₦airaland Forum

Chikicaka:
It would come, sooner than you expect, stay strong, keep praying and work hard, stuffs like this go both ways, my ex back then we both had nothing only our dreams, we prayed together, hustled together and worked hard together, I gave up a lot and supported him more than I even supported myself and he hit it, came home one day and said he needed space, that he needed to mix up with the same crowd he now rolls in, no sugar coated words but he gave me hot hot, I was crushed, I was battling with my weight and felt inadequate, but I moved on today if you see me you would not recognize me at all, God has restored in a million folds all that i felt i had lost, he came back begging i forgave him but couldn't stoop so low again this time he was truly not my level anymore, I took that pain and it propelled me, thankfully he was just a boyfriend and not a hubby, as in this case she is your wife, zone in on her good qualities and forgive her, tell her how much her attitude hurts you,, hopefully she changes, may God bless us all.

Amen to that prayer and May God bless you more.

ecology:
Listen very well,if you must survive this,you must learn how to endure this trying period I faced similar situation for about three years until God answered me last July.Just cry more to God and don't hold anything against your wife and don't let anything she does surprises you that's how it has been.I am happy you are not the lazy type just pick whatever your hand could find to support the family you will soon overcome and earn your position back.

Same thing I told him. Cry to God... He will. Answer.

BiggyB242:
They are rare as you have said but there are things which are most important. Most women are loyal because of the money their husband possess. I need the cash not impress one woman but to leave a better life and give my family one; immediate and extended.

Na so e b bros.

BiggyB242:
Reason why "wise" a man stick to the woman who was with him when he had nothing. Most women love you for your money but thank God not all, that's why I impress a woman with my personality rather than the comfort she thinks I can afford her.

Las las Na woman when go give us peace of mind naim we need, is neither beauty nor profession, but there are some ladies who come with the whole package though.

That whole package is rare. It's like 1 in 100.

Few minutes ago, I was saying to myself, some men will say their wife is different since they are well off.

But these men need to start asking questions like: if I am broke, will this woman still stand by me?

MJBOLT:

i'm currently watching a movie on Africa Magic titled Broken Power,it's is similar to the op's predicament.

Jeez

BiggyB242:
I pity your BF, that's if you have one for having such a mentality. You think those wealthy men today are wealthy because they hustle more. Life has its way, there are many contributed factors. Some acquire their wealth through illegal/dubious means, others came from a rich homes with connect, some the course they read isn't a favourable, others work their way to the top. etc.

This is the reason we have so many yahoo boys, ritualist etc just to prove to their women that they are "hustler".

Money changes men and women but that doesn't make what she's does right. Is like saying a lot of men cheat so you should a get a pass for cheating on an innocent man.

Leave them. They don't know.

DonFreshmoney:
Shehu Sami with his mighty head dont have sense... how can you use efcc chairman name to scam a car dealer? Didnt he know that the deal might go south and the dealer would report him to efcc.

I always thought this man has sense, but it seems when money is involved, politicians throw away their sense to the bin

and u believe that? As you big reach like this, with exposure of Sani, will you use such method to defraud someone when you know you can easily be caught?

The truth will come out las las

strungup79:
Will take this advice. Need to learn a new skill and unlearn some habits. Maybe I should focus on myself. I've been more about making others happy as I derive happiness from it

You dont need to say too much. I am same too but the worse mistake we can make is deprive ourselves the comfort and happiness we give others and deny ourselves same... It diminishes our values in the eyes of those we give it to than when the reverse is the case...


Some things happen for a reason... It was meant to show you whom you have been sacrificing for. Please go watch Tyler Perry's movies, I can't remember the name and you will see what you are experiencing in the movie.

In that movie, a guy married this lady, he wasn't financially buoyant but just getting by. Then he and his wife work in same company, I think the dude was a labourer in the construction company and his wife a secretary of sort. Then the son to the owner of the company picked interest in her and she started getting money more than her salary.

When her husband tries to touch her she avoids him, she was furking a white guy and avoiding her legally married husband.

At this stage the husband had no clue what was happening behind his back because he trusted her wholly. I mean, why shouldn't he?

The husband was a friend to TYLER Perry in the movie and Tyler got to find out what was happening and he told his friend. He was shocked and confronted her and she rebuked him. Out of anger, he slapped her so much that she fell behind a counter in her mother's shop.

Well to cut long story shut, table turned, white guy went back to his wife, her husband got his business running after moving out, the business he tried to present to the white guy who forked his wife but got declined.

She then tried to "form" love but dude refused. She also didn't know her own mother whom she insulted cos of the diick she was forking for trying to correct her was a shareholder in the said company.

At the end, she lost everything.

Do you want me to tell you what a girl said to me just to get rid of me, even when she is not financially better than I? But my God has always have a way of exposing useless elements in my life, and I MEAN ALWAYS in caps.

I prayed one night before going to bed... It was one of those deep prayers I often indulge in when my backs is against the wall because I am an orphan without any relative in high places to rescue me, no big man friend of sort.

It was this sort of prayer I did few years ago that made me my first millions but I was carried away and squandered it.

2 weeks later after that prayer a massive door opened in my life that had me shocked. Till this moment I still do not believe it.

If the door had opened while she was with me, I wouldn't know I was getting "fake love" and when I go down tomorrow, she will start acting like your wife.

A month after I have another business developed and its gaining interest from every organisation we have presented it to... They love the idea and all I can tell you is that my 2020 is made.

I have become humble because this not the first time God has saved me from what could have wrecked me had some misfortune(blessing in disguise) hadn't occur..

I am not a regular church goer, I am not a strong praying person but there are some prayers I have involved that got answered.

I do hope you can pick a lesson from this.

I want you to cry to God...i do not mean those unserious noisy prayers that people indulge in. I mean the silent kind that connects your soul,even when you are not moving lips but mind is speaking heavily. If you do not believe in God like some person's, speak whatever you want into your existence... Ask for ideas and direction, then go out and work like a mad man.

Also try to change the kind of people you hang out with. If everyone is always complaining around you, you will always complain. Make new friends with movers and those who make mountains move.

funmisticqueen:
You are not the only one hiding a monster within.

There are worse things out there than you

I don't remember quoting you, biitch

owowa145:
Trust me, the woman has co-conspired with key person in her family to go spiritual with d man to become d woman in d house. He needs divine intervention. His downturn ain't normal.

no.... You are wrong. Don't spiritualize everything when clearly it's human error at work.

I am still waiting for him to give details of the business he was into cos I asked so that we can put heads together and channel out something.

ProtectMyMoney:
Be a man! This 2020.

most of you just like making blanket statements. If you can't give break down of how the man can get out of current situation, please do not waste nairaland bandwidth

Martinez39:
Michellekabod2, Ubunja and Co. Was this not what we were discussing? Give a man power, money, and make him the bread winner, his family will benefit from him. Give a woman money, power, and make her the bread winner, her husband will see hell. OP needs to take the red-pill.

Even though the man is at home, his wife has turned turned the kids against him in the cruel and petty game of power dynamics. And many girls had the dishonesty to attack me when I created THIS TOPIC and they acted like parental alienation is not really a thing to worry about and the father should "just spend some time with the kid". Here is a man who is present in his home and yet the kid has turned against him (a case similar to that of emmaodet). Never underestimate the power of brain washing and the wickedness and brutal nature of women. Women are not fair players.

Indeed, Ilekokonit was right in THIS TOPIC OF HIS. Also the arguments and contributions made by ubunja and myself are valid. A family is supposed to work as a unit but the woman purchased properties without the man's knowledge, turned the kids against him, and disrespects him yet folks like funmisticqueen (whose personality is as ugly as she looks) turned this on the man insinuating that the man must have been cruel to his wife in the past. The op opened a joint account with his wife but now, the wife has gotten a secret account.

Any man that remains oblivious to female nature will suffer and get burnt.

While I agree with first link, I disagree with the second.

I am cool and I am mad.

There is a reason why i vowed that the only metric a woman will last in my house is her character. Don't give me headache, I don't give people. Headache either. I don't joke with my peace of mind, I don't like stress.

The moment a woman causes this, you bring out the beast in me. You will come face to face with a monster.

making money is about hustling

Mr, go and hustle

change line of business

ignore your wife and stop giving her attention, but she no try at all

my advice is simple, if you arent making it, find another location, move there alone and hustle hard, send upkeeping for children to your wife

men arent suppose to be complaining all the time, we are problem solvers, lets use our initiative to provide solutions to our problem

Change business? Good.

What business should he change to? Voice mail.

Solve problems? Good.

What kind of problems can he solve and how does this make him money? Voice mail.

strungup79:
I'm always out of town looking for one job or business. I've just been unfortunate that all my efforts have yielded little or no fruit. It's almost as if there's a curse working against me.

No curse is on you. Have you taken any new training or skill to reposition yourself during this period?

See, as times go on, some previous opportunities loses relevance and new ones are birthed. If you hold on to the past, you will become irrelevant.

I was at a shop to do some graphic works few days ago. The owner of the shop gave his staff just just a phone to take passport and print it out.

This was previously the work of cameras in the past but technology has rendered cameras useless with the emergence of smart phone.

And it practically ended the reigns of global brands like Kodak and others.

I could cite numerous examples but I am sure you get the drift.

That is the point.

Blakjewelry:
Clear your head and stay focus. This is the point I was trying to raise when people talk about broke guy issue. So what happened if things go wrong in the future, our parents where true to each other no matter the situation or condition. Just try and dust yourself up, just believe you can do it again, being frustrated will only keep you from achieving your goals, I pray 2020 smile on you

my brother, who no go, no know.

strungup79:
You are just like my wife. If marriage is about control, why marry? Why not stay on your own? Making money is not about hustling, if it was i'd be earning over three times what my wife earns. Luck, favour also plays a role. Maybe God just wants to show me who I married.

you answered that bitch well.

strungup79:
I'm 42 years old and married with 3 children (2 boys and a girl). I got married to this beatiful lady 13 years ago and everything was bliss until three years ago when my business experienced a serious down turn. My wife on the other hand witnessed an upturn in fortunes and practically became the bread winner in the home. Her good financial fortune had me focussed on trying to get myself back on track. I tried getting a job, but it was not forth coming. My business continued to dwindle and then I resorted to doing small odd jobs just so I could contribute to the family upkeep.
My wife's upturn in fortune however brought out the ugliness in her. She started trying to assume control of the home. She stopped consulting me on decisions concerning our home, rather consulting her parents. She practically turned my kids against me as she painted me as irresponsible. We initially had assess to each other's account, but now she has accounts hidden from me. I just found out she bought land somewhere, though she doesn't know I have that knowledge. She has become rude and disrespectful and her parents and siblings have taken over my home. I am so pained because all I ever did was show her love and respect. She didn't like the fact i tried to have order in my home and that seems to be my sin. I have never hit her or been wicked to her. Right now, I'm pained and confused. I don't know what to do. Someone please help.

This is what women are. 90% of them are like that. Once they are above you, they feel on top of the world.

What kind of business were you into. Let's start from there. I and other business savvy minds may be able to help with some insights.

Depressed101:
i am available if i can fit in anywhere i am based in the south

no problem bro.

Depressed101:
wow that's good news, i am following i wish you Goodluck

Thanks man. My Goal is to touch all Southern States with the said product. So it is gonna be hard work through out 2020.

Depressed101:
i will be very happy if your inquiries turn fruitful.. I've done mini importation too... Pls mention me if you find anything..

Okay bro, I didn't get reply from anyone but I have decided to dive in like that.

Let me give you my scope.

I identified a sector, then dig deep to find a subsector.

I am currently working with an insider of a company, which is serving as our take off point.

They have presented the idea to their boss and the boss is interested. Next step is to discuss with stakeholders of the organisation about the new development but will be after festive season, from January upwards.

However, the insider will get a cut after execution. This part is very important. Let them know they will get a cut after execution if you really want to see your deal done. This makes them agile and agitated to work hard and bring it to fruition.

After meeting with stakeholders, they may require us to present a proposal (and sample) which I have ready and waiting.

That is about it bro.

okay

jayfolarin:
You are not very smart if you think buhari's madness wont reach you or your loved ones.

this is not about reaching him... when you guys were supporting Buhari, you thought it was just going to be Igbos that will suffer for it... now, what is happening?

Baba MadCow, I site you o . chai, see men them when Nairaland was still good place.

jokers...

Coldie:
When Andy Ruiz who is Mexican American entered d ring he played the anthems of his 2countries.

But this guy British Nigerian only played the anthem of Britain. Me as a Nigerian to me that is an insult to our country

Which insult? What has Nigerian done for him, except famzing when he had become famous, that warrant his patriotism? Andy likely did that because his people didn't wait for him to become famous before they supported him.

Your Nigerian senators and stupid president are famzing on his fame, while we have lots of boxers on our streets without the required support. Is it not a shame that we only get to hear about these guys when they find their footings in developed climes?

FORK YOU ALL!

Preciousgirl:
Why? Is it so strange to give someone your picture?

So you do not know boundaries in marriage? How old are you?

Southsoul:
Una never learn una eyes go soon clear

Nigerians are just making mouth on how they will do this or that.

Na here we go dey and they won't do shiiit.

Please go through

Omoodua007:
No wonder they always unity beg with SS
Parasitic Biafruds

you are someone's father. I just want to remind you.

TheSkyIsBlue:
My Sister Is About To Commit A Serious Taboo All In The Name Of Marriage

Hello Nairalanders!

Please ignore any typographical or grammatical error. I just want to pour it out the way it is in my heart.

I am seriously confused and worried about what is happening in my family and I will appreciate your candid advice.

There is this guy my sister has been in a relationship with for over seven years now. so he actually asked her hand in marriage and decided to come see my parents for introduction, about some months ago. My family decided to take their time to find out more about the guys family background as is required in Igbo tradition.

After several questions asked, my family came to find out that the guy is an Osu (an outcast). On knowing this, everybody in my family told my sister to cut ties with him and discontinue the relationship because it is a big taboo to get married to an Osu in my place . If you do, no family member or friend will attend your wedding or even have anything to do with you again.

But my sister refused to listen to anybody claiming she really loves the guy, that they have been together for a very long time and that she is not getting younger anymore (mind you, she is in her early thirties). Everybody (my parents and extended family members) tried to talk her out of it but she still didn't listen.

After much pressure and her continues insistence, my dad decided to give them his blessings, although against his wish (my dad is actually not really deep into tradition). Now the guy has done all the traditional rights and paid for her dowry. Their wedding is coming up soon.

But the problem now is, according to tradition and from what I heard, if she was allowed to go with the guy without my dad giving them his blessings, the stigma would have just been on her and she alone would have been considered Osu, since she insisted to continue with the marriage. But now that my dad has given them his blessings, it is considered that all of us (her siblings) will also have that link of Osu too. Except if she decide to put an end to the relationship and discontinue with the wedding, which I don't think my sister is ready to do.

I am really worried and depressed about it, cause I don't want anything that will affect me tomorrow when I want to get married just because of my sister's mistakes.

I will really like to get opinions and sincere advice especially from those that are familiar with tradition, cause I'm seriously bothered. Thanks!

Leave them alone and let them marry.
I stopped reading when I got to that Osu rubbish. So with all your education, you still believe in this Osu rubbish.

Make I see who tell me that nonsense. I wil ban everyone and get married like that.

Omoodua007:
All the numbers you have stated are not up to 97
I have not even started with Asia where your kiths are rotting away especially Anambra and imo women

if not that you stupid, you will not start this nonsense. Do u want to tell me u do not have igbo friends offline? Why are people so useless like this?

kayusely70:
The problem with nigeria is uneven development one part is progressing while other one is retrogressing pulling the nation backward

when we asked for division or decentralization of Nigeria, they call us names.