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Family / Re: I Want To Cancel The Marriage Plans. Is It Worth It? by FanRong: 2:16pm On Dec 31, 2023
Badgers14:


No need to rush into marriage. It seems you both have some loose ends to tighten.

Please if you still love her.. if she still checks most of your boxes.

Don't rush the marriage thingy and work things out first to make sure you both are on the same page.

Frankly, I hesitate to say this but I have to. .. from what you wrote her.. I think she might be having double mind getting married to you.

The speed she used to call her ex and the speed the ex showed up sort of throws me off a bit.

So, my suggestion is to have a sit down talk with her and very directly ask her how she feels about your relationship, don't use proverbs etc.. direct talk... ask her how she feels, what's her plan for the future, if she is in with you or wants her ex back..

Either way, you just want to know where she stands and if she decides to move on.. bless her heart..
Similarly, get ready to answer those questions yourself and point out things she does that you don't fancy and areas you want her to improve and your willingness to work with her for the improvement.

you don't want to waste anyone's time or anyone to waste your time or for either of you to be in a unhappy relationship.

Cheers!!
Thanks for your advice.
She checks most of my boxes and that's why I'm so disturbed.
Romance / I Want To Cancel The Marriage Plans. What Do You Think? by FanRong: 12:34am On Dec 30, 2023
I'm sorry, this post is going to be a long one. But you're saving a soul if you read through and advice candidly.


My story
We've dated for 6months and we've lived together for the 6months.

On our 3rd month, I found her interesting and told her I'll like to marry her. She accepted but no engagement ring or anything to show. We just accepted by word of mouth.

Since then, I've worked towards it. I've told her to call her mum and eldest brother(dad is late) to relate my idea and understand their feeling since it won't be that easy to marry. (same state, but my people and her people are highly selective in marriage)

After several persuasion, and threat that I'll throw her out if she doesn't relate the circumstances to her family, she called the mum. And again I had to force her to call the eldest brother. She claimed she did. And that's enough. I'm ok.

Meanwhile, there's this guy(her ex) she claims helped her when she came to Lagos. It was when I started accommodating her that I found out in her chats that she was living with this guy, but lied to me she was living with her Aunt and the aunt's husband was harassing her sexually and she wants to leave. She later told me the guy, though provides for him but has never had sex with her, even when she was living in his house. These stories doesn't move me since everyone, who is not a virgin has an ex. So I forgave all that and we moved on.

She wasn't everything I need in a women, but I told myself I could train her the way I want. We continued adjusting to each others likes and dislikes.

I feed her this 6 months, provide comfortable shelter, buy her things she needs,(not want). Told her I'll do more and open a shop for her, if we get married, but she still confronts me asking why should I wait till after marriage? . I didn't allow the words move me cos Its my decision and my money and also, I'm used to gold diggers.

A good number of times, I see her as being selfish. If things doesn't benefit her, she'll not get bothered even if I'm involved.

Just this week, It became obvious to me that she argues everything I request her to do. From 24th Dec, we've been on holiday, we're always at home.
1. I'll wake her up at 9 and ask her to prepare breakfast for the family, she'll prefer to roll on the bed than do it. I'll finally have to do it myself so I can get things done and get busy.

2. I detest girls on eye lashes. I've repeatedly told her how I dislike it, but when she went to fix herself for the Christmas, she fixed the eyelashes, Contrary to my demand.

3. I got her some sneakers to upgrade her fashion style and look smarter, instead of the usual slippers and sandals she wears.
When we prepared to go to the beach few days ago, I requested her to put on the sneakers to look more fashionable, but she refused buttressing that she must wear what she wants, sandals.

4. Few days ago, we had a heated argument and she said that if I'm not happy that she's living with me, that she can go, afterall, she has somewhere to stay. I asked her to go and she immediately called that her ex bf to come to my house. I immediately swung into action, took all her belongings out, before the ex will arrive, at the same time, retrieving the items I gifted her.
While she was struggling to have her gifted items back, our neighbours heard the struggle and had to come and settle for us. She apologized and I forgave her. we were back into the house.

5. Just yesterday , we left home together, and I locked the door and I took the keys with me. We walked down the street together to the Busstop, I have almost no friend and seldomly greet. But there's this my ex girlfriend by the roadside, she saw me and yelled my name, I went to greet her and my Fiancée picked offence, left me without waiting for me. After that I chased her and told her it's nothing because I've told her everything about this ex.
Before we could get to the Busstop, she demanded for the house keys and I gave her since she might come back earlier than me.
We couldn't say bye. The anger was clear on her face and we parted ways.

After about 15mins, I got to where I wanted to make payment for the items I picked only to notice I am not with my transaction phone. I was confused where could I have kept it, the seller insisted I may not have come to his shop with the phone, and the phone rang as I called with my second phone. so I had to call my Fiancée for assistance since she's with the keys.
At first, she said she was still around the Busstop but when I told her I needed her to go home and confirm my phones whereabout, she said she can't go back that she has gone far, shouted on me and hung the phone.

I called and called and called, but she didn't pick. Many thoughts ran into me. Who took this phone? My money? , my phone? , my sim card? . I had to find my way and trekked back about 4km to the house since I had no cash with me. And finally saw the phone ringing in my house. I was relieved.

The way she shouted to me on the phone got me unbalanced, I felt she would be fire if I get this girl as a wife.

We finally traveled to our home state today and I paid the bills for the traveling. My major plan of traveling was to see her people and do the needful before I mistakenly get her pregnant. But I'm seriously contemplating of canceling this plan and throw her out come January. I need peace.

Dear nairalanders, I'm really in the middle of the deep blue sea and the devil.

I need mature and candid advice please.
Should I continue with the marriage plans or the red flags are obvious?

6 Likes 1 Share

Family / I Want To Cancel The Marriage Plans. Is It Worth It? by FanRong: 12:21am On Dec 30, 2023
I'm sorry, this post is going to be a long one. But you're saving a soul if you read through and advice candidly.


My story
We've dated for 6months and we've lived together for the 6months.

On our 3rd month, I found her interesting and told her I'll like to marry her. She accepted but no engagement ring or anything to show. We just accepted by word of mouth.

Since then, I've worked towards it. I've told her to call her mum and eldest brother(dad is late) to relate my idea and understand their feeling since it won't be that easy to marry. (same state, but my people and her people are highly selective in marriage)

After several persuasion, and threat that I'll throw her out if she doesn't relate the circumstances to her family, she called the mum. And again I had to force her to call the eldest brother. She claimed she did. And that's enough. I'm ok.

Meanwhile, there's this guy(her ex) she claims helped her when she came to Lagos. It was when I started accommodating her that I found out in her chats that she was living with this guy, but lied to me she was living with her Aunt and the aunt's husband was harassing her sexually and she wants to leave. She later told me the guy, though provides for him but has never had sex with her, even when she was living in his house. These stories doesn't move me since everyone, who is not a virgin has an ex. So I forgave all that and we moved on.

She wasn't everything I need in a women, but I told myself I could train her the way I want. We continued adjusting to each others likes and dislikes.

I feed her this 6 months, provide comfortable shelter, buy her things she needs,(not want). Told her I'll do more and open a shop for her, if we get married, but she still confronts me asking why should I wait till after marriage? . I didn't allow the words move me cos Its my decision and my money and also, I'm used to gold diggers.

A good number of times, I see her as being selfish. If things doesn't benefit her, she'll not get bothered even if I'm involved.

Just this week, It became obvious to me that she argues everything I request her to do. From 24th Dec, we've been on holiday, we're always at home.
1. I'll wake her up at 9 and ask her to prepare breakfast for the family, she'll prefer to roll on the bed than do it. I'll finally have to do it myself so I can get things done and get busy.

2. I detest girls on eye lashes. I've repeatedly told her how I dislike it, but when she went to fix herself for the Christmas, she fixed the eyelashes, Contrary to my demand.

3. I got her some sneakers to upgrade her fashion style and look smarter, instead of the usual slippers and sandals she wears.
When we prepared to go to the beach few days ago, I requested her to put on the sneakers to look more fashionable, but she refused buttressing that she must wear what she wants, sandals.

4. Few days ago, we had a heated argument and she said that if I'm not happy that she's living with me, that she can go, afterall, she has somewhere to stay. I asked her to go and she immediately called that her ex bf to come to my house. I immediately swung into action, took all her belongings out, before the ex will arrive, at the same time, retrieving the items I gifted her.
While she was struggling to have her gifted items back, our neighbours heard the struggle and had to come and settle for us. She apologized and I forgave her. we were back into the house.

5. Just yesterday , we left home together, and I locked the door and I took the keys with me. We walked down the street together to the Busstop, I have almost no friend and seldomly greet. But there's this my ex girlfriend by the roadside, she saw me and yelled my name, I went to greet her and my Fiancée picked offence, left me without waiting for me. After that I chased her and told her it's nothing because I've told her everything about this ex.
Before we could get to the Busstop, she demanded for the house keys and I gave her since she might come back earlier than me.
We couldn't say bye. The anger was clear on her face and we parted ways.

After about 15mins, I got to where I wanted to make payment for the items I picked only to notice I am not with my transaction phone. I was confused where could I have kept it, the seller insisted I may not have come to his shop with the phone, and the phone rang as I called with my second phone. so I had to call my Fiancée for assistance since she's with the keys.
At first, she said she was still around the Busstop but when I told her I needed her to go home and confirm my phones whereabout, she said she can't go back that she has gone far, shouted on me and hung the phone.

I called and called and called, but she didn't pick. Many thoughts ran into me. Who took this phone? My money? , my phone? , my sim card? . I had to find my way and trekked back about 4km to the house since I had no cash with me. And finally saw the phone ringing in my house. I was relieved.

The way she shouted to me on the phone got me unbalanced, I felt she would be fire if I get this girl as a wife.

We finally traveled to our home state today and I paid the bills for the traveling. My major plan of traveling was to see her people and do the needful before I mistakenly get her pregnant. But I'm seriously contemplating of canceling this plan and throw her out come January. I need peace.

Dear nairalanders, I'm really in the middle of the deep blue sea and the devil.

I need mature and candid advice please.
Should I continue with the marriage plans or the redflags are obvious?

49 Likes 1 Share

Travel / Re: Flood Kills Mother Of Five In Anambra (Disturbing Photo) by FanRong: 10:20pm On Jun 09, 2023
Skiborobo:

What was the former-former and present governor of the state doing? Is this where a president wants to come out from?
I opened to check this kind of comment and u didn't disappoint. Not even a respect for the dead.

1 Like

Programming / Re: Sam Altman Visits Nigeria On AI Tour by FanRong: 9:59am On May 20, 2023
foolbuster:
Lolz. Una dey happy he came to visit Nigeria abi? What some people fail to realize is that many people are gonna lose their jobs to AI.
We heard that when GSM came to Nigeria.

1 Like 1 Share

Food / Re: 20 Things About Hilda And Her Guinness World Record Marathon Cooking Attempt by FanRong: 5:02pm On May 14, 2023
Odogwuzack:
Wow... She must be provided with necessary help plsss.

SS lady... Thank God she's not Igbo. We won't have to deal with "we won Guiness record for Nigeria" and other unnecessary noise.
Your hatred is spicy. I pity your heart

1 Like

Politics / Re: Governor Sanwo-Olu Meets Hilda Baci (Photos) by FanRong: 4:53pm On May 14, 2023
seunmsg:
Tinubu joined online to show support and Sanwo-Olu went to the venue to physically show support. Leadership!

They both showed support without making it about politics. The tiny voice and opportunistic mandate thief will soon appear on Twitter to link Hilda Baci’s attempt to break the Guinness World Record to his dead presidential ambition.
Your hatred is spicy. I pity your heart.

1 Like

Romance / Re: A Chat That Caused Mixed Reactions Between Men & Women Online by FanRong: 8:55am On Apr 27, 2023
OvertheTop:


Let me Guess...
You sent 5K to prove a Point! grin grin grin grin
She's a local Olosho.
I played along that i already sent it till she got tired.
I later used the 3k same evening to chop peppersoup and 2 beer. There's no free money anywhere.

1 Like

Romance / Re: A Chat That Caused Mixed Reactions Between Men & Women Online by FanRong: 6:59pm On Apr 26, 2023
I came late. I have one here.
Its everywhere. Once you tell a girl that you like her, you're owing her money but u don't know.

4 Likes

Romance / Re: Foreign Lady Gives Her Fellow Ladies 5 Tips On Marrying A Nigerian Man (Video by FanRong: 6:52pm On Apr 26, 2023
Zonefree:
Nigerian men be giving ladies all of the world sleepless nights. Seems we're like the air they breathe.

An average Nigeria man is a full spec. If you think otherwise, go to court.

Not all Nigerian men. Attach Southern Nigeria for clarity sake.
Politics / Evacuating Nigerians From Sudan by FanRong: 5:02pm On Apr 24, 2023
Allen Onyema is from Ihiala in Anambra state which means he is an Igbo man and by extension an IPOB man.

Adam Garba and Bashir Ahmed, an SA to Buhari, led a Northern attack against Peter Obi and his Igbo brothers on Twitter. They vowed that the Igbos will never rule Nigeria cos they are IPOB people.

Please they should educate their people caught in the Sudan war never to enter the plane because Air Peace is an IPOB plane 😁😁😁

What's your thought?

Sports / Re: Saida Mouh: I’m Unaware’, Hakimi’s Mother Reacts To Son’s Fortune In Her Name by FanRong: 10:34pm On Apr 20, 2023
ivolt:

Dont tell me you are this gullible.
You claimed a wife requested for 50% without any evidence and you still won't
take correction.

I even offered to give one of your types monetary reward since 3 days ago.
He still couldn't find any.
Next time think with your head before you jump onto a fake news trend.
this your comment is a well taught out material for the TRASH can.
Sports / Re: Saida Mouh: I’m Unaware’, Hakimi’s Mother Reacts To Son’s Fortune In Her Name by FanRong: 9:57pm On Apr 20, 2023
ivolt:

Can you post the court papers showing the 50%?
Can you post the court papers showing where the 50% wasn't stated?
Sports / Re: Saida Mouh: I’m Unaware’, Hakimi’s Mother Reacts To Son’s Fortune In Her Name by FanRong: 2:45pm On Apr 20, 2023
How a wife filed for divorce, requesting for 50% wealth, in a 3 year marriage makes me understand why serpent met the woman instead of the man.
She actually don't have comprehension sense.

543 Likes 38 Shares

Business / Re: Fire Guts Olowu Spare Parts Market In Lagos by FanRong: 7:14pm On Mar 30, 2023
Davido confirms he's married to Chioma.
The rich Yorubas are busy marrying Igbo women and embracing Igbos with business and so many other good things, while the poor ones are busy shouting go back to your state.

And you wonder why they remain desolate , this is the answer...
Romance / Re: Are You In Relationship For Sex Or To Build by FanRong: 12:21pm On Mar 27, 2023
Wordsfrombimpe:
Happy birthday In advance

Are you kidneying me?
Romance / Re: Are You In Relationship For Sex Or To Build by FanRong: 8:24pm On Mar 26, 2023
Omo, mine is for build. I'm building skyscraper like this. I should be in thirty something floor now. Finally na for the pent house i go live.

2 Likes 1 Share

Crime / Re: Any Person Who Unlawfully Kills An Animal Is Liable To Imprisonment- SP Hundeyin by FanRong: 6:27pm On Mar 25, 2023
Omoawoke:
angry

obidients, any fake news today?

Abeg drop one fake news make boys use hold body.

Did Biden disguise as Bin laden to hold secret meeting with Obi? or did Putin disguise as stripper to meet Tinubu dressed as hunter grin

Obedients fit kill person grin
If not that this is nairaland , i for call you Afornja.
Crime / Re: Any Person Who Unlawfully Kills An Animal Is Liable To Imprisonment- SP Hundeyin by FanRong: 6:25pm On Mar 25, 2023
Thats to say those guys working in Abbatoir that kills cows has reserved life imprisonment for their tenth generation.

Omo!

1 Like

Business / Re: Disturbing Pictures From Nigeria Commercial Bank Halls (photos) by FanRong: 7:50pm On Mar 24, 2023
lhordspy:
But Peter Obi, you guys Messiah said the policy was okay and perfect. And i remember so well you all celebrated every letter that made up those words of his, back then because you thought it would affect Tinubu. You even praised Emefiele and cheered him on to 'walk and never stumble'

All of a sudden election is over. Eyes don open. Zombidients are now crying for cash. Go and meet your messiah, Peter obi; the one who misled you.

Are you people not 'reaping gain again'?
Campaign after election.
What's your purpose, if i may ask?
Sports / Re: Lionel Messi Scores 800th Career Goal In Argentina Win Over Panama by FanRong: 12:33pm On Mar 24, 2023
Georgejeez:
Lemme see how Messi will not win his 8th Balon d'Or this year .

Mind you, a free kick goal against Panama in a friendly is equivalent to 32 goals scored in the Saudi Arabian league...
Small fight, you carry granade grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin

25 Likes 2 Shares

Sports / Re: Lionel Messi Scores 800th Career Goal In Argentina Win Over Panama by FanRong: 12:32pm On Mar 24, 2023
G O A T

2 Likes

Politics / Re: No Clandestine Meeting Between CJN Ariwoola & President-Elect Tinubu - Onanuga by FanRong: 10:57am On Mar 24, 2023
yarimo:
99.9 % of labour party members and it supporters are fools
Stealing the village drum is easy but finding a place to beat it quietly is the problem.
~ African proverb

I would have called you Arfonja but I won't.
Continue. Another person will. Not me
Politics / Re: BREAKING: Peter Obi Dumps Christianity For Islam (picture) by FanRong: 11:49am On Mar 21, 2023
Inside life

Politics / Re: Fintiri Defeats Binani In Adamawa Governorship Election by FanRong: 10:17pm On Mar 20, 2023
Jackson105:
Ipob fools will not shout Rigging here o, but let it be APC, they will start shouting rigging

Where is Asgard?

Politics / Re: How Many Labour Party Governors Do We Have Now In Nigeria? by FanRong: 9:48pm On Mar 20, 2023
Why is noone celebrating the results so far?

1 Like

Politics / Re: Update On Kaduna State Governorship Results (2023) by FanRong: 11:19am On Mar 20, 2023
burp18:
Not nairalanders. Deluded Obidients 😁

3 Likes

Politics / Re: Death Threats Won’t Deter Me - REC, Olusegun Agbaje Warns Politicians by FanRong: 11:16am On Mar 20, 2023
Babaibe:

This was the voting style in Enugu yesterday. You can not vote any party aside LP. Igbo disenfranchising fellow igbo for political gain using Inec. Yet, the bittered tribe is invading other region. Vote Kolawole Lamidi nWeke as governor in any of your eastern state, then Chinedu Gbadebo should come and re-contest in Lagos. I think Lagos government must decentralize this igbos, they are torn in our flesh and we need to show them where they belong. Lagos is not Onitisha,Aba or nsukka.

https://twitter.com/Yemi__Ajayi/status/1637038378041393153?t=ovoQ_iEnolSp6GnFfF9ASQ&s=08
Na you go decentralize, na you go still cry. Erudite Skulla. See image below

Politics / Re: Final Results Of 2023 Governorship Elections So Far Across States by FanRong: 11:15am On Mar 20, 2023
SkrewYou:
Moderators, pls stop hiding my comment, stop it!!! You can't disenfranchise me online & offline. Alot of hate, xenophobic, ethnic profiling & character assassination threads litters this forum, you don't hide or delete them. Countless Bigotry on the comment section are allowed to stay, but you delete/hide my comment because I am saying the truth?

Let me re-type My deleted comment

The poorest poverty region of the poverty capital of the world has refused to free themselves & emancipate themselves from slavery & ethno-religious politics. They've vowed to remain in an abusive relationship with APC who's political ideology can be liken to an abusive partner in an abusive relationship who only remember them when they've "erection" just to satisfy their urge & leave the abused partner to nurse her wound & treat her STDs/STIs, then return again when he has another "erection". Rinse & repeat

Pls, what is wrong with this comment compared to the once above.
There's a moderator that's bent on deleting comments that speaks the truth.
See this one below.

On the Lagos Guber Election,
The contest is between two Yoruba contestants from two different parties.
Of course the Igbo people in Lagos has the right to vote for one of them. LP has been proven not to be an Igbo party, neither is APC a Yoruba party.

So, what is this question about “is Lagos an Igbo land?” Is Gbadebo or Jandore Igbo men. Frankly, I can no longer understand the reasoning of the Yoruba folks...
are u sure they still have oil in their heads?

The so called moderator deleted a post like this on pretense that its spamming the forum.
That mod must be an Erudite Skulla.

1 Like

Politics / Re: Death Threats Won’t Deter Me - REC, Olusegun Agbaje Warns Politicians by FanRong: 11:00am On Mar 20, 2023
lapintoz:

We are not saying they are not fit to be Gov. Our preference is Sanwolu. Not the Gov that will be elected by IPOB pigs. Of course you are free to vote for your choice....but why not keep that to yourself rather than claim you want to take over Lagos. Lagos is your own. Bla bla bla bla

Well the real owners of lagos have spoken. Sanwo Eko is our man. Check the result very well.

Maybe you should concentrate more on who govern the 5 or 6 South Eastern state so you can retire well back to your state. After your sojourn all over the country



Politics / Re: Death Threats Won’t Deter Me - REC, Olusegun Agbaje Warns Politicians by FanRong: 10:58am On Mar 20, 2023
Babaibe:

Chinedu Gbadebo is igbo and not a full breed Yoruba man. He marred Jandor chances when he used power and igbo connection to take a mandate that does not belong to him. Agbaje won LP primary, but how come Chinedu Gbadebo became the party flag bearer. LP is igbo party in this election, they betrayed their conservative PDP and APGA to follow LP because of Peter Obi, a chronic liar. Check the least of people contesting for state house under LP, then you will see Olawale Chukwu Arinze, people of other tribes adopting Yoruba name for their selfish reasons and gain. I maintained that voting an igbo man in Lagos or Yoruba man is not a big deal, but you as Igbo tell your people to lead by example by voting a Yoruba into state house in any of the five eastern state. We are pleased with our government, of course they have their lapses, but they are better than all nonsense leadership in the east. Yet, igbo will not create trouble and violence in their state, but Lagos and other megacities.

Politics / Re: Death Threats Won’t Deter Me - REC, Olusegun Agbaje Warns Politicians by FanRong: 8:49am On Mar 20, 2023
ronalmagic10:



You're allowed to wail. It's your right but try and eat good food first

You're not better than those that died in izu river. If you die on empty stomach no one will remember you

Just eat, rest, check your BP then come back to cry

It's too early now

1 Like

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