₦airaland Forum

mutter:
I don`t have a problem with the level of your reasoning
You are in the majority.
I was only trying to stimulate you intellectually.

Nice one

TV01:
Absolutely true.

But you see the desires of most "she'" is what precludes them from greatness, not discrimination. They don't desire the sacrifice, loneliness, risk, solitude or other extremes that are required for greatness. They prefer comfort, companionship, communing, nurturing and the like.

That is why men lead - in both an authoritative and pioneering sense. It is what it is.


TV

And I agree with you. But I'll say those "desires" emanate largely from orientation. If I grew up with a father constantly telling me that I cannot achieve what a man can achieve in this life simply because I am a woman, my aspiration is automatically tailored away from those vocations that are male-dominated. And that would not be because I couldn't do it but I had been made to believe that I couldn't do it, hence I didn't bother trying.

Timbuktou:
Obama has been a failure by the way. Maybe someone should have told him he couldn't be so we'd be spared, amongst other things, the attempt at strong-arming Africans nations into accepting homosex. The mumu Obama will still come and claim that women are getting paid less than men for the same job.

Babe, you are reading what you want. I have said I will tell her she can achieve whatever she wants. I'm just stating my own opinion as a guide. She's at liberty to accept or tow whichever path she thinks will favour her. Stereotypes are instructive whether you want to admit so or not. Just because something is a stereotype doesn't make it wrong. Take note.

This is not what you said before naa then why have been going back and forth since

I deliberately ignored other issues you've raised so we can stay focused on the subject. I don't like scattered arguments. But we are good now with the bolded. Cheers!

Timbuktou:
That she should do what she wants. Every decision comes at a price. I'm telling what I will tell her now, you no wan gree. Life is not a competition. Measuring her achievements by what men can achieve is limiting her potential as a woman. Like someone earlier said, men dominate certain fields, women dominate others. There are things that will be easier for her to achieve just because she's a woman. And she better not join the military, or police force or related professions. It is not womanly

Na today? I have heard even what you haven't said.

I think I can infer your answer to my question from the bolded but I really hope you are just joking cuz you will be doing her and yourself a lot of disservice if you do.

Don't limit anyone especially your daughters. If Obama's parents had told him a black man will never become a president in U.S. so he shouldn't ever bother trying, you realise the harm that counsel would have wrecked? Again, dont limit anyone because of stereotypes. #nuffsaid

All these funny questions you people are sharrrrring on Nairaland this night, na wa o

I just tire

kstadaura:
am not calling them bastards thats their name, they are innocent and cannot be blamed for anything, its the way they were born thats not approved of, and their parent who couldnt control their sexual desire. Apart from that they are normal people like you and i.

Do you realise it's derogatory??

Pls leave the babies out of it and face the parents. Would you advise them to be murdered or thrown in the gutters just because you consider them different? abeg o

Timbuktou:
I will tell her to do her best and value what's most important in life. It's not a competition out there. She cannot have it all, not even men can, she should strive for balance in her life. Her value isn't in relation to what men have achieved or can achieve. If she wants to have children, she'll be best served having them in a family with a male husband. She should use her feminine strength to develop her femininity. Men have their areas of strength, women have theirs. Trying to be a man will do her no good. And yes, her primary place is in the kitchen . I'm serious.


And I repeat my question, where are the female equivalent of these aforementioned men? Are you saying women haven't, at least, tried to reach these heights? Come on, Kimoni. I'm even beginning to doubt Marie Curie's purported contribution to science.

Oga!!! All this preaching?? It's not Sunday now. Not like I don't agree with some though. What will you tell her exactly about what she can achieve. That she can never achieve as much as a man can (your initial comment that I quoted)? Or she can achieve whatever she desires to?

I don't even care about primary place. When the time is right, she will choose her place of primary assignment. They no dey teach person that one naa, dat is strictly her personal choice.

As per your question - ask google naa. You want me to be researching google for you?? A whole Timbuktu? The land of past glory

5minsmadness:
Lol, very funny at looking forward to touch, at that age what does she know that she wants to look forward to touch. abeg this is social forum and people will always think the worst.

i rememebr this pic very well, the parents posted thier granddaddy and granddaughter in the bathtub together, I'm not even sure they were buck nakiid. If there was anything inapproporiate going on they wouldnt have posted it on social media. the world is full of too many gullible people abeg. So if i want to go swimming with my daughter I now have to be careful so she doesnt touch my thing and become magically attached to it? Or if I walk out of the bathroom butt nakiid I have to be careful so my three year old daughter who is still a toddler wont see my thing and start asking me questions? The same people saying this ius inappropriate will be the one to tell you not to hide anything sexual education from you child. If your child is not going to learn about sec from you who will she learn it from? Me I see nothing wrong with this pic as far as am sure its her grandfather or father in the pic, the generality of men are not monsters as some people will have us believe.

So kimoni will see this as inappropriate but with the same mind be bathing her three year old son and washing his thing, dont you think its inappropriate? Isnt it possible she might molest her son when no one is looking?

abeg there is nothing wrong with this pic. You folk should not raise your kids in fear. your kids should be able to trust family. If they cant then the problem is with that family and not society as a whole.

I wish but unfortunately it is not the case. It is fast becoming a soceital problem. There is hardly any day I log on to Nairaland or any other news channel that I don't read about kids being sexually molested by families, guardians or teachers. Hence, I am now more aware than ever and will not let my daughter be used as a guinea pig. I will rather take necessary precautions and pass the same awareness to her. It is what it is.

kstadaura:
I have seen many young ladies that have given birth to bastards, in their parent's house,although they still look pretty and have suitors but that sounds awkward to me. i am not saying that they should be isolated or hated for having bastards but i just cant do it.

just recently a friend of mine(lady) whom i have crush on,is pregnant out of wedlock, the moment i heared that i just dont feel the way i use to feel about her.......its really disturbing.

guys can you marry a lady who had a bstard?

Are you alright? Why are you calling those little angels bastards? Could they have controlled in any way the circumstances of their birth?

5minsmadness:
At which age?

This story was trending some months back. She was about 4/5 if my memory has not failed me.

Mikollon1:
Oh, and by the way, what's funny about the thread?

never mind

Mikollon1:
Blank

Timbuktou:
Yes, ma. You are right. No woman has ever wanted to be better or as good as Beethoven or Michael Jackson. No female group has ever given their all to be better than The Beatles or The Rolling Stones. Where are the female Bill Gates, Steve Jobs? Alberta Einsteins nko? Socrata nko? They have all been discriminated against, I guess.

Tell me what you are going to teach your daughter about achievement? That she can never achieve what a man can achieve? Really?

Again I repeat, any female can do whatever she sets her mind to do. It's a different thing if she doesn't want to or doesn't see the need to or in some extreme cases, she wasn't given the opportunity to. But it's got nothing to do with the myth that she cannot.

Mikollon1:
Okay

So who are you?

Mikollon1:
Okay, what are you suspecting?

Blank

That's the granddaughter if I remember correctly and it is so inappropriate. Allowing your daughter to get naked with any man at this age is very inappropriate.

Timbuktou:
Na the kain tin wey I dey hate be dis. She said gumption, Kimoni?

Lol...Mohammed go meet mountain, mountain go meet Mohammed - as long as Mohammed and mountain don see each other

Mikollon1:
Guess

Guessing is not one of my strength

Timbuktou:
One of the quickest ways to know a fraudulent feminist, and I think their all frauds, is listen to them closely. Once you hear "be a man", "be a gentleman", "be romantic", you know you're talking to a pretender. Sexism is abhored in feminism, which is why I'm baffled with feminists calling for the establishment of quotas in the corporate world to boost female participation. Hahahaha. Such equality. Their biggest fraud, which still grinds my gears, is the perpetuation of the gender pay gap which has been refuted by economists and even feminists and feminist apologies for decades, yet these equal women keep propounding this lie. I would take anything a feminist said with a grain of salt.

The average woman cannot do what the average man can do. Look at men and women born on the same day and given the exact same opportunities. Study their lives over a 50-year period, the results will be glaring.

You lie

Anybody can be whatever he or she wants to be. If she believes it strongly enough and wants it bad enough, she will do whatever a man can do.

Funny but insightful thread.

@ Mikollon1 - what is your old moniker?

Timbuktou:
According to which English Language authority o? Or is it a yoruba word?

Haba Oga, gumption na English word naa

Woged2005:
But that's how everybody including pastors say 'Osu' cast system has been abolished in Ibo land and no one should pay attention to it, yet behind closed doors, the same people who say that won't allow their son's to marry one. As a woman you don't know these type of things affect one's psychology and well-being knowing you don't have a level playing ground with everybody else. We can't just over-look it.

I don't understand. Why don't you have a level playing ground? Because your friend's in-law regards female marketers as prostitutes

Generalizations like this comes from sheer ignorance. Like someone said, a hoe is a hoe regardless of career. Every step you take in life has its own challenges, it's left for individuals to deal with such challenges when they crop up.

Will this same parent stop their son from marrying a Nigerian female graduate simply because rumor has it that female students in Nigerian universities tend to sleep with lecturers before passing their examinations? That's a common rumor in Naija too, innit?

@ uniklinkum - very nice. Well done

SAMBARRY:
Some families are very ignorant and myopic like yours. I'm not sorry to say that

how can they conclude about bank marketers like that. Didn't their gumshion tell them that all career paths have their own temptations not only marketing

Be You a lecturer
medical doctor
teacher
nurse etc

anyway it's for the man to decide

As in eh, this kind generalization just dey tire person no be small.

How can one isolated incident just turn to "most". I hear and see female bank marketers getting married every Saturday, are they marrying goats? Na only female bankers dey market or face customers?

Bushmarogos everywhere

Mtcheeeeewww

FannySwindler:
Amis. You are...bxxxxxful. I knew it from the start.
Sorry you food is Inviting.

Yes she is....

No human can depict the depth of the lagoon?? like seriously When your fellow humans are having lunch at the depth of the ocean?

Ignorance is damn expensive...

What nonsense? Why should they be sacked? What exactly have they said that is untrue? Uncle Tai must be turning in his grave right now No wonder baba said not to bury him. This is exactly what you fought for for years and today, the stench is coming right from our own very kitchen.

Even in the military days, Ogun State never allowed dictators. We could never be bullied.

Amodu will never get away with this


Cc Sagamite, Bellong

natasha:
Learn to pick your battles wisely.
Keep your opinion or views about your BIL to ur self and your hubby. Your inlaws can take criticism from their blood NOT from u, irrespective of how "close" you may think u r are 2 them.

Ad for the extended visits, make no apologies for that my dear. It's gone with the wind and if she's still angry, disregard those feelings. M sure she won't have felt that way if it was her daughter's home neither would she hv stayed that long in those circumstances. Make she take dt ish wt her son if she's still catching feelings.

With regards to the wedding gifts, I strongly believe that after FOUR years of marriage, any gift you haven't used you definitely DON'T need and cam do WITHOUT.
What do you think your in laws home is, a storage facility? If those gifts were at your parents place, I can assure you they will probably be using some of them ( it's human nature). It doesn't make ur reaction unnecessary nor does it make your in laws bad people, it's just a natural thingy.
So my dear, if you are bothered then pls arrange 4 those gifts 2 be moved elsewhere or give them out to couples who may need them or open a shop and start selling them or keep quiet and turn a blind eye as they keep dwindling because you clearly have enough with no real need for them having been without these gifts for over 4yrs.
Stay blessed and be wise Mrs

Chillis:
My dear,
Make yourself useful
go get a job.
If no job, sell all those wedding gifts and start something for yourself abeg.

If for 4 yrs you don't use all the wedding gift, sell them and do something useful for yourself abeg.


If they want to quarell with you, let them. Life goes on. You can't please everybody.

@OP -

1. Pick your battles wisely...

2. You appear idle...pls get busy, get something doing to occupy your mind and time

Chillis:
Dem Don collect the pics finish o
Bukatyne, Kpele. I go snap another one
Edwife, ha far?

Shape of life...u soo trim Eddy
Almost like a teenager

Waiting patiently...