₦airaland Forum

Hmmm How do you play this game again?

Why would a man have sex with a pig?? I Mean what Kind of Joke is THIS??!

It's free to Join On 'MOST' Fridays. Sorry I would Have love to help, but I use My friends Account.

Wait Till Friday, Or hopefully someone comes along that can help you out.

Okay the last one posted, Now that is COOL!!!!

Considering How Long I Have Been On Nairaland, Mehn You Know I Have had my Share of FUNNY!!!

Some of The Funniest Things on Here aren't EVEN in the Joke Section oo.

I will think of a couple, and post them here, But I Believe this thread is fast becoming the funniest Thread on NL!!

@Obowunmi, you are a comedian mehnn

Most people would say anything just to fit their personal beliefs.

What in the world??

Masturbation gets you in tuned with Your own body. However, Addiction To Masturbation IS a bad Thing. Just like Too much of everything Is.

niceuzor:
Hot-angel She is Back for very long time

Welcome back girl.

Thanks hunnie. Whoa. . . ! You know me??

Hmmm., this is an interesting topic.

ALl these guys, yapping and yapping around! You people should zip your mouth jare. As if it's not you guys that Taught us (i mean them). lol

Seriously though, I delete Messages because I want to create space for incoming messages.

And i sincerely can't deal with explaining to a guy why "Bolaji" said, He'll see me at 2:00. Or why "sammuel" Said, He loves it when I do that. Or why "Raymond" said, "Lizzy, why do you tease me so much?"

I mean seriously, all those things could be taken as either sexual innuendo's or double entrendes. While in all honesty, Bolaji was just telling me to meet him at 2:00 so that he could give me the book his mom (who happens to be my aunty -- making bolaji my cousin) said he should give me.

In all honesty, Samuel could be saying he loves it when i do that. "THAT" meaning, when I tell him to "shut up and tell my sister who happens to be his 'girlfriend' to come home right now.

In all honesty, Raymond could be telling me I'm a tease because I told him I'm eating rice, and dodo with pomo and shaki.

----

So you see? WHy don't I Just save myself the headache of having to explain arrant nonsense by Deleting messages?

You are talking about TRUST??!?! Ohh Trust me honey, I KNOW all about trust.
WHy don't the guy Trust me enough to know that I'm not hiding things from him, but that I just would prefer not to cause any shenenigan between us?
Why don't he trust me enough to believe that i delete my messages because somethings are better left unseen/unsaid?

Abegggii, close this chapter and bring up the next one jo.

I have no problem showing you my texts. But guys get K-Leg. They will tell you "I have no problem with who sends you stuff".

But when argument time comes, the next thing you'll hear is "WHY DON'T YOU GO AND MEET BOLAJI!!!! If you think I YELL TOO MUCH??!"

They will say "hunnie, you can tell/show me everything"!
But when argument time comes the next thing you'll hear is "How is our uncle 'raymond' doing?" ANd they say it in this irritating voice that you just wanna slap them on the head with frying pan.
This is the same guy you told that raymond was just a friend oo! I mean, COme on noW!!! WHere's the trust ehh?

They will say, show me show me, don't delete don't delete, but when argument starts the next thing is: "Why don't you just go to samuel to do BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH"!

See me see wahalah oo. Ladies I beg Delete All your Inbox Jare!!

Don't even stop there, DELETE THE CALLING LIST! Matter of fact, Give all the guys on your phone Girl Names.

Make Bolaji, Bolatito, and make Samuel Become Samantha. lol, Okay that was a joke!!

I would say That Thunder should fire your mouth, but that would be very unlady-like of me.

You love her, but you believe she's FAT?!?!
What in the name of God and Mankind is that?? Talk about arrant nonsense!!

Hunnie if you love her, you would love every inch and corner of her. Every deep and valley in her body. You think you love her, but I'm sorry to burst your bubbles because you don't sound like a man who loves the woman he's about to marry completely.

It's perfectly alright to notice changes in your partner. But the way you sound (i mean write), doesn't show that you Love your woman. Imagine "She keeps growing fatter and fatter". I still feel the urge to say that Thunder should fire your mouth, but I won't do that!

Now listen. . . If you "love" this woman as you claim to love her, you can talk to her as lovers do. Talk to her with all the love you have for her showing in your eyes, and tell her that you feel she's gaining weight. Hell!! ask her if it's all the preparation for the wedding that is getting to her.
Tell her you could work out with her, because you also want to be in top shape, so that you'll have enough strength to carry her on your wedding day.

THAT alone, would make her reason with you, and want to lose some weight. You'll say it in a way that doesn't make her feel embarrassed!

Don't go about telling people to "HELP!!!! because your wife-to-be is Overwieght"! What the blip?!

I Think it's so cliched to say girls like bad boys.

I mean NOT ALL GIRLS LIKE BAD BOYS!!! You don't have to be a bad boy to be 'fun and unpredictable'. There are descent guys around who are well, descent, and fun, unpredictable and whatever the hell else you can think of.

Ladies who know what they NEED, actually don't want liars in their lives. They don't prefer "Liars/cheaters/abusive partners" to "descent Men". Get it right hunnie, and Get it straight!

Most girls that are dating 'formers and bad guys', don't actually see their guys as 'bad guys'. They just see that they have "very interesting boyfriends". (and before I forget, some ladies claim to be blinded by love, but i believe it's stupidity when something is right in front of you and YOU can't see it)!

It's their friends that'll see the guy for what he is, because they are not head over heels in deep like or love with the dude.
It's also other guys who know that the guy is a 'bad guy', that'll see the girl and be like "She likes bad boys", while in all truth and honesty, the guy could be a 'bad guy'. But as long as he treats his Girl right, she doesn't see him as a 'bad guy'.

Now if a lady dates a man who treats her badly and she chose to stay with him, that's her own cup of tea. But I'll strongly advice that, she gets out of that relationship.

Ladies, who end up getting the 'bad guys' should check themselves before also claiming that all guys are turning gangsta/bad.

I Beg you, remove segun from that List Jare.

I have seen fine fine babies and grown ups named "SEGUN"!

Atilla, There are somethings "we" as human beings, Just know.

Not really,

where is everyone?? I see new faces (names) on NL!!

Actually, mine wasn't hot coffee. It was Powerade.

I was on the bed, drinking powerade, when bam, the bottle thing spilled in a way that i don't even know how to explain, and whossssssshhhhhh, Red liquid on my laptop. Panic came in and i was like, it's not even 3 months yet!!!!!

What did I do? Well, I couldn't do much since the laptop made a "swoooosh" noise and turned off by itself.

I waited, looked at it, and started wiping at it with towel, and trying to pour watever is left inside it out. I wasnt patient enough, so i turned it on after 10 minutes.

As i turned it on, A screen message came on and said My computer was turned off because the power outtage was heated or some english like that.
Click something something to move on.

So i clicked, and my screen was all "bah lah bah lah , like colored T.V gone wrong"!. I started praying, lol. Serious prayers oo. My dad just got it for me, and it's only being 3 weeks. Like everyone said, warranty doesn't cover "liquid pouring on laptop".

The screen kept on shaking, and i turned it off. Then immediately turned it on again. Screen was still the same. Nothing made sense. I turned it off, and started shaking the laptop for watever is left of the powerade to come out.
ANyways, i turned it back on, and left it like that.

In about 20 minutes, it became normal. I guess the heat from it's being turned on, kind of dried up all the left over stuff. And up till date, the laptop is fine.

uhmmm, come to think of it, my mouse pad recently stopped working, but wait, thats because i now have 23% memory space left on my laptop, ohh wait, my laptop is actually not working fine, because the wireless mouse i bought is also not working. And not to forget, everything moves in slow motion now.
Which explains why I'm on my desktop.
[b]
Bottom line: [/b]I Talk too much, and I think that powerade caused all the problems my laptop is having now. SO even if it looks as if everything is working well after the incident, it doesn't mean NOTHING is wrong with the laptop.

Take it to a professional or something. Better yet, take heart and buy a new one. Sell that one to those repair people.

Zainab, I am telling you, i was just about to Say the same thing you are not actually saying. lol.

What in the world was that? I mean I get the point, but this is supposed to be "Lovely text messages" right?

yebarbie:
Poor you.
Did your parents remember to name you Nosa?

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!

WOW!!!!!

I agree with this Post.

You know why? Because i Believe a Woman can make A Man fall in Love with her. Seriously!!!

Do i buy these 'rules' or 'guide'? Well to a certain extent yes. We all have our ways of 'getting what we want'.

And Ladies, you need to stop selling youselves short. If a man can make you fall in Love with him, trust me you can do it too. All you have to do is "BE YOURSELF AND THEN SOME"!