₦airaland Forum

Babalegba:
➜Most times I've agreed with many of your controversial stances on this forum but this time I beg to differ.
➜ There should be a clear difference between human behavior and gorilla behavior.
➜ Firstly the o.p cannot be trusted to have provided us with all the facts as he operates outside societies moral code.
➜ Slapping his uncle is a symptom of his moral bankruptcy and other atrocities lurk in his being. He is capable of much more since he has no brakes.
➜ I used to know a guy like that without a reasonable moral compass,he used to forcefully sleep with any woman that entered his flat. He defended himself by arguing that he did not hold a knife to their throats. He even raped a fourteen year old girl.
Slapping your uncle is completely verboten unless you are a gorilla.
You can write whatever you want on the Internet but I'm sure you will not want your daughter to marry a man that slaps his uncle.
He should have called a family meeting..A man without control is an animal.

1. If you know me so well, then you should also know that I stick to the facts, but meaningless things and gobbledegook like non-codified traditional ideas, which seem more like an entitlement-driven system that is so far away from justice and truth at the end of the day. (Your traditional systems rarely seem to benefit or stand on the side of victims but perpetrators.)

2. Research shows that humans are actually so many times worse than gorillas and other primates in the way they deal with each other. 🥱🥱

3. OP has not asked for your trust and does not need it. Unless you yourself have a way of going around him to privately investigate the facts for yourself, you and I have no alternative but to address the situation as presented by OP. 🥱🥱🥱

4. I don't believe in any of your standards of morality. To this day, your pastors/imams/traditional leaders/elderly/etc happen to be some of the most vile beings who walk the planet. But guess what? Your morality nonsense presents them with excuse after excuse for why they should continue to prey on the weak and the low. That is wickedness to me. 🥱🥱🥱

5. Please spare me the meaningless stories. I have read enough of those same bullsheet that I heard so many times during my childhood, only for me to realize later on that these stories never applied to the rich and/or powerful in the communities. Against the poor and helpless, tradition is a literal weapon of subjugation and misery! 🥱🥱🥱

1 Your home is an example of what happens to children when a mother chooses to remain in an abusive marriage.

Your mother chose to endure an abusive marriage — physical, financial, and mental abuse at least — and ended up with nothing but trapped herself with 4 children. At the same time, the man still gets to walk away free to maybe start a new family with another woman elsewhere.

2. Worse, you, her son, physically assaulted/abused your 21-year-old brother, and are here telling us as though you did absolutely nothing wrong. What is sad is you probably also do not see that the reason you are fine with abusing your brother happens to be linked to the fact that you watched your father abuse your mother and maybe even your siblings for long enough to convince you that it is OK behavior, when it isn't.

Apologize to your brother and accept that he is not you and you are not him. Talk to him and listen carefully to what he has to say so you know for a fact whether he is, in fact, doing badly, or it is just your perception of things that has been clouding your judgment all this time. I made a similar mistake with my younger brother when I was around your age. But fortunately, I realized the error of my ways and decided to help my brother in his dreams after learning that he was not wrong in wanting to do his own thing.

As for your mother with her codependent clinging and enabling of him, I suggest you talk to her and cut her off if you have to, so she does not use your resources in supporting that which you don't like. My guess is she was probably born around the 1970s, like I was, meaning she is not too old to go get herself her own work and money. So, encourage her to go out there to find her own life now that she has removed the shackles of being married to abuse from herself.

3. The woman now sees you as a replacement for her husband; she had obsessively clung to your father for so long against common sense, feeling she deserved to reap something out of it, and probably now sees you as the one to give her all the love and care she was never able to receive from her husband. Very sad codependency situation going on here.

4. If you don't want a fight, you need to tell your mother the truth, and you need to let her know that she needs to face her situation as she ought to finally do so. 🥱🥱

5. If you love your mother, you should never allow her to go back to a man who abused her for so long. If you don't understand what abuse it and what it does to a person's mental, emotional, and physical well-being, I suggest you begin researching to learn the truth.

Babalegba:
➜ This kind of talk will not make people respect your parents or whoever brought you up. I'm ashamed on your behalf and I believe you are not from the south west.
➜You don't have a clue what life is about,such things have to happen in order for the human being to build character. Sorry I don't have time for this disgusting matter. I'm fairly certain that the o.p is not from the south west anyway.

Keep your shame for you and your parents, abeg!

If having a clue means reasoning like you and your ilk, I am glad I and my blood refused to tread that path in life. 🥱🥱🥱

12345baba:
➜but u didn't die. Learn how to control ur temper. This ur experience reminded me of my late brother , always ready to beat any elder that steps on him, e no end well fr am sha cos he died at age 36 leaving 2kids and a wife. Honour ur father and mother so ur days will be long, na my bro case b that. Try dey ignore those elder guys.

You are a terrible brother for choosing to sum up your late brother's efforts in possibly standing up against bullies in the way you did here. 🥱🥱🥱

martinskelly:
➜ I would have used "Some people" instead of "Everyone"…..
➜ but my point is; nigerian law does not always take it's full course regarding the incident between op and his uncle due to the nature of how it happened.
➜ If i may ask; Which law are you even talking gan gan? Is it the Nigerian constitutional law, the police law or the elders of the village traditional law because i don't really get this law thing you just yearn o.
➜ There are things done in the family that stays in the family, no be everything be law na; Somethings are resolved amicably without third party interference.
➜ And if you dig deep you might be surprise to see that this things are not as serious as the Op painted it to be. Now again, has the uncle being assaulting the Op prior to the "slap in the back" or was it just an overwhelmed behavioral act of superiority with the Op. I rest my case.

1. I am not you, so I will stick with using "everyone" in this case.

2. It does not matter your personal opinion on this. What is utmost is that there is a legal code and every citizen is required to, to the best of their ability, abide by it and enforce it where authorized by the law to do so. 🥱🥱

3. Are you merely here to waste your time thinking you waste mine by it? 🥱🥱

4. Are you merely here to waste your time thinking you waste mine by it? 🥱🥱

5. Please endeavor to avoid me with this ridiculous nonsense! 🥱🥱

tioyoung:
U will grow old What u sew u will reap

That means his uncle too reaped exactly what he sowed, abi? 🥱🥱

Funny enough, this una law never seems to affect the rich except in your Nollywood movies. 🥱🥱

Kukutente23:
It will amaze you. While you claim that rape laws of Nigeria prescribed jail, Sharia law in the north prescribes flogging not jail

You shouldn't make side comments when you're totally ignorant. Instead, you should seek information and get properly enlightened. Umuada is a gathering of firstborn women and mothers in Igbo communities whose duty is to preserve culture and tradition and not to protect uncles and grannies. You clearly see that it was umuada that banished him not his family members.
Take your own advice about investing in language comprehension so you don't keep missing simple info and making wild guesses.

Try to avoid with your brand of silliness! 🥱🥱🥱

Kukutente23:
✓ And how do you know that everyone in Nigeria knows that rapists go to jail
How did you know that those who suggested banishment are members of the man's family and they did so to keep him out of jail

You mean there are areas in that country where people have never experienced or have knowledge of existence of criminal laws in Nigeria? 😮😮😮😮

2. I don't know....I suppose..hence the use of the word likely suggesting a possible motive. 🥱🥱

Please, endeavor to invest in language comprehension courses this year. 🥱🥱🥱

FreeStuffsNG:
✓ Slap na poor man and bolekaja thing abeg. I didn't even see my father have physical altercations with anyone so where will I learn it.
If a poor man slaps me like that his uncle slaps me, I will just ignore. May I not be unfortunate to be caught in "two fighting " with such a poor and miserable fellow.

And then you all wonder why Nigeria is lawless when no one thinks it makes sense to enforce the law. 🥱🥱🥱

Babalegba:
✓ Nigeria is gone and there's nothing Tinubu and obi can do about it. The citizens lack control, temperance and perseverance. A society like that will fail.
The north is on the brink and the southern part will follow soon.
Young man unfortunately you are a disgrace to your ancestors. Sane humans prize control, patience and good character. I hope that you posted this under a new moniker otherwise nairalanders would not respect those involved in your upbringing.
You are in the world to learn. Shame on the people supporting you..

Your society failed not because of this young man but because of old men like his uncle who believes he is entitled to commit misdemeanors and get away with it because of his age. 🥱🥱

When you all start respecting your own laws, then you can talk of having a society that has hope. 🥱🥱

Blakjewelry:
So the rich and wealthy don't grow old and weak too?

I don't follow! 🥱🥱🥱

FreeStuffsNG:
✓ You think that I meant do no slap him back is same as tolerate the nuisance?Smh.I don't do cheap talk o

You get slap measuring meter to determine slap intensity, abi? 🥱🥱🥱

Kukutente23:
✓ Is it about wickedness or the failure of the Nigerian state to fully govern and enforce its laws within its territory
✓ And what does poverty have to do with this for Kobo's sake

It is pure wickedness because everyone in Nigeria knows that even with the system as ridiculous as it is, rapists do go to jail if their crimes are reported to the authorities and maybe even the women affairs office. 🥱🥱

2. Those who did this.. suggested he be banished instead... likely did it to keep their uncle or father out of jail. 🥱🥱

FreeStuffsNG:
✓ Yes ma. You pick your battles wisely. He is a low hanging one and win or lose does nothing to you.
He is physically weaker and poor, the family will judge you harshly. On top what? Not worth it in my opinion o

An assumed low hanging fruit committed a misdemeanor against someone and you determined all by yourself that he is not worth dealing with in accordance to the law because? Police wey dey slap una everyday for Nigeria, dem be low hanging fruits too? 🥱🥱

FreeStuffsNG:
✓ You should have just ignored him 😒

Ignore him because he is a special kind of arsehole that should remain untouchable? 🥱🥱🥱

Glimpsetv:
✓ A Nigerian lady has gone viral after revealing how her boyfriend allegedly threatened to leave her and their unborn child unless she sent him ₦50,000.
The shocking video captures the lady taking a live call from the man while explaining the situation to viewers. During the call, he repeatedly pressed her to send money, claiming that if she didn’t, he would not return from his village and she would be left to struggle alone with her pregnancy.
The lady explained that she only had ₦30,000 and could not meet his demand. He reluctantly accepted the ₦30,000, but also demanded transport fare and ₦1,000 airtime for himself, insisting it was for him to “enjoy life in the village.”
In the video, the lady confronted him, asking why he seemed so heartless and why he wasn’t concerned about how she was surviving with his baby. The man continued to pressure her, but she calmly agreed to send the requested amount.
The incident has sparked heated debate online. Many social media users condemned the boyfriend’s behavior and urged the lady to reconsider the relationship before things worsen. Others expressed disbelief at the audacity of demanding money from a pregnant partner.
This story highlights the challenges some women face in relationships and has reignited conversations around responsibility, respect, and support during pregnancy.

This is obviously a form of blackmail and what this girl needs is a social worker to help her navigate this situation and ensure that boy is sued and made to pay for not just the child but the crime. Why do mothers keep having children they are clearly not equipped to adequately raise and train. How can the child of anyone be in this situation and nor immediately realize there is a problem. 😩😩😩

martinskelly:
✓ The funny thing is this, nobody ever gets to hear from the uncle whether it was actually a "slap in back" or just a "tap in the back"; you know how most of this our uncle's in the village does things.
I'm not justifying wrongdoings, but the fact still remains that everyone on this forum is justifying your actions base on you being the first "narrator".
Your uncle could have being wrong though but you see Africans especially Nigerians will always judge things based on culture, ideology, traditions, norms, environmental experiences etc.

Wrong! No one is providing him justification; what someone like me Instead did is assert that based on his story that he merely returned the favor, and what the law says, he is not in the wrong. 🥱🥱

If the uncle hadn't hit him -- and yes, there is a culture of hitting if younger individuals among the elderly in Nigeria -- the law would have been squarely against OP. 🥱🥱

The fact that the man may have been drunk at the time does not change anything of what the law says of this issue. Neither does his age matter for anything where the law for all adults is concerned. Both the elder and young are held equal where the law is concerned and hence expected to adhere to the letter of the law no matter what. Anyone of advanced age ought to understand and know this. 🥱🥱

vicmed1:
Very bad indeed. He doesn't have a wife?

Oh, do he should have been raping his wife instead? Is that it? 😩😩😩😩

BlackViper:
✓ https://www.facebook.com/share/p/17rQ8FwyaN/

Provided this story js true, this man djd the right thing regardless of how cruel the Nigerian police was to him. 😩😩😩

Kingsley34:
....

Village people are wicked! That man should be rotting in jail if indeed he raped the woman in question but see as dem don give an to go rape other people children instead? Poor people are wicked ..no be small. 🥱🥱🥱🥱

steadygo:
✓ Why are you making yourself look poor in critical thinking? You see what the original post asked then you are asking me why I assumed I could respond here in a thread asking questions about God.
Please do not reply me again since you are "so sleepy". You do not need to be in here if these conversations are too boring for you.

Original poster was up from about the topic having to be in reference to the Christian pantheon. 🥱🥱🥱

Emmanuel30a:
✓ Maybe he should asks those who have given birth the meaning of life... Have you gives birth...?

Would that include those who killed/abandoned/have up for adoption that which they birthed? 🥱🥱🥱

Antichristian2:
✓ "Can God die" is not the same as "Can god die"!
Seems you've been waking up from the wrong side of the....

Your God is someone else's god. 🥱🥱🥱

Seems more like denial remains a staple for you. 🥱🥱🥱

Newgirl206:
✓ Just over a week after giving birth via C-section, I decided to have sex with my husband because he is so addicted to it and I just wanted to please him. During the act, he pulled away. I asked what happened, and he said he wasn't enjoying it. It really hurt me. I didn't say a word; I just started begging him to please let us try again.

✓ The next day, I pleaded with him that if I had done anything wrong, I was sorry. I cried and begged. He kept insulting me.
One day, I couldn't take it anymore and I insulted him back because the pain was too much, especially since I had just given birth. He left home, blocked me on WhatsApp, and blocked and deleted my number. I pleaded for days before he managed to forgive me. After a month, my mom left. My mom didn't even know we were having issues because I don't like discussing my husband's matters with anyone.

OP, any man who has sex with a woman just post cesarean, does so,not out of love but wickedness and hate for that woman. He was not addicted to sex or you, nor was he not able to control himself. Your husband was well aware of the restriction given by the doctors, but chose to ignore it and your health too.

As for why you allowed him have sex with you, knowing fully well that you were supposed to not have sex until at least many weeks after to allow that huge hole in the body to heal..you did not know it out of love. You hated yourself and you valued yourself little. It was not love for your husband that mae you do it, but rather an addiction to getting or wanting his validation that drove you to risk your own health to please him. He probably coerced and convinced you that you needed to give in to him even though your doctor was clear that you shouldn't do that too. That is manipulation, not love. 🥱🥱🥱

2. Again, what you are on reads like an addiction which is what obsession really is. It is not love but a constant craving for validation from the object of ones obsession. And this man knowing you were obsessed with him, manipulated you as much as he could. He has no ounce of love for you. And you need to detox from those chemicals your brain has been high on for you to really visit the reality of all that has happened to you. 🥱🥱

steadygo:
➜You either have not properly understood the original question given or are making assumptions yourself while accusing me of doing the same.
➜Anyways, let's leave it at that since from all the yawning emojis, you're bored of the conversation you chose to engage in of your own volition and with your own two hands lol.

This question?

Disinfectant123:
Need to say more? Christians getting killed around the world and God responding with "I have a plan" What Plan? Allowing their heads being blown off?

2. OK🥱🥱🥱

JibolaUsman:
➜Speaking in tongues have not Ended and neither have signs and Wonders. The problem is fake tongues are rampant. Only Jehovah Witnesses who are just as erroneous as the Catholics will say signs and wonders have past. Jesus says" in my Name you will lay hands on the sick and they shall recover " Jesus has not Changed in 2,000 years. Even the signs and wonders he did were not a big deal. The prophets before him raised the dead to life. God does not Change. Did Moses not perform signs and Wonders ? Elijah nko ? If Jehovah Witnesses do not understand how to pray and get results they should not say signs and wonders have passed away because I can perform miracles myself on myself.
➜ I'm a living testament that God cures sickness and disease.

Christianity boasts of over 46000 different interpretations — we are talking of a Patheon here of Christian gods. So, which of the different gods are authentic and which are not?

2. Miracles happen every single day, even to those who don't have gods they believe in or pray to — the irreligious. Are these miracles also a testament of your Christian patheon that they do not believe in?

Odingo1:
➜After all my suffering in the university and upon graduation no work, I managed start up a business that is yielding fruit after 4 years of hardworking, someone will come and set me ablaze in name of marriage. Someone that I am footing all her bills including starting a business for her.

You are responsible for getting yourself to safety when you are in a threatening situation. Paying her bills does not change this fact. So, you need to decide whether you are ready to get away from possible danger and choose yourself over this marriage. 🥱🥱

What nonsense is this? 🥱🥱🥱🥱

Mikedel80:
It's well. We shall find a way around it or over it or through it

You both have only one life to live, and the same goes for your child. If you both resolve to be unhappy in marriage, that decision will severely impact the happiness of your child... children raised in unhappy homes struggle to have healthy adulthoods. In simple terms, they end up no better than the average Nigerian youths out there in the way they reason and resolve life. 🥱🥱

Mikedel80:
➜Don't say that bro. I like her so much.
➜ I can't go and invest millions to marry someone I don't like. I carried my family, friends and my umunna to go and marry her. I like her that was why I married her. One thing I like about her up till this moment is her energy. She is energetic.

Action, they say, speaks volumes louder than words. (Money is not action.) That is a fact of human behavior and life in general. 🥱🥱

2. The vast majority of men out there are married to women they settled for. And yes, they too paid so much for the wedding, and all that was involved. 🥱🥱🥱