₦airaland Forum

okotv:
I have great respect for your comments in the family section and I respect you as a mother...a faceless forum breeds disrespect but my person I cannot lose....

thanks!
I'm humbled.

okotv:
:Dmy sister, since when did I become some people now ?

lol

money121:
@op please ca i post this on my blog??

Www.gistmelove . Com

feel free!
Life is too short!

pickabeau1:
All sin is sin

According to Christian theology there should be no difference between adultery and fornication

Moreover the bible allows for divorce in the event of infidelity or adultery

More naija people should exercise that option like our counterparts in the West.

Too many cheating threads everywhere

thank you!
Divorce is another good option in case of infidelity and abuse.
Believe me, i will gladly go for divorce(God forbid) if my spouse turns a cheat than suffering from several heartaches and fear from STDs, which means the person involved or affected has chosen to reverse to singlehood.

bukatyne:
You know that is not what we are saying

Everybody has the freewill to sleep around or not and nobody including God can take it away

However, you take a vow to be faithful to spouse and you are expected to keep it. If you can't, please don't bother and keep playing the field

P.S.: The rightness or not of sleeping around is outside the scope of this thread

thank you o.
I honestly don't know why some people intentionally twist obvious facts.

pickabeau1:


As you can see only sin in marriage is sin where women r concerned

is that how you also see it?

See, i'm not talking about sins generally here, i'm taking about keeping to your marital vow if you're married or intend to marry.
We all know that sins is against anything good or of good report, and we also are aware of its consequences, its effect, but that's not the subject matter in this thread, infidelity in marriage is what this thread is about, not whether some sins are good while some are bad.
Thanks.

okotv:
in other words, cheating a married partner is wrong but sleeping around can be tolerated as long as you are not married

No offence my brother, did you read the body of the thread at all
And if you did and that is your own interpretation to it, then, goodluck.

money121:
Kudos to the op

Am comin back to comment weller


if this Topic no hit front page...








Make i turn W

lol....

bukatyne:
And has done it again! very nice thread

I also wonder

Children out of wedlock are not as stigmatized as before so I don't know why he/she cannot have one or two kids and keep sleeping around

thank you my sister.
Anyone who can't keep to his/her marital vow but desire to have kids can achieve it without necessarily committing him/herself to any vow.
For men, they can achieve their desire through surrogacy and for women, they can achieve it through anonimous sper*m donation........and every one is happy without causing anybody the heartache of infidelity.

It is very disheartening and amazing, yet trending on how many couples are cheating on each other after they have made a public vow to stick and be faithful to their partner in the presence of God and everyone present at the solemnization of marriage/wedding ceremony.
Many people are no longer ashamed to cheat on their spouses, infact, to some it's like a thing to be proud of when breaking the marital vow.
In the holy book i believe in, it is written therein that, it is better not to make a vow than to make it and not fulfilling it.
While discussing about it with someone, he said maybe those involved in cheating on their partners aint aware that they're breaking any vow, which makes them not better than a betrayer. I think at this junction, we need to examine the vow made by the couple to each other on their wedding day and see if it's different from making a vow..........



To the groom........the officiating minister(either in church or court) asks.....do you (groom's names) promise to take this woman(bride's names) as your legally and only wife, to love and care for in health and sickness, in wealth and poverty, for better and for worse, and also to forsake other women, till death do you part? And the man answers...........Yes, i do!

To the bride.......the officiating minister (either in church or court) asks...........do you(bride's names) take this man(groom's names) as your legal and only husband to love and care, in health and sickness, wealth and poverty, for better and for worse, and also forsaking other men, till death do you part? And the woman answers..........Yes, i do.

If this is not a vow, i wonder what it is.
It is high time people start taking their marriages serious, everybody knows him/herself very well, if you know that you have problem keeping to your marriage vow, then, please remain single, it's better than making a vow and not keeping it.
I don't know the party that is more involved, be it husbands or wives, but please, if you're into extra-marital affairs, please, stop and retrace your steps. Also, if you're planning to get married, ensure and decide to keep to your marital vow, and as you're doing so, you're doing yourself a lot of good as well as putting a stop to all ridiculous stories we hear and read about couples cheating on each other.

Apart from the fact that cheating on one's spouse is unhealthy in every aspect one may look at it, it is also full of regrets at the end of it all.

Before i stop..........a food for thought for us all, treat your spouse the way you want him/her to treat you.


If you're a man, and you're cheating on your wife, how will you feel if it's your wife that is cheating on you?


If you're a woman, and you're cheating on your husband, how will you feel if it's your husband that is cheating on you?

May God help us all.

But GEJ once said he doesn't give a damn, why now reacting to what he doesn't give a damn to? Abi he has started giving "damns"?

owunnegodswill:
Any man that doesn't take the advantage of his wife absence is not a real man.me even if I marry I must chase other women-younger or older.But I will not let my self to be caught by my wife.

marriage is not meant for you, you made a vow to be faithful to your wife, it's better not to make a vow than to make it and not abide with it.

@op, what is her name, i'm not texting her, i'm calling hee, after which i will call you yourself to ask some questions from you.
You can pm me if you dont want to make her name public.
It is wel.

bukatyne:
greatgod2012,

This is a very beautiful and practical thread as always

I liken ungratefulness to lack of home training really. Some people find it so difficult saying 'please', 'thank you', 'sorry' and other normal greeting.

Thank you once again for opening that birthday thread for nashville and myself last year

Hope you are gearing to open another one this year (LOL!)

The talk 'children of nowadays' when made by parents disgust me. Same with telling him/her 'you lack home training' seriously? they failed in bringing up their kids and they can still say it

May God continue to crown our efforts on our kids

Lol...
Happy birthday in advance.

To be honest with you, your parents means well for you, they really love you only that they don't really know how to express the love in a cool and calm way.

What can you do? Tell them there's something you want to discuss with them, when they give you the attention, first thank them for their love and care, let them know you also love and care for them, and that for now, the only way you can show the love is to be well-behaved as you have always being doing, but it pains you when you're not believed in which makes them to continually shout on you and the effect of the screaming is that it might push you away, which you wouldn't want happen. Another effect is that it may kill your morale and be left wilh low self esteem.
After your discussion with them, thank them for their love and understanding. And you too, always behave well o.
It is well.

It's obvious and unfortunate that many don't really understand what marriage is all about.
Marriage is all about partnership, teamwork, in everything, every aspect and every area in love, understanding and empathy.
Marriage is not about one-man battalion, it's about two people working as one in every area that involves their marriage and lives.
If, as wife, you really love your husband, with understanding and empathy, you will realise that it's "unmarriage"(formed by me) to saddle your husband with all the financial responsibilities, apart from the fact that it isn't good for his health, it shows that you yourself aint committed to being teamed up with your husband, (selfishness)which sooner than later, may brings up unhealthy marital relationship to spring up.

Similarly, if, as a husband, if you really love your wife and see her as part of you, you will involve her in every decision to be taken at home, and in your life, when it comes to household matters, you will know that you're both one and act accordingly. You will see her as part of you that mustn't be neglected or abandoned.
At the end of the day, both parties enjoy their commitment towards each other and peace reigns absolutely.

@natasha, this is good and nice of you, may God bless you greatly.
For this you have done, may you never run out of God's favour.
Infact, you're giver, and your hands shall continually be on top.

booqee:
lalasticlala u failed to mention the tribalist... these pple can turn a beautiful thread to $hhiit! the nature of d thread is not an obstacle for them, let the thread be about chocolates and candies, they will still find a way to tribalise the thread!! I won't mention which but a particular tribe is most guilty.

the motivators: greatgod2012, chaircover, jarus.

thread creators: onila, Mrcork, lalasticlala.

jocose: yuzedo, madcow, okijajuju, mrcork.

the mouthed: khalessi (well I won't particularly call her mouthed, cos she doesn't just go about abusing pple for no just cause. But if you're unfortunate to be in an e-fight with her, she can make u commit suicide)

attention seekers: kanwulia, tpia (although pple av started giving tpia less attention these days). .

thanks ma!
I'm humbled!

prettythicksme:
I am really going crazy right now because my husband don't like me going out especially to my parent house.what does that mean nairalanders??

what really happened?
No smoke without fire.

@chiefinalowo,
you even attested to the fact that you have money, juju, jazz, amunimuye, that tells a lot about your person and your marriage, if your story here is anything close to truth.

beeevan:
And you believed that wives in polygamous setting are damn so faithful?

True. Many of the wives actually pay them back in their own coin.

Sophyrocks:
Thank you. And he is asking which one is better when they are both the same.

don't mind those unfaithful men, that is part of the thing they say to rope the innocent and faithful women, whereas, they knows within them that their wandering about is what led them choiceless of becoming polygamous. Well, personally, sha, any polygamous man was never faithful, it's cheating gone from bad to worse to worst to agidi.

chiefinalowo:
@carefreewannabe and others

Please be sincere, answer the below question

Which is better?
To be polygamous or to be engaged in extra-marital affairs with several women?

95% polygamy is as a result of cheating. Almost, if not all 2nd, 3rd,etc wives were formerly mistresses, so, it's still the same IMHO.

Chai!.......lobatan!
I give up! Completely!


But then, it's your own opinion.

In your counter thread here,
https://www.nairaland.com/1927330/woman-cant-cook-highly-irresponsible, my stand is that, there is nothing wrong if men too know how to cook and carry out some housechores in order to give a helping hand to their wives when and where necessary, afterall, marriage is all about two people agreeing to become one and loving each other.

In this also, there is nothing wrong for the woman to give a helping hand financially, since the two of them are in the best interest of each other.

In conclusion, in marriage, both the husband and wife have to be responsible to each other in every area that would make them to be happy with each other, not only in food preparation by the woman and money provision by the man.
It is well.

This is the summary of your thread, @op
1Timothy5:8.......
But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and he is worse than an infidel(unbeliever).

Give her a warm beverage to drink and back her, after she sleeps off, gently lay her on the bed, meanwhile, ensure disturbances like wet diaper, heat and so on have already been dealt with.
It is well, e no easy, but God is always our strenght.

alutacontinua: Some comments on this thread make me wanna weep for the ladies of this generation

obviously, the thread was transfered from romance section to this section.

nefertitiram: I don't know how to cope with the death of my newborn babies.
They were born premature at 6 months 3 weeks and gave up a hour later.
It has been two weeks and the depression is overwhelming.
There are days I try to be strong, everyone expects you to be strong but the truth is, I can't be strong.
I endured 6 painful months of the pregnancy, the morning sickness that never stopped, endless hunger but couldn't eat, heartburn, joint pains, at a point difficult breathing.
Everyday I blame myself for their death, I pushed myself even when didn't have the strength anymore.
I struggled to go to work, so as not to offend my overbearing boss. I had no one to confide in, I was all alone and bore the pains alone.
I was almost at the end, almost there, then a strange bleeding started, no! haemorrhage, I almost lost my life, another day, I may write on how God delivered me to fulfill his purpose on earth.
It was either me, or me and the babies, with all the blood lost, the only option was too operate.
Bottomline, the babies died, I lived.
There is no day I don't blame myself for it all. I should have stopped working, I should have opened up more to people around me, I should have listened to my body, listened to my doctors. I should have eaten more, I should have...
Should have, would have, could have...
I am full of regrets.
I am still in pains recovering from the surgery, but the pain in my heart for my babies, is nothing compared!
How do I overcome this grief?
There are periods of awareness, where I smile and show the whole world I am fine.
There are periods like right now, when it dawns on me I can no longer feel them kick, that I will never hold them in my arms, I will never watch them grow.
This pain is greater than me, I don't know how much more of it I can take.
Please tell me, show me, help me...
How can I cope with this grief?
I should be grateful I am alive, all doctors I have discussed with say only a few people survive it, but I feel so sad for my babies.
You may ask about my husband, he was there, but never there.
I guess I was carried away by my pregnancy, and maybe he felt not carried along, I don't know...

sorry my dear sister.
It's obviously a very difficult thing, but time heals!
Stop blaming yourself, it has happened, it has happened.
There's nothing wrong in griefing your lost loved ones but also try to consider your health too.
May God restore your joy. Amen.
May God give you reason to rejoice again.

Does that mean pastor Christ and pastor Anita were not really into each other as we were made to believe?
Does that means Pastor Chris had already given up on his marriage, even when the divorce saga is yet to be finalised?
Does that mean he has already finalised on reconciliation process between him and his wife?
Does that mean the two pastors are already malicious against each other?
What exactly have they both been preaching then, if they can be this embittered towards each other?
Are they even conscious enough of the effect of all these on their teenage daughters?

So many questions, but i pray to God to see them through, even though it seems they were never really into each other

The only reason for anyone(not only girls, including guys, though it's more common with girls)to bleach is INFERIORITY COMPLEX. It means they're not proud of their skin colour and that fair-complexion ladies have upperhand when it comes to being in relationship.