom joo

J-girl darling, here is the list of Groomsmen

1. Pataki

2. Eldee

3. Sly

4. TBK

5. Okija Juju

6. Loyika

7. A-40

8. Lordimpaq

and Best man would definitely have to be Rickyjen

lard wat ah bashment dis ginne be oo

Queenisha:
na deepni I wan be godmother for.
We can even make the name sweeter add a few letters and it becomes a little trendier
what say ye about Deepnisha
How about[i] Deepnishameka[/i]
Deeptina nko?

I mean, she can still be deepni for short

Girl how did you know that's going to be my favourite too? I am also loving Deepnishameka, but wait, are you sure she would be able to spell that name before it's time to remove her name-card? ehrmmm, I once had a child in my class, who still couldnt spell her at Standard 4. The damn name was too long dread

j-girl:
God-mama to who?
Girl, we gotta do it big.
We need so much to plan for this big wedding of the century.
I want to  be Hannizo's God-mother though. That child will need a lot of help when dealing with his/her parents' squabble.

Deepzone, hold on to Hannibal very well. If you need to visit Okija_juju, I have the connections and you get discount too.
Don't let him out of your sight. We can't afford him going back to Hanniwater o!

Darling, I am on the ph with Vera Wang, as we speak. This wedding will go down in the Guiness Book of Records, cha.

erhmmm

I have a tentative list for the bridal party, feel free to submit yours.

BRIDEMAIDS

1. J- Girl

2. Queenisha

3. Razor

4. Cristalz

5. TROoe

6. Chiogo

7. Ibakye

8. Oniyne

and of course I will do the honours of Maid of Honor

I am working on the Groomsmen

DeepZone:
Lol, I'll rather marry Gary Coleman or aki and pawpaw. Stop saying this before Celestine Babayaro, my boo use our bodyguards against Hannibal. Oil and water can never mix. Hannibal is a champion at the red light zone. pataki is also a regular just that he only bargains for those prostitutes on sale. Cheapskate!!!

Naaaaaaaaaa.  Trust me when I say, those dwafts have NOTHING on Hannibal. So girlfriend, you better grab him now before the 'man snatchers" on NL beat you to it darling

Queenisha:
I thought they were Mr & Mrs Hannideep

, I am reconsidering oo. Coming to think of it, Hannideep sounds more like it.

Baby#1. Hannizo

#2. Zonebal

#3. Deepni

#4. Nibalzo , I want to be God-momma ooo

@Mr. & Mrs Hannizone

I went out shopping today for my wedding attire. Just drop the invitation here, and i will glady accept.

j-girl:
I have told you many times, sweetie. We gotta ditch our decent ways and become strippers to get the good men.
The poster is so right. Caramel 'n' Chocolate have to show them girls how it's done.

, I am with you 101%. If they wont appreciate us as good girls, then might as well we go bad dread. . As Rhianna said , "once a good girl goes bad, we're gone forever"

Okija_juju:
Rofl

Juju fit fade but this other one, never fades.

LOLOLOLOL.ROFLMSFAO . okay oo, So wat ah gwarn brethren. And how is business?

Hannibal:
Ma hands are squeaky clean!!!

Make sure it's not ONLY your hands, but your feet, head, tongue, fingers, elbows,

Okija_juju:
@ Topic

I don't doubt it at all.

There is a saying that;

"The way to a mans heart is through his stomach" but "the way to keep a man is through his Dick".

LOL, I thought that would have read " the way to keep a man is through Juju'?

Pataki:
Girl, I have been busy with stuffs. . . . . I am just getting a little breather these days.

That's nice to know.  Take your time, remember the end shall  justify the means dread. . Holla whenever you can o.

Hannibal:
Project?? Nah.
I ain't writing any thesis on whores. . . . . .I just try to know why women choose the profession as a way of living.
It's kind of weird.

Ok o. If you say so. However, I am asking Olga and TT to keep a close eye on your ass.   . EVen your trips to the loo would be closely monitored

Pataki:
@ Hannibal,

Prostitution is a legal job. I thought you knew that. You should come around sometime soon and donate some Euros to the tax system here. Just might get lucky to get a good wifey than those west endz babez.

@ CodeRED,

It ain't my fault. Just staying updated to the rules.

Hmmmmmmmmm. I see, I see. BTW, wey de hell yo bin?

@topic
What's all the fuss about prostitution though? They say " Whoring is a woman's trade, and a Man's comfort" Someone has got to pay the bills oo.

Hannibal:
I try me best to understand the world around me.
No knowledge is lost.

Ok o. Nothing is wrong with "finding out" about the world around you. Knowledge is power. , So tell me, you are curiously soliciting information on prostitution for a project or what?

erhmm, BTW where is Playa playa Pataki??

@Hannibal and Pataki,
You two "yeyes" seem to know quite a lot about prostitutes. erhmmmm, is there something you guys need to tell your aunty?

@topic
It's a known fact that "bad" girl tend to end up marrying great guys. It's just the law of pyschics. Opposites do attract. What's a girl to do??

DeepZone:
To Paris Hilton.

, I am going to tell TT dread.  Look at whom his Master have decided to " for better or worse" with

Hannibal:
Nah. . . . . .I kicked Olga out already.

Nice, I never liked her bleached-head ass either

Okija_juju:
I warned you that the juju was not NAFDAC approved. Consumption was at your own risk.

I am reporting your ass to the Department of Consumer Affairs for unethical business practices

Hannibal:
Hannizone??
I am happily married. . . . . She is just trying hard to be a mistress and i am not considering till she stops farting n burping.

erhmmmmmhmmmmm. To whom? Olga, Anatascia or Nastica?

Okija_juju:
Omo

Money is the key to Happiness o!!
Paparazzi is just a minor inconvineince O! A little sacrifice that I am willing to make for wealth.
Ask for the red light district matter, Have you ever heard of disguise or even exclusive service??


Customer I dey o!!
Business is slow this period. But by the time we enter the "ember months", things will start to look up again.

Dont crack ma ribs. BTW I need a refund, you promised me your juju will make me sing and dance like Beyounce, instead I sound like a bleating goat .

DeepZone:
Lol, that was when he had $10K.

LOL, It's not his fault oo. I made him spent it on my stilettoes , But he loaded. There is much more where that came from. Just continue doing him right girl.

@ MR & mrs>Hannizone,
Y'all "lobe" is sensational,  . let me sit back and admire.  I pray I learn a thing or two to spice up my own "married' life

Hannibal:
Emotional detachment is more like it.
Get new hobbies. . . .Ice skating, Ski or swimming classes.

OK.Dr. Phil ,