Privateworld: I did traditional marriage may 2024 and this month makes it two years now. My main issue is my wife hasnt put to bed and i dont have patience anymore. I want a child and i dont want to be disrespectful by having an affair while been in marriage. I want to return her bride price and look for someone else.
I need advice on the how to go about the process of returning bride price. She is a calabar girl and I'm from Adamawa .
Ameduedwin: Good afternoon house, I will like to be brief here.
I am about to take my wife home to her parents even though her both parents are dead, I married this lady 2019 with two kids, fast forward to 2020, immediately this lady delivered her first child, she changed, started misbehaving, talking back at me, with insult, nagging and all sort of aggressiveness towards me.
I call some few members of my family to come and talk to her, after talking it didn't yield useful result, in many case, this girl doesn't want me to touch her sexually, I have to manage her like that for seven years now, but now I have fed up with her character and I have decided to take her home to her parents house.
As of now nobody in her mother's room now, the room is under lock and key, and only their step mother that is in the compound for now.
My worries is my children, am I not exposing them to some danger of any kind? As for my wife she doesn't fill remorse at all, she have already started preparing her belongings to travel maybe because she knew my children are so glue to me, she thinks I can't send them home.
What did you advice me to do in this case. Thanks you all..
Goldrosewine: This does not imply sexual interests, abeg o just bored today on this holiday and I have decided to rant here, since I saw a similar post recently about a guy saying confidence is what a lady cannot resist in a man. I won't appreciate any unsolicited messages🙏
Dentition: Gap teeth (you know what I mean, especially a small one right between the central incisors) or just between the lateral incisor and canine)
Thick wrist (not fats deposit, just wrists with a wide circumference)
Minimal or no bodily hairs. Yeah a lot will hate me for this, just my opinion which may change or not. But those beards, chest or armpit hairs? Taah!
Height. However you must not be too tall. I am 5:9 so anything from 5:6 to 5:11 is perfect.
Modesty and awesomeness (not extreme masculinity) I am not a feminist abeg. I like guys that are gentle, pull the chair for you at the restaurant, hold an umbrella for you, hold the door open for you, just being a gentleman. Absolute modesty and simple too. Not a show off dude haha!
Healthy lifestyle. There is nothing I dislike more than a guy who smokes or drinks or do both. I don't just dislike them, I h-word them. Take your good health seriously guys, go for rehab if you need to.
Small inner circle. Guys with few or no friends. The introvert who enjoys his own company.
Respectful. The guy that still prostrate to greet his dad at 30 years, still run errands for his mom at 35 (not necessarily because he is living with them, but maybe sometimes when he visits or when they give him an emergency call) that level of respect is the norm for every omoluabi.
Not bald. As much as I dislike body hairs, e no reach head abeg🤣
Belly fat. (Not pot belly) I love belly fat in a man, especially the type that gives him the wealthy boy vibe when he's in a native. I don't know but in Benin republic, I once saw this muscular, six pack guy that bullied people and he had an altercation with this gentle guy who looks ordinary, he even had a fatty belly. Against what people thought, it was the muscular guy that needed saving o, see blue black beating. Lol. It kind of left an impression on me.
Speech intelligence. Even if you no know book, just have good oratory skills and be eloquent. I would like to see my man on a podium speaking with great eloquence while I sit in the crowd or assembly just admiring him and looking at how other ladies are admiring him😊🥰🥰🥰 aiish
Phobia. Scared of snakes or rats or spiders or cocroaches lol even my cousin would tell me I will never find this trait in a Nigerian man. But I am not scared of those things. So I would really like a guy that has such fears, that way I would be able to do something for him and it would make me feel good🤦🙈 it's hard to explain honestly.🥲🥲
Ambitious. he dreams big, not jealous of success, just envying it and ambitious to reach the top too.
Laughs a lot. That would be golden!
He cries. Like, weep Take this from me. If you ever express your sadness in tears while in your girl's arm, it does something to her heart... she'd start clutching to you so hard. Don't be manly all the time. Sometimes, just let the feelings flow. Life is already hard for everyone, talkless a man.🥺 I feel u guys.
Straight legs No vex but I dislike wobbly legs... and many guys have come to have a sort of disfigured legs due to bad walking posture, trying to copy one silly trend or so, etc.
Gentle with kids and pets That would be another golden trait!
Extremely decent with words and actions when in public The way he eats, talks, interact, just everything. Especially in Nigeria where people judge you by your countenance and how you 'carry' yourself.
You know the sort of guys that gleefully talk about women's body parts in public? That's so uncouth and all ladies detest such.
lordm: They didn't force you to collect it. You saw the terms and conditions and you went ahead.
If Nigeria had working institutions, those loan apps won't be working in the first place, talk more of issuing loans with above 40% interest in some cases.
oarowosola: Honestly, you guys are funny as hell. Some of the roasts had me laughing, some were annoying, but overall I enjoyed reading the comments.
But one thing I need people to understand is this, I didn’t come here because I was looking for relationship advice. At the point I made that first post, my mind was already made up. I was already mentally done with the relationship long before I even typed anything.
The reason I shared the story was mostly because I was exhausted mentally, and I also wanted people to see how extreme certain situations can get in relationships. Sometimes people think you’re exaggerating until you start explaining the details.
Truth be told, this breakup didn’t happen overnight.
I had already been thinking about ending things for a very long time. The only thing holding me back was the fact that she is actually an amazing person in some ways. She has a soft heart, and I knew breaking up with her was going to hurt her deeply, so I kept trying to find the best possible way to do it without completely destroying her emotionally.
But the events of that final weekend just pushed me over the edge.
The way she left my kitchen after staying over, combined with everything that happened the night before, was what finally made me snap internally. It wasn’t that I suddenly realized all the issues that day. No. Those things had been building up in my mind for months.
Before I eventually sent the breakup message, I had already started emotionally withdrawing from the relationship. I stopped calling as much, stopped texting often, and stopped engaging the way I used to. She noticed it too. She kept asking what was wrong, and I would just say I’m fine, even though she knew something was clearly off.
Eventually I realized I couldn’t keep dragging it out forever. I didn’t want to keep pretending while mentally checking out. So I finally sent her a message telling her I was no longer interested in continuing the relationship.
At first, she was shocked.
She kept asking how someone could end a relationship of over a year through text without explanation. She asked if there was another person involved. She begged me not to ignore her. She said she was trying to stay calm because she was outside in public.
Honestly, reading those messages affected me because despite everything, I’m still human. I’m not heartless.
So instead of completely shutting her out, I told her we could talk later because I was busy with work at that moment.
Later that night, I finally picked up her call.
And for the first time, I explained everything fully.
I explained how draining the relationship had become for me mentally. I explained how uncomfortable I constantly felt because of the difference in our lifestyles, hygiene, responsibilities, communication patterns, effort, and overall approach to life.
I explained the incidents that stayed in my head for months, the constant untidiness, the dirty environments, the financial imbalance, the times I felt taken for granted, the moments I cleaned her entire house just to prove that basic cleanliness was not impossible.
And no, cleaning her house was never a sign of weakness or simping to me.
I did it because I loved her.
I genuinely believed maybe if I showed her how simple it was to maintain a clean environment, things would improve. That was all. But instead, things kept repeating themselves over and over again.
I also explained how frustrating it felt to constantly give financially, emotionally, and physically while feeling like the same level of thoughtfulness wasn’t being returned consistently.
By the end of the call, she broke down crying and started apologizing repeatedly. She begged me to give her another chance. She promised she would change. She promised she would work on herself and become better.
And honestly… I softened.
Maybe because deep down, despite everything, I still cared about her.
So I gave her another chance, but I made myself very clear.
I told her this wasn’t about pretending for one week or acting differently temporarily because she got called out. I told her real change has to become natural. Cleanliness, responsibility, effort, and self awareness cannot be something you perform temporarily just to save a relationship.
I told her:
“Please change for yourself, for your future kids, and for me too. Don’t just act differently now and later return to old habits. Let it become part of you naturally.
As a lady, I honestly expected you to even be correcting me on certain things, not the other way around. I’m putting a lot on the line emotionally, and I don’t want to regret my decisions later in life.
I’m not saying this like I’m doing you a favor. There are billions of men better than me, just like there are women better than you. Nobody is irreplaceable. But while two people are trying to build something meaningful together, both people should be actively working on themselves.
You are free to call out my own flaws too because I’m not a perfect human being. Relationships are supposed to be about growth, accountability, and complementing each other. The moment two people stop growing and start merely tolerating bad patterns, the relationship slowly becomes exhausting instead of peaceful.”
So yeah… that’s the full update.
Some people roasted me in the first post. Some understood me immediately. Some thought I was overreacting. Some thought I was being too soft.
But at the end of the day, nobody truly understands how emotionally draining a relationship can become until they experience living inside that reality themselves.
I stopped reading when you said you gave her another chance.
Oga something that is not in her, is not in her, for the fact that she would start acting on it, proves that she would be faking it, until you marry her, then she would go back to factory setting.
If she had the opportunity, she wouldn't hesitate to throw you under the bus, bros you are a very weak man.
Dogalmighty17: I'm not a supporter of the president but this article is heavy on sensationalism. There is nowhere that chicken is being sold for 40k in Nigeria. No poultry farmer can be that stupid. 9 weeks chicken went for 8500 yesterday in my location. Yes things are bad but let any picture being painted have a basis in reality.
SadiqBabaSani: Smile, all these propaganda doesn't change the fact that Nigerians over 80% of them are dissatisfied with the leadership of the current government and would vote this government out before 12pm on an election day.
Oga, 99.9% of Nigerians are tired of this administration, including the family of the president
FreeStuffsNG: Before they start shouting rigging next year, they should remove the big log of iroko tree in their own eyes first.
Since they already failed to convince their own card-carrying members to vote, they can not convince other Nigerians to vote for their flagbearers niyen.
They had just 1 job to do; give Nigerians credible opposition. They failed woefully at the job.
They are unserious elements.
The food you are cooking, you children will eat it sooner than later.
FreeStuffsNG: The parties have conducted their primaries and elected their flag bearers for 2027 Presidential election slated for January, 2027; less than 8 months away.
The results are clear evidence that the opposition political parties to the ruling All Progressives Congress(APC) are unserious and unprepared despite having 4 long years to give Nigeria's democracy credible opposition, which is the hallmark of democracy.
Nigeria opposition political parties failed woefully. I am so ashamed of them.
I have started thinking that it is the right thing to do for every Nigerian to reject them and all their candidate across board in all the elective offices, not only in presidential poll, to express their disappointment.
Are you as upset as I am?
I am so disappointed in you to believe what transpired in the primaries, even a 3yrs old child knows that APC inflated their figures, of which the video evidence is there.
Election proper is yet to commence, they have started rigging.
Caaz: My sis visited me complaining her husband gave her 5k to prepare food that it's too meagre.
I told her to manage it and whip any meal together so her kids can see what to eat when they return from school...madam kept insisting that the money won't go anywhere.
A family of 4......So in order to teach her how to manage with her husband for the time being since he's a good man....make she nor use her hands push him outside.
I told her to give me the money so I would cook the meal for her.then she can take it home. I insisted on buying everything from outside.
She said there's no way I can cook with less than 5k.
She was even teasing me that we should use one of my bird join the experiment(lolz)
Here are the things I bought from the market Pepper #200 Redoil 300 Melon 450 Maggi #100 Sachet tomato 150 Dried tilapia fish #500 Okpehi 200 A cup of garri 100(for experimental purposes) Spaghetti #1000 Onions #100
If you continue eating like this, you will look malnourished.
SeaTrade: So I just got this truck as man's getting older and practical and I'm loving it,maybe early excitement though,I don't know. Things I noticed: This thing burns a lot of gas,I mean a lot!15.5-15.6L/100km na em dey for dash steady ,used to be 14.3L/100km,don't know why it jumped.
Hard steering ,maybe because it's coming from someone that have been driving sedans for a while now and some CUVs.
Large turning space and poor manoeuvrability,Hilux no follow you manage space oo,you go reverse tire.
Sturdy suspension,you no dey feel anything.
Slow truck,crawls its way up to 170kph and stays there,sucks!
And I get free service for 20,000km or one year whichever comes first from the dealership at no cost.
Car came at 677km
Expensive purchase no doubt but worth it.
You should have gone for the GR Sport, the one with BBL, it looks sexier.
Phone conversation between a lady and a guy negotiating price for a one night stand has got people talking. Gbam, smooth transaction make money enter that’s the important thing 🤷😂 pic.twitter.com/AvIQqavBdr
Amotolongbo: All these ignoramuses who just talk because they are privileged to have sheep cheering them up. Poverty is not measured by the currency value. South Korea is one of the richest countries on earth, yet the South Korean Won has lesser value than naira. South Koreans count in their currency.
Please don't be slow, you want to compare South Korea a country with infrastructure and working institutions to Nigeria?
LocalFARMERS: Kaduna is the major producer of Ginger in the Country. Presently Ginger is scared due to a Ginger disease that affects Ginger farms in Kaduna two years ago. This has made Ginger scarce and extremely expensive.
Fresh Ginger in a black Bako bag is over 100k. A small bag of ginger is over 600k. The farm in this video is in a two plots of land. Which is measuring 100ft by 100ft. This farm at the end of the season will produce over 12 million naira worth of Ginger.
Celebrities › Re: “I’ve Lost Interest In Marriage” – Regina Daniels Opens Up On Relationship Views by Dshocker(m): 10:08pm On May 28
,used to be 14.3L/100km,don't know why it jumped.