₦airaland Forum

JoeCutie:
You don't necessarily need to know about her before you can meet her. Just keep looking out for a young, charming, soft, beautiful, hot, jazzy, shy, fragile & calm yellow pawpaw. If you see someone whom you think matches this description, she's the one. But if any of these stated attributes is missing, keep looking.


Notify me as soon as you find her.

JoeCutie:
I think this love of a thing is more than how we view it sometimes. I think how much you love people again, has to do with how important they are to you. How valuable. If it's a wife who causes you pain all the time and without showing enough remorse, even if you have an impeccable and unquestionable love for her, it's only natural that this love would diminish or even die off over time.

It's easier to love our parents for the obvious reasons. With our partners, it's different, as there's no natural and biological inclination there. It's just a totally different journey - adventure - which the both of you have agreed to take up.

I for one, am hoping to love my mum and my wife equally. And I've every reason to... Unless any of them proves otherwise.

JoeCutie:
You be winch? Where have you been flying to?

JoeCutie:
Yes! Yes!! Yes!!!
No time to cry, we have a PL to win.

Which drink I go buy you that day?

JoeCutie:
This stupid "African Mentality" has killed many of our youths. It is a cankerworm which has eaten deep into our bone marrow.

The integrity and probity of your country - the so called giant of Africa, which as a matter of fact, should set the pace for others to follow - is at stake, in doubt, and in fact, has been thrown to the dust, and this is all you could say? Well, it's unfortunate. We, the youths of this country have bought into the bad ideas, mundane mentality and selfishly bitter politicking of these old fools we call leaders today. We need to liberate our future and fast. Our future is caged by these same people we are running mad for. 

God have mercy.

JoeCutie:
LIES!!!
Whoever said that is a liar.
What are people saying sef?

Is it an abomination for something to spoil again?
Can't something spoil and be repaired again?
Maybe the seat got bad, and I'm sure they are planning to repair it, cos nobody would pay for a flight ticket and then agree to fly sitting on such trap. It would be repaired. EOD!

Nigerians! Our blood too dey hot. Our body too dey sweet us. We no dey get patience. We too dey judge. And I say it again, we can SLAM for the entire Universe.

Your Papa moto never spoil before, before he go repair am again? Abi you think say plane sef no dey spoil too? Na winch?
Look clearly. Not as if people are onboard the plane ready for take off, or even on the air already. The beast is just parked, maybe even waiting for services and repairs. Why don't you buy a flight ticket, board the flight with the rest of the passengers and then take a picture and post, let's see if there would be spoilt seats. In a flight, there's nothing like "attach", standing, lapping someone, or even sharing seats. Everything is standard. There's much comfort because you paid for it and the money no be Crayfish money. You can't pay a minimum fare of #8,000 and compromise your safety & comfort by accepting to sit on such seat. Never!

Wait, na only the seat you see? You no see those telly? Abi you think say na every plane dey get television? Abegi!

JoeCutie:
This is serious.
Mourinho is a great coach, but there are things he needs to change about his approach to football.

PSG is no match with Chelsea!
They come to the Bridge...
Their most important player sent off in the first half
You're still playing defensive against them?
C'mon! That's an insult.

Chelsea has what it takes to go all out and win games in an emphatic form. It's unfortunate those talents are going down the sea since José is always hellbent on going defensive.
He should just change that mentality already. It's killing us.

If it's a team like Arsenal, they'd wire this PSG with goals. PSG no reach na

Nne eh, I dey vex.

Nicur:
how market?

JoeCutie:
CHELSEA!!!

Where's that beautiful blue babe - Juliesexy!!
Where are you?

JoeCutie:
The very first time I went for night class, I saw two people making out at one of the buildings' balcony.

The second day I tried it again, I saw two people again eating hot early morning food - banging - under the stairs.

The third time I... Shut up! There was no such thing as a third time. If na you, you go still go? I don't wanto goan die of konji alone.

JoeCutie:
Happy 10th Anniversary, Nairaland.

Congratulations to you, Seun Osewa. Despite all the hitches, you still manage to keep it all going. It's never easy, but you're succeeding. Kudos.

Congratulations to the team who have strongly backed the oga at the top - the moderators, who have worked very hard in seeing that things are moving smoothly. Well done.

Congratulations to all of us here. We are all wonderful people, men and women of goodwill. This site has been able to stand, hugely because of us all. It's a thing of joy to have a largely visited and appreciated site like this, that we could call our own. We've all helped in sparkling a fire that's blazing very fast and high into the sky. Let that fire never go off.

Thank you to Missterious, my best friend, the one & only love of my life, my dearest, who introduced me to this fun-filled family a few years ago. And since then, it's been nothing but fun. Thanks, Yum.

Congratulations to all the great friends I've made here:
Missmossy
Kizmarty
Juliesexy
Myouri
Herzumpther
Claireshan1
DEllaluv
Mzhorlah
Darlynlara
Agybabe
BreezyRita
Safarigirl
Lilamartedi
Richiy
Lanicky
And many more.

It would have obviously been so so boring without you. You've no idea how much I appreciate you. Some of you & I don't keep in touch again, but I remember and appreciate you still. Much love.

Shout out to Missmossy. The very first real friend and somewhat confidante I made here. I'm crazy, I'm stupid, I'm childish, but I appreciate you more than you ever think. Thanks, dearie, for everything. You're a darling. I never forget.

Worthy mention goes to MissMakas, my childhood friend and sweetheart. Welcome to Nairaland, dearie.

I miss FlawlessS and Mayapop. They should be here, but they are not.

May the fun, the joy and the fulfillment we derive from here, extend to our real life endeavors, and may they transcend into something great, to the greater glory of God.

Ciao...

JoeCutie:
Igbo language (Asusu Igbo)

1. Hair - Ntutu isi
2. Eyes - Anya
3. Ears - Nti
4. Nose - Imi
5. Chest - Obi
6. Stomach - Afo
7. Fingers - Mpuru aka (mkpisi aka)
8. Knee - Ikpere
9. Toes - Mkpuru ukwu/okpa (mkpisi okpa)
10. Head - Isi
11. Mouth - Onu
12. Shoulder - Nkuuvu (Nkukuuvu)
13. Arm - Ogboro aka
14. Hand - Aka
15. Leg - Ukwu (okpa)
16. Foot - Ukwu (okpa)
.........................
17. Cheek - Nti
18. Adam's apple - Akwa akpiri
19. bosom - Ara
20. Umbilicus - Umbilikuusu
21. Abdomen - Abudomenu
22. Groin - Groyinui
23. joystick - Utu/Amu
24. Vagina - Otu (don't say this at home)
25. Thigh - Otoko
26. Calf - Ichiri ukwu (ichiri OK PA
27. Ankle - nku ukwu/okpa
28. Forehead - Egedege ihu
29. Chin - I've forgotten
30. Shoulder - Check 12
31. Arm - Check 13
32. Elbow - Ichiri aka
33. Forearm - Is there anything like that?
34. Wrist - Nku aka

Cc: MizMycoli

JoeCutie:
See Arsenal fans!

10 years and nothing. You later won one FA cup, and you want to eclipse Chelsea fans whom you've always accused of making noise in shouting? That's the effect of winning. Don't forget that. You don't shut up when you're winning. You only shut up when you're not winning, and it's obvious you've nothing to talk about.

Arsenal have been without trophies for approximately 10 years, and within those 10 years, Chelsea have been sweeping in the trophies from all cylinders - home and abroad. So it's only natural that Arsenal fans would go cold, while Chelsea fans take the center stage. Now, Arsenal FC is gradually coming up again, and their fans are sprouting again. It's not humility or pride on the part of Arsenal fans and Chelsea fans respectively. It's just how the beautiful game makes you feel. Even when you want to control it, you still can't. It's the effect of winning. Enjoy this feeling when your team is giving it to you.

Congratulations to all Arsenal fans. You deserve it.
#OneGame
#EqualityInTheGame
#RightToPlay
#FootballWithoutViolence
#FootballDevoidOfRacism

From a #CFC faithful.
#TheChelseaFamily.

JoeCutie:
Yes! The same ones who lifted the capital one cup last weekend too. And the same ones who are most likely to be crowned EPL champions come May.

Oh, lest I forget... The same ones who who will play PSG in the 2nd leg of their round of 16 UEFA CHAMPIONS LEAGUE on Wednesday.

How far?
How market?
When is your Champions League match coming up? Abeg I wan watch am oh. I no wan miss such a high profile match.

Even Everton are playing in Europe.

KingTom:
Se ole so ede Yoruba?

KingTom:
No ah ah, see as you take lift your babe Juliesexy climb,tree you big jor

KingTom:
I don't think you wore any, and if you did Joecutie na sharp guy na, he must've made it disappear

KingTom:
So it was not your skirt and Joecutie's trouser I found on the floor abi?

JoeCutie:
I love this. You're a realist. Always attuned to the reality.

KingTom:
On that Achii tree in Mazi Ikenna's compound

JoeCutie:
Fallacy of 'Blasphemus Againstus Religionus'

Many years ago when I was a learner, I offered to teach a choir because one girl I was chyking was a chorister in that choir. From there, I started going to Church almost every day, for either choir practice, fellowship or one reason or the other, but I made sure that the babe in question was involved in every of those engagements I made. I equally agreed to take her on a private Keyboard lesson. In fact, I was always seen in or around the church premises. Fast forward the story, when I finally got her, I took her home and the rest was...in fact, you know the drill. I got what I wanted, I moved ahead.

The inclusion of "automatic" in the statement has flawed the whole argument, making the logic invalid. If you say "potential", that's fine. "Every Church-goer is a potential child of God", that's okay. You can never be an automatic child of God just because you go to Church everyday, but you're at least, a potential child of God. Why? Because you could one day, encounter God in a special way and you'd be arrested by His presence just the same way Saul was. The closer you get to His house, the more you give yourself an opportunity, a chance to meeting with Him.

And for those people who argue that they mustn't go to Church to be called children of God, stop deceiving yourselves already. They claim to pray in their homes; fine. But if you need a favour from the President, and you have the chance of meeting him personally in his house, I'm sure you'd take that option, other than sitting at the comfort of your home, then trying to get across to him through a mediator or through Phone calls. God knows what we want even before we ask. He appreciates us when we kneel down in our rooms and pray to him, but I think He appreciates us even more when we could spare some of our time, come to Him in His house & pray to Him. God has feelings too. He also needs attention.
So stop being too lazy, and making unnecessary arguments, go to Church!

Chai! Today, I went to Church for the first time in months. Please, forgive me, Lord.

JoeCutie:
Even if I sleep with my girl more than Solomon ever slept with women, I still keep track of that thing that actually made me fall in love with her in the first place. I'm still a V sha and she's still a V too. V-mobile.

I remind myself of this everyday: even if I lose everything in my relationship, I should never lose the friendship we share. That's the basic, the stronghold and the epicenter of every successful relationship.

And for people who argue that sex breaks relationships, I'm sorry to burst your bubble; but sex actually solidifies relationship - healthy relationship. If your relationship is based on the desire of the flesh, say you fell in 'love' with your partner simply because he/she is sexy, hot, etc and as such, would be great in bed, I'm sorry because the moment the relationship is consummated, it goes faster than it came. But if you fell in love being friends, no matter how many times you have sex, you can only want more. Why? Cos that wasn't the reason for the relationship, it just happened (as a sort of embellishment). That's why it's always advisable to marry your best friend. Have sex, fight, argue, do whatever, you still are into each other.

Look before you leap.

KingTom:
Juliesexy and Joecutie sitting on a tree KISSING!!!!