₦airaland Forum

Smilenw:
Guess what OP, reading your post's title, I almost thought you were supporting nigerian girls this time and the whole thing was about human trafficking My bad.

lol the guy is consistent sha

too much okpata hin too dey yarn, sha mek I no yab am plenty wen I no sabi sing sef

Tochex101:
I have observed the trend of answering english names as FIRST NAME among many Nigerians and I feel its wrong as we dont even need english names at all.we should be proud of our decent,heritage and culture;let us all do our best to discourage this alien trait in our generation.WE ARE AFRICANS!

^^
sustained . . .

I have always concluded this myself. Our native names are our identity.

@ OP, If your friend was groomed as you narrated then how is "lesbanism in her blood"? did her handler donate blood to her   (smh)

Cuddlemii:
How do you know? Why did you repeat your paragraphs like you are nervous or anxious? Caution!!!

. . . this story sounds wayo

@OP what if a married religious couple eventually backslide . .  does that then mean they should terminate their marriage for lack of spiritual content?

@OP I don't think it's necessarily forbidden (well it could pose as taboo for some cultures I guess) and non existent but the difference doesn't lie in the physical age gap alone but the mental one also. It is likely a single 40 year old woman would be looking for security, marriage, perhaps children etc . . . ideals which may clash with the ambitions of a 20 year old man. Overall it's dependent on the participants but such relationships do occur.

claremont:
Who said a 40 year old woman cannot marry a 20 year old man? 

I tink say one 40 yr old omoge dey hunt for bobo on this site before, you fit enter your subscription nah

. . .sef, mek I kon de flex for dis dance compo sha. . .I no dey gbadun Dbanj before but hin sabi how man go entertain pipo wella. . .

Never - a metrosexual's virility is too compromised for my liking.

[quote author=PAGAN  9JA link=topic=748180.msg9058350#msg9058350 date=1314906819]a mixed child is a lost cause. [/quote]A mixed child has a doubly rich heritage

The natural habitat of love has always been the heart yet is governed by the brain

oh but isn't "Tripoli more livable than Lagos". . . ehen so who no know go know.

odumchi:
Personally, I think the child should take up both. He or she should learn the languages and cultures of both parents. Such a task isnt impossible since I know a few people who are of mixed ethnic origin (Yoruba  father + Igbo mother) and still speak the native languages of both parents fluently and are very well educated baout the customs and traditions of both ethnicities.

I believe many children of such makeup do acquire understanding of both cultures, usually one is more dominant. I think environment will be a very significant factor as well i.e. such a child may have grown up in his/her mother's country and thus adopted more custom from her heritage.

[quote author=PAGAN  9JA link=topic=748180.msg9050960#msg9050960 date=1314828264]a mixed child must not and cannot take the lineage of either. he/she forms thei own category.[/quote]lol like Tiger Woods formed "Cablasian" maybe they should forge their own language also abi

[quote author=Mynd_44 link=topic=749088.msg9053895#msg9053895 date=1314873819]Why would any sane man want two women? One is already trouble enough.[/quote]a "sane man" (who practices trinogamy) can thus opt for one woman and one man or even better two men

claremont:
Some scholars actually posit that Trinogamy now represents the new monogamy

Interesting. . .

It is by far better for me to be in a relationship with 2 ladies who are aware of it being triply beneficial

but what are the benefits of such a relationship sex aside?

in most countries Trinogamy is legal, while polygamy is illegal, and therein lies the key difference. Just thought I will highlight that point.

I believe it's permitted only in the absence of marriage . . .

nassiwa:
May be one partner can supplement on what the other doesn't have. Sharing is not bad.

hmmm. . .I like the term "supplement", I think that's rather appropriate.

Long One:
It might also have to do with ‘putting all your eggs in one basket’.

Just saying, that’s all - before you guys crucify me.

Interesting way at looking at it. However a problem in an ordinary relationship will probably be compounded in a trigonamous one.

If there is a situation where two agrees and one doesn't,  then it may look as if there's two vs one, I think one will sometimes find themselves drawing the short straw at certain occasions.

[center]***[/center]

Personally I don't know how three people could possibly complement each other but maybe trigonamous relationships are primarily supplementary - as one has already indicated.

@OP he is not in a begging position, he's humbling himself.

claremont:
I would love to see the day a lady goes down on her knees begging a man to marry her, it's about time the the roles were reversed.

You have just given feminists and the likes a very long rope with such statement. Very soon some men will demand that their just married wives should carry them over the threshold. Furthermore there are women who kneel and propose to their partner . . *sigh*

[quote author=High_Chief link=topic=749088.msg9051533#msg9051533 date=1314836067]Its greed and selfishness[/quote]I think those elements are a factor whether they be minor or major. . .but then again humans are insatiable beings, perhaps people in such agreement consider such relationship as a solution to those mentioned traits above i.e. a philanderer may just decide to become polygamous or be in an open relationship to neutralize their extracurricular activities (yet I'm thinking they have cleverly legitimised two-timing by making the "other" part of their union) . . .

^^ that one na common ABC, translate wetin again?

What is the purpose of having more than one person in a relationship?. . . .does the second partner complement the first partner i.e. what one partner lacks the other contains?

Is it emotionally exhausting (i.e expending much love) or perhaps emotionally rewarding (i.e two people "loving" you back)?

Is "love" dispensed 100 percent to each lover or is it shared between each partner?

. . .attraction occurs on various planes; some mundane some abnormal.

For me it was the person's stutter and tribal scarification. . .

. . . I'm not even sure if there's more (which I suspect) but these contests pretty much follow the same pattern so why are there so many outlets featuring the same formulaic.

Is the difference found in the the prize/reward of such shows, age groups perhaps etc ? . . . even the titles are of the same mould - if there was a Miss Venus for example I might understand. . .

Beautiful

I am aware that in most cultures the child takes the lineage of the father irrespective of the mothers heritage.

However there are a few cultures that follow the reverse and instead the child's nationality is determined by the mother's background.

Well I began to ponder about those children with duel heritage which clashes. . . i.e if a Ghanaian lady (which I believe takes the maternal side) was to bear a child for a Nigerian man (which gives preeminence to the paternal side) then which nationality does the child then assume?

Also if the scenario was switched around . . thus the mother is Nigerian (which takes the man's lineage) and the father happens to be Ghanaian (which carries the mother's lineage). . . . again I ask which lineage does the child pursue?

Do they (the parents in question) agree with each other upon which lineage the child will follow?

Or do they settle the matter by allowing both cultures to persist in the child?

or are there other options available?

DaRapture:
Most of them here try to blend in with the BA population as much as possible, and will not admit to being Nigerian or African at all, if they can get away with it. This works very well with many of the minority groups in the South East, because they, like the Igbo, often have a very common appearance to that of the general AA population.

How did you come to know that those who apparenly try to "blend in with the BA population" are from the South East?

I'm not among the Diaspora living in America so I guess I wouldn't know that much about how certain groups there conduct themselves.

ChinenyeN:
Which group is your group emofine?

I am Isoko.

Long One:
Yes, because we all live and learn, and gain experience in the process. Experience is also said to be the best teacher.

As you rightly said, some people purposely seek out partners with familiar attributes, which might signify a favourable experience, which they want to relive.

For others however, the experience is far from favourable, and the person’s worst traits are amplified in their mind. This discourages them from associating with people who have similar traits.

As they say ‘you can heal the wound, but not the scar’, the scar serves as a reminder of what happened – not too many people want to experience it again, rather, they prefer ‘something new’ or ‘a breath of fresh air’ (like Jonathan, lol).

. . .neat summary . . lol @ the Jonathan reference.

My experience:-

Often us diasporans at times have a longing to connect with with our beloved nation and so embrace many things pertaining to back home - be it parties/ gathering/ events etc. Yet in these arranged assemblies it appears to be a little more difficult to blend in if you're from a minority group thus it feels as if I am twice removed from my country; one being away from home and two being slightly detached from the diaspora.

I try to mingle with my fellow Nigerians however my differences just serves to isolate me. I have to constantly reiterate to many Nigerians that I also hail from the same country after they erroneously proceed to guess my origin.   
However before I reveal my identity I am treated with caution (sometimes indifference) as a means of being polite as my compatriots regard me as a stranger. After the knowledge that I am also a Nigerian sinks in they automatically communicate with me as one of them. I also feel a little disjointed as the group I hail from is so small and I being raised abroad unfortunately never grew up with any of my people - who are extremely rare to come across in my adopted abode.

I am a Nigerian but because of these differences I somehow feel that my "Nigerianess" is not up to par with some of my peers who hail from large groups and have the comfort of the company and language of their people close by.

I do enjoy being around my fellow Nigerians despite my conspicuous differences which sometimes make me feel more like a foreigner than a compatriot.

Claremont, have you heard the common phrase - "he/she is not my type"?
So I would have guessed that certain stipulations are put in place for some people's requirement - which may have been inspired by previous relationships.

@ MMM very artistic

pleep:
I have never had such a dream  but i would love too.

It's not too late my friend

nassiwa:
Wet dreams are just natural.  A normal man is supposed to through this stage of development. There is nothing like spiritual spouses.

what of women?

M M M:
emofine

pls can i nyash u in your dreams 2 nite without condom

please don't tamper with my dreams! 

I will close by confessing that I believe that there is a reason for everything. The irony behind the introduction of Christianity in Nigeria is one that makes me simultaneously silently sigh and smile as I wonder. . . . .
Today as I walk along the streets of London it is Nigerians that are now spreading that “good news” to the Europeans – although they are not always met with approval and I think to myself why?
Why?
Was it not their ancestors whom allegedly showed us the “light” and today the Nigerians are pleading with them to re-accept that light that they had initially given to us lol abi what is good for the geese is good for the gander . .

So I guess whilst some of the backslidden Europeans got bored the Nigerians “repented”.
Even though I marvel at the way some Nigerians “win souls for Christ” I must admit that the Brits are not the most receptive people even though they are just being offered their original literature back lol.

Now I got that load of my chest, phew. . .I wanted to get some answers from those who managed to endure my post to the very end (thank you for bearing with me)

Are you a Christian or Muslim because your parents are one?

Does the history of the introduction of Christianity and Islam in Nigeria make you re-evaluate the message?

Does the trajectory have no bearing on how you receive "The Word"?

Are some of you Muslim or Christian through finding out your own rites of passage and perhaps thus reached an epiphany?


P.S. Please read carefully and digest pensively before you post.

When I used to read the bible I believed the scriptures to be ambiguous thus one meaning cannot be attached to particular verses. Even in my spiritual immaturity I did reason that there must be something unique about this book.

It has been translated in diverse languages – to be honest there are many bad translations which could thwart throngs of people causing many to be deceived (I will oblige to proffer an example if asked. I have been groomed by the KJV version alone so any deviation to that text [the original translation of the bible into the English language] causes me to be cautious).

I asked myself time and time again why there are so many perversions to an apparently insignificant literature – the most mimicked literature is the Bible. Surely there must be something powerful about this book if people continually pervert the “word of God”.

Then there are so many denominations in Christianity to consider, I truly wonder if the denomination that one is in is affects the believers entry into heaven or at least if whether that particular denomination follows the “straight” and “narrow” pathway “which leadeth unto life”.

As a result all these variables got me so confused. . . *sigh*

[center]-------------------------------------------------------------[/center]

As much as I believe in the importance of spiritualism I do not believe it’s hereditary. I just feel if a child is brought up in a Christian or Muslim home then their faith must have been involuntary even indoctrinated but I guess a parent will never nurture their children in what they believe would not profit their child. However I guess a child could still reject whatever religion their parents are following so consequently it’s up to the individual.
I was raised up in a Christian household and was a “follower” in every sense of the word but I wasn’t a strong “believer”. I used to mimic the mannerisms of the church folks but nobody could fake righteousness so I knew I was a counterfeit and was finally honest with myself and abandoned Christianity because I just didn’t feel compatible with it, not spiritually anyway.

[center]***[/center]