₦airaland Forum

nairavsdollars:
Invasion by monkeys from natural habitat is forcing many residents of Soluyi/Sosanya Community in Gbagada, Lagos State, to flee. Some of the residents told the News men in Lagos on Monday that they could no longer withstand the situation.

They called on the state government to save the community from the trouble, saying that the animals forced their ways into their rooms, destroying window and door nets, food stuffs and other items.

The Chairman of the community’s Landlord Association, Mr Adigun Olaleye, said that it had become difficult for the community to curtail the monkeys and their destructive attitude.

He said that the invasion might have resulted from the nearness of the community to a swamp forest that separated the community from Ifako area.



According to him, the monkeys come into residences at any time including early morning and gain entrance into rooms even if the houses are locked.

Olalaye told the News men that the community had written a letter to the Lagos State Ministry of Agriculture as regards the situation but had yet to get a relief.

“They said we would have to pay for them to come and pack the monkeys,” he said. He said that the invasion had been on for years but recently became unbearable.

Olaleye appealed to the state government to urgently intervene.

Narrating her ordeal, a journalist who lives in the community, Mrs Funmilola Gboteku, told the News men that the monkeys had forced her family to flee.

“Many times, these monkeys come to the neighbourhood to destroy our property. Once they see food items inside a house, they direct all their energies at gaining entrance forcefully.



“The monkeys are in the habit of tearing the protective nets on windows to gain entrance and eat whatever they find in the house.“I have had to replace the protective nets several times; I am tired of doing it.

“I have been locking my windows but locking of windows has disadvantages; there is no cross ventilation in the house, and as a result, we suffer heat,’’ she told the News men.

Another landlord, Mr Oluwatosin Aregbesola, told the News men that his tenants were no longer feeling safe in the house because of the monkeys.

“The monkeys enter kitchens to eat our soups and any food stuff on the shelf.

“The day I tried to catch one of them, the monkey attacked me by using its long nails to punch a hole on my neck and scratch my face,” he said. Aregbesola appealed to the state government to save the community from the menace.

http://thenationonlineng.net/residents-invade-lagos-community/

Oh no, not again, now it's monkey dance! Buhari why?

Issakendrick:
A fulani herdsmen was seen having sex with one of his cows he was grazing Today, At Kubwa, Abuja.


Source:
http://www.nairaplus.com/2018/03/herdsman-seen-having-sex-with-one-of.html

Video Source: Ib9ja

This guy go tender 100k for one so called slay queen and she go open her legs only to come home to give her boyfriend the remaining, that's how strange STIs and STDs evolve herpes is one.

WotzupNG:
Senator Dino Melaye has shared pictures of his bullet proof G Wagon riddled with gun shots last year.

He wrote:

”After facing death in the face in kogi twice, will you want to be set up to die in kogi again? Watch this”.


https://www.wotzup.ng/dino-melaye-bullet-proof-g-wagon/

Bros alaye has to be careful, that g class is 2.23 armoured, he's lucky it wasn't a 7.62 bullet hitting the car it would have bulged, get a 7.62 armoured G Class from TAC systems, or at most an G guard armoured which can withstand an RPG attack, nice one dinno bambino! May God give u more speed

anibirelawal:
BRB

Comeback here! Where u de go, no be una put am, I thought he was ur godfather

stane007:
It seems the second runner-up of the 2017 edition of Big Brother Naija, TBoss is shading her father, Engr. Vincent Idowu, shortly after photos of his wedding ceremony went viral.


Recall that we reported yesterday that Engr. Vincent Idowu, a Civil Engineering lecturer at Ambrose Ali University, married a 400 level student of the school.

Speculation of a shade possibly for her father, came after we saw a photo TBoss shared on her Instagram page which reads 'some of the most poisonous people come disguised as friends and family'.

Recall that a post linked to TBoss' father, Engr Vincent Idowu earlier today, reads;

”When destiny smiles on someone, he forgets that there is life elsewhere. If I look like a roasted goat on my wedding day, that’s cool but that writer will soon become a resident of a subcity where people with severed limbs, broken bones, amputations, stinking blind and lame reside. THIS IS A PROMISE.

I live a humble, private life and did not intimate TBoss or any of her siblings of my plan to remarry in accordance with my tradition/custom. Furthermore, I did not make public or post anything about my marriage.

I am starting a new beginning and clearing the slate of all the wrong decisions I made in my life. I just want to forget Tokunbor (TBoss) and her siblings and start life afresh for all its worth. If and wherever Tboss and any of her siblings gets married, it shall be without my blessings and woe unto the man or the woman who marries any of them. So shall it be by the power vested on me by God Almighty”.

https://lailasnews.com/is-tboss-shading-her-father/

The ancestors are awaiting to execute the orders of her father, waitttttt........ , waitingggggg.......... steadyyyyyyyy........

Mztarstrechy:
As shared by Luke from Delta state......

'God's Miracles never end and they are marvellous in our eyes.

God saved me from a dangerous horrible looking  cobra yesterday night  in my toilet Seat(WC) here in Abraka delta state.

It was around 7.34pm when wanted to use the toilet (pee)  I decided to use my touch light to view the sink  before action,i saw a black stuff below the water in the toilet seat and I was trying to identify what it could be because I used the toilet some hours ago. Lo and behold it was a horrible looking cobra. I called the care taker of the hostel where I live, he came and confirmed it.The snake is so big that we couldn't devised another good means to kill it than the use of Gun .For more than 2hrs the snake was there until we called the attention of the vigilante group and finally it was killed with the aid of a gun.

Please always make sure you look very well before using your toilet. I couldn't believe how it entered but verifications say it came from the toilet suck away pit.

see photos below'.


https://m.facebook.com/luke.erukakpome/posts/pcb.2478942495664103/?photo_id=2478941992330820&mds=%2Fphotos%2Fviewer%2F%3Fphotoset_token%3Dpcb.2478942495664103%26photo%3D2478941992330820%26profileid%3D100006436197290%26source%3D48%26refid%3D28%26_ft_%3Dqid.6537293310959330330%253Amf_story_key.219884481108502389%253Atop_level_post_id.2074174419484600%253Asrc.22%26__tn__%3DEHH-R%26cached_data%3Dfalse%26ftid%3D&mdf=1

That was a king cobra, and a big one at that

Sweetcollins:
Take heart
Meanwhile, In other news...

Congratulations you have just been hit by a black spartan, prepare for glory!

Hoodites:
Source:

https://www.google.com.ng/amp/www.indiewire.com/2018/03/stormy-daniels-donald-trump-60-minutes-anderson-cooper-1201943506/amp/

.

As it said in the streets in nigeria, when market don end for olosho, e go de sell beer and cigar

naijjaman:
Sorry for his wife. Some men are really disgusting. A hooker, for crying out loud

Asking for a divorce plan? She will shoot you, the most powerful man in America?

Hold him steady, don't let him shift his head

SweetJoystick:
Buhari is cursed

Guy?
Why?
Do u know what ure saying?
U are upgrading him?
HE IS THE CURSE!
No make me vex here o, don't complicate my pains pls o

fk002:
I concur with Tonye


DOA



My vote goes to PMB come 2019

Your sapha nevba start, hungiri go kille you

If duke declares I'll run his personal security all trough his campaign for free, that's my guy, PDP BOT please shutdown the grid for Donald Duke no contest!

The poorest babes ma them de answer names like miz Porsche and Lucy berry, them get attachments for eyelash and eagle like claws, but their account no get money, the quiet and simple ones de spend their weekend for hawaii then return back here and look like mugu, na them be the hit women, in bed?
Take cover!

I knew she was cursed , pikin wen no get better orientation na em elders de use make bad parable or example

Ekekester:
A sad incident occurred yesterday at a Chinese restaurant in Adeniran Ogunsanya street, Surulere, Lagos, as it was gathered that a drunk man died after mistakenly drinking an insecticide at the restaurant.

The deceased who proceeded to hangout with friends at the restaurant after attending a wedding at Aguda, Surulere where he got drunk, drank the insecticide a staff of the restaurant had inadvertently left inside an empty bottle of water on his table.

The drunk man who ended up taking the insecticide instead of the bottle of water he ordered for, died while being rushed to hospital shortly after he opened up to his friends, that he took something thinking it was water.

The Manager of the Restaurant was arrested and detained at Bode Thomas Police Station, after the drunk man incident was reported.

http://www.asonaija.com.ng/2018/03/drunk-man-dies-after-mistakenly.html

a wise man once said "No native doctor can cure self poisoning"

12 stations of the cross nko, na there my protest go start, they should make sure he remains on ground

Let the dead bury the dead, that was actually a warning to leave the dead alone, Nigerians are so stupid p

HungerBAD:
God bless you Obidi.

Bold step I must say that you took, in looking for happiness for your mother. Hope she was not embarrassed by your antics?

Meanwhile.

Meet the eligible bachelor's of Nairaland, looking for love and a soul mate to spend their lives with.

Feel free to contact any.

A- Seun: 5ft 11, dark skin, shy, heavily loaded, knows a gold digger from afar and the password to his heart is PETS.

B- Lalasticlacla: 6ft 2, light skin, lives in Aba, has business interest in the Gas and oil sector, street smart, his heart has been broken 6 times before and has vowed to be careful this last time. Password to his heart SNAKE.

C- Mynd44 : 6Ft 1. Yoruba, but not a Yoruba demon. handsome, principled,loaded and ready to settle down if he sees the right woman. Password to his heart EFO RIRO.

D- Cutehector: Port-Harcourt girls will not let this one see road,and his family are having a meeting this evening for him to pick a wife in Abia. 5ft 10, light skin, gap toothed, has sweet mouth, banker and a Master's degree holder. Password to his heart FLEXING TINZ.

U no well, lol

Uncle TY pls press that 1985 flush button pls, we need it

BlowBack:
Buhari can't hear you or Danjuma as he is currently listening to glorious Jihadist inspired Islamic tunes downloaded straight from ISIS official website

https://www.nigerianmonitor.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/Buhari-swagg10.jpg

Instead of servicing the refineries he's paying Boko haram on the dapchi comedy

BlowBack:
Buhari can't hear you or Danjuma as he is currently listening to glorious Jihadist inspired Islamic tunes downloaded straight from ISIS official website

https://www.nigerianmonitor.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/Buhari-swagg10.jpg

Instead of servicing the refineries he's paying Boko haram

Igbo boyssss? No joy o, resource control no work reach them then na to check pipeline na? So they can see things and fix it themselves

F#ck girls , be warned!

Angelanest:
Officers of the Rumuolumeni police station in Rivers state have busted a baby factory in the area. Following credible information, police officers arrested one Kelechi Okamgba, a 37-year-old woman who is alleged to be operating the baby factory at Rumuolumeni. She was arrested on 19/3/2018 at 11am.

Upon her arrest, she led the Police to her Premises were four pregnant girls were found.

The pregnant girls are; Obianuju Nze 22 years, Chinemerum Orji 18 years, Josephine Chimena 33years, Chidinma Ndukwe 17years.

These pregnant girls are said to have gone there to mortgage their pregnancies and for possible sale to their identified customers.

Source; https://www.nationalhelm.co/2018/03/4-pregnant-girls-rescued-police-raid-baby-factory-rivers-state-photos.html

Igbos and baby factories, this shit is so dark and evil, imagine a man not knowing hid kids aren't his

Clerverly:
Francis Odinaka Uzoho (born 28 October 1998), Nigerian goalkeeper who plays for Spanish club Deportivo de La Coruña.. he's just 19, wow so young...

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Francis_Uzoho

This gorilla wen elders gorillas for jungle de stand up for when e sneeze? Damn!

imhotep:
By Nwafor Sunday

Nigerian military has on Sunday classified the statement credited to a former Chief of Army Staff, Lieutenant General Theophilus Yakubu Danjuma, as an unfortunate statement coming out from a highly distinguished statesman especially now the military has embarked on demilitarization of the North Central Region of the Country.

Danjuma The headquarter through its public relations director, Texas Chukwu, Brigadier General also warned Nigerians not to listen to the former chief of Army staff, noting that anyone caught in possession of arms would be dealt with. “The Nigerian Army is constitutionally charged with the responsibility of defending the territorial integrity of Nigeria and to aid the civil authority whenever called upon to do so”, part of its statement read. Recall that Danjuma had asked Nigerians especially Taraba indigenes to protect themselves or risk being killed by herdsmen. A statement he made at the convocation ceremony of the Taraba State University, yesterday that pinched the Nigerian Army. Danjuma said, “You must rise to protect yourselves from these people; if you depend on the armed forces to protect you, you will all die.

Chief of Army Staff Lieutenant General Tukur Buratai “I ask all of you to be on the alert and defend your country, defend your state. “This ethnic cleansing must stop in Taraba, and it must stop in Nigeria. These killers have been protected by the military; they cover them and you must be watchful to guide and protect yourselves because you have no other place to go”, he said.

In view of this therefore, the Nigerian headquarter on Sunday issued a statement warning Nigerians not to listen to the advice of the statesman for they are saddled with the responsibility of protecting the territory. Read its full statement below: “The attention of the Nigerian Army has been drawn to the unfortunate statement made by a former Chief of Army Staff, Lieutenant General Theophilus Yakubu Danjuma, during the convocation ceremony of the Taraba State University on Saturday 24 March 2018 in which he categorically asserted that the Armed Forces of Nigeria was colluding with militias and other criminal elements and was unable to provide security for the citizens of Taraba State.

He further called the people of Taraba State to take up arms and defend themselves. “The Nigerian Army views this statement made by the former Chief of Army Staff as most unfortunate at this critical time that the military has embarked upon demilitarisation of the North Central Region of the Country. “While Nigerian Army would not want to join issues with the Elder Statesman, however, certain facts need to be clearly stated in the interest of the Taraba People and the Nigerian public: “The Nigerian Army is constitutionally charged with the responsibility of defending the territorial integrity of Nigeria and to aid the civil authority whenever called upon to do so. In this light, the authorisation for the conduct of Ex AYEM AKPATUMA was authorised and troops deployed to curb menace of the herdsmen-farmers conflict and other criminal activities in the North Central Region amongst others. “

It is on record that the successes so far achieved in Ex AYEM AKPATUMA have been recognised and accepted by Nigerians. “The public is notified that Nigerian Army personnel have had to pay the supreme price for ensuring the sustenance of security in Taraba State. For instance, a gallant non-commission officer of the Nigerian Army was beheaded on 16 March 2018 in Takum Taraba State by criminal elements. “It is noteworthy to state that at the inception of Ex AYEM AKPATUMA, the Taraba State Government, did not cooperate with the Nigerian Army due to the Army’s stance to remain absolutely neutral in the herdsmen-farmers crisis. The Nigerian Army will continue to remain as such. “For avoidance of doubt, the Nigerian Army advises the people of Taraba State and indeed all other Nigerians to continue in their day-to-day activities and be law abiding as anyone caught with arms and ammunition will be dealt with accordance with the laws of the land. Every law-abiding citizen is assured of equal protection and security of their lives and property irrespective of his/her person.”

Read more at: https://www.vanguardngr.com/2018/03/breaking-nigerian-army-tackles-ty-danjuma-warns-nigerians-law-abiding/

Uncle T.Y is on point, that's ma nigga, if he could get any better, that's my hitman

Somebody hold this guys face for me. Don't let him move

Funny enough, it a trojan horse, she either can't cook or she's a flat tyre, and trust me there's no spare in her trunk

It happens

When a woman want you a for love or sex, it's one way she takes you or she breaks you, either way u will loose nobody beats a woman in a battle of the sexes

When a woman want you a for love or sex, it's one way she takes you or she breaks you, either way u will loose.