₦airaland Forum

Cockanfanta:
I don't love her. I can't even love any girl, it like a sin. I just use relationships as a tool.

Rolly22:
That's why it's not good to allow your emotions to lead you, it would put you in Trouble.

totalgreen01:
hi,
what kind of packs re u looking for

Roland17:
This sort of grief is suffered by those who hold themselves in very high moral and value standards, consequently, you are in shock that you drifted too far from your values and the result is living with you daily. Now, the moral may be specific or general. In your case, it seems to be faithfulness/ loyalty to your wife. This sort of standard may not be associated with your religious beliefs because those have forgiveness or cultural values but personal values that took you years to build and they are like your pride. While there is the trauma associated with the guilt of the pain you caused your wife, you have failed to realize that your wife has forgiven you and has moved on because you are primarily focused on the fact that you have failed yourself.

Sometimes this sort of grief can be self-destructive and selfish and this is buttressed by the fact that you have even considered separation from your family. There are stages of relieving guilt and it does sound like you have skipped some of them and now you are struggling with moving past that incident. Genuine forgiveness of any sorts starts with yourself, it is the highest form of self-judgment, accountability, and realization and this is because getting forgiveness from the person hurt does not necessarily absolve you from your own conscience (for those who still have one oh), it only assures a temporal peace of mind. I think you spent the early stages of this incident fighting to secure your wife's forgiveness which is very important to gain and now that you have gotten it, you realize there is a gaping hole that harbors a demon that you should have closed first.

I am very surprised that the therapists you are seeing have not divulged this critical piece to you. The journey to self reconciliation can only be completed by you alone and not your wife/ family because she has done the most important part which is to forgive you wholeheartedly. If you rely on your family to push you through this face, you would only end up condemning yourself, even more, and burden your family with the responsibility of helping you through this dark phase. You need to start the cycle again and this time with a clearer perspective and good knowledge of the past. Let me also say that reassurances from your wife without self reconciliation will only fuel the self-guilt even more and you may end up drifting again ( I know! it sounds crazy but it is the truth).

What you are feeling right now is the denial stage which should have been the first stage of the journey to self-forgiveness. While you accept the action, you are almost questioning the fact that you did it and there is nothing wrong in this stage. After this stage, retrace the history of how much effort you put in your yourself (your biological family, your growing up, your challenges and how they made you the man you are today) and your family and let the anger consume you without doing anything stupid. Allow yourself to cry, allow yourself to weep, allow your self to feel the pain of the hurt. This will help you accept yourself in your weakest moment. You see, accepting ourselves in our weakest moments especially when we fail helps us build the courage to prevent future occurrences. Please remember that you are seeking self reconciliation so you can fully enjoy the forgiveness from your wife. Next, you take responsibility for your action. Be accountable to how you failed and hurt the person you love the most and now there is a child involved. This would help you avoid transferring the anger from the 2nd stage to the unborn child who is innocent. Begin to love yourself again. Begin to rebuild with whatever ruins you have left. Don't allow this to define who you are today and that is by loving yourself again. Take pride in how far you have come. Finally, set boundaries. You can set boundaries about drinking away from home or when your wife is not present and if possible, you can stop drinking entirely as a token for the pain it caused.

Trippledots:
I linked her to the pack seller here. I think his monicker is eleojo or so.

eleojo23:
It seems Quanta batteries are the best on the market, right?

Biggieboy:
Who relating with people epp?

Na money everybody dey find abeg.

GeekfromLasgidi:
yes ..I'm interested in your svraps.

GeekfromLasgidi:
Please someone from there should help confirm this address.

hausadreturn:
Let me dm you. Check your mail.

hausadreturn:
How much is the Xtreme 105,000mah, and where did you buy it?

Trippledots:
I recommended one for someone who contacted me some weeks back. Its one of these lithium packs, and the person hasn't given me a complete feedback. But i think its working because if e no work e for don knick my door tey tey.

hausadreturn:
I need a good power bank for charging my laptop. Which one do you use, or can you recommend?

vibre:
Timi is busy posting pictures up and down when he should be more concerned about why his son resembles Fatoyinbo

Abo123:
I bet you that the same woman will complain if they have a single marathon of quarrel and beating. The next thing is to see her in the court again for divorce.
The real truth is that women now a days hate husband but love children

Abo123:
What do women want self?
If man is not nice there's issue
If man is too nice there's issue
What do you really want

blissgregory:
Very true

futurism:
I have always said yes u are smart woman...

ceaser:
Only a programmable SCC can give you the luxury to programme the output charge voltage and current to the battery pack. The 4s config gives (4.2v x 4 or 16.8v). Your regular 5000 naira 12v/24v PWM SCC can only do fixed 15.5 volt output at the battery terminals. That is suboptimal for your Li-on pack. 15.5v charge will bring each cell to 3.8v which although is not entirely bad for the cell as the low discharge cut off is 2.7v per cell, but you won't be able to use the full capacity range between 2.7v to 4.2v of your battery.

So effectively at the end of the day, you will be cheating yourself.

brijibs:

Instead if reloading, just leave it and try later naa

What I do, when my network is poor, I click BACK. This'll take me back to the queue, then I refresh the page and it displays this.
Then when network is back up, I simply click on the CID and continue with the call.

iClef:
You have a point too, Victor.

Her: Baby, if other guys...blah blah blah, should I accept?
You: Your instinct is your guide.
Her: How?
You: You're too smart for such a question.

Then change topic instantly to something naughty or funny.

Though, his direct answer is also great.

samsard:
Good graces, losing work to reloading audio after a bad connection,

samsard:
I know an exchanger that will offer more than 300 per USD for $100, definitely ridiculous selling PayPal funds at N250.

Penuelseun:
I think it is better you use the blue Lithium battery as it can accept charge voltage of up to 14.6v, then buy a charge controller that has adjustable voltage while the black Zinox battery is a 16.2v battery and it is hard to see a charge controller that has the capacity of that voltage level. Why don't you just go for lead acid as I won't advise you to go the Lithium way if you are not a technical person (Lithium is very dangerous if handled incorrectly)