₦airaland Forum

purples25:
He wouldn't have agreed to pay the 15,630naira.

but he paid, you chicks think you're so smart eh..

Bluetooth777:
Fine boy abeg borrow me dat babe wey dey beside you make I take do weekend konji won kill ur bro for here.

walahi I no care about am. but when I see the babe Omo na fucck enter my mind.

Finemoore:
I followed a lady chat here, vr vr active in romance section. Always lose guard while chatting with people... I decide to know who is she after sending her pm. Omó, we carry am enter Gmail, to Facebook to WhatsApp... Lo and behold, this girl is just 17yrs old. Finished writing her waec 2019. I for no believe, not until I checked her Facebook pictures.

at least you jam girl na.. you never jam your fellow man wey go beat you collect your phone and money... lol

him try na..

NLHoodlum:
You See my hair? Try it not. I don't care about the expense I make sure to care for the hair on my head.
I have spent close to 50k+ just on my hair last week alone
How about you?

hair, face, dick and legs.

purples25:
Why not speak up and say you cannot pay?

he paid before na.. 15630 naira, you blind.

Gurumaharaji:
My old secondary school mates do meet annually and party..I seldom partake in it bcoz it is always a show up celebration where all the successful ones brag and intimidates those that are still struggling...I was cajoled by one of my mates to come that he will come wit one of his pretty cousin for me, we attended a single sex school so it will be an all guys celebration except those that are married or acquainted that will come wit their love ones...True to his word, Godwin came wit his pretty cousin, a damsel, an illogically beautiful lady, having all the necessary flesh and curves in its right proportion..I didn't waste time to remind him of his promised to me coz I couldn't trust the preying eyes of my mates at the party.. Godwin had already spoke wit her at home, he just pointed at me as the person he told her about, the girl didn't seems interested coz " I no sey I no fine" but nigga has to compose..She instead fine one of our mates interesting and they where getting along gisting, drinking and laughing seriously and ofcourse smooching ontop of my car boot..I couldn't take it any longer, I jump into my car and start it abruptly before they came to their senses..that was wen the lady realized that the car did not belong to that nigga but me..I left the celebration frustrated coz I was so much captivated by that lady's beauty. I woke up in the morning to see several of Godwin's Miss calls..I called him back and he said that his cousin was sorry about wat happened and that she wants my number..he send hers instead to me and I immediately call her for an appointment..we met infront of her school, I wanted us to just stay and chatted inside the car but this lady bluntly refused that we should enter an eatery that is opposite her school gate..I obliged not knowing that I'd meet the shocked of my life..This lady started ordering foods, drinks, meats, ice cream and shawarma as if I picked her up from IDP camp..Omo shame catch me, and I wasn't having enough money to pay for all her demands..I had to call my younger bro to bring my ATM to foot all the bills accrued.. Immediately I paid the sum of N15630.00 this lady told me that she will want to go and drop the food in her room and get back...I called after an hour but to no avail, I tried and her line was switched off...Omo hot tears wanted coming down but I had to be man enough..I traveled back to my place of redeployment coz I'm a serving Corp member. I called Godwin to explained wat his cousin did to me but dey moderfucker found everything funny and was just laughing at me..After months of no communication, the lady again appear from nowhere and message me on Whatsapp that she is broke..Omo vex catch me I wanted insulting her whole ancestors but I controlled myself and told her that I'd come back home during the weekend to give her money...I had no plan of traveling but I had to come and make a statement..I invited her to a friend's house..I promised to give her 25k after I sleep wit her..The lady joyfully open her kitty cat for me to untangle..I carry all the vex in me and nack this lady in different styles and rounds until my dick couldn't release sperm again... Infact, my friend's elder brother had to dash me a chilled coke afterwards that he enjoyed some commentaries coz dey lady was in a state of euphoria throughout shouting and moaning loudly..Now everything been set and done, I collected her account details to transfer the money I promised her..I told her that my bank had issues that I'd just withdraw the money and bring to her..I left her to shower and I zoomed off..after several hours of waiting, the lady bug my phone wit calls but I refused to pick, my friend already knows the game plan told her that he want to make use of his room..she now beg him of 500 naira to tp herself back to her house but he said he can only give her the money if she sleeps wit him, she insulted him and left but latter came back coz she has no money wit her...He too enjoyed his time wit her and gave her the 500 hundred...Now she went and told Godwin her cousin that I called her to my friend's abode and that both me and my friend raped her and this old college colleague of mine is threatening thunder and brimstone..I'm more thuggery than him in terms of street wise, so I no fear him threat but I want to be clear if I commit any offense punishable by the law of the country. Thank you

You get sense.. some simps go insult you, but no mind them..

nice.. good news..

FutureIsFemale:
That serves him right. Stealing is a crime.

he stole to feed.. when is that a crime. dumb chick.

wedding still hold.. wether him dey or not.

Martinelli35:
I am going to make this as brief as possible. I have noticed a trend with the reputation Nigerians seem to have with other Africans. I am currently dating a girl from Zimbabwe and we both are resident in England. The day I asked her out, she was initially a bit skeptical and told me her father had told her to avoid ending up with a Nigerian, I asked her why and she told me she had no idea.

We started dating and I began to get an idea of the reputation we had, obviously she was scared I had a wife and some kids back in Nigeria, I had to convince her that this was not the case and that I genuinely liked her.

Another time she told her friend from Zambia that she was dating a Nigerian and was told to be careful while dealing with me as a Nigerian.
It’s not all bad though, obviously we also have a reputation of being smooth talkers, she told me that we Nigerians have a way with words and that can make us irresistible at times. Who else has experienced this?

if I slap you, I swear dem go deport you.. mumu.

iRepNaija1:
Pedophile spotted.

na pedophile know pedophile..

SenecaTheYonger:
Damn Facebook is back

na lie guy.

Khaleepha5681:
Just because Facebook outage? you now feel at 1930s?

21st century is not just about facebook

Anyway...Nairaland is our number one resident

yeah.. chief.. nairaland is the mother of all social media right now, the owner is fucking smart, kudos to him tho.

Gamer999:
Apart from nairaland, Share what you're currently doing on your phone as the outage of major social media sites persists.
Me: I now have enough time to go through my unread mails, I'm also on Google to know things I'm curious about eg difference between thunder and lightning , the current situation now allows me to reconnect with friends and family via phone calls and sms. Also, I'm on boomplay streaming songs and finally on YouTube to catch some classic ukwa movies.

How bout you?

I feel like I'm in 1930s.. thank God say I get ps5 and nairaland.. the best website on earth right now.

UncleHaba22:

Op you don Bleep up.. see fresh young toto, you no be man joor.. mumu man.

justscorchone:
Na so one smallie stop me for obalende dey ask for my number say she wan invite me come church, innocent me when wan encourage the girl evangelism gave her my number na so the under 16 dey call me to flex her and invite her to my place, the way I chastised her she won't try it again, it seems demons have infiltrated our world and are disguising as humans just to make people commit sin, truly we are living on end times and the devil is working overtime.

Omo those smallies they vex now oh.. Omo if you come fine join na war... na God go say make man no become phedopiles.

as whatapp go down e pain me... I suppose collect money today allah.

jaeyking:
First learn how to spell well

bros you wicked oh..

Opexzy:
I will keep this as short as possible.

Three days ago I got a debit alert of 2700 naira from no where on my access bank account. I quickly moved the rest of my money into the other access bank account. I looked at the transaction description but I couldn't make any sense of it, so I let it slide... Since the card will expire this month.

Fast forward to today. I wanted to withdraw some cash, I have so many bank accounts but only this account has an atm card, so i would always move the amount I want to spend to this account. To my greatest surprise, I found out that this account has been thrown into negative with a deficit of over 3500 naira... How is this even possible... I checked my transaction history and I realised that I have like three different debit transactions today alone, I didn't even get an alert. Is Access Bank whining me or what? I don't even know where this debit transactions are coming from.

Bellow are the screenshots from my Access more mobile app. Please can anyone explain what's going on here.

The first image was the first debit alert I received.
The second one is my negative balance and the debit transaction from unknown sources.

guy whatsapp, facebook, instagram is down.. how man won take chop now.. you own better you get money wey dem dey debit.

slawormiir:
Damnnn niggar
Very good.....

I love this......he pain mark Zuckerberg for chest
Me must celebrate Facebook down fall

Grab my wine bottle and pop it up....
To all my real niggarrrrs....if you are a niggar and Mark Zuckerberg don use face book and Instagram almost frustrate you... then you must be a real niggar....

Come join me lets celebrate

we dey here baba.. them no want make we hustle, but God pass them.

sunshineV:
iphone is not for everyone (no be money aspect o) u gas be okay with being limited

I want you to be the iphone of my heart.. lol

saphiere:
https://.com/woman-allegedly-beheads-her-husband-over-alleged-cheating/

na wa oh.. make God no let us marry this kind of women

dignity33:
see his reaction.


https://www.instagram.com/reel/CUmZWnZA9Zz/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2YrLP1F1NW8

sugar mummy.. I need her.

szczescie:
I know and it's not only celebs Even me one time I didn't go out at all I had no friends, I hated the world At another time I felt like ending it all But I thought to myself, harming myself won't help at all Instead I'm very sure even after ending it people will still Insult me ontop

all true fam.. just be you no matter what.

szczescie:
Osibobo chop your money leave racists na who done chop but no get work get dey getstrength and time to chant racist chants

But Ehn if I fit dey make 50,000usd per week, you can call me anything you want, knock yourself out.
After all no be today people done dey curse me for free

If I tell you all the names dem call me and people wet done curse me you no go believe

I was born with bow leg it was fixed eventually very painfully though
I also had transparent enamel so my teeth was not white and because my bones are not exactly white people called me names for that as well

Even my papa no been believe say I smart? Him been they call me opkoko, my French teacher called me mumuyeye, I still don't know what any of those mean, back in secondary school some girl that was hoeing herself to me because she thought I had lots of cash because I spent some money on a friend's sister whom she was friends with in front of her, when I refused to spend on her even after she threw herself at me, unknown to her it was cause I had no money.
she stopped the hoeing, I won't lie I missed it and the girl was fine, tall exactly my height then, slim and yellow my spec, at the time I wasn't red pilled, I was a soy boy simp who thought she was actually in love with him (I was tall, thin, decent looking my legs were straightened by this time, only the translucent enamel) she and her friends started calling me Ginger because of my teeth I've since fixed it

Anyway all these EXPERIENCES helped make me stronger today you can insult me from morning to night and I won't even feel it
If you like insult my mama or Papa o ANYTHING it doesn't affect me

Osimhen abeg send me 2,000usd per week I will train you on how not to get hurt by b.s.

naso you go dey think.. even some celebrities don commit suicide because of some insults

we no know wetin be first runner up... whitemoney for life.. same way messi go win ballin d'or this October.

thank God.. now thunder fire buhari and all the bbn supporters.

Raalsalghul:
Source: https://www.espn.com/soccer/report/_/gameId/609447

op your uncle... messi mind dey uefa no be ligue one.

Angelfrost:
It's not even just the defense... Alaba can't be solely to blame for their poor and languid ball distribution around the middle.

The idiots struggle so hard to link up play.

true brother.

helinues:
He is the current city striker now. Jesus is playing from the right wing

damn.. is jesus no longer a striker or what?

Angelfrost:
Mauricio Pochettino, Carlo Ancellotti, David Moyes, Ronald Koeman, Brendan Rodgers... Una wehdone o!!! Clap for yourselves.

Dear United fans, these people are making a fine case for Ole not to get sacked!!!

I have never seen such shocking displays from top teams in a single weekend! Tufia!!!

since Madrid carry alaba come, thier defense just op waaaaa