What ever happened to being sensitive to her needs? to being a considerate lover? to being an understanding lover? To being a caring lover? To being a romantic lover? It is obvious from your posting that this girl was tender, young girl, ill prepared for your brute game and physically and emotionally not ready for your bull-in-a-china shop tactics. You have gone and emotionally scarred this girl for life. You jumped on her and pounded her with all your strength as if she were a LovePeddler with 45 years experience in doing it. No wonder she does not want to see you again! what pains me more is that this girl is going to go through life looking at men and thinking all men make love like brutes like you. Dude, if I were you I would go look for this girl and ask for her forgiveness and explain to her that all men do not make love like brutes as you have done.

I think the state of the economy has a lot to do with current trends of greed in the system.

Having been around a few of the West African cities, I would say Black American men score a lot of brownie points in Ghana as compared to other West African countries. As a matter of fact, a lot of Black American tourist trips go to Ghana for the "Slave trade history experience". Invariably a few Black US guys hook up with the Ghanaian chicks. I have even seen US Army boys on leave from Iraq in Accra and Kumasi in Ghana, hanging out in bars with their sweethearts. I am not sure I have seen any such in, Lome, Cotonou or Lagos for that matter. That is not to say it does not happen. Just appears more often in Ghana than not.

You are a grown man. You do not need anybody to tell you things don't add up. It is common sense that a woman that loves you does not leave you for that length of time and keep mum on return. If you were to marry her, how do you know the past will not repeat itself? hm? Communication is the key here. Tell her your concerns and if she still aint' willing to tell you what hapened in those missing 9 months, then you may want to consider walking away.

That is why they say life can be a bitch sometimes. Some good girls are attracted to boys gone bad. That's just the way it is.

So what is wrong with getting a little freaky in the backrow in church? I think she was trying to create some excitement in what I suspect must be a extremely boring romantic life for her. From your comment, you sound boring, un-creative, conventional and lacking impulsiveness. You keep embarrassing her in public like that and one day, she is going to go look for some one some where who will give her that freakiness and excitement she is craving for, that you seem to think is making her go crazy.

Everywhere has its up and downs. racism, tribalism what's the difference? I would rather work in an organisation in UK where there are equal opportunities and diversity policies than take my chances with a tribalistic boss in Naija. At least in UK racism is a criminal offence and people do get convicted. I don't know if tribalism is a criminal offence in Naija. Loneliness? You got lonely people in Nigeria too. You make friends as you want and where you want to. Cold? So what? You got unbearable heat in Abuja, that is why everybody wants an AC car or home. I don't get your point at all Personally, I would rather live in the UK than Naija anyday. Got a fair job which pays the bills. Finished my crib back home, which I doubt I could have done in naija unless I was a thief or lucky to work in a good coy which is only for the few. I am content to be in the UK. I am happy to be in UK. Anyone who wants to live permanently in Niaja, by all means do not hold back. Go have fun and good luck. It is a matter of choice, but do not slag the UK off, just because somebody or something bit you or your arse and caused you grief. Like an earlier poster said, you can go to Tesco or Sainsbury at midnight, try going to your local supermarket in the middle of the night in naija, and when you make it safely come back and tell how you survived. All the best.

I think if you are old enough to accept the responsibility (financial, maturity, empathy, etc) that comes with caring and raising a family, then you are old enough to marry. That could be 16 or 60.

I think it would be wrong to blame the immigrants who travel abroad to look for  a better life. While it is extremely misguided to try to enter the western world illegally or use agents to attempt entry or risk ooneslife doing so, the real criminals are the national leaders (and big time bankers and businessmen) who deny these people the right to a basic means of livelihood in their home country. The leaders that steal money and resources meant for development and for the nation's interest and stash it away wherever they do. Those are the real criminals. These folks are just victims.

What a horrible situation to be in. I bet if Mr. Plantain seller had a godfather, he would have seen prompt justice. As he is a nobody, nothing will happen to the guilty policeman. Maybe a little reprimand from the police bosses to the guilty policeman. I will bet you good money the reprimand will be perhaps that next time guilty policeman shoots, he should shoot to kill the plantain seller and call him an "armed robber". That way no questions would be asked. Nigeria - What a great country!

Of course there are gay men in Naija. back in the day when I used to go night crawling from school. You would see enough gay men, transvestites, she-males along Ribadu Road Ikoyi in the wee hours, looking for pick ups, fast bucks and quickies. I do not know if they are still hanging out there, but they used to be there.

Hi, I think there are fashion horrors on both sides. Naija men and Naija women. Some men dress ghastly and horribly.   Then again, if you really want to step up your dress sense, you got to look at yourself, identify your personal style and go with that flow. I am all against following latest fashions blindly, especially if you cannot carry it off well. Look for your inner beauty, what brings out the best in you, what makes you look good and feel good, and does not offend on-lookers sensibilities. And if you see some one who has better dress sense than you have, and you are tempted to look and copy, by all means do! There is no shame in copying, provided you do it well and do it with originality. Enough said.

How ridiculous is that? So because one chap took his woman to UK and had a nasty experience suddenly means others should or should not take their women abroad? I think this discussion point is skirting close to stereotyping all women who follow their hubbies to UK as potential marital rebels. It is offensive if anyone thinks that all women who travel to UK or indeed even living in UK feel so empowered as to want to challenge their husbands and in-laws. Of course there are bad eggs in the UK, no doubt there are bad eggs in Naija too. The wife and hubby probably had unresolved issues that escalated when they went to UK. I doubt that a UK visit is long enough for a marriage to break down unless the sh*t has been going on long before. Please leave UK out of this equation.

Everybody is entitled to their own opinion and that is what being on this forum is all about. I think all haters of people expressing an opinion that they do not think Rita Dominic is all that should pack it in and step off. For my part, I do not think Rita Dominic is all that. She is okay but she is not any more prettier than other African sisters you see anywhere else. Her acting skills? So she has exposure as an actress but, I do not see her as an exceptional actress. Her acting is a bit wooden at times and the make up does come across a bit excruciating at times. Character building plots for her are far in between and I guess that may not necessarily be her fault but the script writers. Having said that, I just don't see how she has it going on. Nah definitely not.

Love? Love is when you lose your damn mind and you think nothing else in the world matters anymore. You are totally in love with this woman/girl you are fixated on. You cannot sleep, you cannot eat, you cannot function if you do not hear or see your baby. Your education ceases to matter, your future ceases to matter, your parents do not matter, your bosom friends do not matter. Advice from older folks who know better does not matter. All that matters is you and your girl against the world, and you believe no obstacle is insurmountable. I think that is what love is.