₦airaland Forum

Kondomatic:
I do not want it to be small, it bruises joystick.

Uve got an infection bro

Na only this two pix u get for dis life?

They want our "thing" to be large so as to make deir overused wide pvssy feel small/tight.....while we want deir pvssy small/tight so our less dan average size "thing" can feel large inside deir "oven"....anyone get the logic

Eglobalma:
Una no believe say person fit help una?? Do u know a person i have never met in my life sent me 200k on instagramin february when i was having financial struggles. What i didnt know is people have never seen such favours so they live in doubt. I was like this till February so i think i understand yall now. But its ok lets rest. Mod abeg close thread.

So ur uncle was so generous and he culdnt send u money frm the USA in feb wen u needed it abi? In fact na Thunder go blow u

Eglobalma:
Lol if i was that good a "hacker" why would i need nairaland? Wont i have better sites to hack people from?? Yall should stfu u have no case

A thief is no respecter of where he steals from....every tin is a gain to a thief....pack u and ur uncle one side abeg

Eglobalma:
To those calling me scam, wtf did i ask u to send? Ur proof of school identity, can i scam u with that Ur bank account number can i scam u with that U people know someone chould benefit from this but cuz ur no longer in school u decided to derail the thread. It wont be well for u people who ruined this opportunity for those truly in need. I say that cuz i already backed out the second that bastard called his father a scam

U asked for our school id/school portal page and our bank accounts.....dats enuf infor to scam bro.....wuldnt know how good u are behind a computer....tell ur uncle to find someone in his church sine he's a deacon.

Lewaluv:
Arent u guyz embarass with being with a hoe?

Embarrassed?
Atleast we know she a hoe....it's more embarrassing walking with a gf whose forked the whole bloke in d hood.

Eglobalma:
Nigerians oo, to think i was even 100 percent genuine. No wonder u people are poor oh, u all live in fear and miss out on favours. Wow, this breaks my heart..nigga is from the us and a deacon and wanted to give at least one person assistance before he goes back. Me wey no get friend for uni again cuz i don dey old. I decided to bring it here cuz yall support me when im down with ur comments but the evil few amongst u have ruined it for the good ones. I will die before i continue with this

Oga how can u wanna scam ur country men?
Ure an idiot

mhizminna:
Hmmm some guys will not make heaven sha...just because one or two gurls broke ur heart u now came up wit dis dumb ass write up? Ok let me ask you, if your mother was not a GF to ur father Biko would he marry her? Unless u r trying to say ur mother is a hoe
#dumb ass!

Dey got married few weeks after meeting at her family house....so she was never a gf.
Ur foolishness is actually designed in California and assembled in China.....it's original like the apple products....dumb biatch!

Ur papa, scammer oshi ask him to build u a house r buy u a car

Yea while ur fone is off she wuld be forking anoda guy in her room....in fact my nigger how abt changing ur SIM card and renting a brain

Guys calculate how much u spend on a gf vs how much u spend on hoes/(FWB) ud see a gf is just plain useless.
Some will say it's a gf dat later becomes a wife....fork dat no one wants a liability.

Majority of peeps will saying having one gf is safer and better dan having multiple hoes....but dats not true for the following;
1) Hoes are the most medically conscious gals Ull ever meet, dey are careful abt who sleeps with dem, dey know deir health status up to date....but a gf is very careless abt her health, a gf will fork her male frnd without condom and say it's a mistake, ask ur gf her health status and trust me she will AV no idea of wat ure saying.

2) a hoe knows the money u give her is for sex, and she gives it to u to ur satisfaction....a gf will ask u for money and wen u try to fork her she will say is it cos u gave me money? I AV headache Abeg.

3) a hoe is independent, if she tells u her problem it's usually just to free her mind not so u can help her and wen u do help her she sure gonna pay bk.....if u help a gf, she will see it as ur duty and any favors done is gone with the winds forever.

4) a hoe will help u wen she believes u need help emotionally and financially....a gf will never do dat, if u show a gf ure broke dats wen the calls/texts will reduce, the name of a male frnd will start echoing more frequently.

5) a hoe is honest, u know wat she does, she doesn't AV to hide anything from u....a gf will wanna prove to u she's a good gal, she won't allow u even kiss her whereas she's giving anoda guy blowjobs on a regular.

6) a hoe is like catching a commercial flight or renting a private jet, u pay as u go, what happens to the plane before or after the flight ain't ur bizness.....a gf is like owning a jet, u pay huge to buy, u pay for reg, pay for insurance, pay for the hanger, pay for fuel....so damn wasteful.

7) when a hoes decides she's had enuf and wanna settle down, it's usually final, no ex bf drama.....a gf usually have a nasty fantasy she still wanna explore, she still has an ex bf she doesn't wanna meet cos she still likes him.

a hoe isn't desperate to settle down, she won't rush u for marriage cos she knows even if u leave her anoda guy will come take her.....a gf will be on ur neck 24/7 to marry her to hide her from some shame or the oda, she will say even if na intro, just to rush u to marry her with her rotten secrets.

A hoe will visit u, forks u well and ask for 5-10k.....a gf will kiss u, do one round and ask u to sponsor her birthday party.....forking wasteful bunch.

My gf usually gets tired during sex especially after the 2nd rounds.
After the first round she will shake violently and den calm down, den ill ask her if she's ready to go again she will nod, den the shavings will start occasionally till I cum and den she "blanks out", she will just lay dere motionless....whereas my Dickk still gonna be hard ready to do more.
Pls what culd be the issue?
Isn't she enjoying it?

Gals are just money monkeys...the last gal I brought home also asked for tfare wen leaving I had nothing on me so I offered to drive her home myself, den d biitch got angry o, sed y Shuld I AV to waste fuel dat I Shuld bring money joor....baba and babes I shock

Pls help my life, how do I change from being a serial cheat....I've cheated on every girl I've ever dated....I need to change, getting married soon. What do I do

Last time I took my gf to 3 rounds, she rolled off the bed onto the bed and laid dere naked motionless for 20mins+ {scariest moment of my sex life} and she had no idea what happened wen she woke up.
Some gals just need quickies and off dey go!

She even wants me to cut my beard

U can't sex her ever again bro....if u miss sex after the 1st and 2nd visit/chance it's over bro no sex for u frm dat gal. U weren't fast, romantic and charming enuf, to now make matters worse u tried to force her She will never trust to be alone with u no more bro....u dull.
Me wen a gal says stop...I stop for a min and start all over again. For the fact dat I listened and stop makes her respect and trust me further.

Dude are u a learner?
Haven't u heard of "revenge infection"?
That wen a gal with hiv/std decides in her mind to infect as many guys as possible and the method is to tell guys (esp the ones dey just met) not to use condom.
Never u fork a gal without condom o...in fact if u don't AV condom don't let a gal into ur house if u can't withstand the pressure of sex...trust me lining up to collect free antiviral drug is very embarrassing...I work at NACA I know wat in saying.
As for me though for now till I wed my tool aint entering any hole.

So my gf started dos celibate thing said she doesn't want sex and all dat....I agreed and I must say was difficult for the first 3month dat she had to gimme bj....but now it's been nine months and I no longer get aroused by her.
Before only her smell gets me erect, now even kisses doesn't.
Hope I'm normal sha?
Or should AV I forgotten how to fork?
Or I'm now impotent?
Or should cheat to test if my device still works?

aurxtino:
Hello house, i have been a member of this forum for quite a while now, but i just come here to read up and then leave.
but right now something real painful has happened to me, i met this girl in my final year, and we started dating, i mean i have caught her lie several times but i just ignored, each time i want to come to Nigeria my so called gf always find a reason to tell me not to come you know all that stuffs, i have always suspected her to be a runs girl you know, but i just wanted to catch her red handed. so it all happened i finally came to Nigeria on Tuesday. met her we talked, my gf told me that she would be travelling to Lagos with her elder sister on Friday morning, i said no problem, lo and behold she embarked on a Journey and something told me call her elder sister pretend to be somebody else, and i did. and the elder sister said she is in town. and when i called my gf she said am insulting her calling her a prostitute and all kinds of names, she did not even show any sign of remorse. i just want to end this and go look for a white woman am fed up with Nigerian girls and their lies, i mean what do they really want from a man, and mind you if you are a guy reading this, don't ever love any girl hundred percent and let her know it. else you would end up being broken hearted. thanks house. any advice she is coming back on tuesday or there about. i know she would beg normally. but please house advice me on what to do.

Lolzzz sebi na person wey get heart dem dey break him heart....become a Yoruba demon all u AV to do is give us ur heart and we give u the starter kits.

pitbully:
Yeah, i'm stoned as f@$k....In the spirit of Easter, I guess?

Mks me feel 'spiritual', you know, closer God. :

So kinda want to know how it makes y'all feel.

First time I took weed I ate 2derica of rice and a N250 bread with coke and slept off for 9hrs+
Then the next time I puffed menh felt I was in a meeting with the angels but in reality was with my guys talking about buying dangote group from dangote....we were so serious I remember calling a lawyer. Weed is the realest things known to mankind bro.

Most time gals walk around looking for rich guys to cling to, forgetting dat wen it comes down to it, it's always a rich guy marrying a rich gal. There has never been a marriage of unequal wealth level dat has ever been successful...here are some reasons to avoid broke gals;
1) they are demonic, the will use deir brokenness to drag ur progress in life.
2) they will always suggest to become housewives after wedding...dey will say taking care of the home is a job (idiots)
3) you will become the funders of their families (Ull e responsible for her siblings and parents)
4) she's gonna cheat on u weneva ure a little broke
5) she will be wasteful cos she won't know the value of money after all she has never worked for it or had it much in her life
6) it's embarrassing to ur circle of friends
7) ur parents will be disappointed in you
u won't live long cos all the family pressure will be on only u.
9) then dis senerio will happen in ur homes (kids; mommy I want sweet, mom; go and meet ur dad. Kids; mommy we need books in sch, mom; go and meet ur daddy) cos she forking broke.
10) ur kids will hate u for giving dem a lazy broke ass mom.

So my gf asked me for money for Easter I swiftly told her I'm broke but dat I'll sed her 2k to manage.....but while transferring the money I mistakenly sent her 20k.
Now she won't return my 18k balance...why are gals like dis, imagine she's even telling me "se u sed u don't AV money" on top my money o.
I'm about to go crazy...it's not like I'm stingy I just don't want her to know I AV money!
Pls how can I get the 18k balance bk??

princedmiayer:
OK..I don't want say am the most handsome, but I get lots of hello from the opposite sex(females) who would like to be a friend, some will say girlfriends others want to marry me.. even those way older than I am. I be like ah..when I shun them by not giving my phone number to them ,the will be like am doing Sankara...
ah shakara again for my own number..
please maybe, I don't know the right way to say no, without making them feel like hurt or bad.

In other words ure asking us how not to give ur fone number to a gal?
How old are u?
Ure not dat handsome...u should loose some weight ur check bones are hurting.

My desire to get rich isn't so a gal can say yes to me or not...I wanna get rich cos I love been rich.
I need guys to AV dat mentality stop pursuing wealth to impress this hoes...pursue wealth for ur own good.

Idiot u dey find pvssy abi?
So no woman dey ur compound? Workplace? Church/mosque abi?
God purnish dat ur prick

Missionary; April 2016
Doggy; Aug 2016
Mouth Gig; with my hot female boss at work

Tell her ure looking for ur fone and she should help u call ur fone with her's....when it rings, ask for her name, thank her and walk away.

Benelovelace:
if ur heart bcoms myn,u'll b dead

Ure not so intelligent,