₦airaland Forum

cindybaby22:
you are right
that guy got serious issues with women
i doubt if he was raised by a woman at all
his bitterness is something else, all his comments are geared at making women feel less human.
smh for him.

EgunMogaji:
Your userid seems familiar, have we had an encounter in the past?

EgunMogaji:
Exactly, right?

kandiikane:
In many cultures, women can retain their names if they want to, the decision is totally up them, changing name in Africa was brought to you by the white man.

EgunMogaji:
It is what it is, these things happen.
I don't chase women around, especially exes, that's what Lawyer's are for
Islam, Hindu, Ifa, it doesn't matter to me. My rule, non negotiable

EgunMogaji:
1) Every single entity that has a hyphenated last name is a royal beyotch. FACT.

2) Every single one is married to a sissified man. FACT

EgunMogaji doesn't tolerate BS, marry me or stay married to your fathers name. Choice is clear.

I also hate those that keep it after divorce. I had to force the Ex in court to drop my last name because she wanted to keep it so people can know she's the mother of her black kids (she's white).

johnson232:
@bold that's your own definition of a good husband.... because u haven't feel the presence of a real man.. to some an imbe.ccile makes a good husband... glad u know only weak men condone such...

Acidosis:
It is not your business, but it is the responsibility of the family to receive the price. You have no say on that subject actually.



I'm just concerned about all your cries.



Again, names are very significant in this part of the world. It is one of those things feminism may not be able to erase anytime soon. Although I see them agitating for equality in names soon A time would come when women would be called Buhari, and Jonathan. We might soon begin to call our boys Aisha, Haneefah





Sorry, you didn't make sense. Or was that meant as a very dry joke?

dahaz:
small girl ke with all does big big english wey you de write, all does arguments and e-fights wey you de ALWAYS get involve. you don overripe self

so what will i do with the application?

joseph1832:
Exactly. Its the very thing that is wrong with this country.

Acidosis:
Do you have a younger sister? Can I boycott the price and still marry her?


Meanwhile, changing to the husband's name is not for mere identification. In fact, that is the only thing that shows a woman is married aside the material ring which can be worn and purchased by anyone. Every other frivolous activities including the millions spent on a Saturday, jollof rice, aso ebi and wedding gown, are the actual mere.

Trina0936:
She was actually pitying the fact that she wasn't even thinking about him at all!

Jamieblack:
I told her how I missed her and couldn't concentrate on a task I was doing and she replied with ehya..ladies pls what does that mean..

joseph1832:
The problem with today's men and woman have always been their failure and inability to ask pertinent questions.

For instance, how will my wife keeping her maiden name, or using my surname make us happy? Or live happily ever after?

crackhaus:
That is not what you should read up on.

You said that even taking one's husband name could be a borrowed culture, because we can't know what was happening in the very old days.

And I said you can know what happened in the very distant history of Nigeria by reading to know what was and was not, generally speaking.

joseph1832:
The questions the OP raised have a lot to do with personal choice, nothing more, nothing less.

Any woman who wants to shed her maiden name can do so, if she likes. Its entirely up to her husband and her.

crackhaus:
I do, and you would too if only you read up on it.

Knowledge and learning is for everyone.

Acidosis:
Yes, it is compulsory to pay bride price to a Nigerian family. It is our Culture.

crackhaus:
I only sought to enlighten you on the relationship between name change and feminism - indeed, the former is a direct consequence of the latter in most countries with the exception of Spanish-speaking territories, Korea and Malaysia like I already noted.

An average Nigerian woman with no strong family name has no business thinking of retaining her maiden name legally after marriage, it has never been our culture no matter how any of you try to look at it or paint it - it is a borrowed construct which is being perpetuated by women who want to seem posh, contemporary, cool, and well-exposed.

bukatyne:
Everyone does as they deem fit.
Some women have started adding their husband's first name to the surname sef.
Whatever rocks each person'e boat o jare.

Acidosis:
The italicized means: once you eat your cake, it is gone. Once you accept to get and stay married into another family, your family's name becomes history. You can ask Aisha Buhari, Patience Jonathan and Turai Yar'adua why they failed to stick with their father's name.

This is Nigeria (Africa) where a bride's family still accept dowry and other associated perquisites.

You can continue to pretend and act like you have no understanding of my explanations. What I'm sure is that this singular thread will go a long way in depopulating the covens of misguided African feminists who want to collect dowry, yet attach the western ideology of name retention.

dahaz:
so you are now ready for marriage? make I send my application wey I write tey tey?

crackhaus:
Is it Haram or not?

crackhaus:
The fact you're asking that question gives credence to your ignorance about the history of 'name change' as regards marriage...apologies for the choice of words, but I'm sure you already know that I don't sugarcoat on here.

Retaining one's maiden name after marriage became more of a thing after the advent of gender equality cum feminism - examples of places where feminism and gender equality birthed it include USA, France, Greece, Belgium, Québec, Italy, etc. and oh, Nigeria of course.

With the exception of USA, it is now against the law for a woman to change her name legally after marriage in Greece, Belgium, Québec, and Italy...thanks to feminism.


** It should be clear however that there are actually cultures and countries where it has always been a tradition for women to attach their maiden names names to their surnames (not still compulsory though) - and off the top of my head, Spain and most spanish-speaking territories fall under this category.

It was actually the Spanish that started and made popular this new fad of hyphenated names for married women - it has always been a tradition for them but for every other person who does it, it is simply follow-follow or some supposed gender equality.

Korea and Malaysia also have a custom of women not changing their names at all after marriage (still not compulsory).



Now that I have listed these countries, especially those who have always had it as a custom for women to retain their maiden names,
What then is the excuse of a Nigerian woman who wants to retain her surname after marriage?

Ahh wait, I think I know the answer going by the OP's third question with the following options:

A. Misguided feminism
B. Social Media insanity
C. Bandwagon disease

The answer is All of the above