₦airaland Forum

dayokanu:
Not while Chicharito is still breathing

Hernandez is way better than Failure Torres

torres will be better at holding the ball upfront and playing intelligent passes to his runners(rooney, nani and young).
it's no calculus. the 2 teams where torres would flourish are man utd and tottenham.

chelsea have a knack of mismanaging strikers.
kezman check! crespo check! shevchenko check! torres check!

kenis:
Dr. Okonjo-Iweala disclosed that the
biometrics exercise in the police,
brought the wage bill from N1.5 billion
per month to a mere N500 million, per
month, an indication that a huge N1
billion was going to ghost workers and
ghost pensioners each month.
She said that the federal government
would pull through with the exercise
which she said was critical in reducing
recurrent budgets, as it has become
evident that the payroll needed to be
cleaned up.
vanguardngr.com/2011/12/oil-subsidy-removal-jonathan-still-consulting-okonjo-iweala/

shocking!! Imagine if this is done to all govt agencies, ministries etc. Good try for Mrs. Ngozi Okonjo-Iwiala.

very good!
and nigerians would be saying they pay tax and they should be enjoying the benefits of their tax.
nigerians don't pay tax to the government. it is the government paying taxes to the people.

if the law enforcement arm like the police are eating 1 billion naira a month through ghost workers, i wonder what other ministries from the federal level to the state and to the local would be eating per month. it is now clear why that country is not working. the people are equally as guilty as the politicians stashing money in foreign accounts.

Ibime:
Ha! You just mad cos DM reported that Chelsea is sell the £175k a week liability called Torres for £20m.

not even abramovic is that silly.
torres won't leave in january and he won't leave in the summer. . .  .and if your erratic owner is that silly. . .abeg kindly direct torres to old trafford.
i am sure fergie would turn him into a goal monster.

Tommy Smyth of ESPN agrees with you though. According to Tommy, the story is rubbish. . . . cos the price shoulda been £5m! 

i laugh in espn. £5m for nando torres?

I think Tommy's wrong though. Chelsea might have to let him go for free plus subsidise wages at his new club. 

please drive torres to old trafford in january. he would be the best new year gift for united fans.


--------torres--------
--young----rooney----nani-
-----cleverley---carrick-----
evra---jones---rio---smalling

this team would win the league by march!

sexkillz:
[color=#000070]Pls do! We need it!
[/color]

when time permits me!

[color=#000070]Cohabitation is cohabitation! They went into it with high hopes like all you are mentioning here! If they had lived separately, dated extensively, valued the institution called marriage, respected the vows they took on the wedding day, the story would have been different!
[/color]

this is farcical! there are various factors that can cause divorce. cohabitation or lack of it is not the single cause of divorce.
i hope you are aware of that. there are other issues involved. the family background, their level of education, their ages(when they married), and their values play a big role as well. don't just isolate their cohabitation and blame their divorce on that single factor.
you are never going to win any debate with this trajectory!

[color=#000070]Who told you they married the wrong woman? How about smart idiots who shamelessly poach young ladies all because their wife put to bed? Does she not deliver the goods prior to the baby too? A useless man is a useless man! So if as a result of illness or some other unforeseen occurrence, the man cannot get sex, he is free to go outside? So much for cohabiting! A useless man is a useless man! Cohabiting even fuels this idea that you can always hightail when things are not working in your selfish interest! Cohabitation? I bow!
[/color]

smart and idi[i]o[/i]t? oxymoron?
the men poaching young ladies because their wives put to bed? do you know the last time the wives gave these men sex before putting to bed?
there's no useless man. if a man is useless - something must have caused him to. don't focus on the problem - look at the cause of the problem.

a vast majority of these men you see poaching young ladies have boring and sad sex lives.
if their wives are not willing to give, they would get it somewhere. if you don't feed a child, he might go outside and get food. the laws of nature must be obeyed.

sexkillz:
[color=#000070]As spoketh by wikipedia!. . .[/color]

i can find other stats that say otherwise.

[quote author=BABE! link=topic=825174.msg9765792#msg9765792 date=1323886072]Chei!  Nawa o. You get mind sha. Saying that kind of thing requires courage. Respect! I salute una.   [/quote]you sef see am?
how can anyone write such with a straight face? how do some people sleep at nights?

sexkillz:
[color=#000070]It's worse during cohabitation! Happened to a friend of mine! They co habited for 8 months, got married, and she turned up! Needless to say they are divorced now! Theirs did not work out![/color]

firstly, 8 months is too short a time to cohabit.
secondly, if they didn't cohabit at all, their divorce would have been quicker. your story does not prove if they had lived separately, it wouldn't have yielded the same outcome.

[color=#000070]Pretending to be happy? When you can use the same amount of time, to work on your marriage? Married men that poach for young girls are what? FOOLS! Most times, the wife can deliver the goods! So what do you say in a case where she can deliver the goods, but because the man is naturally a waste of resources, he still chases skirts! What do you call such gallivanting?[/color]

they are not tools. these are smart people who are doing very well in their careers. men that are mentally balanced but yielded to infidelity cos they had married the wrong woman who cannot deliver the goods at home. there's no man that is naturally a waste of resources. there's no dog that just snaps and starts biting people in public. it is how you groom a man that matters. if a man is well-fed, well taken care off, well-sexed and well-respected. . .the chances he would fall into fidelity is closer to 0 and than 1

neyostica:
Coogar dnt fool urself, if u meet a dissimulator, u will know cohabitation reveals nottin, also ppl change after gettin what they want, so d best is to just hope to get a good woman

isn't that the point?
of course people change when they get what they want and they also change when they know they might not get what they want.
by cohabiting her, her pretence would be revealed one day if she feels she's just being "used". the longer you keep her cohabited, the more likely you are going to discover her pretence.

Roland17:
Without a second thought, cohabitation is an exaggeration of living together, its a farce, it is wrong and very shortsighted.

how so?

Cohabitating couples are less likely to tackle the tough, thorny issues confronting their tenerous relationship when they are living together and are at disadvantage when hey get married and see their once known partners become hated strangers before their own eyes, you end up feeling deceived by your partner in marriage after cohabiting for centuries, real behaviour begin to show after marriage, that is when u hear women cry, I never knew my husband was a smoker,  never knew she was a pretender and all what not.

a woman cohabited with her partner for 2-3 years and she never knew the husband was a smoker? you make me laugh.
you are actually arguing against living separately. a chain smoker cannot hide his habits from a partner living with him. even if he hides to smoke, the scent on his clothes would convict him. abeg, you have actually buttressed my point that cohabitation is much better.

People change once vows have been taken, cohabiting before marriage is never a hedge against divorce, it is never a guarantee to claim you have fully understood someone, neither is it a guarantee for the success of the marriage.

likewise straight up marriage. with straight up marriage, you are staying with a stranger whom you dunno her hygiene habits, her cooking skills, her anger threshold, etc. everything is new. some women don't take their baths until there's an outing. all these habits would flow out seamlessly in marriage - the things the man never saw when they were living separately and they see once a month.

People who cohabit before marriage don,t enjoy great sex life in marriage, there is nothing new to explore, she begins to feel less valued sexually, its only natural for her to feel that way.

what an excuse!
so people who live separately who have had countless sex now have something new to explore?
this is the weakest point ever.

Marriage would definetly change a woman's mindset, she is going to give birth and that alone changes her psychological make up about everything, especially how she perceives life, the man is bound to have more responsibilities on his shoulder and that would definetly alter him, people end up believing marriage is all about the man and the wife, well I would tell you that school of thought is massively flawed, if couples hope to build a family together then marriage is certainly going to involve the complimentary effort of bth families.

marriage changes a woman's mindset. her status has changed - but all her characters(good/bad) have been revealed and carefully analyzed by the partner. the man already knows what he's getting into before walking the aisle with her. non-cohabiting couples do not know as much as the other divide.

neyostica:
Coogar what are the things cohabitation will reveal abt your woman that normal courtship wnt

lack of anger management
hygiene habits
sex compatibility(if he's sexkillz)
passive-aggressive sniping.

all these things can be hidden in normal courtship if either or both of them is a good pretender.

sexkillz:
[color=#000070]Is that all? Besides who said all marriages end in divorce? I get your point, but then![/color]

so you'd rather the couple don't divorce but they keep pretending to all and sundry they are married and still in love?
little wonder you see married men in female hostels poaching for young girls when the wives at home can't deliver the goods.

sexkillz:
[color=#000070]I think it should be discouraged! Even though it works for some! Most people after cohabiting and getting married, still have that notion that they can always separate and divorce at the slightest whim! So what's the point of the prior cohabitation then? [/color]

you probably think divorce is such an easy option.
men are afraid of it because of what they would have to split 50-50.

i'd rather not go into it by cohabiting and making sure i am getting good value.

michelin89:
Why are people with great intellect emotional vegetables?

because it takes more than being book-smart to handle romance.
one has to be street-smart!

Wislet:
It is rubbish. There is no respect in that. Even in those days when our mothers were courting, the bride-to-be only went to the guy's family to work or run some errands, after which she will go back to her parents' house the same day, her character being observed all that time. If at all there was any reason for her to sleep over, it was with the consent of her parents, and she will sleep with the guy's mother or sisters! Not the guy himself. But I guess 'civilization' has turned everything on its head. No sense of pride anywhere. And I guess after the 'test driving', as some of u called it (since Man's value is now equal to inanimate objects), and the guy does not like his 'car', he dumps or drops it for the next in line to test, abi? And so the cargo continues to be handed down, until the unfortunate, unsuspecting, respectable guy comes along and does the deed. Only to discover later she had cohabited with half the town. There's a difference BETWEEN Doing something wrong/going with a trend, discovering it is wrong, and making a U-turn, AND sheepishly joining the wrong crowd.

except that it wasn't the case in the time of our mothers.
far majority of them got pregnant even before their marriages. many were heavily pregnant during their weddings.
back then, a woman must actually prove her fertility by getting pregnant before marriage.

it was even worse!

Hardunnii:
@cooger i said by God's grace it will work, are u agent of darkness??

a piece of hymen is worthless to me. i would rather be an agent of darkness for something more profitable.

@kelz u can sleep with even with dogs, its your life, but dnt be mad when u hear virginity cos u aint got it no more

pssssssf!
how do we know for certain you are a virgin? what is to say you are not telling porkies here?
how are we even sure you don't engage in a[i]n[/i]al sex?

abeg, park well!

sexkillz:
[color=#000070]It looks so, but it's not! Cohabitation makes you give up easily! Marriage on the other hand makes you committed to making it work! Would you change your car every time it had a fault?[/color]

except that it doesn't.

cohabitation gives you an insight of what you should expect after marriage. if you don't then like what you see -- you can easily back off.
some of the elementary problems most couples who did not cohabit dealt with in the first few years of their marriage would have been easily nullified had they cohabited.

i mean what if my wife cannot cook? how do i know she can? all the time we were living separately, it was her housemaid doing the cooking and she had been lying it was her handiwork. so i married her and i then discovered she's a sloth, unhygienic, etc. what am i supposed to do with her then?
walk out after marriage? if we had cohabited, i would have seen those flaws.

Dgunnerz:
He wasn't a Soldier,he was a Warrior!
So,what's the difference between a Gladiator and a Warrior?

that answer lies in what happens at the ludus.

warriors need loads of training to become gladiators.
in a one v one situation. a properly trained gladiator would eat the best warrior in rome.

Goldieluks:
Sweetie being a virgin is a good thing,but it becomes useless,announcing it on a social network.
Because no one really cares,and you may even be an old woman of 60 for all we know! no offence lurv,just saying!

let her keep blaring her horns.

the funniest thing is the people she thought are irresponsible could actually be virgins themselves!
people just open their mouth to pass ridiculous judgements without knowing who they are talking to.
she's are a virgin and so what?

Hardunnii:
@coogar your point makes no sense, i didnt keep my body cos my mariage depends on it, rather cos its a temple of God will be kept for my husband only, and am sure it will work cos am dating a decent n Godfearing man

you don't get it, do you?

you have kept yourself chaste cos your body is a temple and the eiffel tower.
you have also agreed that you stand the same chance in marriage with kelz88 who is enjoying her life.

should your decent man misbehave, you have more to lose cos all your good-work keeping yourself holy has gone to waste.

Goldieluks:
Any solution yet as to what to call him?

gold-dad!

sexkillz:
[color=#000070]Are you saying that marriages without cohabitation fail?[/color]

marriages without cohabitation are more likely to fail!
if you apply common sense, it's very obvious.

Hardunnii:
Ofcourse its a possibility and vice versa

since it's 50-50, i think kelz88 should be the one hoping your marriage works well for you.
it would be a travesty to have kept yourself this holy and still get short-changed in marriage.

you have more to lose, i think.

Eiregirl:
Yes I dated him prior to this. Why? Because we were attracted to one another & wanted to get to know each other better but you can't get to know the REAL person by just dating. When you're living with each other, sleeping & waking up with each other every day. Sharing your space, bills etc is not an easy task. I just think cohabiting is a good thing before marriage. It may not be for everyone or it may not suit everyone but for me, I agree with it 100%.

you are making sense. . . . .

living together presents the chance to see just how equal you are with your partner.
the question of who pays the bills, who controls the tv remote, who cleans the bathroom or who does laundry is quickly answered.

the outcome is an important piece of information for you to know about your partner. if you are lucky, your partner values equality and if he or she does not, at least you learned it before walking down the aisle with them rather than knowing after it's too late to walk away.

[quote author=Okija_juju link=topic=825174.msg9764759#msg9764759 date=1323878907]I get the whole entrapment line of arguement, but still I dont think they should live together because all they would be doing really is https://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-sex017.gif

And I guess I hold this opinion because divorce to me, is a clear and present option should I realize that I have erred.[/quote]and for people who see divorce as a taboo or something they would rather not do. . . . .shouldn't those kind of people take more time to examine their merchandise by cohabiting?

sexkillz:
[color=#000070]Since you wanna compare cars, do they let you go home with the car? For weeks, months, years before you buy?
Why would you even think a woman is a car? What are you to her then? Her OKADA? [/color]

of course, they don't. . . . .i buy a car and use for 10 yrs. . . . .i could test-drive it for a week.
it's a matter of ratio. . . .i marry a woman for 60 yrs, i cohabitate with her for 2 yrs.


we are both each other's cars.
she rides me, i ride her(pardon the pun).

Da Doctor:
MUMU. no matter how u paint it. we all know what dating means. Are u dumb
Its not to google grammar and rant.
The fact is this. TRUTH CANNOT BE COVERED , THOUGH YOU TRY TO PAINT IT ANODA COLOUR.

see the level of your idiocy.
dating is 2 people trying out a relationship and testing if they are compatible by going out together in public as a couple.
it does not necessarily include sex.

village man!
how wont you even think dating = sex when you are a date-rap[i]i[/i]st.
i reitrate, you are an oloshious fellow.

mOST DATES THESE DAYS ISNT sexxx-free bro. Read the comment on this threda and pity most ladies. Kai. no wonder colleagues in the gyn unit are getting richer.

so you actually agree some dates don't include sex?
then why assume kelz has had sex with the men she's dated?

i just hope when you die your autopsy won't read: death by stupidity!

Hardunnii:
I just hope u endup marrying guy

i doubt she needs you to hope.
her married life could be better than yours.

sexkillz:
[color=#000070]And why?[/color]

of course, yes!
with the way women lie virtually over everything these days, i wouldn't take her word for it.
i would stay with her - test her assets and find out if she's for me.

if i was buying a car, i would test drive it.

Da Doctor:
So tell me dating is now synonymous  to S.U CHRISTIAN FELLOWSHIP

maybe you should go back to your dictionary and read the meaning of dating.
stark illiterate/homoerotic peasant having er[b]e[/b]ctions over women who are happy with the way they want to live their lives.

if you get high around virgins, go to the abbey!
oloshious fellow.

kelz88:
You are assuming how many guys I have dated, good for you.

Who knows how many more I will date, or if this is the last one? As long as I am happy doing me, I don't see how that affects your life.

i think he wants a piece of the action.
mind you, stark illiterates like him don't know the meaning of dating. . . . .to him, dating simply means "sleeping with a man".

sexkillz:
[color=#000070]I think this thread is discombobulated!

I cant even catch up! Jeez!  

Which topic are we on?
Who should i reply?
BABE or kelz, or coogar or pendo, cos i want to reply ALL!  [/color]

just keep talking about cohabitation vs marriage.
very soon, we would get back on the topic.

Eiregirl:
I didn't realise that this thread was about cohabiting & marriage. I cohabited with my husband before I married him & I'm glad I did. At least we went into marriage with our eyes open & knew what we were getting!!!

may the heavens bless you and your marriage!

Da Doctor:
@BABE. U know waht i mean , U ARE FUCHKING SKINNY. I CANT EVEN DEAL your TYPE FOR FEAR TO KILL U OR TWIST your WAIST.I dont want no casualty with dislocated vertebrae.

i doubt she also needs an overweight pregnant cow like yourself weighing 500 pounds at the age of 25. . . who would likely die of heart diseases, plus a shrivelled c[i]o[/i]ck and a face resembling a child suffering from acute mumps.

as you can see - it's [i]t[/i]it for tat!

pendo89:
lots of confusion,judgement,unfair critism,lies and heresy in one bowl.
very interesting read though.

fixed!

lots of confusion - sexkillz
judgement - hardunni
unfair criticism - da doctor
lies - hardunni
hersey - pendo.

sexkillz:
[color=#000070]Which of the above does dating and courtship not solve?[/color]

if dating and courtship solve it. . . .why do we still have so much problems in marriage?
men lying about their smoking habits, alcoholism, religion, career, financial status, etc and trapping an innocent woman into marriage.
women lying about their sexual history, their previous abortions, hygiene, pitiful kitchen skills to trap oblivious men into marriage.

there's no way a man would be blind to some of these issues if he had stayed like a year with his woman.

[color=#000070]NONE![/color]

"more likely" is the operative word.
i guess you missed that and you failed to answer the question.

[color=#000070]It's not a Nigerian mentality! You are using Nigeria to make your point! Did Nigeria ask me to cohabit? And if you want to start comparing economies, you'll also tell me it's my fault that the economy is this way! Can you really compare economies?[/color]

it is a nigerian mentality.
hypocrisy and the pathetic culture we tend to adopt actually give room for us to lie without remorse.
if a young woman stays alone by herself - the society sees her as a LovePeddler. too many quack beliefs and religious myths have f@cked up the minds of young nigerians. using the laws of 1st century and applying it in the 21st century. no wonder the country is running backwards instead of forward.

i am not comparing economies and i don't understand the question: "did nigeria ask you to cohabit?"

[color=#000070]I did not! And would not! Makes no sense to me still![/color]

haha - why don't i believe this?
you remind me of theseeker!

[color=#000070]Yeah! That's fear of commitment! I understand!
If you respect the institution called marriage and all it stands for, you WONT cohabit![/color]

cohabiting is a respect of the marriage institution.
taking my time to get it right so i wouldn't need a divorce unlike you who rush in and rush out of marriages.
check out the divorce rate in nigeria in the last few years - fools keep rushing it and rushing out after belatedly realising they made a wrong choice.

sexkillz:
[color=#000070]Is it applicable in all cases? Are you saying you dont get to know people during dating and courtship?[/color]

yes - it's applicable in all cases.
even the officiating ministers of wedding ceremonies bark it loud that what the newly-weds must have been through until the wedding is pure fantasy and the real knowing starts from that day henceforth.
so i can say with 100% certainty that you don't know what your girlfriend is until you start staying together.

[color=#000070]Cohabitation remains a personal decision! But should i cohabit without knowing all the facts? Should i cohabit because you do? What is the % of happier couples from cohabitation, as against happier married couples from scratch? Let's say i am not a Nigerian, can you make better points than these? All i see is you bringing up Nigeria! Do you know if i grew up here or not?[/color]

there's no statistics backing cohabitation/marriage but then common sense prevails.
who would know his partner more? the man living with his partner or the one who sees his partner twice a week?
answers on a postcard, please!

[color=#000070]Is dating = Cohabitation? If you have dated 10 ladies, and finally one seems to be the right one, what is the point of cohabiting with the right one?[/color]

duh! to know her better.
imagine if this was a job interview. after reading the thousands of cvs you have been flooded with, you choose some and they write a test.
after the test, you still choose like the best 10 for oral interview before deciding who's the best candidate.

same ish applies when you are looking for a partner.
this is marriage we are talking about - not nollywood audition.

one moment of foolishness and one is stuck with a jezebel for the rest of one's life. for someone like you who is religious - divorcing her is not even in your dictionary - then you either kill yourself for a f@cked up situation you have found yourself or join[b] boko haram[/b] willingly.

Goldieluks:
Babe has a daughter? Lol.

Well as for your question,since the guy is Nigerian,I don't think it would be a bad idea if your daugther calls him 'uncle' before his name,for example 'uncle mark' or something.  Cause obviously calling him 'sir,mr, or dad, gives it a different meaning entirely. But had it been he's not Nigerian,'mr' would have been appropriate.

but this child goes to school and one day she would tell her mates/teachers she found her "uncle" and her mum in bed.
do you know of any uncle in intimate congress with a mother? is uncle really appropriate?

it would have been perfect solution if this "uncle" and the original poster are living separately.

Hardunnii:
@kelz and co are u guys mad at me being a virgin or d declaratn Well few of us still av morals, if u do, u are supposed to know your body is a temple of God, so u should nt defile it.

hardunni, don't mind the jealous haters.
they are envious because you are the last nigerian virgin left.

kimberluge:
your not a spirit your jst a sexually frustrated gal  so stop deceiving urself! Am a virgin too so I shuld know

haha - it's the clash of the virgin titans.

sexkillz:
[color=#000070]No! I dont agree! If you get excited about the challenges you face and how  you go about solving them, why dont you take up Marriage on that challenge, make it your goal to solve any problems that may arise? Are you honestly going into marriage, expecting your marriage to have problems, so you can divorce? Cohabiting relationships has  a low weighted risk? Really? Do you know that some people feel used when cohabitation doesnt work in their favour? How many people do you meet out there that are ready to welcome the idea of marrying a lady/guy that has cohabited prior to meeting them? Now, if my cohabitation experiment does not work out, do you think i'll be ever willing to cohabit with another again? Instead of cohabiting, is it not wiser to get married, take up the challenge and be determined to make your marriage work? [/color]

wiser to get married with your eyes closed and then discover you have married a demon? how would that marriage work.
people who feel used when cohabitation doesn't work in their favour still have the chance to marry. compare her to the people who feel used when marriage doesn't work. . . .she's now a divorcee(something most naija young men would run away from).

who are you more likely to marry - a cohabitant or a divorcee(provided all other qualities about them are equal)?

[color=#000070]It's not a Nigerian mentality as Nigeria is not the only Religious country nor is nigeria the only country where cohabitation occurs! Those problems you mentioned about Nigeria, how many of them are a direct result of Religion? The law of the land where you currently reside, does it recognize cohabiting couples or married couples?[/color]

it's a nigerian mentality and probably majority of the 3rd world countries. young women don't leave their parents house until they are ready to marry and we are talking about mid-20s to early 30s. but in a world where 16 year old women have left home and they have partners. does it make economic sense for them to be living separately and paying bills?

sexkillz, i put it to you that if you are staying alone and paying your bills by yourself when you were a student, you would cohabit!

[color=#000070]
What causes unhappiness in marriages? Can they be avoided? No one should continue in an abusive relationship yes, but is that the way forward? Do you actually know what people go thru, to keep their marriages alive and strong? Is "Loveless marriage" Restricted to Nigeria alone?[/color]

various factors cause unhappiness in marriages. people can be happy/unhappy in marriages/cohabitating.
you are hardly making a point here.

[color=#000070]If religion is good, why not mix it with a little common sense? Marriage is not for everyone, is cohabiting for everyone then? What is the difference between living as cohabiting couples, and living as married couples?[/color]

living as cohabiting couples - neither of the parties is trapped.
living as married couples - they are both trapped(should there be a deception from any of the parties).

that is the difference!

Hardunnii:
It doesnt make sense, does it?? Sínce d guy wíll fíñd out

he will find out of course but after he's married the virgin!
they are married already - he's not going to walk out of the marriage because of a piece of hymen!

so the girl wins!