₦airaland Forum

tubouncen:

Very ooooooold gist

True, but it might be new to some people

#copied#
This go me laughing

Next2Bezee:
Lol when she was chopping money she didn't care or even want to know where the money was coming from ba

Oloshi! Kenyan women are greedy whores.

Using your reasoning, Nigerian men are greedy scammers.

Toks2008:
I bind every form of monitoring spirit by fire in Jesus name...Ada abeg kpa chara n yagi.

Bros, dis your comment caught me off guard- I almost fell from the seat.

Ifakiland:
met an old friend in a bus, was Happy seeing her...after d greetings and all, I tot I'd be a gentleman and pay her tfare. "conductor take for two"....den she shouted from d back seat "we are four oo"....i paused, den d gals with her started saying hiiiii, helllooooo.
so I told conductor, take for me alone....den she got angry o.
was I wrong?

Smart guy

She has learnt that it was a favour and not a right.

schumastic:
he returned the lady back without asking for his bride price money

That's wicked nah
Am sure he's now scared of turbans

Marrying a man that can cook is a big advantage.

1. When you are sick he can cook.
2. When you are tired, he can cook.
3. You can cook together... bonding.

In short there are more advantages than disadvantages. If a lady feels threatened by her man's cooking she should ask him to teach her.

Solidkay:
My dear u r a gonner,u supposed hubby is hiding a very biiig secret frm u which m pretty sure if u find out u will use d exit door,
Reminds me of a brother in Deeper Life in Benin,his wife has been tying her turban since their courtship days till they married,yet she wont put it off even when they make luv,mnths into d marriage d husband was forced to remove it,that was wen he found out that his wife has a small horn in d middle of her head.

That's so scary! What did the brother do?

ellahzy:
Mercy's jean don tear so its Linda

JJJC:
Honestly I hate liars

Sir, by any chance are you Mustapha(no offence)? The kind of evidence you provided left me speechless.

Truth is bitter....the truth is that with this kind of evidence, if she decides to go to court, she will not win.

utenwuson:
op. after u finish trying all d advises given above n he didn't learn try mine,

since he obeys and worship u, give him punishment, slap him, tell him 2 do frog jump, tell him 2 cook, clean d toilet, wash d plate, wash ur pants n keep punishing him!

one day, just one fateful day! he ll hold ur hand in d air and say "woman, am tired, am tired of u maltreating me! then d man in him ll rise up 2 ur occasion n he ll beat d hell outa u! u myt even faint n collaps but don't worry! u ll stil come here 2 create another thread on how ur hubby is a dangerous man

I just can't stop laughing
The op should apply this to get her desired results

That's horrifying
The guy should have left her and gone for another girl.

PapaNnamdi:
its swahili

it means shutdaforkorp

You can lie for Africa...the Swahili word for that is "Nyamaza"

That is a teenager

Eddygourdo:
the caning didn't work. Those kids have iron bombom. Kpele, next time you wanna show bravado make sure nobody is around cos kids of these days have phones with camera and nairaland isn't far to post a thread Reading "come and see how our aunty disgraced the family name"

You are so right...I have learned my lesson.

menix:
I noticed one thing, most people who re bereaved of a Loved one by Electric shock re fond of advising people to go hug transformer..

Sorry u lost someone who bathed on a transformer.
But I think am wiser than that member of ur family who was a stunt artist..

Sorry eeh..

Am wowed!!! You know so much about my family! Congrats!!!
*Clap for yourself*

FYI: My family members aren't as foolish as you. You know why? Because when confronting people they do it only with whoever wronged them. They do not include family members of that person.

Eddygourdo:
hahahahahaha. Sorry for laughing, eh ya. Their big aunty jumping around in horror. Hope you caned them toll they forgot the incident. My dear whether the paint dries or not I will sleep there like that. Can't go back to that house soon. Will sneak in very late one night to pack my belongings. Can't endure looking into the eyes of people who saw me stark naked, lest I see a smirk and smack it off the person's face.

It shall be well

That night the boys refused to sleep. They were giggling all through. I told them to keep quiet and sleep, but they said they couldn't control it. So we agreed that I cane them for the laughter to go away. I did ...it accelerated their laughter so I gave up. My elder sister said, "If I come there...eee!" and the boys became quiet.

Eddygourdo:
Dats better. Thanks dear

You're welcome

I hope the paint dries and you go to your house.

On a lighter note...rats will now become your worst enemy . Am sure you will not allow a rat to live in your house

Your own is better....

2 months a go I saw a caterpillar on the wall (I really fear them). My sisters took off and I remained with my nephews (6, 4, 3 years old). I took a broom and removed it. As I was taking it out, I realized the door was locked (it was at night). So I persuaded one girl (sis) to come and open the door. By the time I was going out I could not find that *animal*.

I took the broom out and returned to look for it. Still I could not find it. The boys started making fun..."Aunt Lady.X it's there...it's on your leg, etc)" All this while I was jumping up and down. When I finally gave up, they started laughing at how I fear caterpillars (small pikin dey laff at me )

menix:
Will you shut up.
It goes to show u re an NTA fan, Aljazerah have a documentary running about the massive killing of people suspected of practicing witchcraft in Kenya.

Calling him a Kenya breed is more like an Idiom nd not blaming any country.

Ok let me drive ur way, Buhari should be blamed for ur comprehension issues.
Hope u can now crucify me

Who are you to tell me to shut up?
Is it your mouth am using? Is it your phone/computer, or data/internet am using?

Whatever NTA is, am not a fun of it

You can blame Buhari for all you want (It's you blaming him not me )

As for the last part, I don't give a hoot about *online warriors* so go hug a transformer

Eddygourdo:
All these pretty ladies laughing at me. na only fine face una get? No good heart to pity me or feel the pains humiliation. I trust most of u would have been wide eyed like those silly female neighbours I have, odikwa mma

Op, Pele.

It's a sad story, but picturing what happened made me laugh (my colleagues must be wondering).

Tell your friend to find a way of getting rid of those rats.
Sorry o!

menix:
The man should have tried this Promo stunt b4 concluding;
* Buy a coffin for ur deceased nd get another free.
* Buy Coffin nd get my son Ogada as Abobaku.


Nna menh, that man wickedt gan, he should ve sent the son back to the mum instead of trying to kill him, that man must be a Kenya breed.

Instead of condemning evil in society you are blaming another country.
No wonder some Nairalanders always blame Buhari for everything. With this mentality I wonder when people will progress

SkinnyDude:
dont you have family?? go back to ur family if you are lonely

He could be in the city while his family is in the village.
Be kind to him, please... He is going through a tough phase right now. The least you can do is to show him some love.

*hugs*
There is a season for everything. This season of sadness will end some day and you will look back and smile.

Receive some warm hug

Oyind17:
My friend is in love

How are you?

MrCork:
^^^^^ther u go....didnt I warn u people she waz gonno fall in love the moment I post the thread. ..the chick is in love (truss me)

This made my evening
I wonder what you are like in real life

Does a white person speaking local languages make him smarter than the locals?

MrCork:
..ok then let me start witdis one...*baby..I want somebory to love me for me not becuzz I drive £28'000 (cash) range rover spot but be cuz am lookin for a love solid as a rock. .the gr8 ting is that yor eyes look like a shootin star travelin from dubai to singapore but then yor voice sound like the new shape voxwagen so the question is..how much dowry wud u require for yor hand in marraige?

You are one smart guy (troll )
Your posts usually make me laugh.

Now that I already know you have a £28,000 Range Rover Sport, how will you know my love is genuine? That's to say, if you love a rich guy, how do you make him know that you actually love him and not his money?

Oyind17:
I am only talking to u here, if u see me in person that your small peniss go shrink

vizkiz:
defend myself? I don't give a damn about defence bae. I am too busy today. But those that knows me know I am real and I don't give a damn about nobody's crap

Don't mind the op...I think he's seeking attention. He was asked for proof, but he couldn't produce any.
He has leant his lesson from your army...Bros I hail you o! The way people defended you eeh, I was impressed.

My verdict: Op is a first class mumu

vizkiz:
holy Mary mother of crap!!!!!!

what the hell?

Finally you are here....oya defend yourself ...they said you were defending yourself with your alternate moniker(s)
Truth is I got really entertained