₦airaland Forum

KingTom:
Nkwerre in Imo state to see my maternal grandparents, Enugu to say my elder sister. Abia, my babe. Anambra to visit my little sis in Madonna. Ebonyi, just fascinate myself with their rice mill

Hey doc, your matter sef don taya de devil.

KingTom:
Very often

Where exactly do you go in the east?

smallpeepee:
R u sexier dan our own juliesexy?

KingTom:
I'm Yoruba, my mum is Igbo

How often do you go to your mum's?

KingTom:
AdaEze

You can say that again.

Are you Igbo?

You have no reason to cheat on your husband. If you're not happy in the marriage, walk away. No reason whatsoever. Even if he cheats on you...

JoeCutie:
Awww. Ayam sorry oh. Do you still have it?

I'm not having any big party oh.
Je n'ai beaucoup d'argent. J'ai petite d'argent.

Yeah, I still have do. You said I should keep it for you.

And no matter how small your party is, I must attend.

JoeCutie:
Night class!

I stopped going for night class the night I stepped out to ease myself, and then I saw two people lashing under the stairs. E no get wetin I no hear from under the stairs covered in darkness... Ranging from "Harder!" To "Oh, my God", "Don't stop", "Oh, Jesus Christ of Nigeria". Tell me...is Jesus Christ from Nigeria? Or she meant the guy that was giving it to her from the back?

100 level boys?
Na so their eye don tear just now now?
Hehe. Uniben girls are in for a long thing.

Why would someone go as far as raping? What manner of konji could cause that? Do they not know where halls 1&2 are? By they time they try toasting like 12 girls, at least one or two must say Yes. WTF?!

You only see bad things, why?

JoeCutie:
They don first break your head before? Watch out!

Your boy abi? Okay, your boy is hungry. Anything for me?

What do you want? You still haven't collected the wrist watch I got for you since February.

And your birthday is this month, right?
Wow! So you won't invite me for the party abi?

JoeCutie:
This is the current state of Oliver's kitchen in my lodge. So dirty.

Lool. Amebo.

I'll change your name from JoeCutie to JoeAmebo.
You like it, right? That's my boy.

JoeCutie:
My brother, that's the kind of life I'm striving to build for myself. Not a reckless or a wayward life, but a life where I'd spend money without having to think my brains out, simply knowing that more money is on the way. That's the real deal. Not a life where you'll have to check your account (airtime) balance, contemplate and pray over it before you make a minute phone call. Isn't that frustrating?

If you're in "MTN Zone", you'll have to wait all your life, or more to that, trek oooooo...until you get to an area where the call rate is relatively low. I know a guy who does this. Chai! That one na life?!

Imagine... Mayweather, in one of his interviews, said he buys houses and cars for fun. That they are like toys to him. What impudence! Money! Owo!! Ego!!!

I want to ask you something, Joe: Why are you so f*cking funny?

Thanks for making me laugh jawe. My weekend has been poor. Very annoying and heartbreaking.

I wish you are/were here...at least I'll laugh. I'm very sure of that.

JoeCutie:
Say what?
For your mind...


Mehn! Stop oooooh! My head is at the edge of bursting. If I die today, you caused it.
Thanks though.

You don't want to admit abi? It's okay oh.

Abeg don't die oh. I still need you oh. We all do biko.

JoeCutie:
Well, I'm happy to hear that. Someone said exactly the same thing in her diary just yesterday. Thanks, Jul.

Your new P. Picture? Awesome!
Stop already! You're confusing some N'land guys, putting them on reverse.

Some N'land guys like you?
Just say it already, it's allowed.


Thanks for the compliment. Yours look even better. You look real sexy & hot. Cutie.

JoeCutie:
She doesn't imbecilize herself - bending her right leg like a crippled beggar at a toll-gate & shaking the left one like a virgin who has just gone 77 rounds - while taking pictures. And does she pout? No!

Lmao!

You've got depth, and that's very impressive; hope you know that?

Very funny dude!

leofab:
so does that mean you don't expect appreciation either verbal or financial after having sex with him? Make Ashawo's dem nor hear am from you. Funny things is that guy will still want to satisfy ashawo's too after paying #10k or more for just a night. Life shaaaa

I don't expect any appreciation from him after sex. If at all anybody needs to show appreciation, that has to be me. Unless he just feels like...

As for the guys who go about mounting ashas and trying to please them after paying some hefty amounts, that's there own wrap of weed. Not my concern.

JoeCutie:
As in ehn...
I've always said it, sex is 50/50. I don't know why ladies have this very funny mentality. In fact, they should be grateful to us men, because they are the ones enjoying the strokes, while the men suffer.

You'd stroke, stroke, stroke, stroke and stroke. You'd do everything and just when you're about to... You'd just hear, "Harder!". Har gini?

Then after all these things, they still see themselves as doing us a favour. Any girl that'd tell me that rubbish ehn... Issorai.

This boy! This bad boy!!! Werey! What is harder? And that comes when you're about to do what? Looool.

Well, if I have sex with someone, I don't see it as doing a favour for him; I see it as being satisfied by him, knowing fully well that I've also satisfied him. That's equal 'favour' after all. But then, why would someone see sex as favour? As a means of payment? Paying someone back for what they did for you? To me, that's madness and it's degrading. If I want to have sex with you, I'd have sex with you; not just for you but for myself; or rather, for us.

And Joe... I thought you said you're a V?!

JoeCutie:
Nobody ever taught me how to drive. I sneaked into mumsi's room, grabbed her car keys, rushed to the garage, started the engine and zoomed off. I went to the market, bought things and came back.

When mumsi noticed that her car was missing, she knew it was me. She was worried as I had not driven before. She hurried outside the gate, by then my phone had been long turned off. She waited outside the gate. When she saw me driving back, she didn't know it was me, she thought it was a cab man. I honked and flashed the headlights at her and sped into the compound. At that point, I was already prepared for whatever outcome I might face. Contrary to my fears, my mum just walked up to me at the garage and said, "This boy... I'll never doubt you again. Never!". From then, I turned my mum's unofficial driver.

I've since driven many cars (auto & manual) including bus. Nobody taught me one day how to do all these things. I'm very observant. I observe, I apply what I observe. I just don't get it when people spend weeks, even months learning how to drive in every field they see. Well...

That's my Lewis Hamilton. Do you want to be a Bus driver?

Jeez! You look sexy, cute and dapper in your profile picture. Wow!

missterious:
I was already thinking of how to break up jejely. Lol.

If it's true, I'll kill him. He knows why.

Lmao. That guy is a case on it's own. So of all things, that was what he could prank you with? Joe is mean. He's very funny.

Maybe before you find out, it would have been too late.
But no; I don't think he can be that mean. You know him better anyways, what do you think? Do you think he's capable of doing such thing?

missterious:
Boyfie told me he has a child with someone else. I swallowed it, hook, line & sinker. As in, he even gave details about how the girl stays in SA with his sister & his mum goes often to visit them. Chai.

Choi! That's brutal. Wickedness! What was your reaction?

But wait oh... what if it's true after all?

JoeCutie.

He's cute.
He has a cute name
He has a cute diary
He has a cute sense of humour
He has a cute online personality


Hey! Mind you, he has a cute girlfriend too.
He's just JoeCutie.

jacksparrow1207:
What are u waiting for? Woo me

Sorry, dear. I don't think I want to participate again.

D1ck:
Woo me?

No, dear, I'm sorry.

D1ck:
U're wlcm.... Any1 to woo yet?

Nope

D1ck:
Juliesexy and Misclasssy.... The most awesomely awesome and delicious names!!!

Hehe. Thanks.

Vickybee:
Nice wooing lines.

Jeezz! Babe, you're so on point. Your head dey there jare.

And some dude thought he's smart; still pressuring me to woo Joe without knowing that I'm already half way into the something.

Blackett:
So woo the fvck outta him.

Cc naijaboiy.

I'd have loved to, but he's not available. I know him, he'd not like to be involved with this kinda stuff. He'd dodge it. Not rejection though.

JoeCutie:
...but he's not available?

Lmao! Is he?

Blackett:
Fear of rejection.

Rejection? Dude!!!

The JoeCutie I know would never reject me. Never.

JoeCutie:
She does exist. Still a good girl, not very bad girls like you.

And I'm sure you prefer 'bad girls' to 'good girls'.

Blackett:
. . .but you're scared of losing.

loosing what I've not even started? Nah. He just might be might misunderstood.

Never mind, you won't understand.

I would have loved to woo JoeCutie but...