₦airaland Forum

@GHoJes, you're so on point about the thick skin part and the western laws that favour women over there as it relates to my sis. He won't be able to try nonsense with the new wife and get away with it.It is well....

blessedtwins:
goldmine:thank you.though mum too is late but her sisters are aware.I want help.My elder sister who was a close friend of his doesn't talk with me anymore because I stayed in the marriage after things broke down in January.Its not that I want to stay but my dad doesn't approve leaving is the only thing bothering me now.I am not working yet but I am still searching for a teaching job prefarably on the mainland.The one I got on the Island is on hold till April due to pregnancy.
ahnie:pm sent
Kimoni and nkkystel thank you for being there.I feel so lonely.

My dear sister, it's disheartening to know that you are not working yet. It's imperative as Kimoni advised for you to be financially independent so that when the time comes that you can summon the courage to leave, you can survive on your own. Cos truth is some family members,friends and in-laws who feel your pain cannot add your financial burden to theirs no matter how much they wish to help and they can't tell you to your face. They also wish for your marriage to work.

Now i'm not advocating for you, ahnie and any other person out there to break your homes, I just wish for you all to be safe. You can try to work things out with your hubby from a safe distance if you're still interested in being with him.

You mentioned you remained with your hubby because your dad disapproved. You're an adult and no one can force you against your wish to remain in a situation that makes you fear for your safety. You're the one feeling the pain,not them. Would you forgive yourself if you lose your pregnancy or baby as a result of the battering? If you have an option of where to go, grab it and sort things out from there. Otherwise, you'll wait till you start working and strategically save towards your exit. In the meantime,contact that foundation. At least for counselling. You have already made a mistake with your choice of a life partner. Make up your mind to find a solution to the problem and act fast rather than put yourself at risk.

The last thing you both need now is this depression and feeling of loneliness. And when it gets to the point where your family members can't come around because of him or stop communicating with you, it is dangerous. Better safe than sorry.

Some cases of domestic violence don't even cost the victims their lives. It is the aggressor that could lose his life. Some women who have endured for so long could lose it one day and kill their husbands or even themselves just to end the misery. It is real. Don't endure what might turn you into something else.

You need counselling. In the meantime while you're trying to figure out how to sort things out, continue being a good wife. He's your husband and by now you should know most of the things that could trigger violence. Please avoid them. Stay safe dears and try to make yourselves happy no matter what.

@ahnie and @blessedtwins, I can imagine and relate with what you both are going through cos my elder sister was a victim of domestic violence.Pls never try to embellish it or give it a nice name. You are both being abused.
Sorry 4 the long story. But to both of you and any other person going through domestic violence in silence, you need help. It's a good thing you both have opened up. But is the solution really 'renting' your husband out? Then after d rent,he returns to continue on u from where he has stopped? Wise up,my sisters. Have you discussed this problem with family? What did they think/do about it?

I'm a very strong advocate of being submissive to your husband as a woman but it shouldn't be done to the point of being foolish. The man in question has to be deserving of it. And in as much as I don't like the idea of separation or divorce, I would NEVER put up with domestic violence. I believe in God and the efficacy of prayers. But for how long do you intend to pray? I believe it has gotten to the point where you should run for your dear lives and be praying for your marriage from there. It is not impossible for things to improve later.

Most men who have ended up killing or maiming their wives through domestic violence didn't do so because they planned to do it or because they completely stopped loving their wives. The problem was,one day, they allowed their rage control them to the point where they didn't know when to stop.

Pls seek for help.

Project Alert on Violence Against Women (PROJECT ALERT)

Address:21, Akinsanya Street Off Isheri Road, Taiwo Bus stop (Behind FRSC) Ojodu - Berger Lagos, Nigeria
Telephone/E-mail:      234-1-8209387; 08052004698; 08180091072
projectalert@projectalertnig.org
info@projectalertnig.org

Put a call through to them. They help with counselling. And legal assistance where necessary. If you are not based in Lagos,still call and find out if they can help out with contact of a similar foundation around where you live. It is well with you both. You'll be in my prayers. What you're going through is what I would never wish for my enemies.

Do let us know how it goes. Also be sincere with yourselves and ensure you aren't the ones provoking such acts of violence from your husbands. But then, if it's your hubbys that have a problem, then you shouldn't be at d receiving end or be their punching bags. Do take care. E hugs to you both.

Anak123:
Thank u so much. Everyone thinks m overreacting. No hospital or scan yet. My last period was on the 4/7. Normal flow. Don't know which hospital to use sef. I stay at ikeja. Or should I just get the scan done first? First time ooo. Btw v only felt nauseous once so far

Hello dear,did you eventually have your tummy checked out based on the hardness you complained of? Do let us know how it went. Hope you're okay.
#proudlyteamdecember#

missmalachi:
My wonderful E family, my princess that decided to join me in ember month arrived @ 4:15 pm weighing 3.4.

Bs later.
I still remain proudly team august.

Congrats Mama. May her presence usher in loads of blessings to your home.

Wish me well by Timi Dakolo. Produced by Cobhams.

helovesme:
Team September, I have been elevated an pomoted.

I gave birth to my prince this morning.

Birth story coming soon

Congrats dear.

@Chinwedym and @Anak123, methinks with a Last menstrual period of 4th of July,it's exactly 8weeks now. I was able to see my foetuses at 8weeks. Luth is at Idi Araba, not Ikeja. It's Lagos state University teaching hospital(popularly called Ikeja general hospital in the past) that is at Ikeja in Ayinke house. It's opposite conoil filling station that is close to that bridge at Ikeja that leads straight to the airport. That is if you want to use a govt hospital.

I'm not so sure about private hospitals around there. Really depends on if u want govt/private and your budget. I've heard a lot about Mother and Child(private) at Adeniyi Jones though.

The hardness really needs to be checked out @Anak123.

#proudlyteamdecember#

Anak123:
Tnk u so much....I'm kinda worried as the hardness seems to have gotten close to my belly bottom. Infact anytime I bend from the waist or turn while sleeping anyhow the 'bump' becomes really hard and a little more raised. Me I don't understand .I am really really looking like pregnant with a round tummy. Everyone is saying it's too early too see anything in an ultrasound. Ha! 8 weeks now. Or am I farther along than I think?

I don't know about this hardness o my sister. If it's truly 8 weeks something should show in an ultrasound. When I had bleeding at 6 wks and went to the hospital,the ultrasound didn't reveal much. Was asked to return2wks later,by which time they were able to confirm that everything was okay after another ultrasound. I think you should see your doctor. Do keep us updated on the results.
Try as much as possible to avoid bending at the waist in this condition. Wish u happy bumping.

Pls Nurse Kaffy and other experienced Mama's what do you think? I doubt if the hardness is normal.
#proudlyteamdecember#

everfaithfulGod:
everybody i hail o.
i was at d antenatal today and during health talk they introduce frisomum to us bt want to make some findings bfor i buy.
is anyone taking it here?
if i buy,can i use with my pregnacare?
does it taste nice?
pls i need answers to my questions abeg o.
to go. lolz
#proudlyteamoctober#

I'm taking frisomum and yes it can be used with pregnacare. It tastes really nice,infact the taste reminds me of warm ice cream. Some expectant mums I know use it in about anything they consume that requires milk. Personally I prefer to take it as directed on the tin, i.e. diluting a specified quantity in warm water and drinking directly. That way the effectiveness is optimized. Sometimes I do feel nauseous while drinking it. But that's a personal problem cos i've never had a sweet tooth or fancied sweet things even when i'm not pregnant. Always preferred sour taste. Taking the frisomum for the health benefit mainly. I can assure u that u'll like the taste.

Take note that it doesn't dissolve well in cold or ordinary water just in case u decide to take it in other forms besides the directions indicated on the tin. Hope the info helps.
#proudlyteamdecember#

lizdammy:
"I wish you could help me know how to prevent a miscarriage from happening. Im almost two months pregnant and bleeding."

It won't be a miscarriage by the grace of God. Had both bleeding and spotting several times between my 6th and 12th week. Was so scared I would lose my babies. They're doing very well now. Was given klovinal vaginal pessaries and bed rest was recommended. I was also 'banned' from kpekusing. Go see your doctor. I hope that at the very worst,all you'll need is bed rest. Do take care.
#proudlyteamdecember#

nefertitiram:
Mini me was born at 1pm US time yesterday, weighing 4.3kg . Birth story when I settle down

Finally we get to hear the news. Congrats Mama. May your joy know no bounds.

gocare:
My sweet princess has arrived. It wasn't easy but at last my God took charge. It was CS. Please help me thank God. BS latter.

Congrats dear. Wish u quick recovery.

Oya other August mamas keep it rolling!
#proudlyteamdecember#

JOYSOLO:
Glory be to God, join me to celebrate, i just tested, and it was positive, when i least expected it. my good Lord has done it for me, join me to celebrate, i will be due by April 2016, wao is a long journey but God will see us all through in Jesus name.

Congrats. God will surely see u through.

Hafsat24:
@xeexee1..my dear I'm in your shoes o..going through the same right now..tummy is soo hard,stretched and shiny ..to pray self is a big case..I eat lil but for where..d tummy expands sharply
Leading to gas bad constipation..its beginning to itch me self..had to get shea butter cos im scared of stretch marks .I've resolved into eating and not taking water till like in 2hrs..hmm..e no easy rara..

Teammates how are we..how's the pushing going.. May
God make it easy on us all Ameen

#proudlyteamDecember#

Pele dear team mate. Same here o despite d fact that meal quantity has reduced seriously as a result of low appetite. Wondering how I would cope with the rest of the journey with these 2 wonderful gifts i'm so excited to meet and the tummy tightness. It is well.
#proudlyteamdecember#

Anak123:
Hello
It's bin gr8 reading through comments on here. M a newbie so..... Ok....just found out m pregnant about 3 weeks ago(wen I missed my p), so I should be like 7 weeks gone right? Well the thing is I'm feeling a kind of hardness just above my pubic bone (for about 2 weeks now).... Got no symptoms at all( no nausea, no sore or nipples) except tiredness n cramps. So my question is, isn't it too early to feel/grow a bump Thank you

Welcome on board dear. Still early to grow a bump o. The tiredness and the cramps are part of the package. Had similar experience with my first pregnancy. Hope u've started taking your prenatal drugs. If not pls start ASAP. Wish you happy bumping.
#proudlyteamdecember#

nefertitiram:
Original human hair not the one made and assembled in that place... whats the name again?

*runs away from thread before they beam their light on me*

Abeg run fast dear.

soonest:
And many igbos find it offensive and are free to air their annoyance. Let's be mindful of what we say.
Good morning everyone

It's not an excuse for them to be rude my sister. Whoever finds it offensive can simply express their displeasure without using such harsh words. After all, the person who used the 'offensive' word was speaking generally and didn't attack anyone directly. She only expressed what she thought without anger or malice.

Let's take things easy please. We're truly one big family regardless of tribe or denomination. #peace. #proudlyteamdecember#

Deezou:
Pls modath and other sabi mamas help me with d brand of baby set(oil,powder,soap etc) dats d best for baby's tender skin.plus d best brand of diaper.TIA

For skin care range, i'll recommend ASDA little angels. It's very good.

mumsgirl27:
Praise the Lord, the Lord blessed us with d most beautiful princess this morning...,BS later

Congrats dear. May her birth usher into ur home everlasting joy and peace.

@Faithfulwife... ok. quite informative. Thanks a lot.

faithfulwife:
@goldmine, I know the feeling, hmmm, it will end in praise. I also didn't experience MS and always wondered if I was really pregnant until I started growing a bump. Sorry to ask, did you have a cerclage done since you are carrying twins? I did , though mine was more of preventive since it took us a while before we got pregnant .

No I didn't have a cerclage done. Pleas what is it about? Is it a standard procedure for a case like mine?

#proudlyteamdecember#

faithfulwife:
Hello fellow teammates, is anyone experiencing loss of appetite? I don't really feel hungry or crave anything and when I eventually force myself to eat, the food just sits in my tummy making me uncomfortable. In my first trimester, I ate like a horse but now, nothing interests me.

I am experiencing loss of appetite. Infact mine started from the onset of the pregnancy. Didn't experience ms though I had expected I would eat like a horse considering it's multiple. That I manage to east these days is because I just psyche myself up that i'll be punishing my babies if I don't eat. Also DH won't let me whenever he's around and observes my eating habit.

But honestly eating even a small portion feels like my system is full up to my throat and the food is about come right out. It's gotten worse since I was down with malaria and have received treatment and recovered from it.

#proudlyteamdecember#

xeexee1:
Hello mamas! Ve been a silent reader God bless u all am a FTM please whose #Team December# here ooo mak I see ma partners so we could rub mind tnk you..

Alright, here's the list(so far) for team December.
1. Goldmine
2. Besocial
3. Hafsat24
4. Faithfulwife
5. Lizzy22
6. Nnetriplet
7. Xeexee1
8. Livelystone
9. Soonest
10.Culturegown
11.Dv4real
12.MiddyO
13.Aim07

If i've omitted your name, kindly indicate so that your name can be included. Wishing everyone happy bumping.#proudlyteamdecember#

@IyaderaChuks God is indeed faithful. So happy for you. May God use you as a point of contact to all ttc mama's out there. May your joy be endless and know no bounds.

Rute:
@iphudim send your email via pm so I can send you the books

Congrants to new mummies

Please I would also like to have the books sent to me. Thanks.

Nnetriplet:
Una good morning super mommas, please where are the team December.....and I wanna ask again is it normal not to feel pregnant for a FTM.

Team december here! About the not feeling pregnant part, from my personal experience, I think you feel pregnant much earlier with subsequent pregnancies. That is if you're referring to baby's kicks and movements o. With my 1st, I began to feel it at 5 months. 2nd and 3rd at 4mths. This current one that's multiple I started feeling about 2 or 3weeks ago.

Don't worry. Probably anytime from now you would begin to feel it.

Beryl15:
Come and join me sing hallelujah o!
My princess is here. she arrived at 3:07pm and weighed 6lbs 14oz.
BS later, lemme rest.

Congrats dear. #team August not disappointing at all!

tyconcepts:
Secondly I did a scan at 32wks and it showed baby in breech, my Doc told me to chill that baby still have time to turn. I visited my local midwife who checked and said baby is in normal position that I should ignore my scan result...Who do I believe??

The doctor could be right. Don't panic just yet. U do still have time for the baby to turn. baby I had in my previous delivery was in breach position at 36 weeks. Was told by the doctor that there was possibility of the baby turning b4 EDD. By my next appointment the following week, he confirmed that the baby had actually turned.

So the midwife may also be right. Baby might actually have turned between the time you saw the doctor and the time you saw her. The doctor should be able to re-confirm her stand by your next appointment.

Pele about the weakness. You'll tire easily around this period. Try not to over exert urself. Get plenty rest. The anxiety you'll be feeling now no be here. Just relax. Wish you and all of us still pushing a safe and hitch-free delivery in advance.

Proudly #team december.

Kimoni:
I always start mine after 2 months, Biko can we exchange bodies?

For each of my 3 previous deliveries, I started exactly after 4 weeks. Really heavy for that matter matter. My only joy was that the excruciating menstrual pain i always experienced before my 1st pregnancy never returned. I so envy those who don't get to start for months after delivery. My mother-in-law said with all 6 deliveries her period didn't return until after she weaned the babies. And she nursed for as long as 18 months o. Lucky her.

maebem:
Praise praise ye the lord, my prince and princess arrived yersterday 8.42 pm via cs. Mum and twins r doing fine. Thank u lord for ur faithfulness.

Congrats dear. Wish you speedy recovery.