₦airaland Forum

[quote author=@labiyemmy link=topic=432581.msg5912011#msg5912011 date=1271585294]what is the meaning of a rebound though - anyone you meet after you break with your ex will always be a rebound, no matter the number of years,[/quote]To marry on the rebound: Loveless marriage to the first person that comes ones way just to get over a disappointment or break in a long term relationship.
And I disagree with the last bit, she could have waited, she could have found love again and that wouldn't be on the rebound!

lannre:
why pick on that line and not on other issues raised.

I was hoping you would substantiate the issue raised!

[quote author=Uncle_ibu link=topic=425464.msg5835382#msg5835382 date=1270493485]I mean in a local beer palour[/quote]

lannre:
I see married women who are well to do and still [u]fornicate around,[/u]I see them doing it with impunity.

Where and how on earth did you see them?

queeneve:
what is a ward?

[s]
A big room of a hospital for patients on admission. [/s] A minor under ones care.

She was being childish.

babuji:
Truly a 3 year old child still needs his mother's love. He is too young to be seperated from his mother, it can cause irreparable damage to his psyche and self esteem.

You couldn't have said it better!

sleekender:
He got a 2-year visa to the US based on the conference, not in Nigeria but in United Kingdom consulate, London.

US Consulate, London, you mean. Does he have a Nigerian passport? Is his Visa annotated?

'Am not sure if the US Embassy would issue anyone a 2yr Visa to attend a Conference, except he was issued with a visiting/business B1/B2 2yr Visa. As far as I know if the conference is his reason for going to US, he might get a Visa for the period of the conference, but usually annotated. Meaning specific purpose of travel, place and time of event is printed at the bottom of visa. e.g. "to attend a conference on agriculture from May 4 to June 10, 2010 in Baltimore, MD". And usually the visa is only valid for the duration of the conference.

If his Visa is not annotated, and he missed the conference, nobody would ever know that, would they? He would have no problems entering. But if his Visa is annotated, and he missed the conference, then his reason for the Visa application no longer exists!

rofl.

dinggle:
@Juzme
Pls educate me I have never heard of home offices approving IV in American? if I'm not mistaking that might be a UK thingy.

Correct

juzme:
You didnt read my post very well. What I mean was that since US invitation is not approved from home office it is more likely that he may not  know where the iv is coming from. I can explain to you in another way. If US invitation are approved by home office the chances of geting fake Iv is slime.

USA has no Home Office, that term is synonymous only with UK. US has a Department of Homeland Security. The three immigration agencies (ICE, CBP and USCIS) are part of Homeland Security.

ICE - Immigrations and Customs Enforcement
CBP - Customs and Border Protection
USCIS - US Citizens and Immigration Services

I would think a male child is more difficult to raise.

[quote author=invisible! link=topic=417099.msg5740184#msg5740184 date=1269221074]First I have never travelled outside naija and don't want to live outside naija because of my various business here. I want to see the world cause I have my leave next month (I work in a large established firm, popular multinational company) I have worked there for nearly 18 years, married with kids, own lots of assets, lands, only one with c of o. Can the US give me a holiday visa easily or do I need an invitation letter? What's the cost of the estimated cost for me to spend a month in the US? Can't afford to spend more time there because of my work.[/quote]Simply based on above, If I were the Consular Officer at the US Embassy/Consulate, I would refuse you a Visa. In all your 18years as Company Executive in a multi-national firm, and with all your various businesses, assets and bond not once did you, nor have you taken any member of your family outside the country for any reason whatsoever. Now all of a sudden you want to see the world!

This link might help:

https://www.usa-vfsglobal-ng.com/steps.aspx

'Am against it.

Nothing wrong with a joint account. Both of you will be signatories not either of you, that way none of you can withdraw money without the other's approval.

Not everybody steals because of greed, most times people steal things they do not even need or want, they just do it on impulse.

trinigal:
what will happen to my family if i die?

Nobody knows tomorrow!

spoilt:
I dont see why people cant understand the simple[b] social courtesies[/b] involved here.

Be it in the office setting, home front or board room, it is understood that you dont speak languages that other people around dont understand. Usually its an unspoken rule. Some companies go as far as having it in their employee hand book. It is for a reason, believe it or not. Put yourself in the shoes of the person who doesnt understand the language. You could be in the company of these people for 24 hours or the greater part of your day and not understand a single word that is said. If that is not akward I dont know what is! Its not simply because you think they are talking about you. They could be joking and laughing their heads off and you would just sit there playing with your nails completely lost not even able to enjoy the jokes. I dont see why anyone would have a problem riverting to a mutual language. It really should be instinctive. When you see the other person looking lost why would you not want to include them in the conversations? I guess you cant force your ethiquette on people.  

What would end up happening is that when they start speaking their language after some time she'll probably end you going to the other room to watch some Tv that she actually understands.   . Next thing you hear is the patronising comments like " Ah, ah our wife dont you like sitting with us"?. "Why are you always running"?  She cant win in this situation. Ive been there before.

What has 'social courtesies' got to do with the way one runs his household, or whatever happens in one's home? Is his home a public house? or a government secretariat? And understood by whom exactly? In offices and your so called board rooms of course they would speak English because that is Nigeria's lingua franca. But in his home Igbo Language is their official language, because that is where they come from and who they are! His wife voluntarily married him, left her family and became part of his family, and that is why she signed off her family name to the husbands family name, making her Ibo by marriage. She should be proud to learn and speak the language if she loves her husband. She has no excuses whatsoever.

And she doesn't need to run to the other room to watch TV when they're speaking their language, she should just run back to her father's house where they speak English.

You think only in Kano? Half of marriages everywhere end in divorce!

spoilt:
Insulting? Have you already assumed that the mother doesnt speak any English?

No, as a matter of fact, I assumed she speaks English perfectly all right. But it is rude to give one's mother conditions in one's home. She should be able to speak whatever language she is comfortable with, not forced to speak a particular language to make one's wife happy.

MRbrownJAY:
speaking another language while around a person who dont understand it is disrespectful to that person.
since the mother can communicate with wifey then i guess they speak a common language (whichever it may be).
PS: you want the wifey to learn igbo after 2yrs while the mum had her whole life to learn how to speak English. LOL!!!!

In this case it is not disrespectful, we are talking about her mother-in-law here who should be old enough to be her own mother! The wife is insecure plain and simple, thinking every conversation between mother and son in Ibo language is a coup against her. 2yrs plus the courting period is a long time to get a grip of the language.

july123:
What preoccupied her mind at the time was the $5,000.00 US that would grease her palm at the successful delivery of the substance

Just that?

MRbrownJAY:
@poster
what about simply asking your mum to speak English around the house?
as you said that your mum really like this gal then i guess she will have no problem understanding how your spouse feels and adapt.

What? that is insulting the mum!. English is not the mum's language so why should she start to speak English in the house especially to her own son? They're married with two children, long enough for his wife to have started picking her husband's native language. I hope she's not going to ask her husband not to speak Ibo to his kids too!

raintree:
@ coolier

I hope you find your poverty-stricken man and enjoy your poor + happy kind of life! 
Happy now!  Geezzzzzz,

1st post? what a friendly way to start on Nairaland! and 'am pleased to meet you too! Just a word of advice on this forum, always "be yourself" and you can never go wrong!

I don't think it's wise to take packages from strangers. I would never do it.

When is the happy day? Do we get invites?

Illegal immigrants, trying to cross the Sahara enroute France or wherever!

Don't even try, it's gonna be a waste of time. I know for a fact and from experience that one cannot have two different current student visas on one's passport. That tantamounts to being an international student in two different countries at the same period, impossible!

The only other thing you could try is to voluntarily withdraw from your university in Malaysia, get a letter of withdrawal to that effect, have them cancel your student's visa without prejudice, leave Malaysia and return to Lagos to apply to a UK university, or tell your parents to start the admission process for you while you're making plans to return home. Take your admission documents to the British High Commission and apply for a studen'ts visa. You might be lucky. But is it wise to leave certainty for uncertainty?

titibobby:
The children were very young at he time. The oldest was 5 and the youngest 6 months when their mother abandoned them.

I don't know anything about Igbo tradition, but even if it allowed for the family of a dead man to divorce his estranged wife, will it also stop the children from continuing to relate to their mother? These are grown up adults we are talking about here, the eldest 33yrs and the youngest 28yrs. They should all be married by now, maybe are parents themselves, therefore old enough to know what is good for them.

Pity about your parents and brother, don't know what to say to that.

A man should help his wife not only when she is pregnant.

I think, No. Too dangerous might end up in the wrong hands.