₦airaland Forum

I asked my South African mate if he had a grudge.
He said, "Yes ...
... it's where I keep my car."

Three black men are in court in South Africa facing charges of murder.
The judge asks the prosecution for the evidence on the first man.
"We found a gun in his pocket, your honour."
"Okay," says the judge, "it's the the death sentence."
The prosecution then says, "On the second man, we also found a gun in his pocket."
The judge says, "He gets the death penalty as well."
The third black man steps forward.
The prosecution says, "We never found a gun, your honour, all we found was twenty-five pence in his pocket."
The judge says, "It's the death sentence again."
The prosecution says, "Are you sure, your
honour?"
The judge replied, "Of course I'm sure; he was saving up for a fuçking gun."

Two South African policeman are patrolling one afternoon in the days of the strict government regime.
A young black teenager rides past on his bicycle.
Seeing him, the first policeman takes out his gun and shoots the boy in the head. His partner says, "What the Bleep did you do that
for?"
"Because there is a strict six o'clock curfew on all Negroes!" replies the shooter.
Still surprised, his mate exclaims, "It's only 4.30!"
"I know," states the shooter, "but I know where he lives and he'd never get home by six o'clock.

I was explaining the concept of Feng Shui to a white South African.
"Do you understand what symmetry is?", I asked.
"Ja", he replied, "its where we bury bleck
bastards."

Three South Africans, a black and two whites, are in jail, discussing what they're in for.
The first white South African is asked what he's in for, to which he replied "Robbery, and I got two years. The judge said it was lucky it wasn't armed robbery, or I'd have got five years." The second white South African is asked next, to
which he replied "Sexûal assault, and I got 7 years.
The judge said it was lucky it wasn't räpe, or I'd have got ten years."
The black South African is finally asked, to which he replied "Riding my bike without a light, and I got a life sentence. The judge said it was lucky it wasn't dark, or I'd be facing a firing squad!"

help am so obsessed with naija guys but i dont know why.i really dont like guys from my country South Africa but Nigerians hmmmmmmmmmmm i love them.

www..com/talk/topic,70272.0.html

Kwame Tout = Scum bag

I don't know what this story is all about, but I can see a brown roof in that picture. Nothing new

I cannot spend one night in Aba, my skin crawls driving past there alone. The dirtiest place in Nigeria.

londoner: OP....everyone already knows that aba is dirty and need serious gutting.

Such places are all over Nigeria.

I can categorically state that Aba is the dirtiest place in Nigeria and I've toured the country.

ba7man: Hmmmm....The Japan of Africa.

That's Nnewi

Abia state government isn't doing well, no need to beat about the bush. If tribalists want to take over and use this against Igbos, I don't care! Abia state is in shambles, we need to admit it and find a solution. How Theodore Orji got two full tenures, I'll never know.

Eko Atlantic: When are these people going to learn it's mandatory to respect the tradition and culture of their hosts?

They blamed Hausas for hating them, said Ikweres are envious of them, shout of genocide in yoruba land, cry when South Africans deal with them, same with Botswana, Malaysia, Kenya, China and now Ghana.

Is it not in the same Accra Yorubas celebrated 200 years they've migrated to Ghana and living peacefully with their hosts.

These people better check themselves in the mirror and make necessary adjustment in their manners toward other people.

Your hatred didn't allow you read the article, this has absolutely nothing to do with the diatribe you wrote above.

Acheme86: ... "still yet"? I wonder the kind of education we receive these days. you can imagine someone in LL.B5 speaking this kind of grammar

Before criticizing him, learn how to capitalize properly and know the difference between 'writing' and 'speaking'. Thanks

Glorified secondary school, Madonna is! 500 law graduates in one year?

ogugua88: Try to work on what? Is there any muscle in the breast?

stop making yourself look intelligent by attacking every comment, some of them are jokes. You take Nairaland way too seriously. SMH

spongeback: I did aerobics but you don't wanna see the pic too sexual

I am damn sure he wants to see it.

spongeback: Yeah I will be 25 on the 27th and am having a pool party so I need to work out the holiday fat

Suffergirl

Doff_Man: Is this one Biafran too?

Nigerian groom at sham marriage where he chose Celine Deon's 'The first time ever I saw your face' is jailed for 12 months
UKBA warned by Hull Registrar that couple did not know each other
Agency secretly filmed a wedding video of the bridal party at wedding
Arrested those involved and sham bride and groom jailed today
By ANNA EDWARDS

PUBLISHED: 16:01, 11 July 2013 | UPDATED: 18:00, 11 July 2013

173 shares
A Nigerian groom has been jailed for 12 months for a sham marriage where he picked Celine Dion’s song 'The first time ever I saw your face' to march down the aisle.

Hull University masters student Jayeola Abiola, 29, needed to marry to stay in the UK, and paid Portuguese Vania Pinheiro-Fernandes, 29, to be his bride.

They met for the first time at their dress rehearsal and he stumbled to pronounce her name.


Vania Pinheiro-Fernandes (right) bought her dress, tiara, wedding veil, and flowers from British Home Stores in Leeds for £245 with the groom, Jayeola Abiola (left) watching

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2360333/Nigerian-groom-sham-marriage-chose-Celine-Deons-The-time-I-saw-face-jailed-12-months.html

But this didn't make front page as usual
SMH

So Obi who they claim is weak instructed a Yoruba Alhaji to disqualify Soludo and he did?