₦airaland Forum

Zonacom:
So stout is not beer abi? We have two classes of beers. Stout and Lager

My brother... Stout is not Beer, in our Nigerian market. Loll

But is a type of Beer in the Dictionary

Ezege

And d head was at the VIP SECTION.

LOL

What's wrong with this EXECUTIVE?

Madrid hold on ooo.

Don't break my heart.

Give that ticket to Nuhu Ribadu...

Or is he still in the APC?

Good

All shades of black and bold

Ha

Lol

Hahahaha... I see

This is Arguably the best maternity shoot ever.

Classic I must say

[quote author=brightlinse post=66532045][/quote]Then u should confront your priest, ask him questions, or through the Council of laity Chanel ur grievances to the next Diocesan Synod. Cos if what you said is true, then your parish priest is in error, and needs to be called to order.

If it's Nnewi Diocese, you'll be welcomed to Oraifite 2018 Synod.

Geesaintagape:
Nice talk 100% truth.
Anglican church okwe asaba does not wed who does not pay tithe .
I have questioned d biblical backing no answer answer yet

Bro, you are not sure of what u just typed... I don't blame you too for thinking that, because that is probably what you have been made to believe.

The Anglicans in Nigeria(the one I'm sure of) don't record tithes. The church doesn't know who pays and who doesn't pay.

What she records is Stewardship, and it is a free will cash paid to your parish, that identifies you to be a member.

NB: A lot of people think this stewardship is actually tithe, because they are actually collected same time during church service. The Sunday Matins conductor announces them same time and two collection boxes are dropped one is for tithe(which the priest will usually advice you to do, but not compel u) and the other Stewardhip(which is recorded, and considered important, but must be a free will contribution and not one tenth)

Pls do well to ask your priest questions or attend Friday classes if you are an Anglican so you can ask the Elders of your parish. As an Anglican do well to attend the Friday classes, that is where the church traditions, 39 Articles of Anglican Faith and Anglicanisn are taught and questions on important issues discussed for the growth of the church.

Thank u

Kudos

Happy married life UJUNWA.

My classmate those days in Our Lords'.

Make I hear say na mụ a ga-abịa be Ekpelinwa dat day.

Lol

I think say this one dey visit naija...

Ọga Dumelo, what would you now say about our dear Nigeria

I'm in the stadium now as I type, for the Akwa Ibom Youth Sports Festival.

Have been to Tropicana, Ibom Plaza...

Seems like that your number one will be my next stop.

Finally Uyo sweet.

Karma is a bitch.

In 2011 it was ndị ahụ tiri fada ihe, ha agaghịkwa achị ọzọ.

Now it is even graver... Archbishop for that matter.

If Churches Were Human Beings.

Catholic:
First son of his mother. Everyone know this yet he likes to rub it on our faces, with all his experience in the world, he still can't hold his shit together. Let his siblings override him, insult him and even bully him. He makes laws on behalf of his parents yet he doesn't abide by these laws. He thinks he's the pride of his parents, he thinks his parents loves him the most, he looks down on his siblings. He had the respect of his siblings but lost it.

Anglican:
Second son of his mother or so he thinks. Behaves like an old man. Always in constant struggle with his eldest brother, very stubborn and does breaks most laws his eldest brother makes. Leader of the rebellion against his brother. Believes what his elder brother can get from the father, he and others can get too. Dresses in same manner with his elder brother.

Presbyterian:
Coy son. Quiet, reserved. The family issue doesn't really concern him. Most times he's backing his second brother against his first. Most times he stands for his eldest brother, he's on the fence most times.

Lord's Chosen:
Black sheep of the family. Glaring mistake, his mother recently told the family she regrets not aborting him. He constantly brings disgrace upon the family. Very stubborn and naive, straight minded. To him, if it's not this it can't be this. And to add, very dirty.

Christ Embassy:
Slay queen in capital letters. Constant headache for the dad. Dresses provocatively. The family is in constant fear that she doesn't get pregnant. To her, nude is the new fashion. Tattoo all over body, she recently started smoking. Number two black sheep of the family.

RCCG:
Beautiful girl. Well behaved, cultured. Envy of the town, role model to younger girls, her failings is her temper, gets angry easily. Her temper can boil egg, she talks carelessly when angry, she tries as much as possible to control her anger issues. She's always in confrontation with her younger sister due to her lifestyle.

Deeper Life:
Slow water run fast. Pretender does the worst. Anyone who looks at her would think she can't hurt a fly. She carries herself as if her feet doesn't touch the ground. Thinks highly of herself. Her black sheep attribute is yet to be discovered.

AG:
More like her sister. Very calculative before she considers an option. Stubborn. She prides herself as the most loved of her parents much to the chagrin of her siblings. She dey do like she nor dey shit.

Winners Chapel:
Slay queen in small letters. Sometimes dresses decent, sometimes indecency is her calling. She understands her sister(RCCG) more that any of her siblings. Her parents fear her sister is influencing her.

Jehovah Witness:
Holier than thou brother. Very secretive and stubborn. Talk less, act more, wicked in a way. All his siblings pray not to cross his way. He hardly forgives, he must pay you back in your own coin.

Latter Day Saint:
Clean, sparkling clean. He is always neat. Talk in whispers and counts his words and steps. No one knows what he's thinking, got a serial killer look. Salvation Ministries:
Up to fashion man, his dress sense is second to none. He has the girls in the neighborhood in his pocket. Fears abound that he might actually be responsible for pregnancies in the neighborhood.

Mountain of fire:
Loudest son of the family. When eating he's shouting. When bathing he's singing at the top of his voice. He can't whisper. Always shouting people names. They took him to hospital to check if he's okay, cause he acts like he's crazy. Maybe he is actually crazy

Sabbath:
Always dreaming and seeing visions. She could be talking with someone and fall into a trance. She always has a prophesy or two for every happening in the house, if a spoon is missing, she will have a prophecy to that effect.

I am..... Asoegwu Kingsley.
#fearless.

RIP fallen Soldier.

Whoever did the writeup for the poster... Sure is a poetic genius. More ink to your pen.

If Cities in Nigeria were Human Beings.

Abuja:
That rich girl whose father is the source of her finance. She has connections in high places and that British accent. She's classy, beautiful with heavy make up on. She has all the latest gadgets is town, iPhone and all. Did I forget to add she attended the most expensive private university in the country? Well now you know. To add again, she's hot.

Lagos:
Handsome face, body with abs and all. Self employed, lives alone and owns a car. He's dating the Abuja girl. He's the only one who humbles her. He's a thug in a suit. Sometimes he goes crazy like them traffic on the mainland, one needs to be crazy in Lagos to survive and he's the perfect fit. His Abuja girlfriend gives him money now and again even if he doesn't want it.

Port Harcourt:
That crazy girl, smoking and all, sniffing even. She lives for clubbing. Every Friday night has her performing on the stage. She's the envy of the compound, no one really know what she does, she goes out in the evening and returns early in the morning. She owns plots and plots of land, heard she's building a house somewhere.

Benin:
We all have that one student in the class who passes his exams without reading right? Yeah. This is him right here. This guy just rakes in the A's and B's. He actually does his things mostly in the spiritual. He's always quiet in class but very vocal in the spiritual realm. Days before the exam begins, he just disappears and comes back. In the exam hall he sits and just stares. End of the semester, he'll be top of his class. How he does it? No one knows. His fellow spiritual people know right?

Onitsha:
Very rich guy, married and living well. Women, Hero (beer) are his worst fears. He believes in the motivational talk that says "face your fears". So he faces his fears with all his strength. Every Sunday has him in one hotel with a girl and a bottle of his favourite Hero. He despises those who are educated, not like he knows money rules the world, it's his god in a way. He has this natural hate for his English speaking kinsmen. The only English words he's used to are "container" "high sea" "goods" "money" "baby".

Asaba:
Across the Niger is his neighbour. Very quiet and calculative A typical guy man. He lives off women, like he's practically the sugar boy, he dispenses sugar to older women, they cloth, feed him. His Onitsha neighbour hate his lifestyle. He spends all his time on his laptop one sugar mummy bought for him. Spends most days in a hotel room than in his house. He's constantly on the look out for the law or husbands of his sugar mummies. He's handsome I forgot to add.

Nnewi:
Onitsha kinsman. Not the English speaking kinsman o, Onitsha loves this one with passion. Nnewi has a loud mouth. Just because he sells tyres and machine parts he thinks he has monopoly over the girls. Onitsha always warn him to stay away from his girls. Nnewi loves English but the only grammar he speaks is "baby I rove you die""baby I rove you pass my mama". He doesn't joke with food. Beer is for Onitsha as food is to Nnewi. Brothers from different mums.

Owerri:
Lazy girl. Work she nor gree. Her assets is her office. She is a walking mobile office. Anyhow you want it she'll give it to you. Name one hotel in Nigeria that she doesn't know. She smells money from a mile, she has the uncanny ability to see inside your pocket, taking a glance at you she can calculate your account balance. She's mysterious. Fake ass, fake accent mixed with a little owerri igbo, fake boobs, block head. Her sister is currently in knacking one boy in BBNaija.

Awka:
Wannabe. She wants to be like Owerri. She just started going to hotels, not that someone takes her there, she just goes and sits there waiting for customers. I guess she can't be like Owerri. Onitsha likes her, Nnewi too.

Enugu:
Cool man, fine man, but old man. Old man who doesn't believe he's old. He believes in the forever young shit. He almost broke his back trying to please Owerri. Yes, he's a sugar daddy too and he loves music. Something with the 042 shii he screams now and again.

Aba:
Humble man, smelling mouth, body odour, unkempt but rich. With all his money he can't even get a proper haircut, good clothes and buy common 500niara body spray. Tueh! Maybe he's stingy.

Umuahia:
Young man. Envy of his brother Aba. Clean and cultured. Intelligent and educated too but broke. No work after years and years of graduating from school. Aba like yabbing him, "school and no money, you're a dead man"

Abakiliki:
Local man. He's comfortable with his local thought and makes no effort to change. When he left our compound, he had no idea of the latest stuffs in the world. I just heard he got a new girl who is exposing him to the happenings in the world. Abakiliki is no more local o.

Calabar:
Come one, come all. Can you do? She once asked a guy after the guy must have bragged how many hours he can go "do you want to do before you eat or you want to eat before you do?" no one can actually remember which option the guy choose but what happened was, we carried the guys dead body out of her room the next morning. Slay queen in bedmatics. She divides and conquer like Moses. Nuff said. I forgot to add, she likes people husband.

Uyo:
Half sister of Calabar. Also has the bedmatics prowess but not like her half sister. What she has that her half sister doesn't have is her beauty without brain. Very local but forming uptown, village girl forming funky.

Warri:
Warri, Warri, Warri, dem go hear am na. This guy don mad. Weed and monkey tail don finish him life. Warri cannot talk without raising his voice. I wonder how he his wife tolerates him. Warri would see you and shout your name from a mile. Warri get problem abeg. Warri nor dey carry last, who ask you? Abeg shift.

Bayelsa:
Fowl that lays the golden egg but nobody dey look him face. His dad is very rich but Bayelsa is poor, how? Riches around him but he still begs for garri, more like someone who lives close to the river but uses spittle to wash his hands.

Benue:
All say ikonka, say Benue yam!. Say it again, Benue yam! Shey you heard that one guy killed one girl? He didn't poison her o, he just had sex with her. Once his Benue yam went in, she dropped dead fam, just dead. That Benue yam dangling between his legs don put am for many wahala. If his Benue yam jam Calabar waist, e go red o!.

Jos:
Who's cold hearted like this guy? Very cold. Can date 5 girls at once and break up with them all in a day. He once told a girl it over on her sick bed. She died from heart break the following day. Cold Jos, I won't be you, never!.

Kogi:
This guy like fight pass quarrel. When he parked into our area, Kogi didn't take long to engage in his first fight with the street thugs, he's currently king of the streets now. His body is filled with scars. Very ugly guy.

Ibadan:
The wrong type of girl. Very traditional. She once took amala and ewedu to cinema. She jarzed her boyfriend and trapped the poor man in a bottle. Tribal marks all over her body. Her statement starts in yourba, mixes up accidentally with English and ends in yourba.

Ogun:
This one get mouth. He loves bragging, more like shouting. Small quarrel he will pull shirt like he can fight. "Ogun kee you there" "I'll send thunder to kill your grandfather"

Borno:
He'll bomb you. He'll bomb anyone you've ever said "good morning" to. He'll track you and bomb you don't just make him angry. He doesn't speak much.

Kastina:
Intelligent but religiously held back. Religion clouds his intelligent mind. He passed though school but school didn't pass through him.

Kaduna:
Rich and famous. He practices two religions. They are in constant conflict of who will control him.

Sokoto:
He's that crazy neighbour screaming "No to the infidels". Turbans and all, traditional man, perfect for for Ibadan.

Kano:
Very rich parents, educated but religiously spoilt. He loves gold and the Quran. He's handsome, rich, tall and Allah fearing. Every girls dream.

As written by Asoegwu Kingsley
#fearless.

Ego rie nsị

E be like say this blame game never do APC

Na wao

Isi Zik= #500(in Igbo)

A Priest of God in Anambra is set to run for the Federal House of Representatives in the 2019 General election.

The priest is seeking to represent the good people of Anambra East and West Federal Constituency in the Green chamber.

The priest whose name is Revd. Edwin Okechukwu, studied in the University of South Africa, after completing his secondary education at the Bishop Ụzọdike Memorial Seminary, Nnewi. And in consonance with the motto of his secondary school Alma mater, he is Alive Unto God and ready to represent his people selflessly.

Edwin is a priest of the Anglican Church, and have been a great Critic government officials and believes that the best way to help is to get in.

If you think the animal swallowing money game will stop, you better wake up...

They are covered, after all their brother the EAGLE(@EFCC) is the one supposed to hunt them... And like our presido is treating his Fulani brothers, shall their brother treat them.

Meanwhile, I saw in my dream where one horse that has always had his legs ready to run, finally running. Yes ooo, it was running with all the money in the white and blue building.

Union Homes/Bank customers are you there?

I NEED YOUR OPINION PLS

A Christian sister got pregnant and the Church decided to discipline her since she was not married.

When the elders of the Church met and interviewed her, she told them that she has stayed and remained in the Church for several years and no one is marrying her and she is fast approaching the age of menopause where she can't get pregnant even if married.

So after reading some Christian medical journals on this issues, she decided and did artificial insemination since she too wants a child. She tendered both the medical journals and the medical documents that showed that she has done the artificial insemination from a reputable Christian hospital.

The Sister is pregnant without committing fornication nor adultery with any man.

NOW THE QUESTION IS, COULD THIS BE A SIN?

Kindly give your reasons for your answer and if possible back it with Scripture, so that we can learn. You may wish to send to your Christian friends and see their position on the matter.

What's your position?

Igbo Amaka n'ezie.

Ọhaneze na ndị ọchịchị na ngalaba niile kwesịrị ibu ụzọ mee ka ha si agwa anyị ka anyị na-eme.

Ọ bụ ihe arụ na ìgwè obodo ga-awa ji na emume Ufijioku(Iri ji) na asụsụ ndị ofesi... A na m afụkwa zi ndị Obu ọfọ ji kwa zi asụsụ ndị ofesi(bekee) agọzi ọfọ... Tụfịakwa.

Okeke nwanyị dị nụ ntị njọ ooo... K'anyị chigharia nụ, ma hapụ ife bere n'abalị ka ọbụlu anwụnta.

Ta bụ Gbo! Osita dị ba mma? Ọ dibara gboo oo!


Dalụ nụ Igbo ndị nwe m.

Lolll

Since everyone is being creative to see another meaning of Nigeria, let me quickly say that in Igbo Nigeria (N'ayị Je ịrịa) means 'We will surely suffer'