₦airaland Forum

mhisbliss:
ok, it was good until you mentioned sports betting and funeral services so officially you're advising us to be gamblers or wierdos capable of tearing people's guts, yuck I'll pass

Have you seen any bundle of money that had written how it was made all over it? Sports betting is an industry of its own and it has started long before you were born. Funeral services too. Maybe deceased people should be left to rot everywhere for you to appreciate them.
He even forgot to write 'shit business'.

oluwasegun400:
A young man allegedly stabbed his neighbor on the chest on Monday for selling him a phone with a faulty battery.
The sad incident happened at Ibe street, Orji, Imo state at about 3:15pm. The suspect ran away after he noticed that the deceased died instantly.


He was later apprehened and handed over to the police.


See the graphic pic below;

Source:http://www.flexygist.com/2016/08/30/graphic-photo-man-stabs-neighbor-to-death-for-selling-him-phone-with-faulty-battery-in-imo-state/

People can tell stories just to label some actions 'terrible'. Tell the full story and not just 'he bought phone, then stabbed the seller to death because of common faulty battery'. There may have been altercation and grappling and 'I nor go return ya money, do anythin wey you like' etc It rarely happens as people say.

DrMaths:
Nairaland is one funny place where people come to read latest happenings and to cool off. The most interesting part on the forum are the comments, where you get to read other peoples view on a particular matter and either respond or contribute. Now, the juicy parts of the comments are the hilarious ones, some of the comments are so funny, you can even crack a rib while laughing.
Personally, i prefer scrolling through comments on nairaland than buying ticket to attend comedy shows.
Thus, the following list came from closed observation on some of the most used cliche or slangs (as the case may be) that appear as comment on nairaland threads.
From the list to the greatest
Leggo
15. Iranu Abasa
Ever since Lil kesh used it in a song, nairalanders have decided to to partake in it. its mostly used when describing things that are unpleasant .

14. Have you Blame GEJ Today
This one is mostly found on threads where Lai Mohammed is relating the present Economy crisis to the immediate past administration

13. Who U EPP
Who dollar Epp, Who Pilgrimage Epp, Who Bleep Don Epp. Olamide surely gave nairalanders a comment kick starter.

12. End Time
End Time Baby, End time Girlfriend, End Time Pastors, End Time data Plan, End Time Mod. Just name it, naliralanders will End Time It.

11. GEJ My Hero
Temitemi started this campaign sometime last year, till date it still rocks on any thread where GEJ is being Exaclted.

10. Wasteners
I'll Pass

9. IPOB Youth
On nairanland, any monicker that support PDP or is Anti-the present administration is labelled an IPOB youth.

8. Change the Change
you see this on threads where it seems as if the wailers are winning the war.

7. Ugandan Brothers
I'll Still Pass

6. Lala and Snake
You will surely see this one on any snake thread that hits the frontpage. i fear for those moniker that use this one sha , if not because Lalasticlala is gentle, imagine if it was someone like Jim Iyk that is Lalasticlala.

5. Guess Who Is Wailing?
This one comes up when a well known Supporter of the Ruling party starts wailing. Some will even go as far as warning other Wailers not to give Wailers Form to the Repentant Soul.

4. Pictures You Will Relate With
This One Started As a child's Play until Smellymouth and Susan404 started adding spices to it. Even Photoshoot used it as a campaign strategy during the Mr Nairaland Competition.

3. Kenya and sex related news Be Like
And picture of the man with his two index fingers pointing forward will do the magic.

2. Afonjo Brothers
Still Passing!!!

1. I Came Here to Check Names
I present to you the "NAME CHECKERS ASSOCIATION OF NIGERIA" (NCAN).
This one is found on virtually all the threads that hit the frontpage on nairaland these days. The good thing about the monikers that used this one is that they have branches everywhere in the universe, included Mars and Jupiter.

Add Yours
Source: Drmaths

Op whatever it means.

ladyF:
Happy for her. Maybe one day, LadyF will be on the future N5,000 note...

Baba God pick up my call.

It's [size=15pt]LadyF[/size] again

Don't worry, when God picks your call you will tell him your talent is hunting for 'first to comment' on Nairaland and your picture should appear on the next thread.

KingBelieve:
You forgot no APC member can be probed let alone go to jail

You're right.

KingBelieve:
Gravest allegation but if true, he should sign his resignation letter immediately

Resignation only? Whatever happened to 24 years imprisonment for examination malpractices and falsification of results? He should go to jail in my opinion.

SafeAlhaji:
So buhari is the sport minister abi? if you miss Gej why cant you pack you baggages and pay him a visit, oshii ati iregbe

Baggage not baggages. He is not far from the truth. Buhari is Minister of Finance, Petroleum (until recently he appointed his brother) , CBN governor, and chief 'scrurity' oppicer. Dalung is only foolish as much as you can throw him but everyone is quite handicapped by the Chief 'scrurity oppicer' who has refused to fund anything but Hajj travels.

olatunji21:
Boycott the match and come back home abeg..What's with the threat every time, u got 11days allowance 3days ago, now na match bonus, after 2moro's match anoda complain...

Are you really okay? 11 days allowance out of how many months? Really, it's zombies like you that feel Buhari is correct whatever stupid actions he takes. If those boys don't get paid today, they will almost never get paid again. The change government is owing salaries upandan no sign or hope of being paid. Siasia has not been paid for 5 months, you are busy calling his bluff. You cannot endure same. So keep mute and let the 'I too know' government continue their monumental disgrace parade.
Keshi just passed on, what happened? Nothing at all. Abi you want them to die serving an ungratefull country too?

Omo strike is the way to go my folks. If they don't get paid now (God forbid they lose) then the Daura dollard and the Lying Muhammed will tell them tomorrow that PDP used the money meant to pay them yesterday to rig election in 2015. Nothing works again.

Skryptchex:
So, what is wrong If Nigerians start saying there own english??

Nothing, only thing is we produce dumber youths that come on air to embarrass the whole nation. If you can't speak English stick to your native language, nobody will beat you. But if English is the official language of your country then it is essential you know it to a logic extent (SSCE/WAEC). Instead most of you come here writing "am going", "is it there own?", etc.
I still repeat, if anyone wrote his/her SSCE/WAEC alone and obtain a C minimum, most common errors in written and spoken English will not be in him/her.
I don't know what some smartarse guys will be defending mediocrity for yet expect Arsenal to win the league every year.

Nooooo, I don't like this. There's an option. If Jonathan said same thing the Lying Muhamed would pounce on him like a roaring lion ready to devour.

DropShot:
Okowa's Advert Celebrating A Convicted Ibori


It's save to say Nigeria has no good future with the caliber of leaders we have especially in the SS/SE. I can only imagine what barrage of condemnation will trail this act of wasteful and immoral display if the governor was from Lagos or any of the Northern states.

Your impecable president still says that Abacha was not corrupt.
In as much as I don't like what 'Oke'owa did, leave people to form their own opinions.

Iphesure212:
This is hurting. You should try seeing a therapist and have someone close to talk it out with. To unburden your heart and improve your relationship with ur husband

With all the therapists in oyibo land, they still churn out more divorces than we will have in next ten years.
Ask your husband why he married you abeg initio. Whether it was to do genuflection to him all day long, kiss his arse daily, or to be his companion. Ask him face to face. Tell him he's destroying the union with his archaic attitude.
Yes a wife should respect her husband at all times but, once there is love and understanding, somethings don't reek of such evil. Or did he marry a robot to respect and greet him all times?
Another is check your self. I don't always subscribe to that school of thought that the man is always wrong at home. Most reactions of men are basically reactions from salient actions of the wife. Many women drive their husbands crazy, but the guys just pretend all is well at home only to seek succurr outside. Non is good. So try to be what you expect him to be.
Have a happy married life.

Akinz0126:
I don't like this mourinho of a Coach Thesame mistake he has been making ever since he had been coaching Chelsea he did thesame when he coached Madrid and that always leads to his waterloo.Now he has started again he'll definitely live Man U in shamble just watch out!!!

Why do you guys just yap anyhow out of emotions? The coach gave a logical explanation for his decision but it is the opinion of one unsuccessful footballer turned pundit that holds more sway hmm? I didn't see any mischief in his actions because at first I thought Mata was injured but got wind of info later why he was taken off. Suppose Mata remained and Utd went ahead to lose the game most of you would still yap about his tactics. I'm not an ardent Mourinho fan, but he is the boss. He calls the shots. A van Gaal would not even play Rooney, Martial, Dea Gea, etc siting lack of game time prior to the match. So this is Manchester United.

Go to Delta state, you'll know the difference between kickbacks and bribes. They negotiate percentages of your money sef.

Shym3xx:
Utter boring game - both teams lack flair.

Big Mou doesn't look good coaching these clowns...very awkward watching him as the coach of a next team. Especially a team of perennial cheaters and devils lol.

Is pure jealousy or envy spilling from your keyboard?

Solitin40:
And you are Happy when my bro had only 3 Bs and the rest A1....Anyway she tried congrats

Ehen, which miracle centre or private school did your sister sit for the exam?

If he likes he should sleep inside for all I care. Until I get one installed in my house, he is still all barks no bite to me.

Truly speaking it's not an offense, just 'change'.

Kante misses out on this.

ifybaby555:
i'm actively involved in various online biz that yield multiple streams of income every month. I earn as much as 50k extra apart from my salary.

Any one intrested can quote me & i'll link you up.

Really?

AnonyNymous:
mobrog.com , but you won't really make that much money there. Prob like 2k in a month. You can also check crowdflower.com but the work/reward ratio is tiny, you answer questions from companies that need Human responses and based on the level, you get paid per question. Like $0.06 per question.

Okay.

dan56:
http://fiverr.com
http://fivesquid.com
http://pushnaira.com
http://peopleperhour.com

Okay.

princeonx:
I still no get how or why people kill themselves!!
He must have a China heart/mind.

Just pray 'the lord lead you not into temptation and deliver you from every evil '. If you get to know evil, you'd know how easy it is for your mind to yearn suicide.

sanky346:
http://www.thisdaylive.com/index.php/2016/07/31/wedding-across-the-seas-bola-tinubu-takes-the-rich-and-famous-to-milan-for-sons-marriage/

Shabi the idiots will come and tell other peoples children to 'buy Nigeria, to grow their head '? Propagandists.

blackprowler:
Must Nigerian government give everybody something? Which kain country be dis? Poor people that have never earned a kobo from government do die and get buried by their families. Keshi had an illustrious career by Nigerian standards, but which one be government own inside. You want us to start calculating the money he made from the Nigerian government? Keshi was one of the very first Nigerian players to lead a boycott of the national team because of money issues. I was alive then. Go and check the lineup of Algiers '90 Nations Cup. Rashidi Yekini was the most patriotic Nigerian football player I ever knew. He refused to join the Keshi-led strike. Westerhof led a completely new generation of Nigerian players after that incident and it heralded the golden generation of Nigerian football (1990-2000). Go and ask older people that know better. Up till today, or billionaire football players still milk this poor country in order to play football while hardworking and intelligent people go to waste for lack of opportunity. What is football? I blame Nigerians

As Ya'ardua die, them for leave am for hin family to bury nau, afterall na 'Nigerian' too.

talktonase:
The same nigerians will be complaining that some people cannot recite national anthem.Please who national anthem help?

God bless you real good.

HungerBAD:
There is dignity in silence.

This Keshi's son should learn how to close his mouth,so he does not turn our sympathy for his family into a political discuss.

Your father has not even been buried,and you want to pick a fight with the Government?are you serious?

Nigeria mourns your dad,but we owe him nothing. Your father did not serve Nigeria for free,there are those that died doing things for Nigeria for free,and their family have been gracious not to politicize anything.

There have been hundreds of Corpers,who have died serving this Country. There have been hundreds of Military people who died fighting Boko Haram.

There was Rashidi Yekini and Samuel Okwaraji,and countless others who never got the kind of money your father made from Nigeria,but even served more than him.

Yet you ungrateful lad is still complaining.

What exactly did you want from the Government?when your father left Nigeria,he went to Togo. So what does this mean?it means he was a mercenary who served different countries.

All life is special,and your dad's death is not more important than the death of any other Nigerian.

Go take a look at the videos of Boko Haram slitting the throats of our Soldiers,and yet your father died of a natural cause,far richer than the Soldiers getting their throats slit for the Country.

This over pampered boy should keep his mouth shut,and mourn his dad with dignity.

Your advice should be adhered strictly by you. Shh.

Oya, let the shooting and bombing begin.

robosky02:
7 Blunders of Nigeria Sports

This is not in any way to radicles our nation but a wake up call to do things right in the sports sector.


1 Appointing Mikel Obi as the as captain of team Nigeria to the Olympics.:

When we have the likes of Segun Toriola and others like Blessing Okagbare with more olympic experience than Mikel. The man Toriola Is Africa’s most successful table tennis player of all-time, Nigeria’s Segun Toriola will be competing in his seventh Olympics at Rio 2016, the 41-year-old having appeared at every Games since Barcelona 1992.

https://www.olympic.org/news/record-breaking-toriola-ready-for-games-no7

Was Mikel appointed captain of Team Nigeria or Flying Eagles? Please clarify.

Benita27:
When he dumps you, you can go extra miles to harm him, because of all you gave.

How about the other way round, do you expect him to harm her based on what he gave her in the event that the relationship crashes?

holluwai:
Yea picked up yesterday and sentenced and going to jail today.

Wish our so called leaders/looters can get such judgement.

No, they don't have as many looters and criminals as we do.