₦airaland Forum

sagamite is on point, when a woman likes u she is nice to u, doesnt make her a nice person. words of wisdom

ferhyntorlah:
I dont see any reason why parents in diaspora cant speak their language to their children. The first language a child should learn to speak is his/her mother tongue. My mum told me of a couple who stayed overseas. They spoke their dialect to all their children while living abroad. Now, the children can clearly speak their dialect. To me, there is no EXCUSE for not speaking your language to your children in a foreign land.

Yeah, we all want our children to speak good English but not at the expense of our language. That's why I admire the Indians & South Africans; everly proud of their language, which is clearly evident in their movies.

thank you my sister. i live in the UK where i can guarantee you a substantial number of chinese, indians, pakistanis speak their local language AS WELL as fluent english in dialect of the area they have been brought up in. nigerians, shame. the average 16 or 17 year old doesnt speak. you ask them where they are from they tell u london. when you probe then they tell u their parents are from nigeria. while technically true it exposes the psyche of these kids. their parents are a strange mix (from those who are waiting on immigration papers, to thise who detest nigeria to those who are ashamed of nigeria and those who feel everything white is good]. o ma se o. its really pathetic. compared to other minorities we are the worst when it comes to imbibing culture in our children abroad. the absolute worst. the funny thing is, you can never outbritish a british person. not in a million years. theres a greater chance of a black person being the king of england. we have to wake up. while the indians and chinese draw you to their culture through food, clothes, music and movies we are constantly trying to deviate from our culture and trying to be oyinbo. oyinbos are never fooled. that is one of the reasons our phoney speaking brothers never seem to get the highest jobs. the real africas[insert koffi annan, ngozi okonjo iweala, chinamanda adozie etc] tend to reach the highest places more than those accented peeps. and they can all speak their respective mother tongues.

it also happens in nigeria cos i remember when i was in secondary school. there were a few students who were banned from speaking the local lingo at home. i mean WTF? those are the children that grow up to look down on people who speak their language in public. o ma se oooooooooooooooooooooooooo

RuuDie:
GBAM!

When Chelsea was mauling teams at the beginning of the season u didn't remember dis 1!

bros league na marathon no be race. na kenyan long distance no be ussain bolt. peaks and throughs bruv. as i said, we will bounce back. and guess what? we will still maul teams. . obviously the momentum is with arsenal now. no question

sadly this trend of not speaking mother tongue is prevalent in diaspora. while diasporans can be excused to an extent[small one albeit], whats the excuse of those in nigeria who cannot speak their mother tongue. its sad

no one wins the league in november. we shall bounce back

[quote author=mama-gee link=topic=549549.msg7132557#msg7132557 date=1289603528][color=deeppink]She's one ugly, trashy thing![/color][/quote]every woman is ugly apart from mama gee

first things first this is Nigeria we are talking about, not UK or US. i feel the settlement offer is decent, she should take it and leave. whats done is done. the years unfortunately are long gone and she has to move on with her life. being bitter is a horrible thing. of cos the man wronged her terribly, but when its all said and done, she has to move on.

engelbert:
I really dont think that this should be a subject of controversy! Hausa Christian and Muslim girls in generality love to kiss and they kiss well too. If your gf doesnt like kissing you, it could mean either of two things; one you have a foul smelly breath which she is barely managing to tolerate or two, she's not down with you as a person and simply wants to take her time to define the kind of relationship she wants to have with you.
Either way, find out what she really wants and you redefine the relationship and if she's still insistent on just merely romancing your face, thighs, dickoko and what have you, then i'll suggest you either propose to her so you can get the 'fulll works' or you call it quits with her, cos my man, a relationship deviod of kissing and kisses is drinking coffee without sugar or cream!

engelbert has spoken

dafuture:
To all those whining and moaning, no be by force. No one is begging you to go to Naija if you don't want to. It is a very serious and personal decision.  Are there plenty of reasons NOT to back to Nigeria? of course! No good schools for yourself or your children if you cannot afford those private schools, the huge electricity problem, high crime rates, a conducive and even nurturing environment for corruption ( it is “understood must settle this 1 and  that 1 ), lack of adequate healthcare; especially if you are poor, bad roads and other infrastructure causing agonizing traffic and accidents that conclude in thousands of death yearly, institutions of higher education strikes forcing people to take what seems like forever to graduate, university graduates with no job prospects, or worse university graduate with no skill(because of ‘expo’ or they pay or bribe someone to pass them, write their papers for them etc), lack of adequate emergency response, no welfare system (homeless children with no family to care for them, amputees and other disabled with no choice but to become beggars),  unrestrained tyranny of those in power, lack of clean drinking water in many areas, several variety of pollution  in many areas,  complete lawlessness as you cannot even make money off your own products (piracy and no strict enforcement of copyright laws etc),  LACK OF SAFETY, tribalism, un -sustainability in many areas of the Country’s welfare, lack of transparency in Government and even Private sector business, cultural disintegration as certain people feel they need to be more westernized and rid themselves of the “old ways”, ethnocentrism  as some other people feel threatened by newer or different ways and want to keep their style of doing things as it is the “best ”(haba, instead of mixing the best of both worlds?), lack of acceptance and respect for differences, HATE and HOSTILITY etc (if you make a suggestion that is unpopular not only will other Nigerians tell you how useless the suggestion is dem go cus you, ya mama and papa too), religious extremism (is religion not a personal relationship one has with their God?, na wetin con cosine you?) and the one that irritates me the most! THE COMPLACENTNESSS OF THE MOANING AND WHINING CITIZENS OF NIGERIA.
Did the U.K or Germany , U.S, or even China not build their Country to where it is now? U tin say it just fall on top their lap? Things are not perfect in the U.S in fact there is homelessness, hunger and even extreme poverty in many parts of the Nation (just look at the rural South). And for the people who brought up the issue of mosquitoes, there are mosquitoes here too! In fact where I stay they do city wide mosquito spraying where the spray large areas at the same time (like a few towns and cities) and issue warning so that people stay inside. They don’t go around handing out nets, that is just not sustainable, na how many mosquito nets u go dash people?.  At one point in the U.S  there was no publicly available electricity, no transportation system, no emergency responders, they even have corruption in their Government (see Watergate scandal) and every so often a new politician is indicted on some charges of fraud. So my fellow Nigerians, I understand that many people have been praying and saying to themselves “e go betta” …However, God no go come down con start to make we Country betta. We have to start making sacrifices in order to contribute to the betterment of our Country one citizen at a time and we must maintain a United front in the process.
U tin say I no fit go skool be doctor? I was a honors pre-med student for 2 years and I never got less than an A- in my program, I could have continued on with this graduated in a few years (well more like 6 -7 lol) and started working to pay off my student loans and mortgage for that big mansion while paying off my BMW car note and taking yearly 2week vacation to somewhere tropical as it is the only time I get to spend with my family out of the 52 weeks there are in a year!(NOT ALL THAT GLITTERS IS GOLD, wahala boku for hea no be small).
ANYWAY, I CHOSE to give that “fantasy” up because I felt that I will be better useful to this world, my Country and myself if I study and get trained in the issues that have always hit close to home and that home for me is and always will be Nigeria. So for those waiting for a ready-made Nigeria, keep waiting o. For those who decide to go to Niaja despite the endless list of aforementioned issues, well done! These are the kind of people we need in Nigeria. You don’t have to go into politics or economic development to change our Country, everybody can contribute in their own way. Nigerians are some of the most highly skilled people in the world, intelligent and very capable to making the west a more livable place, you see them at the top of many agencies in the west…(There are also the not so successful ones but dass anotha gist sha). Why not betta our own Country? The roads need to be designed in a safer and longer lasting manner, nd we get good engineers and architects.  We need electricity, workers need to feel safe, we need to pay our public works officials adequately,  the schools need stability and competent instructors, we need to improve the general wellbeing of our people, we need safe public transportation, well equipped and well managed safety officials, tougher no-nonsense approach to crimes, especially crimes committed to the public like corruption; regardless of the socio-economic status of the criminal, we need equality, we need to start rejecting the bad from the west and accepting only the goods…At the end of the day we also need YOU, YOU that is complaining and being inconvenienced by some of the bad bad things in Nigeria. We need YOU to take action, to organize like minded folks, regardless of tribe or any insignificant “differences”. We need the collective action of Naija citizens to build up our Country out of this sad third world condition. This problem with Nigeria has taken years and the contribution of millions of people to grow into what it is now; it would be naïve to think that only a hand full of people will fix it. We need to organize by the millions, don’t wait for someone to knock on your door to ask you to join the movement, START a movement!. I am sick of Nigeria’s potential dwindling as we waste our time sitting around complaining, hoping and praying, when are we going to get to the “doing” part? Remember all the successful Nations today fought and are still fighting to be where they are, people took risks and people made STRONG EFFORT to make their Country better. Instead of running to another man’s Country why don’t you better your own so that you and future generations can have a stronger pride in our beloved Nigeria?, Again this is for those who are so inclined, for the Diaspora who have made their homes outside Naija and are not so inclined, it is obviously a matter of personal choice which should be respected.

the part i like is the bolded section. our country is presently unable to cater for those who are unable to cater for themselves, namely the disabled and destitute. no social security. your last section on 'doing', not complaining is on point. bullseye

rotimiland:
@ Dafuture,
Thanks for that long but interesting one. God bless you. You spoke objectively. We have no place like home. We will all participate in the Nigerian project. I could not discourage anybody abroad from going home permanently. One just need to understand the terrain very well and be very careful.
I have my projects in Nigeria too. I could move in if I and my organisation get our entitlements by mid next year. It is enough to make a drastic change in Nigeria. An average Nigerian is self-centred, they don't care if others use candles as source of electricity. Once their noice-less generating sets serve them 24/7, Nigeria is okay. This is also reflected in our leaders. What I hate in people is to know the truth and hide it.
I must not say because I live in Banana island, Lagos and i can afford 40million naira car, so Nigeria is okay for all. If I do that I am selfish and wicked.
I must look at the percentage of people living in penury compared to those in affluence, before concluding.
Do you know my organisation was in different law courts in Nigeria and even in America for solid 9YEARS (another Nigerian judicial flaw) with our debtor (Multinational company)? . We thank God we finally won the case late last year.
I have the belief that Nigeria will be great, whether our leaders like it or not.
I reeled out my previous opinions based on the thread topic. It is a personal decision and meant for the time being.

well done brother. a balanced mind is an educated one

thank God he can take care of his kids. do you know how many 'so called responsible' men out there REFUSE to accept kids outside wedlock?

such kids tend to emerge from a will after the man's death, usually, amidst tears and mourning. its happened, and hes taking care of them financially and otherwise. the kids are not destitute. its life.

this is my mild contribution to the piece. until this is fully verified i will take it with a pinch of salt. naija tabloids can be very nasty and soft sell stories seem to be the order of the day. if it is true then its quite unfortunate for all parties concerned. i will adopt the wait and see approach.

this is encouraging news indeed. black people worldwide, whether in the US or UK are the least likely to donate organs when they die. unsurprisingly they are also the least likely to receive an organ when you need one the most. at some point we really have to examine our orientation. he has done a commendable thing that has made me to sit down and have a think whether i could do it, cos we certainly dont need the body whereever we go after death, as the whole body rots eventually to a mass of bones. he was a good man.

modupsie:
u can choose to be alone and lonely for life !

she choose to be a second wife, allow her!
she wants to enjoy marriage as a second wife so let her be!

abeg this thread is tiring sef.

best answer. on that note, moderators pls close this thread. its really none of our business whether she marries, divorces, or separates. its her life and shes living it.if she makes a mistake she will learn. believe me. thats what we all are in the world for. to learn

[quote author=tpia@ link=topic=535298.msg6995434#msg6995434 date=1287777668]look, its a free world and anybody is welcome to be anyone's second, third, or twentieth wife, but i'd assume anyone so inclined, wouldnt be overly sensitive to people's criticism and should have a thick skin.


we all make choices which we have to live with.

if it's your choice to be a polygamous man or woman, good for you but dont go round attacking others for voicing their opinion.

just suck it up and enjoy the man you're sharing. Your man or y'alls man- whichever aplies.

abi the naysayers are sharing him and his goodies with you? so why the rancor.


when you drive by in your new car and see the antagonistic monogamist by the roadside, waiting for okada, be sure to splash him or her with muddy water.[/quote]hehe

merobe:
This lady should just shut it!what is she trying to prove?where has it ever been seen or heard that the first wife ever ok with a second one?If u've seen one just know that she's pretending.It would have been better if she said she couldn't speak on her behalf but that they are trying to get along.Am a first wife and pray to be the last in my husband's house,can't imagine one kereku girl honing in on my territory and expecting me to be ok with it.

well spoken. the first wife can never be happy that her husband is taking another, most accept it, cos sometimes the alternative is outright divorce

[quote author=tpia@ link=topic=535298.msg6995366#msg6995366 date=1287777061]the divorce rate in nigeria isnt that far behind either.

my point is why do we keep glorifying every little thing we call culture yet at the same time run away to the west with a clearly different system which is working for them.

if we're so much attached to our way of life and must attack anyone who doesnt say what we want, then surely we should be able to stay in nigeria and live the talk.[/quote]thats what ive been told as well. enough single mothers. true talk, you cannot use cough syrup to combat a headache. can never work

[quote author=tpia@ link=topic=535298.msg6994765#msg6994765 date=1287770867]anything comes to meet anybody through anywhere. ati husband o, ati wife o.

it's called life.

we are all very happy in nigeria and would never trade that great opportunity to stay in the country, for[size=16pt] an overseas visa. [/size] Our system is an excellent one and we dont kill or hate ourselves.

naija forever.


these westerners and their foreign interferences which dont work.[/quote]life is very complex with plenty complicated conundrums. happy to hear that you are very happy in nigeria. its home and the best treatment one can ever get is in one's own country. our system works. no doubt. westerners may not marry more than one at the same time but the divorce rate aint nothing to write home about, with numerous people marry 2 or 3 times in a lifetime. not too dissimilar to polygamy in my view, just spaced apart

[quote author=tpia@ link=topic=535298.msg6994716#msg6994716 date=1287770373]are we talking of mko abiola, okoya and adedoyin [whoever that is].

i dont see why fear dey catch some people like jello.

case by case basis, thank you.[/quote]very true say. case by case basis. this life sha. we all need prayers. some women hate polygamy but it comes to meet them through their husbands. others go out to search for it or are wooed by the men and they fall for whatever reason. each case is different and the reasons are also different. God will help us.

[quote author=tpia@ link=topic=535298.msg6993107#msg6993107 date=1287757103]well, when the money dries up, that will be a true test of the "love"[/quote]true say but unfortunately some people's money never dries up. examples include

1. MKO abiola. even in the grave his money is still working in nigeria and worldwide
2. okoya
2.adedoyin

ati be be lo

their money aint drying up anytime soon.

Taymi:
i dont understand what you guys meant by saying she married the man because of his money, for crying out loud, the lady is rich in her own way. She has enough money to take care of herself.
You never can tell what attracted her to the man
sometimes you fall in love or settle down with people you never taught you would even have anything to do with.
Although,i'm not in support of her marriage to a man who have his own wife. The woman will definately be sad.
My point is,it might not be because of the money,though is very wrong. I love her{especially in movies} anyway.

please tell them o. shes not broke. not by a long shot.

LouisThoru:
Hhahahaha _ First class citizen in America? A black man claiming to be a first class citizen in America is nothing but a dumb behind MF.


Will you eat the white man's sh.it mixed with his p.ee and juiced with his mu.cus to stay in America? Of course, you will ask for double portion.

word

[quote author=Ileke-IdI link=topic=535298.msg6982598#msg6982598 date=1287625146]

That's all need be said when the argument gets tiring. [/quote]I too gbadun you. You know that anyway! And yes you are right. God bless you too.

Theblessed:
[size=18pt]Thanks for your wonderful advice, I don't need it, ok! Glad you now have realised you'd tried so many times but failed, how many more times would you and your likes continue---!!

Look, there's something called 'PASS'. I think you should do so a lot more when you come across my essays on here, please! Tell, others!

Since you can't read my work because of the size of the font, why do you attempt to do so? Is it to provoke?

Again, you don't 'NEED' to read my work, ok!  Everyone has right to do what they want and this is mine, RESPECT IT !![/size]

God bless you