₦airaland Forum

derecho:
Sis,you aren't totally wrong as a rape victim may decide to forgive. Of course you know that's not easy except a transformation occurs within.The same person who in her interview said she's always been a bold child just cowered by just a push,no resistance and was even willing to drink Krest..abeg what kind of rape is that?Or is rape just because she wasn't willing to lose her virginity at that time?Think about it this way,if it had been a random guy with BF body frame that wants to rape her in her house,would she just lay there because he said:just do what I say and you'll be fine

landon:
nonsense. she got married in global impact church and definitely not joined by pastor biodun.

nosiebaba:
So there are no medical doctors or ob/gyns on nairaland? Tbh if you don't have any reasonable contribution on some matters kindly keep quiet.

nosiebaba:
this is a stupid answer. Nairaland is a forum where different people who have had such experiences might have one or two things to say based on their experience. How dare you display such insensitivity with your comments on such a delicate issue

teepain:
Well, if you admitted that he had sex with all 30 of them you can't say he didn't commit rape because in Bisola's case she was 17 hence she was below age of consent (18). As the law stands, anyone who sleeps with anybody below 18 is committing statutory RAPE.

I think that Nigerians have a very limited understanding of what constitutes rape and that is because the law enforcers and our courts are not treating this scourge with the attention it deserves.

lexy2014:
[s] It doesn't matter how many fvcks u give, but u just keep coming back 4 more of my comments. It might therapeutic 4u considering ur emotional issues. My "long boring epistles" has kept ur attention on nairaland since yday. Even though u ran of words& ideas, u still looking 4a way to stay in touch. That's amazing 4 something u called "boring" except maybe d meaning of boring has changed[/s]

OfficialAPCNGR:
Shut up!! Biodun Fatoyinbo is innocent

SocialJustice:
Your ego is just hurt, you just realised from that ad how insignificant you're. Grow up and move on. You think you can just wake up and make people move like that? How are they even sure your story is real? Do you know how many people called Busola to verify from her before coming out to speak? There is a level you get to in life, you don't just react to anything you see online. It takes clout, people with 1k active followers with a strong network to do these things.

God has finally answered your prayer and a strong figure with clout has come out to set the fire, support the fire and stop crying of how people ignored you.

lexy2014:
I thought u said am not worth ur time? I must b doing something right that makes u keep coming back although u speak in d contrary. Just d way u woke up at 2:03am in d morning to respond to "long boring epistles". U are really enjoying my company & my "boring epistles".

MarieSucre:
In other words, let the immorality continue se?

Nigerian Christians can be disgusting at times sha.

oldtruth:
Because he is weakling like you. If care is not taking, this will be the end of COZA. Don't be a fool like him.

mine85:
Who knows, how many weeks should we wait before trying to conceive.

Moyoclinic, webmed online says, duration doesn't matter.. If u are healthy, go ahead to try conceive..

Doctors... Gynecologist...

lexy2014:
Once again, ur dictionary issues have betrayed u. U have replied all my comments which should b more than 15. how's that not worth ur time? u really good at contradicting urself

oldtruth:
That is the problem with you people that choose not to use their brain. Who told you COZA is not a business empire? Keep wallowing in foolishness. Churches are big time business and infact a multi million dollar business. I know your brain will be too low to understand. So, I beg we put a stop to this.

oldtruth:
A rational being don't jump on conclusion. Who told you he raped her? Were you there? Why didn't she tell one of the church elders or an authority in the Church? Why can't she confide in someone and mentioned the person name now instead of going on a social media for cheap attention? This is just blackmail and can only deceive the gullible.

Reference:
Whether guilty or innocent one simply cannot ignore the happenings and continue on a course of indifference. He owes God Almighty a duty not to bring His church into disrepute, owes his family and the body of Christ a sense of fidelity and he must seek to descalate the situation as quickly as possible.

Whether it is the meat or fish you placed on the fire, the first thing to be done is to put out the flame before deciding which.

lexy2014:
At all sweetheart. Its still a reflection of d same pot-calling-kettle-black syndrome I talked about. U just acting out who u are& its allowed

Reference:
Whether guilty or innocent one simply cannot ignore the happenings and continue on a course of indifference. He owes God Almighty a duty not to bring His church into disrepute, owes his family and the body of Christ a sense of fidelity amd he must seek to descalate the situation as quickly as possible.

Whether it is the meat or fish you placed on the fire, the first thing to be done is to put out the flame before deciding which.

oldtruth:
So, you believed Dakolo? And that makes you what?

oldtruth:
No wisdom whatsoever in that. This life comes with so many trials. Don't fall, don't look back. It is a code. if you show cowardice, that is the end.

Timi and his wife got married in that Church and if not that the Church forced them to marry, he will still be smarking her and she keeps on giving birth. My brother, don't allow emotional blackmail. Even if he is guilty will stepping down help him? The guy owns COZA, use your senses if not, little children who don't know how you surfer to get to where you are will throw you out. Wicked people out ther

oldtruth:
Everone has a past. Did he continue with the romp afterwards? See, don't allow your past to tie you down. Let your past stay where it is. Make corrections and move on. That is life. Also this might be usual gimmicks by stupid people to bring men down. Prophet TB Joshua was accused severally and he stood his ground. Guy some past don't need your attention. Move on! He is also a social media pastor and that is why the little pressure is making him to succumb. Real men won't even bulge

oldtruth:
Fatoyinbo na mumu... What is your own with the yeye accusation of donkey years. This is the handiwork of his detractors maybe most of his senior pastors who are envious of his achievement. Why stepping down? Why? Did they own your edifice? I trust Suleiman... Sue those idiots and force them to apologize I don't like all this social media pastors and warriors. Guy face reality and move on with your life. make she go kill herself

Frankzz300:
There is a reason d white man call sense common. Life is simple but d simplicity of life is complex for some people. How? Where? When? Doesn't matter? He without sin should cast d first stone... Hypocrites. Keep supporting some woman dat wonna tarnish one's career. Myb there were other men that raped d woman but because CoZA pastor is popular, she wonna tarnish his imagine. RUBBISH!!!

lexy2014:
Its only when a person that feels d way u do, that they can say d things u say. What u say to others is only a reflection of who u are or how u c urself. So if u use insults on others, then its obvious that u c urself that way. If u don't have a healthy & happy self image of urself, u definitely going to transmit it to others. And u haven't failed to do so. So like I said its just d classic pot-calling-kettle-black syndrome that u are displaying. I no u can't help it

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Resurgent2016:
Joblessness at its peak.

Protesting over something that is purely hear-say. Gandauje was caught on camera collecting bribes, you didnt come out to protest, unemployment is high, insecurity is rife, our education and health systems are in shambles, no protest. These are well known facts, instead you went to protest an unsubstantiated allegation and you are proud to mention this was how you spent your Sunday....

The police should have rounded up the protesters for constituting a nuisance to society

lexy2014:
Once again, d pot-calling-kettle-black syndrome in full display. Remember that whenever u point one finger at others, four are actually pointing back at u

FakeHamdan101:
These are obviously the jobless ones. protesting over something you are not sure of. What if he didn't do it. He should have his time in court & not this stupid protest. We have bigger issues plaguing this nation but no protest rather people are wasting their energy protesting about a story told that no one could verify

Antoeni:
I DONT KNOW THE #COZA HEAD PASTOR IN PERSON BUT THIS IS WHAT I HAVE TO SAY.

A Pastor who has a close relationship with you, who could invite you anywhere to meet him up and you will willingly meet him up because of the Father and daughter relationship both of you have created over time, suddenly wakes up early in the morning by 7AM as brilliant and smart as he looks, summoned courage left his family (Wife and Child) to visit your family house that early hour, not minding if anyone would be at home, you opened the door, he pushed you, pulled off his trousers and raped you, you didn't scream, no! You tried to scream but he covered your mouth in the parlor of your family house, overpowered you in your parents house, when he was done raping you he didn't rush out, he still went to the car and got a drink and gave to you comfortably not minding if anyone might come in to see the blood stains, And finally with the way she described her compound I wondered who opened the gate that early hours of the day.... Don't also forget that her sister was at home. Dumb storyline, from a dumb Author..... I don't support rape, but your story should be truthful enough to convince smart people.

Before I forget, with the way she described her family house, I believe her family is well to do to an extent an average family, and at 18 and as smart and outspoken as you said earlier on, why didn't you tell it to your parents immediately so they can take up the case immediately, why wait till now?

There are things you tell smart people and they would believe not this crab. Something might have transpired between you both which I don't know but not this story.

I've been seeing a lot of post from people concluding on this matter, think before you write

My advice to every young lady or young man out there, if you ever become a victim of rape which I pray you won't become speak out immediately..

I say no to Rape, but this story got few lapses me view tho

Why many rape victims don’t fight or yell

By James W. Hopper June 23, 2015

James W. Hopper, PhD, is an independent consultant and part-time instructor in psychology in the Department of Psychiaßtry of Harvard Medical School. He has conducted research on the neurobiology of trauma, and trains investigators, prosecutors, judges, and higher-education professionals on its implications. Here, he offers his explanation of why people don’t always respond to an attack the way others might expect:

In the midst of sexual assault, the brain’s fear circuitry dominates. The prefrontal cortex can be severely impaired, and all that’s left may be reflexes and habits.

In the Washington Post’s recent series on college sexual assault, many victims describe how they reacted – and did not react – while being assaulted.

Another article also published this month, in the Harvard Review of Psychiatry, shows that some responses have been programmed into human brains by evolution.

Bringing together the accounts of those who have been assaulted with the neurobiology of trauma can play an essential role in supporting healing and the pursuits of accountability and justice.

For example, freezing is a brain-based response to detecting danger, especially a predator’s attack. Think deer in the headlights.

As one woman told the Post, “I didn’t say no, but I didn’t really know what to do. I just kind of froze.”

Freezing occurs when the amygdala – a crucial structure in the brain’s fear circuitry – detects an attack and signals the brainstem to inhibit movement. It happens in a flash, automatically and beyond conscious control.

Simultaneously with the freeze response, the fear circuitry unleashes a surge of “stress chemicals” into the prefrontal cortex, the brain region that allows us to think rationally – to recall the bedroom door is open, or that people are in the dorm room next door, for example, and to make use of that information.

But the surge of chemicals rapidly impairs the prefrontal cortex. That’s because, despite our dominant role on the planet now, we evolved as prey, and when a lion or tiger is upon us, stopping to think is fatal.

Indeed, no one understands better than the military that intense fear impairs our prefrontal cortex and capacity for reason.

When bullets are flying and blood is flowing, you had better have some really effective habit learning to rely upon.

That’s why combat training is rigorous and repetitive – to burn in habits of effectively firing weapons, executing combat formations, etc.

Most victims will freeze, if only briefly. Some will fight back, effectively. Some will resist in habitual, passive ways. Some will suddenly give in and cry. Others will become paralyzed, become faint, pass out or dissociate.

Few who have experienced these responses realize that they are brain reactions to attack and terror.

They blame themselves for “failing” to resist. They feel ashamed. (Men especially may see themselves as cowards and feel like they’re not real men.) They may tell no one, even during an investigation. Sadly, many investigators and prosecutors still don’t know some or all of these brain-based responses.

None of these responses – in women or men – entails consent or cowardice.

None is evidence of resistance too insufficient to warrant our respect and compassion.

They are responses we should expect from brains dominated by the circuitry of fear (just as we should expect fragmented and incomplete memories).

May the day come when everyone who knows someone who has been sexually assaulted – which is all of us, whether we know that yet or not – understands these basic ways that our brains can react to such attacks and uses this knowledge to foster healing and justice.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/grade-point/wp/2015/06/23/why-many-rape-victims-dont-fight-or-yell/?utm_term=.88d44a8a3377

lexy2014:
"Continue ranting..The more you talk, the more you expose your stuvpidity..."

Once again, ur dictionary is failing u. Am not d one d one who ran out of ideas& then resorted 2 insults 2 express himself

U have a weird way of describing urself. U just try to make others feel they are like u.
Do u remember I told about ur pot-calling-kettle-black syndrome? Thats just what u have displayed again.

Why many rape victims don’t fight or yell

By James W. Hopper June 23, 2015

James W. Hopper, PhD, is an independent consultant and part-time instructor in psychology in the Department of Psychiatry of Harvard Medical School. He has conducted research on the neurobiology of trauma, and trains investigators, prosecutors, judges, and higher-education professionals on its implications. Here, he offers his explanation of why people don’t always respond to an attack the way others might expect:

In the midst of sexual assault, the brain’s fear circuitry dominates. The prefrontal cortex can be severely impaired, and all that’s left may be reflexes and habits.

In the Washington Post’s recent series on college sexual assault, many victims describe how they reacted – and did not react – while being assaulted.

Another article also published this month, in the Harvard Review of Psychiatry, shows that some responses have been programmed into human brains by evolution.

Bringing together the accounts of those who have been assaulted with the neurobiology of trauma can play an essential role in supporting healing and the pursuits of accountability and justice.

For example, freezing is a brain-based response to detecting danger, especially a predator’s attack. Think deer in the headlights.

As one woman told the Post, “I didn’t say no, but I didn’t really know what to do. I just kind of froze.”

Freezing occurs when the amygdala – a crucial structure in the brain’s fear circuitry – detects an attack and signals the brainstem to inhibit movement. It happens in a flash, automatically and beyond conscious control.

Simultaneously with the freeze response, the fear circuitry unleashes a surge of “stress chemicals” into the prefrontal cortex, the brain region that allows us to think rationally – to recall the bedroom door is open, or that people are in the dorm room next door, for example, and to make use of that information.

But the surge of chemicals rapidly impairs the prefrontal cortex. That’s because, despite our dominant role on the planet now, we evolved as prey, and when a lion or tiger is upon us, stopping to think is fatal.

Indeed, no one understands better than the military that intense fear impairs our prefrontal cortex and capacity for reason.

When bullets are flying and blood is flowing, you had better have some really effective habit learning to rely upon.

That’s why combat training is rigorous and repetitive – to burn in habits of effectively firing weapons, executing combat formations, etc.

Most victims will freeze, if only briefly. Some will fight back, effectively. Some will resist in habitual, passive ways. Some will suddenly give in and cry. Others will become paralyzed, become faint, pass out or dissociate.

Few who have experienced these responses realize that they are brain reactions to attack and terror.

They blame themselves for “failing” to resist. They feel ashamed. (Men especially may see themselves as cowards and feel like they’re not real men.) They may tell no one, even during an investigation. Sadly, many investigators and prosecutors still don’t know some or all of these brain-based responses.

None of these responses – in women or men – entails consent or cowardice.

None is evidence of resistance too insufficient to warrant our respect and compassion.

They are responses we should expect from brains dominated by the circuitry of fear (just as we should expect fragmented and incomplete memories).

May the day come when everyone who knows someone who has been sexually assaulted – which is all of us, whether we know that yet or not – understands these basic ways that our brains can react to such attacks and uses this knowledge to foster healing and justice.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/grade-point/wp/2015/06/23/why-many-rape-victims-dont-fight-or-yell/?utm_term=.88d44a8a3377

lexy2014:
Oh dear. U have run out of words. Even with ur pictures, u still keep showing us that u still trying to cope with ur emotions. Yet its still difficult to find a place with ur words in d topic of discussion. Which still leads us back 2d issue of ur dictionary. U just can't help but show that u aren't in tune with words& their meanings

Continue ranting..The more you talk, the more you expose your stuvpidity...