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Romance / Overcoming Jealousy by kech(f): 6:50am On Nov 06, 2009 |
t's the feeling that wells up inside when a date speaks highly of an attractive coworker or when your soul mate seems a little too happy to see an ex at a party -- it's dating jealousy and it can take hold of you so fast and so hard that it leaves you and your relationship destroyed. Don't let jealousy take over your life: Follow these dating steps toward overcoming the green-eyed monster in you. 1. Leave the Players and the Flirts Behind One of the best ways to overcome jealousy is to not get involved with flirts and players. There are singles out there who will thrive on making you jealous because they like the dating drama and attention. If you're jealous, they know that you are constantly obsessing over them and dwelling on them. By provoking your jealousy, they've just made themselves the center of your universe. Instead, be smart -- kick them out of your universe and find a better date. 2. Determine if You're Jealous in This Relationship or Every Relationship In order to overcome jealousy, you've got to figure out whether you're being real or being paranoid. Normal jealousy can actually serve a purpose. It's there to alert you to a partner's possible infidelity -- a threat to the relationship. Is your relationship actually being threatened or is the jealousy in your head only? A good way to figure out if there's a basis to your jealousy is to reflect on your past relationships. Are you always jealous even if you haven't had a reason to be? Do you have trust issues in every relationship or just this one? Also, talk to some friends or family who can be objective about the situation and help you sort out your jealous feelings -- a counselor can also be helpful with this. 3. Get Confident in Dating The source of a lot of the jealousy has nothing to do with what your date does; it lies within you. If you're upset because your date drools a little when he or she sees a fashion model or celebrity in a magazine, don't start comparing yourself to that image. Work on your dating confidence and focus on all you have to offer. Then, your envy of others will dramatically decrease. 4. Talk It Through Learn to communicate your jealous feelings in a healthy way. For instance, let your mate know that you're jealous about the amount of time the attractive coworker gets to spend with him or her. Make sure as you're talking, you're not accusing. Accusing makes any person defensive, and you won't get anywhere. 5. Draw the Line Particularly, if you are in a monogamous relationship with someone, you need to establish what behaviors are acceptable to you and what behaviors will bring out the green-eyed monster in you. Are you okay with your partner constantly texting a single man -- or single woman? Will that send you over the edge? How do you feel about your partner dancing with someone else at a club when you aren't around? Establishing reasonable boundaries and respecting them gets both of you on the same playing field. The keyword here is reasonable. Setting a boundary like "Don't talk to any single men -- or single women -- you work with" is an impossible and smothering line to draw. 6. Strengthen Your Relationship in Other Ways If you're overly jealous when there isn't a whole lot of reason to be, it means that your relationship isn't as strong as it should be. You need to evaluate what's lacking. Are you not spending enough quality time together? Has the passion died down over the years? Once you identify what's really concerning you, then you can address it with your partner and work on strengthening the relationship rather than wasting time and energy on empty jealous feelings. |
Culture / Re: Igbo/yoruba Guys/girls/women And Men. by kech(f): 6:29am On Nov 05, 2009 |
tpia.:Is it by force to marry from your tribe? Why should he "settle" for anyone else from his tribe just to "keep to his tribe". I don't think it's fair to him and to the "girl from his tribe" he settles for. What is going to happen is that the poor "girl from his tribe" will end up always being second best. Why would anyone wish that life torture on someone else? I believe if one wants something, and it's worth it, and you have the opportunity, go for it. If you try, and it still doesn't work out, then maybe it was not meant to be. Nothing good comes easy, and this is about life in general. If you don't fight for what you want, you won't get it. Shikena. Some people think this marriage thing is beans and it's shocking. Tribe my butt! I can't tell you how sick I am of hearing friends and colleagues whine about how they made mistakes and how they should have fought harder to get what they wanted bla bla bla Cowardice is no virtue. |
Culture / Re: Igbo/yoruba Guys/girls/women And Men. by kech(f): 2:38am On Nov 05, 2009 |
ChinenyeN: HAHA!!! ChinenyeN I feel you oooo! There nothing Igbo fathers fear like having an unmarried daughter with a child. LOL!! I know a girl who threatened the father that if she didn't marry her efik fiancé, she was going to stay unmarried forever and that she was also going to get pregnant for her efik fiancé. The father called her bluff. He said that was her business. By the time the father could blink, the girl had gotten pregnant. LOL!!! When the father heard about it, he practically summoned the boy to his home and told him to bring his people FAST!! The wedding was put on fast-forward If you had seen the dad on that day, dancing and grinning from ear to ear like that was what he wanted all along. |
Culture / Re: Igbo/yoruba Guys/girls/women And Men. by kech(f): 12:01am On Nov 05, 2009 |
Let him pray seriously. Some fathers can be pig-headed but I can confidently tell you that as long as the girl sticks with him, things will come to a head. The girl is the one that needs to be strong in this case because there is nothing else the boy can do. Your friend should tell her to keep crying for her father. For real!! She need to put pressure on him. All he needs now is the fathers' consent and everything else will fall into place. There's no need for him to go home again if he has no more holiday time. It won't make any difference anyway. The girl should do her own part down in Naija. She needs to fight for what she wants. This is a partnership. They are both in this together. Tell your friend not to stress himself. As long as he's sure the girl is by his side, there's no problem. He just needs to be patient. These situations are usually like this. |
Celebrities / Re: Ramsey Nouah's Wife Files For Divorce by kech(f): 6:00am On Nov 02, 2009 |
Is that not the picture from the movie he did with Jackie Appiah? Naija na wah ooo. |
Culture / Re: Igbo/yoruba Guys/girls/women And Men. by kech(f): 1:07am On Nov 02, 2009 |
Hey yaa. Look, if they are really sure they want to be with each other, it's possible, there'll just be some hitches here and there. Tell the girl to just keep on crying for her parents I'm serious ooo. In this case, the girl holds the power. Trust me. The only way this marriage will not hold is if the girl finally gives up on the guy. Honestly, forget the yoruba factor, I think the fact that he's from a broken home compounded the whole issue. The parents probably think the guy's marriage will end up like his parents'. Truth be told, having your parents as role models is a big deal. It's not the guys fault though. He should try to get close to some people in the girl's family so that they can help him out. At this point he needs to prove to the girl's parents that he is responsible and can think on his own. He shouldn't just sit down and expect everything to be fine and dandy ooo. If the girl is worth it, let him proceed. If he thinks it's an uphill task and it's not worth it, then My sister married an Edo man. If someone had told me that my parents would allow any girl in my house marry from any other tribe I would never have believed it. It wasn't a funny sometin ooo. The guy penetrated into our home through our cousins. When my parents realized what was going on, the house was on fire. My dad literally stopped short of throwing him out of the house one day. My mum warmed up to him first (after some begging/secret calls and meetings ) Before my dad could say abracadabra, everyone in the house was in love with the guy. He was out-numbered. Now my dad and the guy are like siamese twins . Everyone in my family is like huh |
Culture / Re: Igbo/yoruba Guys/girls/women And Men. by kech(f): 10:36pm On Nov 01, 2009 |
There are tons of threads with this same issue. Tell your friend to pray. Really!! Anyway, you said the guy is from a broken home. That goes to show that it's really not about what tribe you marry from. It takes the Grace of God to keep a marriage. Good luck to your friend. Meanwhile I have noticed that a high percentage of igbo girls that marry yorubas are from Anambra. Nothing wrong ooo, just observing. |
Celebrities / Re: Dakore Egbuson And Her Fiance (Olumide Akande) by kech(f): 10:23pm On Nov 01, 2009 |
Felibaby: Dakore should hand off? WHY!!! So what if he has 3 sisters? What have they got to do with his life. Abi dem no go marry? |
Career / Architecture Salaries by kech(f): 3:12am On Oct 31, 2009 |
Guys does anyone know the range of pay for Architects in Naija. Not from all these draghtsman ones ooo. From the well established firms. |
Career / Aliko Dangote Neck Deep In Debt: Feared Broke; Plan Massive Lay-offs! by kech(f): 10:24pm On Oct 30, 2009 |
There are worrying indications that Nigeria’s richest man, Alhaji Aliko Dangote is facing a financial tempest that has pushed the Forbes-listed billionaire on the brink of bankruptcy as his financial empire suffocates under the weight of crumbling debt and mismanagement. |
TV/Movies / Re: Genevieve And Omotola To Co-Star In A New Movie (IJE) by kech(f): 1:13am On Oct 30, 2009 |
Aloy~Emeka: My dear. E tire me too. |
Celebrities / Re: Rita Dominic: Is She Really All That? by kech(f): 1:10am On Oct 30, 2009 |
redsky1: My point exactly, you have your own opinion and so do others who think she's "the bomb". The more reason why you don't need a topic to assure yourself of your opinion. And honey, as for you being "fair", good for you. I guess that makes your beef justified. Meanwhile if you want to go that route, there's nothing like "fair". You are either light-skinned or not. I don't do "fair". I'm a gorgeous dark-skinned lady. "Fair" is for unsecure dark-skinned people who feel the need to differentiate themselves from those who are more darker skinned. Look, its not a big deal. Honestly, I also don't think Rita is all that so I don't blame you for your opinion. My issue it with the arguement you are trying to make about her skin tone. It's so petty. |
Sports / Re: U-17 World Cup: Ogba And Marina Fan Park Pictures by kech(f): 5:07pm On Oct 29, 2009 |
Ok, I don't mean to sound like a spoilsport but what is fantastic about these pictures? The fact that there's a canopy with a million chairs and a 24" screen for people to sit and watch? Or is it because of the street lights that don't serve its purpose? My candle shines more light than those things. Anyway like I said, let me not spoil your fun, but I'm not inpressed. *walks away* |
Celebrities / Re: Rita Dominic: Is She Really All That? by kech(f): 4:58pm On Oct 29, 2009 |
Redsky1 wrote: *rolling my eyes* Ok, truth be told. Me thinks the poster is HIGHLY INSECURE. Deep down, this is not about Rita Dominic. It's about her complexion. The poster has some sort of grouse - like others do- about light skin and beauty because that is the crux of the matter in her post. When will some ladies get over this light skinned thing. Like someone said earlier, different features you have can make you more appealing to the eye. Light skin is just one of those features. For example, a girl may seem more beautiful if she has a more pointed nose, or silkier hair, or straighter teeth, or a longer face/neck, or beautiful eyes, or fuller lips, or a killing body, OR FAIRER OR DARKER SKIN!! These are all features that can completely make a person stand out from any crowd. Why is the issue of the "fairer skin" the only one people have a problem with. Why don't people say "If it weren't for her straight nose she'll be ugly. Let's see her with a flatter nose" [/i]or [i]"If it weren't for her long face she'll be ugly. Let's see her with a rounder face" [/b]or [b]"IF IT WEREN'T FOR HER DARK SKIN SHE'LL BE UGLY. LET'S SEE HER WITH A LIGHTER FACE!" People need to get over themselves already. GOSH! *rolling my eyes*. When they call us insecure now, we'll start barking like dogs. Typical black man syndrome. |
TV/Movies / Re: Genevieve And Omotola To Co-Star In A New Movie (IJE) by kech(f): 4:35pm On Oct 29, 2009 |
azeeza: I don't think they were close friends before. I don't think they are enemies either. The "beef" people claim they have is just professional. Every professional industry has it's rivals. Doesn't mean they are enemies or don't talk to each other. I think they are kinda like acquaintances. You get the job done and move on. They don't have to hang around each other, go to the market together , wear the same clothes and all that lot to prove they are not quarreling. They both have other things to do. |
TV/Movies / Genevieve And Omotola To Co-Star In A New Movie (IJE) by kech(f): 2:44am On Oct 29, 2009 |
Genevieve And Omotola Doing It Again! (New Movie!) Ok, for all of you Genny and Omotola fans who like to cause unnecessary rifts (including me ) . Here's another blockbuster movie to be released featuring the both of them. They've acted together a couple of times and they were both remarkable. Sister's love, Games Women Play, Blood Sister, and now this. To be honest, if there is really some kind of rivalry between them like people claim cos I don't know, I think it's a healthy one. They bring out the best in each other. I'm so gonna watch this movie. I can't wait. SYNOPSIS: IJE tells a tale of Chioma, a child growing up in the Nigerian countryside, who warned her restless sister, Anya, about the trappings of the American Dream. Now ten years later, Anya is accused of killing three men in a Hollywood Hills mansion—one of them her record producer-husband. Chioma travels from Nigeria to Los Angeles, and with the help of a young, unproven attorney, discovers that the dark secret her sister wants to keep hidden might be the only thing that can win her freedom.
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Business / Re: Bakery & Kitchen/Food Service Equipments by kech(f): 2:23am On Oct 29, 2009 |
LUKE AND JUDE is a leading manufacturing company providing bakery and kitchen equipments and systems to the baking and food service industry in Nigeria. We locally manufacture and import from various European and Asian bakery and food service manufacturers while providing advice and support for our customers. Products include Ovens, Mixers, Millers, Cookers, Freezers, Warmers etc. Website: http://www.lukeandjudemfg.com Email: info@lukeandjudemfg.com Contact Phone No.: 08035807532 |
Romance / Re: Can You Marry Lady That Is Far Shorter Than You by kech(f): 8:35am On Oct 20, 2009 |
dayokanu:I'm 6ft tall. Used to hate my height in secondary school, it wasn't fun towering above almost all your mates and having people call you "dongo" and "iroko" , (It was an "all girls" school). The irony of the whole thing is that now I just can't stop flaunting it |
Politics / Re: Alert From The Nigerian Police Force by kech(f): 8:14am On Oct 18, 2009 |
Hmm, ok my problem here is, why can't the Nigerian police force coin a contact number that is remember-"able". What's all this 0805#$6>?{+=54? Person go fit remember am? The US has 911, other countries have 199, 999 etc. There is a reason why such numbers are short and have repetitive digits: 1) Numbers that have repetitive digits can be easily remembered by everyone, even a kid. 2) Because it is usually used in a life/death situation. There is no time to dial long numbers. The shorter the better. (3) is usually ideal Does it mean I have to store all those numbers in my phone so that when I get kidnapped I 'll start "scrolling" down in my phone to get the numbers. Won't they kill me before I even fish out those numbers? Or are they expecting me to cram those numbers? Ok, if they are, common sense should have told them to use numbers that are cram-"able". Like 08099999999, or 07011111111 (you guys get my point). You cannot just buy any sim card from the streets and decide to use it as an emergency number. They should get the phone carriers to give them numbers that are ideal. 334,333,444,466,777,998,112,222, whatever!! Numbers no dey finish!!! This is the police force for pete's sake!! |
Celebrities / Re: Who Cares If Omotola Jalade Has Ten Children She Needs to Loose The Weight by kech(f): 7:26am On Oct 18, 2009 |
I'm so sick of hearing that too. I usually get amused when people defend her and say she has a "nice sexy body" because - in their own words - she has had 3 or 4 children and still looks like that. Ok ooo, I'm not going to talk about the people I know who have had 5-6 children and made it their point to stay very fit . To be fair, I don't really blame them. The average Naija woman lets herself go and becomes fat after childbirth, so Omotola's situation is a case of the one-eyed man being king in the land of the blind. |
Celebrities / Re: Liz Benson Returns To Nollywood by kech(f): 10:08pm On Oct 16, 2009 |
Yay!! Our pioneer actors no gree ooo. Most of them are coming back in full force. Wonderful! I know it will bring sanity and amp up the standard in Nollywood. Most importantly it will bring competition to some of those talentless "actors". |
Celebrities / Liz Benson Returns To Nollywood by kech(f): 10:02pm On Oct 16, 2009 |
Source: |
Politics / Nigerian Airport Customs And The Issue Of "foodstuffs" by kech(f): 4:49pm On Oct 15, 2009 |
Ok guys, I need info on this. What are the laws regarding carrying "foodstuffs" when travelling out of the country. Why do they always make one feel like they are carrying contraband? Every time I travel out of Nigeria, I have to "drop" something because of my foodstuff. They say if I don't, they'll have to have it quarantined (which I'll pay for and may take forever) and I may possibly lose my foodstuff. I know they are lying but I just pay the money cos after waiting in a long queue for it to get to my turn, I don't want any hassle or unnecessary delay at the airport. Now I've made it a point not to be a mugu no more so guys, for those of you who travel out with foodstuffs all the time, how do you do it? What are the "laws" regarding this? Do they actually have any? I need to know cos this time I'm ready for them. See trouble ooo. If the country I'm going to says I can bring them in what's the problem here? * By "foodstuffs" I mean stuff like Dryfish, Okporoko and the likes of it. |
TV/Movies / Koko Mansion Governess Chika Anadu Talks About Rita by kech(f): 6:33am On Oct 14, 2009 |
Educating Rita and other Kokolettes By Michaela Moye October 12, 2009 04:26PMT Chika Anadu is probably better known as The Governess, official chaperone to contestants on the now concluded reality show, Koko Mansion. However, 28-year-old Anadu says that she "never wanted to be in front of the camera" and is more interested in writing, directing and producing. Armed with a degree in Law and Criminology and a Master's in Africa, Human and Sustainable Development, she returned to Nigeria from the UK and found herself, on TV. Anadu talked to NEXT about the Mansion, D'banj and of course, Rita. What do you think about the contestants on Koko Mansion? At first, I found them a trial. Apart from maybe one or two people who were easy to deal with - Bidemi and maybe Bolanle - they never gave me any trouble. The other girls, I think, were trying to test their muscles. I think afterwards when everybody knew how far we could go and sort of learned everybody's character, it was easier for us to then enjoy each other; especially people who were there longer. What was difficult was that I'd never done anything like this before. I was the contestant coordinator (at first). I helped to organise the audition, the photo shoots, and profile shoots. (Becoming Governess) was kind of last minute. The producers asked me, "Chika would you like to, ?" and I was like, "no way!" Trying to organise young women is very difficult. I accepted on a Friday and the job started on a Sunday so I was lost at sea for the first week or two. [I got] criticism from everybody, even people who were supposed to be urging me on and supporting me. I was just like "Oh my God!" It was very difficult. I'm not one to quit so I didn't think about it. Yet, after the first week or two I started enjoying my job and I think [the contestants] started to enjoy the experience more. Tell us more about yourself I speak fluent French because after my first year at university, I went to study French at Le Sorbonne in Paris. I love to travel. That's my number one thing - travelling. I love Europe. I love all the architecture and arty stuff. I'm a huge film buff. That's my second love - from childhood. My favourite word is cinematography. I'm glad I'm home because I'm getting experience. It's more difficult to get into this industry in the West, like in England where I used to be based. I guess Nigerians are a bit biased too, when you go to school abroad (laughs). I'm lucky. Do you ever consider that you might be a celebrity or you might be considered a celebrity? We live in a whole celebrity-obsessed culture. I never want to be seen as a celebrity. I would rather be seen as "this girl who is good at her work" - whether it's writing or directing or presenting. I want people to say, "Oh, she's a good presenter" instead of "she's a celebrity" because usually when you're called a celebrity it's because you're not known for anything else. You're just famous for being famous. There are some people we look at and we don't call them celebrities; we call them actresses or actors because that's the impact they make on you. Who were your favourite Kokolettes in the house? I don't know if I had favourites. There were some people that perhaps I laughed more with, or smiled at more but that was because when someone smiles at you, you smile back. I wasn't there to be their friend so I didn't really push. What was it like working with D'banj and the rest of the Mo Hits Crew? I had quite a bit of contact with D'Banj. He's so friendly. If he comes in two or three times a week he'll go round all the rooms backstage: the editing room, the sound room and the production room where I was, he'd shake everybody's hand and say "hello". The other guys, I saw once or twice. They were also very pleasant. No big egos, surprisingly. They've been quite pleasant to work with. I've been trying to see if I can do other things with them and they've been enthusiastic. Rita became everybody's celebrity. She's many people's favourite. At the same time many are offended by her. What did you get from Rita? What lessons do you think Nigeria has to learn from Rita? I think that the situation with Rita, her popularity and everything - is a snapshot of Nigeria. It's all about sentiment and everyone just conveniently forgeting the objectives of the show. We were looking for the Ideal Nigerian Woman. We stated that, even in the application form. People might say: OK, why did we put her in the house? Well, she applied. We had to put different kinds of people in the house. Rita is not ideal. People would be talking about how, "It doesn't matter that she's not educated. My grandmother or my mother was not educated. Are you telling me she's not ideal?" Your mother and grandmother were born in the 50s and the 20s. This is 2009. Education is absolutely essential; I do not care whatever it is you want to be. I was one of the people who was offended that people thought [Rita] should have won. She got as far as she did because of her popularity. It's great. Whether she won or not, like you said, she's already a star. If she wants, she can go as high as she pleases because she endeared herself to a lot of people. And there are endearing things about her. Being in the house, I didn't get it. I would come to the house and I would hear things, on Facebook; and I would think to myself: is it the same person I'm watching and seeing? She played a lot on sympathy: "I'm poor, I come from this, I don't know a lot, I want to learn." They were taught a lot of things while they were in the house, and I don't see that she took a lot of things on board. With the acceptance speech, the way she spelt mother was M-A-D-A and father was F-A-D-A. Two or three weeks before, they had been taught words that are often mispronounced. Everybody took notes. So she had notes and it wasn't like it was [on the] spur of the moment. They were given time, so she could have gone back to her notes and checked the correct spellings. She did end up asking if it was correct spelling or not. She had an inkling that it was wrong. If someone is willing to learn, they will correct themselves and they will learn. I just never saw that, so I feel that maybe she's not just academic. There's nothing wrong with that but I feel it was blown out of proportion. Nigeria is never about merit. It's always about sentiment: "She's from my town, " or "this poor person, " It's ridiculous. I am glad that Bolanle won. It has done our show proud. Bolanle is intelligent, very respectful and she's responsible. She can represent you and me any day. With Rita I'm not so sure. Source: http://234next.com/csp/cms/sites/Next/ArtsandCulture/5465228-147/story.csp |
Business / Bakery & Kitchen/Food Service Equipments by kech(f): 12:02am On Oct 14, 2009 |
LUKE AND JUDE is a leading manufacturing company providing bakery and kitchen equipments and systems to the baking and food service industry in Nigeria. We locally manufacture and import from various European and Asian bakery and food service manufacturers while providing advice and support for our customers. Products include Ovens, Mixers, Millers, Cookers, Freezers, Warmers etc. Website: http://www.lukeandjudemfg.com Email: info@lukeandjudemfg.com Contact Phone No.: 08035807532 |
Business To Business / Re: Introduce Your Business by kech(f): 11:51pm On Oct 13, 2009 |
LUKE AND JUDE is a leading manufacturing company providing bakery and kitchen equipments and systems to the baking and food service industry in Nigeria. We locally manufacture and import from various European and Asian bakery and food service manufacturers while providing advice and support for our customers. Products include Ovens, Mixers, Millers, Cookers, Freezers, Warmers etc. Website: http://www.lukeandjudemfg.com Email: info@lukeandjudemfg.com |
Celebrities / Re: Sammie Okposo Is Getting Married: Finally. by kech(f): 3:27am On Oct 10, 2009 |
Ah! which Stella? I dey slack ooo. |
Celebrities / Re: P-Square Finally Opens Up About Landlord by kech(f): 1:01am On Oct 10, 2009 |
I know P-Square can be goat-heads sometimes but this is why they say "There is always another side to a story". From this story, the Landlord is definitely a greedy man. |
Celebrities / P-Square Finally Opens Up About Landlord by kech(f): 12:58am On Oct 10, 2009 |
SOURCE: |
Politics / Re: Ghana's Plan To Chase Out Nigerians - Classifies Ecowas Citizens As Expertrates by kech(f): 5:35am On Oct 09, 2009 |
Kobojunkie:LMAOPIMP!!! Kobojunkie I tire oooo. All the hard work put in just to prove a point. Persin fit get headache. LOL!! |
Celebrities / Re: Chimamanda Adichie: The Danger Of A Single Story by kech(f): 2:47am On Oct 08, 2009 |
I love this girl. Moderator can this video be embedded? |
Celebrities / Chimamanda Adichie: The Danger Of A Single Story by kech(f): 2:45am On Oct 08, 2009 |
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