Liljboy's Posts
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 Romance › Re: Girls And Car Keys by liljboy(op): 12:15am On Apr 16, 2013 |
Dygeasy: Wtf! Like seriously dude? What happened?if everybody posting here got a job, nobody would be here posting or criticising, dont u see slowpoke? 1 Like |
| Romance › Re: Girls And Car Keys by liljboy(op): 12:13am On Apr 16, 2013 |
Mr..Cork:if both of us had one, we wont be here holding each other's throat. Dont u think so foOL  1 Like |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Mr. Akpors by liljboy(op): 10:33pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
mumu get levels o lwkmd .. Ekaitte went to an electronic shop with anger and threw her new laptop on the desk of Mr Akpors from whom she bought it. She told Akpors, "You have... cheated me. I cannot transfer file from my previous laptop.." Akpors: Madam, can you please calm down and try it in my presence. This is what Ekaitte did, . 1) Right clicked the mouse on the file which she wanted to transfer and selected CUT option. . 2) Disconnected the mouse from that system. . 3) Took that mouse carefully and connected it to another system where she wanted to copy that file. . 4) Right clicked the mouse and selected the PASTE option. Akpors FAINTED!! |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Mr. Akpors by liljboy(op): 10:15pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
Akpors was having sex with his mistress at her house,when suddenly thieves broke in and he went out of the house running as fast as he could to his house. When he arrived, his wife asked, "why are you naked?" ..He replied,"well, i was attacked by thieves on my way home, they took everything from me". Wife: So why is a condom on your penis?... Akpors...well, as a grown up man, i couldn't run home completely naked. Lmao lwkmdhO |
| Romance › Re: Top 10 Compliments That Make Him Feel Specia by liljboy(m): 10:05pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
ovalrose: @ liljboy,if i call you oga the way i call him,wallai your wallet and ATM card with pin go fly reach me before you finish saying 'Yes,hon...'choi!! You should be kept on "dating-quarantine" |
| Romance › Girls And Car Keys by liljboy(op): 8:52pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
Girls girls girls.. . . I don't know whats wrong with gals o.. see, I have been asking some girls out in my street but they refused, they said they see me as a friend bla bla bla. for 2months now I never see gal friend and I never knack woman o. Okay, just yesternite my uncle came to our house to greet my paale. there was no drink at home so i decided to go buy some beer with my uncle's car. As I reached the bar, oh boy see as all those gals dey look me like fish, like they have won visa lottery, some were biting their lips as in trying to seduce me o because I was holding a car key. Even those gals that said they see me as a friend o........... oh boy, see as all of them just dey shine their brown teeth. If not that i was sent to buy something I for sample some nipples I swear. But ladies, why do some of you go nut when you see a guy with car key? just a question o 1 Like |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Brain Teasers by liljboy(op): 8:50pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
vb0mb: Arrant nonsensequite the same with your post. Asshole |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Silly Questions People Ask by liljboy(op): 7:12pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
ovalrose: God,i love this thread!i hope you love the OP too? |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Silly Questions People Ask by liljboy(op): 7:11pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
Person go see you dressed with travelling bag, and will still ask "na travel things?" no! I won go trowey my cloths |
| Jokes Etc › Brain Teasers by liljboy(op): 7:03pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
95.0% will not get this!!!!! . . . . Tom Took The Two Ties To Tie The Two Tall Trees. How many T's are in THAT ?? |
| Jokes Etc › Comparing Football Clubs To Students by liljboy(op): 4:10pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
1. LIVERPOOL is a child who is very proud of the academic achievements of his grandfather. 2. MANCHESTER UNITED is a boy who just performs in the final exams and tops the class. 3. MANCHESTER CITY is a spoiled child who spends money on expensive books but is never interested in reading them. 4. ARSENAL is a boy who used to be top of the class but dropped down because he had to sell his books due to financial problems. He tries hard but fails to come out on top. 5. TOTTENHAM HOTSPUR is a girl who gets decent marks on 1 specific subject. She always finishes behind Arsenal. 6. CHELSEA is a boy who fails and blames his teachers then his family finds a new teacher for him every year. 7. FC BARCELONA is that student that's a genius, that his father is bill gate, Buys everything needed for the student's well being. And he makes it at the top of his class every year. up BarCA 1 Like |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Mr. Akpors by liljboy(op): 3:01pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
Akpors to Ekaitte : I can make u say 'I LOVE U'. Ekaitte : No wayyy!! Akpors : Bet ? Ekaitte : Yes. Akpors : Ok start.... Say blue ? Ekaitte : Blue. Akpors : Say pink ? Ekaitte : Pink. Akpors : Say love ? Ekaitte : Love. Akpors : What's 1 1 ? Ekaitte : 2 Akpors : Ur age ? Ekaitte : 22 Akpors : Hahahaha.... I told u I could make u say 22!! Ekaitte : No, u said u could make me say 'I LOVE U' Akpors : Yes yes.. I just did. |
| Romance › Re: Top 10 Compliments That Make Him Feel Specia by liljboy(m): 1:46pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
ovalrose: I agree with numbers 4 and 5,especially. I simply call my man Oga and can almost see him swell with pride and whenever i need a favor from him i start with a sweet No. 5. Works like magic!if na me, anytime u call me that sweet name, i go grab my wallet tight joor. Lol |
| Romance › Re: Top 10 Compliments That Make Him Feel Specia by liljboy(m): 1:44pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
Saecula: Ingrates shouting rubbish. Can any of you say how it is rubbish?some people can be very stupid, they cant even create a topic, still they go around spoiling other people's thread. (if u aint like a post why not shut the Bleep up? They are lots of topics in here, why not move on? @poster u rock joor |
| Romance › Re: WHAT Do You Do When You Are Hurt?!!! by liljboy(m): 1:35pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
I play my wayne songs |
| Romance › Re: The Touch Of A Man Makes Women Hot! by liljboy(m): 1:32pm On Apr 15, 2013 |
Richfella: Nope, means they love being touched.but them go still dey form say nothing dey. Like say la us the tin dey sweet pass |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Mr. Akpors by liljboy(op): 9:01am On Apr 15, 2013 |
Akpos came back from Church and lifted up his wife, his wife was surprised and she said,"Baby, you have not done this to me before," and akpos said, "Our pastor said when we get home, we should lift our problem's to God." |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Mr. Akpors by liljboy(op): 7:10am On Apr 15, 2013 |
During a Biology class, the teacher asked the class, "Why is it that during childhood girls tend to grow taller than guys?" Akpors raised his hand and replied, "That's because guys have balls and that weighs them down." The teacher, a bit annoyed, responded, "Then why is it that at maturity guys tend to grow taller than girls?" Akpors countered by saying, "That's because girls get breasts and they are heavier than the guy's balls." |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Mr. Akpors by liljboy(op): 7:48pm On Apr 14, 2013 |
Akpos came first in his class and his class teacher gave him a gift sayin "well done akpos, i hope u will do d same next time. Akpos smiled and said" tank u sir, i hope u will come again to print d question papers at my uncles printing press next time. |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Mr. Akpors by liljboy(op): 5:12pm On Apr 14, 2013 |
Little Akpors returns from school and says he got an "F" in mathematics. Why? asks the father. Akpors: The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3?' and I said '6' Father: But that's right! Akpors: Then she asked me 'How much is 3x2?' Father: What's the fucking difference? Akpors: That's exactly what I said! |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Silly Questions People Ask by liljboy(op): 1:22pm On Apr 14, 2013 |
Someone will see you crying and will ask "are you crying?". . NO! MY EYE DEY PUMP WATER 2 Likes |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Mr. Akpors by liljboy(op): 11:05pm On Apr 13, 2013 |
On a very cool evening, Mr. Akpos was with his family, all watching TV when his youngest son, 'Joshua' interrupts with a question. Joshua: Dad(Akpos), whats the difference between 'potential' and ' reality'? Akpos (turns to wife): would u sleep with George.W. Bush for $1 million? Wife: Of course, I will never waste that opportunity. Akpos (turns to daughter): Would u sleep with Brad Pitt for $1 million? Daughter: Yes! He is my fantasy. Akpos (turns to eldest son): Would u sleep with Tom Cruise for $1 million? Eldest son: Why not? Imagine what I would do with that money. Akpos turns to his youngest son Joshua: U see son, 'potentially' we are sitting with multimillionaires BUT in 'reality' we are sitting with two prostitutes and one Gay, idiot!! 2 Likes |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Mr. Akpors by liljboy(op): 10:41pm On Apr 13, 2013 |
foolish couple . After a meeting mrs. Akpors was coming out of a hotel n started looking for her car keys. They were not in her pockets. A quick search in the meeting room... it wasnt there. Suddenly she realized she must have left them in the car. Mr. Akpors has shouted many times bout leaving the keys in the ignition. Mrs. Akpors theory is, the ignition is the best place not to lose them. Mr akpors theory is that the car will be stolen. Immediately she rushed 2d parking lot, she came to a terrifying conclusion. His theory was right. The parking lot was empty. She immediately called the police, gave them d location, car number and description of the place where she parked etc. She equally confessed that she had left my keys in the car, and that it had been stolen. Then she made the most difficult call of all, 2 her husband!!! "Honey," she stammered; she always call him "honey" in times like these."I left my keys in the car, and it has been stolen.", but then she heard his voice. "Idiot", he shouted, "I dropped you at the hotel !" Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, "Well, come and get me." akpors shouted again, "I will, as soon as I manage to convince this policeman that I have not stolen your car."!!! |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Silly Questions People Ask by liljboy(op): 10:32pm On Apr 13, 2013 |
Mr. OON:no! they are scoring for norwich 3 Likes |
| Rap Battles › Re: Flow For Rank by liljboy(m): 10:31pm On Apr 13, 2013 |
Good trip to india then. |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Mr. Akpors by liljboy(op): 8:21pm On Apr 13, 2013 |
Papa: Papa Emeka is coming to collect d money i owed him. When he comes, tell him i have traveled. U hear?? Akpos: yes Papa. Papa Emeka entered: Akpos where is ur father?? Akpos: he has travelled. Papa Emeka: when is he coming bak? Akpors: wait, let me go and ask him? (Akpos went inside, open d bak of d door and said): Papa, papa Emeka said when are u coming bak?? Papa: tell him next week. Akpos ran bak and said: Papa Emeka, my dady said i should tell u dat he wil be bak next week. Papa Emeka: ok, go and tell him dat if he comes bak next week, he should let me know. The Question is: WHO IS MORE FOOLISH ? 1 Like |
| Rap Battles › Re: Flow For Rank by liljboy(m): 8:15pm On Apr 13, 2013 |
La just this one you see they complain? That guy is good, nothing like long updates mikuz: Sarosh . . . !! My only wahala with him is that his lines are always too long! |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Silly Questions People Ask by liljboy(op): 8:12pm On Apr 13, 2013 |
You are cooking and someone sees and ask: are you cooking? . No! Am preparing herbal drugs |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Silly Questions People Ask by liljboy(op): 8:10pm On Apr 13, 2013 |
Add your own experience. |
| Jokes Etc › Silly Questions People Ask by liljboy(op): 8:09pm On Apr 13, 2013*. Modified: 1:58pm On May 22, 2013 |
[b]silly QUESTIONS PEOPLE ASK! 1. Someone call u at 2am & asks "Are u sleeping?. Ans: No i'm picking beans. 2. When its raining & someone noticed you're going out yet he'll ask, "Are u going out in this rain?. Ans: No! In d next one. 3.Someone saw u coming out of d bathroom wet, yet will ask, "Did u just have ur bath?. Ans: No, i fell into d toilet bowl. 4. You're standing in front of d elevator on d ground to ur office, yet they'll ask,"Are u going up?. Ans: No, i'm waiting 4 my office 2 come down and get me. 5. Ur boyfriend comes home wit a bunch of flowers, and u still ask, "Are those flowers?" Ans: No baby, they are carrots!. 6. You're in d toilet and u lock d door and someone knocks, asking, "Is anyone in there?" Ans: No! Na poo lock goor...Mtcheew! !!. 7. You're in a queue at d cinema 2 buy a ticket, a friend saw you & asked, "What are u doing here?. Ans: I'm waiting to pay my school fees..." 8. When they see u lying down wit ur eyes closed,they'll ask, "Are u sleeping already?. Ans: No, I'm training to die..." MUMU!!!. 9. When they overheard your conversation on phone, "Ok daddy,yes daddy, bye daddy", they'll. Still ask "Is that your daddy." Ans: No, na baba God. 10. If them see u wit football boot dem go ask u,"You wan go play ball ne?" Ans: No, i wan go studio". Olodo. 11. If dem see accident 4 road, dem go still ask,"Na accident be dis. Ans: No, na film trick. silly questions need stupid answers. [/b] 2 Likes |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Mr. Akpors by liljboy(op): 8:01pm On Apr 13, 2013 |
.One day Akpos called his home. The servant picked up the phone. Akpos: where is my wife? Servant: she is with her husband. Akpos: fool, I'm her husband! Servant: sorry sir, i didn't recognize you, then who is the other man in bedroom with her? Akpos: how will i know? Listen,do me a favor. Kill the man and my traitor wife.... The faithful servant followed his orders and called back. Servant: sir, i killed them. What shall i do with their bodies? Akpos: drown them in the river behind our building. Servant: but we don't have any river behind our house..... Akpos replied: Is this house No 6725 Servant: No sir, its 6752. Akpos: Sorry, wrong Number *hangs phone* |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Mr. Akpors by liljboy(op): 7:59pm On Apr 13, 2013 |
Akpors was on his way back home early one morning when he came across robbers. They got hold of him. He struggled and struggled but they over powered him. When they searched him and found only #200 on him, the following dialouge ensured. ROBBERS: Is this the # 200 you were struggling to keep AKPORS: No, I thought you were going 2 take the #5,000 in my shoe. The robbers beat him up and quickly made away with the #5,000... 1 Like |
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