whizqueen:
My friend sent me this thread last night but I had too much to say so here we go.

I (A Nigerian girl living in Canada) will be responding to the OP's points and some other comments I found on the thread.


Are Nigerian Ladies in Canada lonely? Ofcourse we are! Are Nigerian girls in NIGERIA lonely? Hell yeah!!! Are Nigerian girls in other countries lonely? Absolutely!!!!! Being lonely is not a factor of location or person. It's about not finding the right friends/partner you vibe with.


Why did we immigrate? Bros are you kidding me? Canadian govt is paying me $2000 monthly and other benefits for losing income due to covid-19 Is that happening in Naija right now? All the money donated by philanthropist in Nigeria would soon disappear into the thin air without our govt giving explanation of any sort. Ofcourse, it's not bed of roses abroad neither were we expecting a man wrapped in a gift bag but please don't let your sentiments cloud your reasoning as to why people make immigration decisions abeg.


I personally feel attacked I recently posted a video on my YouTube Channel about finding love & online dating in Canada. It's asif this hope saw my video and wanted to attack me


What makes you think we would be interested in you to begin with? Don't pride yourself too much plis dear


If you like let the OP influence your decision and stop you from chasing your immigration dreams, last last it's up to you to decide what you want for your future.


Whilst I would agree with growing together with your partner and building with them. I think it's just shallow minded of anyone in this age and time to ask for women to chase marriage first before career. Marriage is not the ultimate not everyone sees marriage as an achievement. These days, if you crave for sex so much, you can pay someone to do it or get yourself a Love Machine, if you want a child, you can literally just buy a sperm and save yourself lots of stress. Most of us are yet to keep an open mind to these things, however if you want something badly there;s always a way to get it.


Most Nigerian men hate to see it happen, there are laws that protect women here and they would prefer dying single than to see women as their equals. A good number of them are control freaks and would rather their woman be at their beck and call for everything as opposed to having their marriage work as a partnership. Nigerian married man knowing the laws of the land will still go ahead and cheat on his wife with a girl living in the same condo with his wife. Una no even dey fear or respect una madam. If atall you really want to cheat, you cannot travel to Nigeria and secretly mess with girls that fancy IJGB crew or allen avenue. As expected, some women do exploit the situation but if you find yourself a god-fearing person and you do the right thing, no divorce laws or child custody issue would stop y'all from flourishing.


White men dont find us attractive? Laughs is Swahili
On the contrary most men of other races have FETISH for Nigerian girls and Black girls in general. Maybe not long term in all cases tho but they reaaaaaaally fancy us and admire our enthusiasm towards life. Whilst most Nigerian girls would likely not wanna go for the likes of 'Ryan', 'Billy' and co it's not cos we don't find them attractive. Firstly, Naija guys are smart, intelligent and goal oriented. You see the average ones already have plans for their future and working towards it unlike the counterparts who are comfortable with just a high school degree. If a Naija guy is even into technical jobs he would try to be the best at it and work towards starting his own company in the near future. Secondly, coping with someone with a different culture, lifestyle, food, etc is honestly stressful. I was talking with one Persian guy and he said before we can kiss or hold hands, we have to be temporarily married. The other chinese guy is only about 5ft tall, I'm just wondering what he would look like in that department

In Nigeria, when you visit a guy at home, some would expect you to know that's express ticket to get laid with them. But here if you visit a guy at home, you can be almost certain that if you guys have sex it's cos you wanted it, no guy will try to lure or manipulate you to straff them or tell you when you came to my house what were you thinking. They know it's important to ask for your opinion or even avoid the whole situation altogether.

Something the OP failed to address is that the Loneliness spans across both men and women living in Diaspora. Even the white people find it hard getting a partner for themselves much less an immigrant that would probably take some time to fully settle in. The system is built to have everyone mind their business, that togetherness or family-spirit is missing.

All the naija guys and ladies in Toronto have finish dating themselves. It's such a small city, everyone knows eachother thru another person only a matter of time before you find out that; the guy toasting you is ex with your colleagues' friend. Or the guy you matched with on the dating app went on a date with your housemate the day before. Some would be married and they would be on the dating apps lying to other women.

Some of us don't even mind going back home to bring men here, but 'em guys just they find paper. Only few genuinely love and care for you. I kuku know people here already do that as business tho, some ladies/guys now charge up to $30,000 to marry people from home to help them get residency here.

There are tons of Nigerians in Canada groups on WhatsApp and Telegram some are just for singles and you find people of age 35, 40, etc filled with both women and MEN. Some guys eventually resort to going back home to marry the less exposed girls, but guess what happens once they reach YYZ airport? Oh well your guess is as good as mine. Their eyes go open finish.

A good number of Naija guys are single and desperately finding love as well as ladies. Truth is, we all crave for love. And that's not a bad thing to want. Finding a good match or significant other is a honestly a game of chance. Home and Abroad, White or Black race finding a partner is truly difficult and if you got lucky finding that one special person, you better love and cherish them truly.

I rest my case; I am in the comment section waiting for someone to jump on my mention and before you do so just remember: Opinions are like as5holes and everyone is entitled to one. So this is my opinion, I have free time today

Link to Original thread https://www.nairaland.com/5782313/chai-nigerian-girls-canada-lonely

Who ever you are, you are intelligent and will be a very loving person. Honestly, I will become your friend, if you are open to making friends. (I stay in Nigeria).

Lastly, hope you are God-fearing too? Cos I am.

flokii:
@OP In as much as you have strong points, I can't support this.

The society in a way has been like this. guys to do the bringing while the ladies do the taking.

Telling guys no to do the bringing anymore traslates to more ladies turning to hustlers i.e. runs, prostitution, ritualists, armed robbers, 419, yahoo. etc. to survive.
PS; I'm not saying there are no strong and working class ladies but the larger percentage depend on their guys, relatives, family members etc. for their needs.

I don't want a situation where ladies I don't know will be sexually harassing me or inviting me to treat

You don't read, and you are showing your stupidity here.

2dice01:
Some Girls are on Monthly salary from Boyfriends so she wont look outside

Las Las all na Scam

Meanwhile, she is asking for dick from a guy that can turn her head upside with his tail.

yanabasee:


She's my woman.. I see it as my responsibility to make her happy as she sees it as her responsibility to keep me happy...

No one said, don't give her money. What he stand on is her demanding.

In as much as she is not your wife, na express you still dey.

A woman does not need you to be happy. Most of them watch comedy, films, erotics, and play away on social media.

A woman see a man has someone who is heading to where she wants to go too.

That's what brings the attraction.

For instance, let say you are dating a single mother. Her goals will be to find a man who can love that child, be affectionate to both her and the child together.

If you are the type that enjoys that life. Let say, you just lost your wife(God forbid). She will trust you more, and want you more because, you are a daddy and understand the love of a child.

Two:
Money makes people happy truly, but all happiness need to keep coming. That's why comedians do show and vid regulary.

Because, anyone can easily get bored.

She will use a strong reason to allow you to led her.

It's not the money. It who you are, and what you can give as a person.

Hope this makes sense.[/quote]

This make sense.

A woman who will leave will leave either you give her money or not. Women go after what they want.

Don't be afraid she will leave. Why you are afraid, someone is looking somewhere hoping to get closer to you and be for you always.

oka4ugoo:
Thought their President during a press conference said that their members have been advice to suspend service and stay at home as directed by the Government. So members of the parallel body went about providing essential services to their demented customers.

They can also work from home.�

IAMPhoenix007:



Chemline House, 7 Obasa Rd, Ikeja I remember this one, they waste my time eh... I sensed something wasn't right immediately I step into the premises, I should have trusted by instinct and leave immediately but then I needed a job. just avoid any interview you didn't apply for around ikeja especially ogba or alausa, they are all GNLD.

Lol.�

Those guys deserve beating.

GNLD is not bad. At least there product work. But the sales and marketers they have, all make it a fraud.

I was at Chemline House, 7 Obasa Rd, Ikeja. Sometimes, the wouldn't put Obasa. They will say, second gate, beside a company like that.

From the entrance to the room for interview, it was all suspicious. Everyone of them standing like soldier in pair, at every corner of the stairs.

The horrible thing is, we all sat in a room, with 4 morons (their soldiers) at the four corners of the room, sweating with us in a room with a small standing fan. They were all dressed in suit and tie (awon werey).

I observed everyone was quiet, and it looks strange to me. I want to interact. So, I initiated a convo, only for me to be told I am distracting others. Egbami! is this a cemetery. At this point, I have confirmed they are GNLD, even though they want to Bobo everyone.

I waited for some time, before I disrupt everything for them. Last last, I cause a scene there o... Immediately, the head came around to invite me to please come out of that room, so that I won't pollute others.

I told them to take me into the room for the interview. On getting inside, it was similar to where I was before. Suit and tie guys sweating like goats without electricity.

I sat, before a lady. She was the one asking me what I came here for. Although, I explained to her that I was there for an interview for the role of a business data analyst intern. She heard me, but didn't know anything about data analysis. Instead, she was asking about if I can sell. If I have business skills in meeting people et al. I completely wept inside, for wasting my time and money to come here. It wasn't her fault, all she know is to sell drug.

I left, and didn't bother for response.

These people are terrible.

WARNING: Don't sign up on this website - JOBOMAS (Google search it). Its a GNLD website. They claim to be an HR consulting firm.

They form all manners of names as company, and spam your email with excess messages of those fake companies recruitment.

Please, endeavour to Google search a company, its address, before coming. Some of these firms, don't exist.

Goodplace:
Pls advice... If a person is earning 130k Monthly and having the intention of getting married soonest and paying rent of 270k/ yearly can he consider that job a good one and moreover can he get married comfortably?

Your Job is a good one, if you are paying such an amount. Before you marry her, make sure she has a source of income. Everyother thing is small.

iramure:
Dedicate 30k for rent monthly, live reasonably with 80k per month. With that, is like you are not paying rent. Try to have savings of about 20k monthly. Let's see how far you will go

What about the tithe?

This one that looks like pastor. Afi ayanfe.

Kenshinmunac:
*sigh* searching and searching for a girlfriend, all to no avail. Young cool fine guy, but very lonely, no girlfriend. I don't think at this point with all this rejection that I will ever get married in life.

I have searching for a gf, met some girls who turned out to be nasty gold diggers, I didn't wanna waste my time on them cause I'm not a flirt, I'm not looking for a short term relationship so having "fun" with all these girls seemed like a waste of time to me as Sex is not my problem, love is.

So I met this girl few days back, we got talking, I fell for her instantly, she looked calm and very honest, she is not all these girls who do kk in chat, she is caring and very simple, hard to come by., we flowed really well chatting and I was very happy I found someone as I quickly asked her out and she said "let's see how it goes"

I said okay, so today being Sunday, normal chilling day, I called her, very eager to see her beautiful face once more, we got talking and she said I should come to her side.

So I said okay by six,

Six reach I entered road straight to her side, 30 mins drive, when I got close I dialled her number twice she didn't pick I thought maybe she was taking her bath or something was patient and kept on going, so when I got there by 7pm, I called and called but she didn't pick up the call and she was expecting me o!

Na so I begin call her, Even send whatsapp message and direct message all to no avail. I got so maddddd and pissed off, I almost cried because I don't know why I'm being treated like this by ladies. Head to toe I complete, face I fine, fashion sense Is great, but yet, my handsomeness and the growing cash I get can't even get me the slightest fly talk less about a lady

*sigh*

By 5 mins past 8 she called me, by then I was already going home, and she began to plead, this where error words.

"please I'm sorry, my elder brother took my phone to share WiFi, I didn't know he would go far"

I asked "didn't you tell him you were expecting someone"?"

She replied" i did na but he did not listen, I can't just come and stand on the road and be waiting for you, please don't be angry"

In my heart I said Chai! What kind of excuse is this?? This girl just told me indirectly that I'm not important.

So painful.

I see guys with their girl very happy preparing for Christmas, me i have none. All I do is admire beautiful couples and wish It could be......

Unfortunately the sad reality greets me in my face.

I begin to lose my self confidence gradually because of rejection.

Smh, all I feel right now is self pity, all I can do is lament.

I don't know if I just dislike women right now self.

THESE WOMEN THING, YOU NEED TO LEARN A LOT. I WILL USE YOUR WRITE UP AS MY MESSAGE.

1. Don't search. You are suppose to look out for the one you want to care for, and understand why you want to do it. Some, it's to date them and have the feeling of a woman around (what you deeply want). Some is to Bleep. Some is to enjoy each other's company and maybe sex. Try "friendship with benefits". Not necessarily sex, sometimes it may be food, gift, she will reward you with, and she may reward
you with sex unexpected, if you get mind.

2. A woman will always have fun. If you don't want fun, you are going to get married to someone who have had her fun with men and she is ready to move into marriage with you. It's your choice there.

3. Women love flirts. Although they deny it. You need to flirt without showing your intimate intentions. Then, you will understand, for the fact that a woman is emotionally available, doesn't mean she won't have sex with men.

4. "She said you should come" sound like she is the one cutting the shot. So wrong. Next time, don't go to her place. Rather, invite her to your place, or take her out for the fun.

5. Her excuse is hers, and it is legit because you made it become legit.

Lyydia:


Here is the deal, we plan on no sex before marriage due to personal reasons. I don't ask for money also, we do cuddle and kiss sometimes. But not sex!

We? Noo. It's more like you initiated the idea of "no sex" however, to keep him you offer cuddle and kiss. What do you now expect�. He will want to dick you.

It's either you are ready to bear the consequence of choosing "no sex" by remaining single, or flow along.

I am not sure both of you are virgin self. Most ladies using this strategy is a turn off.

.

Once a woman start misbehaving and stop caring about you, she treated you like an option.

We have lost almost everything. From vulture, to morality, respect, honour, fidelity, loyalty, faith, to support. The only thing we have left is money.

Realise she can't stay without a man's touch.

Fortuneadeniyi:

Oga ..I'm a man u fan.let's sign some midfielders first

Either way, we won't be between 1-3 at the end. Success is Predictable.

izzou:
But sincerely, why do ladies do this?

You see a male celebrity. You know he has a wife or he has numerous kids, yet you open your legs for him, get pregnant and live with the stress of babymamaship for a long part of your life.

Why?

Prick they are suppose to enjoy without baby intervention.

SteveOfu:
what's wrong in asking how much your earn?

I will return the gesture. How much do you charge for a night.

anochuko01:

Who be this one

Pastor son

Freedom is sweet. Don't underestimate it.

Looks like he is talking from the abroad.

.

Lightangel65:


You are a sex addicted olosho that's why you don't know that there are men who don't like women

Which men? Do they masturbate often.

Thalamus:


leicester is no equal to man u.

It's because they are not consistent yet. This is how Spurs began.

Leicester lost most of my their best player when they won the league. This season, they are back to second position with a new team emerging.

Egobe:




He will be earning ×3 of what he earns, we all work for the Mullah,f*ck table position.

He will rather choose a better team to earn x3

Fortuneadeniyi:

They are second for now..

Thats a position Man United will not attain this season.

Leicester is second on the table. and you want Madison to leave for United? Stupid news.

StephenBB:
I'm still waiting for Ini Edo, Empress Njamah and co ��

Wait till Jesus commeth

Lightangel65:
They think am gay because I dislike women. Which is wrong.

Are you not gay why will a man dislike woman.

Mightyhaiz:
My younger bro ,a very bright guy went for over 30 interviews with no result,..until I had to do what I had to do .


All these u listed op no scratch surface for naija.

Baba abeg share the gist Jare.