₦airaland Forum

I have too many admirers and please no insults, I'm serious. I'm single, in that I am in no serious relationship maybe dating and some asking me out and getting to know them. I find myself spending time with one particular guy, the short dude I talked about but sometimes I sit back and think about all the other ones I'm forsaking, not knowing what they have to offer and I feel bad. P.S since I'm still young.

What can I possibly do?

Siena:
Strangely, a lot of the guys on here scolding the OP for having reservations about dating a shorter guy, are the same ones that swore they would not date a taller woman, in the thread "would you date a shorter guy"? This thread was to the ladies, though guys did chime in.

It's clear the lady here is not 100% committed to her man, otherwise the question of what family / friends would think of her dating a shorter guy wouldn't arise. And there's nothing wrong with her not being comfortable dating / marrying a shorter guy, that's her choice, so she can hardly be scolded for having reservations. Everyone has a choice, you can't use your preferences / taste to alter someone else's perception as to what works for them.

Lacrissa, as I said before, only you can decide what's right for you. It's not good getting married to a guy you're not 100% committed to, if you're worried about what others think of your choice, and this leads you to ask the opinion of faceless people on a discussion board, I can see issues cropping up in the future, which may in turn lead you to resent your man.

Good luck!

Thank you for understanding. I never said I won't be committed afterall, he is attractive, what you would call a good man, I only complained about his height but that does not mean I can't be committed to him.

Dimka 76:
LWKMD! Oh Crissy, don't let dat deter you . What if he was tall and had bad breath? My mum was slightly taller than pops too but they still made a handsome couple. But she had to cut down on the really high heels though, small price to pay if you ask me. Your post is lovably silly! Haahaahaaaa! O God, Chicks!

O.k. I am 6'2 , dark, handsome, But I nag, I am selfish, vindictive and snore, you still wanna switch? LOooooool.

Better start being very nice to him. knowing women you probably treat him funny cos yoou think you deserve better.

Funny girl.

Don't be scared, your children won't be pygmies!

Keep your nagging, selfishness and just pass the height over

Odunnu:
I dnt knw d parts whr u are bt here whr I am a gal 5.7 in height aint short abeg

Help me tell him lol, 5'7 short for a girl?

emeka29:
short or tall, what eveybody is praying for is the right person. meanwhile u r short too from your definition and yet u r considered pretty. what am saying is that the content of a man remains irrespective of his height. after all AKI AND PAWPAW later married. could your guy be shorter?

I agree with you. He seems pretty good for keeps, like I said, just something new.

obilizy:
@poster, sori if i sound the way i do
should i say "U DONT KNOW WAT U WANT"
u sound too fake, the major tins one wants in a relationship
is found in this guy, your are here talkin of hieght difference
i tink u need to grow up, hw old are u, 15?

why would you think I don't know what I want, just because I said I'm confused about dating a shorter man? I never said I don't like him because his short, I'm only saying my worries about dating dating a shorter guy.

jay bee:
well if that's d case then i don't c why it should be an issue.
What happens if you do decide to leave and find the over 6 ft tall guy but he lacks in the other important/necessary departments?

tayore:
What has Height got to do with it? What exactly do you want in a relationship? Are you sure you want the real thing?

@jaybee, i agree, i'll give it a trial i guess

@tayore
well in as much as we say the inside matters, we know the physical somehwat does matter too,

jay bee:
The difference between yours and his

LOL, i meant we both are like 5'7 or he mite b 5"6.

Thanks guys I just needed encouragement and advice. I have never been a with a shorter guy but he makes me happy, laugh, focused, just something new, but I do appreciate your opinions.

@daduke2k
Lol heeled shoes? ewww on a man?

@190- is it necessary

@jaybee, prolly like 5"7

@odunnu
we r the same heighr or i'm somewhat taller not to talk of heels

MRbrownJAY:
^^^^^you cant have it all in life. we can clearly see that you are attracted to this man but yet dont want to commit to him because of family and friends issues. since you are not ready to make an adult decision and stand by your choices (and your man)  then let the adults in your life make it for you. lol!

if you believe that you can please EVERYONE around in your life, yourself included, then you have some growing up to do. . . . . . . . . . .  wont happen, as there will always be someone who doesnt agree with your choices. the catch is to not give a damn as it is YOUR choices and YOUR life.
dont take my words negatively, they are actually very positive!
PS: if he was rude, agressive, (even poor) i would understand BUT A LITTLE SHORTER THAN YOU?!?!?!?!?!

Thanks mrbrown j, but u know naturally, we women prefer our guys taller. He would be the first guy shorter than i am that i am attracted to and not that i can't stand for myself, only worried how the outside would see it and if i am really ready for this, a shorter person.

MRbrownJAY:
thinking the way you do i see only ONE solution: why dont you ask your parents and friends to choose someone for you so that you are sure that they will be please by "your"choice of man.

you are living your life through their eyes, you might as well sit back and let them take charge of your life.

C'mon mrbrownj, how can i sit back and let my parents choose a man for me? i'm sure you truly and really understand where i'm coming from. if i wasn't interested in this guy, i won't be here asking but at the same it's only natural, i worry, if people around me especially my parents would be pleased.

I opened a thread before talking about dating a shorter guy, I am still confused and in a dilemma. I have other guys that are way taller than I am but this particular guy makes me laugh, nice, good, sweet, I enjoy his company but I was looking at some pictures we took, and it looked awkward because of the difference in height. We are like the same height or I'm somewhat taller not to talk of when i wear heels.

I am scared or just thinking, if i should eventually agree and end up with him, what about my parents and friends? Because they see me as very pretty and beautiful that there are zillions of guys out there. I'm just worried, his height might not be appealing. I'm so confused. Please help I don't really know what to do.

No crucifixion pls.

I really hope God forgives me. I just wish intimacy with your loved one not every tom, dic*k and harry, just your loved one wasn't bad. God knows I love him, though I still fornicate as in have intimacy with my loved one. Help

I was in church with my friends so I saw one guy call my friend because they know each other. I overheard them talking and I heard her mention "my friend" and she started laughing saying tell her and was teasing him, but I didn't completely hear everything. So while we were leaving, one of the members there said hello to me and started asking oh please come back again and all, he was just smiling and said yes do. I saw my friend from the side give him two thumbs up and winking at him like "Go boy".

I'm sure in my mind, he was telling my friend he likes me or so I think, I mean he is a good looking man but this morning, I saw this smae friend and she did not or has not mentioned anything to me. Should I just keep quiet, maybe that's not even what they were saying or should I just ask her to let my mind out?

Ladies what age do you consider a man too old for you? What age difference? Guys feel free to add yours.

marocguy:
Crazy. Y cant u catch d younger ones. Are u naturally maltreatd by any way?

Do u know my age? and who says I can't date young guys? Girls naturally like older guys as in not the same age bracket. For example a 20 yr old girl would like from 23 and above I guess.

There is one professor in my school, I think the chairperson of the English department in my university and each time I bump into him, I greet him and I notice he looks at me. I passed by him today and oh my! am I feeling him more but the problem is of course someone like him should be married or he may never bring himself down to talk to me or can anyone suggest what to do to erase this thoughts?

omega25red:
you have a man but you are chilling with a dude who is kissing and touching you (on God knows where) so now he met someone and you are mad because the attention you were getting is gone. Yet you still have a man as you claimed. hmmm i think you should focus on your relationship and stop stringing men along who eventually get tired of waiting.

Omega, I don't presently have a man. It was after my man and I broke up. He is my good friend I've known even though the flirts and him wanting more. I dont like to or want to string any man along but at the same time I don't want to lose any of them.

TewMuch:
your falling for him because you are jealous of the other girls he is with. People always want what looks like they cant have, and especially when the attention is shifting from them. Better snap out of it and face your relationship because this one will shred your heart to bits if you have anything to do with him. just commot eye, and forget about it.

I can have him if I want and I'm not jealous of any girl or girls he's with. I just don't know why I felt a little upset, maybe because he's lying to me? or

There's the guy I've known for 3yrs that has been asking me out but I was already in a relationship and I never really liked him for relationship, just as friends. So he continued, flirting with me and all that. Sometimes when I go to his house, he's all over me, touching me, kissing and still be asking me. I told him, I know he's playing around with girls and not ready for a committed relationship, that he just wants to be benefitting but anyways, he had a party and invited us, so there was a particular girl, he kept talking to at the party, but no need since I'm not interested in him that way.

Today I saw him and the same girl together but this is the person days ago, that was calling and upset because I did not come to his house over night to spend with him. I just want him to be honest with me, so I saw them, the girl saw me and waved, but he didn't see me. I told her to not say anything.

I don't know why I am a little upset, or not or do I have any reason to?

no1madman:
Don't compare oyibos with naija. . .we have cultures and value marriage.
most of those black americans r lost. .we r different from them.

I was also talking about Nigerians, they also cheat, seperate, divorce and all that,

kennz:
As far as im cncern, i can marry a man wu trufuly tell me anytin abt hm. If he hapuns 2be a divorcy nd im cntend wit hs storis, wtz stpin me.

Of course anybody you meet earlier on would sound nice and good, give it time and years to really know who the person is.

Was just thinking to myself especially here in the US, the rate at which marriages are failing amongst the Nigerians and different stories. Then Monique talking of open marriage, then Kate Winslet seperating from her husband and much more. After all these, where's the zeal and urge to get married again

cantell:
@Poster,
There are decisions you ought to make by yourself and this one is definitely one of them.
If being taller is one of the major attributes you want in a guy, there's no point in tryin cos you'll regret it.
I'm a tall guy and i prefer going out with ladies with a height of at least 5ft6- 7 upwards but not more than 6ft.
We all have our different tastes and no one should be denied that.(male or female)
Do what you have to do.
N.B
Sometimes we need to make do with the one we have.

I know, I want a good guy but at the same time being tall @ least taller than I and also being a good guy wouldn't hurt.
I love your last sentence though and I agree.

Scooby1:
Poster, on a serious note nobody is perfect if u know u cant date free him, so he can meet someone who will look beyond the height issue

why the angry face lol i'm not judging him haba

smooooooth:
nothing wrong with it, so far he is not short in mind, spirit, soul and you know where.

Lol, bad boy, he's a good guy but that height thing, i'm so confused.

Scooby1:
nothing wrong with her kneeling down once in a while or him wearing platform once in a while (things we do for love), is all about comprise.

my man wearing platform? eww lol

jimmyxxl:
U said u love him. did he every complain about u wearing it.?

Love? I just met him and a couple of dates, he's interested in me and those dates, Haven't worn heels. I'm just scared of going further if I know there wouldn't be a future with him.

pc guru:
start wearing slippers that'll solve your problem

I have no problems wearing slippers or flats but my worry is so I may never be wearing heels?

madlady:
been there done that bought the t-shirt.

but does that mean u could still go ahead with him and date him?

Girls we know we prefer a guy to be taller than we are. This guy I met, a very good guy and good looking but I think we are the same height if not he's shorter so that means I can never wear heels when together?
If it was you, would u still go ahead with him, even if you prefer taller guys?

I bumped into the girl my ex cheated on me with sometime, and she was supposed to be my friend at least "hello" friend and she's looking very beautiful. Made me feel down after years back, it was like a fresh memory. What can I do to erase this memory very fast, infact erase it forever.

How true is that? How do you know what is yours? Can you find something better that's never yours?

I saw this poster Hollandis and how he thinks a girl above 21 is too old for him, amazes me. Guys what is old for you?

@post
u r the type of person that makes young girls feel old and desperate

ibgoodnews:
at a point like this you need to first lean a lesson and wait until you are ready for it. look you are not ready until u are truly ready. dint let any guy deceive you the moment they reach the place they want to escape and taste another one any guy that cannot wait until after marrage let them go, just don't fill old, but make up your mind and i need to say this nobody knows what the guy had turned you to? maybe you are indeed old because of many abortion. but either ways you can start a new life.

I have never been pregnant neither have I had an abortion. Feeling old mentally and emotionally not necessarily physically.

I am a christian and I strive to do what's right. We all make mistakes.

I've been in a long relationship which he was older and he left me heartbroken. People are saying I'm young and still have time but where's the time? My innocence, those days I was so carefree, never been heartbroken, young are gone. Now I feel like an old woman that justs want to get married, work, instead of me to be enjoying myself. What can I do to change this feeling?