₦airaland Forum

Chinom:
Ol' boy, your sense of equality is warped. The fact that men don't feel uncomfortable with s.exist comments from women only serves to confirm that we are not equal. If we were equal or rather if society considers us equal, then s.exist comments and sexual harassment should carry the same weight irrespective of the gender.

If a woman pinches my butt, I laugh it off. If I pinch a woman's butt, I could go to jail for that. Maybe, this answers your question about how women are more protected by the society. I know the laws are there, but try convincing a Judge that a women raped you. You will be considered a clown. People will just laugh at you. Societal perceptions affects the ways laws are implemented. And this favours women big time.

craziebone:
the fact is...nature makes it in such a way that men are disposable, that's why even though Almajiri is synonymous with boys, the society is more likely to talk about the girl child that was handed in marriage the socity would rather build government girl's college. At the last count, there are 10 million almajiri boys out there.

The issue of homelessness among men is there. What about crime rate? That is still there. It is ingrained in the psyche of the human being to see men as a threat and that's why most extrajudicial killings are almost 100percent men! The society doesn't seem to take note of male issues very much if anything, it is more interested in what he is not doing right.

You are the one who is seeing the advantages and disadvantages. The likes of Chimamanda, who are responsible for shaping policies around the world, do not see this. That's why she talks only of a male privilege.

And we are saying no, there are some 'privileges' we cannot do anything about and this also goes for women. The fact that the human being feels a natural sympathy for women, is a privilege.

This all important privilege is the reason feminism took could achieve things in the first place. If it took feminism 50 years to get its message across, it will take the MRA 200 years to achieve half that feat. Men already understand what women have to go through and that's why there is a ministery of women affairs, there is more research to find cure to cancer that affects women even though those cancers kill fewer women than postrate cancer kills men. I have also mentioned the government girls college. What about the preferential treatment given to women when it comes to boarding the school shuttle? What about parents giving more pocket money to their female children than they do their males? What about the more visiting days parents attend in girls boarding houses than they attend in boys?

iPopAlomo:
How many women have been forced to resign/sued/sacked for a sexist comments made to a guy or another woman...?

All these woman wrapper men on nairaland sef...

Chinom:
Yes, I know it is an extreme situation. I was using it to buttress the point that there are situations in which men are singled out just for BEING A MAN. That terrorist or kidnapper never asked who was more educated, richer or more beautiful. No, we are chosen based purely on our gender.

Same thing happens in most military and para-military formations. I just think that women should be happy the way things are now. There is absolutely no need for any form of feminist movement anno 2015. We are getting along just fine as it is. Most women in Islamic societies, as well as rural communities are just comfortable with their lives as it is. It's all these Western educated, city women that are trying to create an imaginary problem.

Chinom:
Women are always quick to play the 'feminist card' when it suits them. When they will be positively favoured. But when the crazy terrorist or kidnapper decides to shoot me first just for being a man, the women will never step in the name of equality to be shot as well.

Men bear a lot in this world just for being a man. Women should just be happy and grateful for being a woman because the world favours them in a million ways. We, men don't get 10% of the sort of protection women get.

loomer:
She wasn't silly, she just felt loved.

You may not know, but so many fat girls get depressed if no man ask dem out not to talk of marry.
So if even person wey wowo like me ask am out she go gree, because all she's searching for is happiness.

jaybee3:
I guess you see them as demigod and no point telling you how they view me at my office.

Run along!

5minsmadness:
Hesitate ko, she didn't hesitate o! You didn't see where op said she immediately took the gun and pulled the trigger

nelandrewz:
A newly wedded couple were being rubbed, the robber gave the gun to the husband and said he should shoot the wife and be killed, the husband started crying and begged for mercy, the rubbers took the gun and gave it to the wife to shoot the husband or she'll be killed, [size=16pt]immediately[/size] she pointed the gun at the husband and pulled the trigger, unfortunately, the gun wasn't loaded. The rubbers laughed, took the gun and left. QUESTION: if you were the husband, what will you do? Will you still keep her as your wife?

EfemenaXY:
Her concerns run deeper than that. Finance is a real issue here, and remember, she did mention that he is retired - so very limited source of funds assuming he's receiving some sort of pension from the state.

EfemenaXY:
I don't think she's necessarily being selfish, but concerned.

True, her father has the right to live his life and be happy, but he also has an obligation to look after his very dependent children. From what she's posted, he's got 3 of them to look after (financially).

Krisgift: You mention that your dad's retired. So does this new lady (his intended wife) have a supporting means of income? Does she work? If not, how does your dad intend to look after you lot, himself, his wife-to-be, and the kids they might have from the union assuming she's of childbearing age?

You're twenty-one and and adult. So I think you should have a polite (and respectful) heart-to-heart with your dad and table your concerns to him, and hear what he has to say.

I'm suggesting this on the assumption that you've got a good father-daughter relationship between you both?

mulanbaba:
ok , i will start from the beginning Hubby and i met in University.I was a virgin but not because of religion as such, i just chose to wait for the one thats all. We have been married for 12years now and i can safely say it was happily so until three months ago,when i found out that he has been having an affair with my best friend and kicked him out of the house.

now since then all my married friends have been on my case that i am pushing him into the other womans arms etc,and that i shouldnt hev come that close to single woman. No one is recognising that i am deeply hurt, i am depressed, i cant even clean my house or bath my kids and myself. i am in this deep dark hole and i have contemplated suicide

i had to get sick leave from work because i feel incapacitated right now, i can barely leave the house unless i fetch the kids from school. i had to hire a maid cos even cooking wasnt possible.

Now all the advices i am getting is how i must not push him away and still act as a wife and stop being hurt and forgive him as if one can just stop coughing even though they have TB!!,
coming to our marriage we have always had a kinky sex life so there is no position available that we havent tried axcept anal cos he is not interested. i am a very open minded person so he knows no subject is a taboo between us, but he knows that cheating and abuse are a deal breaker for me.

He has shown remorse and hev been apologising but my pain is just so deep right now. i hev asked him why and he doesnt hev any reasons because i had even suggested we explore swinging to spice our sex life which he said a big NO. So i am so confused cos i know i am a good looking woman who doesnt look older than 23 and i work out so am very toned and i do get attention a lot from other men still. so why did he do it? and why are people more concerned about him than my pain? at the moment i really dont care whether other woman take him or not because i feel injured and the wound is very deep.

so ladies please help me understand why should i be the one acting as if its my fault even though my heart is bleeding?

Timbuktou:
Do the teachers in your own school grade whether an answer is right or wrong based on line of reasoning or fact?

Timbuktou:
How many times have you conscientiously written answers in a test only to find out later that your opinion was wrong. Sweety, it's not really by how innocent or honest you are. It is important to learn tact in managing relationships. Let's not be sentimental about this issue.

raumdeuter:
I have hardly seen someone who claims to have a temper problem beat up a soldier, an Agbero, his boss or a man in power, Its only equals they flex power for

raumdeuter:
People claim they have temper problems when dealing with their equals,

How come these people with temper problems dont display it when they see someone physically stronger than them, a soldier, their boss at work, Or governor Fashola, Agbero at bus stop etc

But they would see a weak wife, friend or househelp and decide to show that they have temper problems

I would think your problem should not discriminate on the personality

Temper problems is either a display of innate insecurity or just to flex your power

adonismuller:
Even though she wasn't hungry she should have taken a bite,s[b]he made the mother in-law feel she is scared of her being poisoned[/b]

Btw,they ate before leaving,how come the husy to be is eating?

CountDracula:
A dolphin isn't stvpid either bt stil doesn't understand d human language, wats ur point?

CountDracula:
Hw wil u knw ur parents are fake if u can't understand d meanin of fake/real? These ar kids nt adults pls try and understand

CountDracula:
I dnt agree wit dat, if u apologize to a child d child wud feel ur imperfection and knw u can't always b ryt, d child won't see u as a moral compass anymore... Its like havin a computer dt u found out is liable to mistake, wil u stil hav complete trust in it?

5minsmadness:
None of you have asked her what the man means when he says it's her fault

@tearoses
Dontim1
innervoice
Rudebouy
taryour

fibonacciseries:
I can't really explain. It looks as if he's possesed. I don't think it's ordinary. He masturbates at home when there's no prostitute or any of his strange women available.