₦airaland Forum

Wot are they doing in malaysia.we need to understand that there are some countries where we are not needed as Nigerians..May His Gentle soul Rest in Peace..!

Dbanj has notthing to do with this jor...I was at the shop around early last year,it belongs to one fat guy that is jst using the name has a biz strategy..He is @ jakande plank market and not ikotun...!

I don't know why any sane being would be trying to justify the rash deecisions of a very controversial president who decides to pardon a governor that single handedly wrecked a state leaving millions to wallow and die in poverty.What kind of message do you think he would be sending to the average citizen when we all know that Nigerias present deplorable state has been caused majorly by corruption and theft.
Op you really don't seem to understand the implication of the actions of corrupt officials on the people probably because it is not as direct as thatt of a robber who forcefully deprives you of your valuables at gunpoint,am very sure if you personally catch such a person afterwards you wld not only see that your valuables are recovered but also that he should be locked up for as long as possible that's if are don't put a tyre round is neck anyway..So if corrupt public servants that siphon funds meant for medical facilitties,Road Repairs,Provision of Basic ammenitties,Education,Electicity etc and make people suffer and die ealier than they would normally can be pardoned then it would only be logical to paardon evry harmed robber,convicted Killers,Villains that are locked up in same vein.cause they all fall under same category..The presidential pardon on Alam is a slap on our face and his an unwelcome development....

Guy it seems u really love this gal ooh but unfortunately for you she knowss it but she doesn't love you in return..she wldnt want to let you go cos she has obviously seen that you have money(in short you are her personal mugu)...
But things havn gotten so bad yet..don't giv herr d fone back and don't buy any bold 5..Try and look forr other gals that can genuinly keep your comppany, do things that wld get your attention aaway frrm thinking about her..Don't even caall her again forget about her cos she wld only rip u off more..it may not be easy but people have survived worse..see your investment time,money,efffort on her as a awaste.

Omo that groom go don fast tire see as him slim him head self slim..!Anyway HML..Wishn them the best..!

Goallllll...this browser too slow...

Did anyone watch chile vs peru earlier ....mehn that was one watchable and enjoyable match...this one jst irritates me..no convincing chance was created by the eagles they tried to many aerial chances against obviously taller kenyans...!

10. BUS CONDUCTORS
https://farm3.staticflickr.com/2378/2364440654_8e2d072199_z.jpg?zz=1
There’s the long working hours. There’s the life threatening occupation of hanging half-outside a speeding bus while keeping an eye out for passengers. There’s the smoke and the people you have to deal with everyday.

But the worst -ultimate worst- part of being a bus conductor is having to shout out the unpronounceable names of bus stop names while mentally calculating how much change you owe the guy in the distracting pink shirt. It easily combines our two worst activities: Shouting unpronounceable bus stop names and mathematics.

That’s why they sweat so much. You would to, if your entire day consisted of shouting such destinations as:

SABOYABACOSTAINPANGORIGO.

or

OSHODIOSHODIOSHODIOSH

or

OJUELEBGBAONIPANPANGROOO.


9. NEPA POLE GUY
https://miabaga.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/Nepa-at-Work.jpg

First of all, working for NEPA is already considered not cool by the general populace. There was this guy in Secondary school whose dad worked for The Authorities, and every time the lights went off, we’d all look at him and shake our heads.

So not only is working for NEPA not cool, but being the Pole Guy who has to go around cutting people’s power lines just has to suck in the worst way. You’re like the bad news guy the Army sends to tell families they’ve lost someone in battle. Only imaging if it’s an army that’s already generally hated by the populace.

It’s up to you to ride in that van with the ladder, get to someone’s house, climb up the pole, disconnect the power, look down, see the crowd of angry faces waiting for you at the bottom, and decide whether descending the ladder is the best option for your general health and longevity.



8. LASTMA OFFICIAL
https://miabaga.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/lastma-official.jpg

Everybody’ in Lagos knows who the LASTMA are. Nobody likes them. There job description consists mostly of stopping you when you desperately need to be somewhere important and having the most dull drawn out conversations. You’ll never hear a conversation like: “Oh, there are the LASTMA. Let’s go hang out with them.”

Or “Hey, let’s get them some drinks shall we?”

Never.

You just know you’re in the wrong line of work if the mere sight of you causes 20,000 people to start saying mean things about your uncle’s father’s friend in the village whom they’ve never even met before.



7. BANKER
https://serving.thisdaylive.com/0bef99d6-acf5-4e2c-9779-8fa02ba3fcd4/assets/290311Tsanusi-lamido-sanusi.jpg?maxwidth=400&maxheight=540

To everybody who wants to be a banker: Undeceive yourselves. Do yourselves a favor and change your future ambitions as soon as possible. It is a trap. Banking jobs are sort of like babies. You see them all cute and cuddly and you’re like, “Awww, I’d really like to have one of my own.”. Then you decide to have one of you’re own and one day you’re up by 3 a.m changing diapers and you realize that somebody, somewhere, engaged in a bit of false advertising.

Bankers have it the worst. Their working hours are horrible. The Tellers sit behind counters all day counting money an dealing with the most obnoxious customers (to be honest, we ourselves have been the obnoxious customer many a time). Then you stay back after work closes and balance accounts. And if you make some small computing error, you can’t leave until you sort that out. And then they’re targets and goals and deadlines and stuff and about 100 million fresh eager graduates out of school just waiting to take your job.

Next time you go into a bank, show a little compassion will you? Those people have it hard. There was this guy behind the counter where I formerly used to bank, and every time I went there, his face was a cry for help. It was like dud, get me out of here.

You do not want to be a banker. Especially not in Lagos. Trust me.


6. INTERNET CAFE OWNER
https://news.bbc.co.uk/olmedia/1940000/images/_1944801_cafe300.jpg

Remember 2001? Internet Cafe Owners had it good that year, didn’t they? Nobody understood what the internet was really about and we were all easy prey. We’d spend 1 hour waiting for an available system, hoping the guy with 12 minutes remaining wasn’t going to purchase more time. Then you’d pay some ridiculous amount for your one hour ticket. You’d sit there in front of your system for 30 minutes waiting for Yahoo Messenger to finish loading. And at the end of it, you’d look at the owner and say Thank You Sir, For Letting Me Use Your Internet Facilities.

Now if you’re an internet cafe owner, it may be beginning to dawn on you that maybe, just maybe, you’re in the wrong line of business. Maybe it’s those empty seats. Maybe it’s the drastic reduction in cashflow. Maybe it’s just how people don’t really need you anymore. Maybe it’s how people don’t even bother to accuse you of harboring Yahoo guys.

Everybody’s got a laptop now. And those who don’t have smart phones. And guess what, they can access the internet too.

Internet cafes have gone from this: https://miabaga.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/InternetSurfersCyberCafeNairobiKenya.jpg

To this: https://miabaga.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/e01a3_110929111810-internet-cafe-story-top.jpg


To this:https://miabaga.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/yahoo.jpeg

If you know any internet cafe owners, give them a hug.


5. PLUMBER
https://miabaga.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/tumblr_lyyy6muZad1romss3o1_500.jpg

Quite possibly, and this is just an assumption made after a few months of casual observation, Lagos has the worst drainage system in the world. There are literally hundreds of thousands of houses in Lagos. This translates to millions of toilets flushing at any point on time.

We don’t want to dwell on this too much, but imagine for a moment the nasty surprises that await the Plumber. Imaging the sort of surprises that get mixed up in the convoluted network that runs beneath the city.

You’d turn up to fix a blocked pipe in Festac, and before you know it, you’re unclogging bottles from Alausa, pure water packs from Fadeyi and perhaps a Yatch or two from Ikoyi.


4. GATEMAN
https://miabaga.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/628x471.jpg

There’s nothing wrong about holding doors open for people. Gates on the other hand, are a problem.

It would drive me crazy, repeating that simple process of walking to a car, looking at the occupants as if they were all under suspicion, walking to the gate, dragging it open, dragging it shut, and then waiting for when the people who just drove in minutes ago, want to leave. Then the other 90% of the time, you’re sitting out there in the sun doing absolutely nothing.


3. CHAUFFEUR
https://miabaga.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/WYWS-515x335.jpg

People always complain about the Lagos traffic. The only people who don’t are Drivers. Why? They’ve seen it all. All sorts of traffic. The short ones. The long ones. The ones that end at the next red Light, and the ones that end in another state. They’ve spent hours on 3rd Mainland enjoying the view. They’ve understood the inner workings of that Iyana Ipaja. They have a fond relationship with Ibadan Expressway.

I’m not talking about cab drivers, who spend a lot of time coasting around eyeballing pedestrians and dreaming up impossible price fares. I don’t think anyone who hasn’t been a driver can adequately appreciate how much misery the job must entail.


2. NSCDC LAGOS COMMANDANT
https://fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/188969_10151396715993409_1191923061_n.jpg

Man. This is a major contender for the worst job in Lagos. You know Mr Shem of course. And if you don’t you need to watch this.

Let’s just put it this way, there’s no man in town who is the brunt of as many jokes as this poor fellow.

First came the memes

And merchandise.

And a remix.

And a skank


1. GOVERNOR- LAGOS STATE
https://miabaga.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/Gov-Babatunde-Fashola1.jpg

There are about 21 million people crammed into this tiny state. And every morning, every one of these people is looking up to this guy to somehow keep them safe and magically better their lives.

And if you’re the governor, while you’re doing this you have to keep an eye out for political enemies who are trying to make you look bad and summarily lose your job.

Then figure out how to deal with pollution.

And over population.

And crime.

And bad roads.

And Commandants who don’t know their organisation’s website addresses.

And 21 million of us.

Worst. Job. Ever.


http://miabaga.com/p/top-ten-worst-jobs-to-have-in-lagos/

Na wah ooh. So if angel won appear self he no see vatican go na florida wey all d women dey walk naked sey dem they wear bikini na him He go take showww face..I laff in Ekiti-pupa..!

GTB is a good place to work but your firsst promotion wld come after 3years which is standard practice..There is so much work in that bank u might not have time for yourself.The crowd @ d banking halls speak for themselves..It is very good for your CV they have great wwork ethics and corprate governance.
Diamond just reviewed their salaary and now pay higher than Gt..it is not as stressfull as GTB and is a very stable bank..dunno much abt them...,

I don't understand what the parents are trying to achieve....!

This mechanics sha...I asked them to help me check something in the engine and they have already posted the pic....

I met a very pretty gal wit @ bank was already too deep in d conversation before I noticed the horrible odour I perceived was from her mouth.Not yet conviced we fixed a date and I reluctantly went..but I as we talked I kkept dodging her mouth cos it smelt like she had eaten dead rat..I culdnt take it anymore so I had to tell her but I was very wise abt it.
I took her for a walk tto the supermarket, and I told her I didn't like d brush I was using cos it doesn't wash well I also complained that I needed a new toothpaste cos d one I use doesn't give me d lasting fresheness I need..so I threw d ball @ her court asking her the toothpaste she was using and told her some were better I got her a mouthwash and toothpaste we went on I asked if she had ever seen d dentist..I help her get rid of it..even though we ar not togeda anymore

There has been no improvement in power supply yet Phcn has started bringing outreageous bills, I live in aa five bedroom winged duplex in lagoss and our monthly phcn bill used to be 4000N last year it was increased to 7000N per month now PHCN brings a bill of about N12,000 per month and we hardly have light for barely 10hrs a day....How has light been in your area and how much is your PHCN bill..compared to the former rate u were charged...!

There is only one way to find out..see question ooh

Put picture nah

170million ke...! Hw come and I never even start to dey born

Sorry to Hear your story bro,but God is your strenght,Keep believing and keep praying, He would surely remember You and your breakkthrough would ccome.Just keep appllying.

I almost had a similar problem while I was in Year 1 2nd semester also had a part scholarship in the Uk and I thought I was alreaady there, I stopped going to skool for lectures but something just told me to write the exams for writing sake..immediatly aafter the exams i was denied visa twice and had to go back to skool..I had 3F and 3Es my Gp dropped to 3rd class..But with God I still finished wit a 2.1..But I want u to know that its not the end of the road..God would suprise you and people would wonder..Just pray hard and make sure u prepare for opportunities

The Danfo drivers are very unreliable,and they drive recklessly too..You might end up spending more money aafter buying the danfo for their usage..because Today the bus wwld be in police station,tommorrow they would call you that they have hit somone,tommorrow engine oveheat...Those Bus drivers are terrible people..Wouldn't advice you venture into it except you ar going to drive the Bus yourself...!

Leading international soccer player Kevin-Prince Boateng, who plays for one of Europe's top clubs, insists he will walk off in a competitive game if he is subjected to further racist abuse.

European football's reputation has been tarnished by the scourge of racism this season but on Thursday matters came to head when AC Milan star Boateng kicked the ball into the stand and walked off after a group of fans had directed monkey chants at the Ghanian international and three of his teammates during a friendly match in northern Italy.

"I don't care what game it is -- a friendly, Italian league or Champions League match -- I would walk off again," the German-born Boateng told CNN in an exclusive interview on Friday.

The 25-year-old ripped off his shirt in disgust during the first half of Thursday's friendly against lower league Italian side Pro Patria, before being joined by his teammates and opposition players in walking off the pitch.

"I'm sad and angry that I'm the one that has to take action," added the AC Milan midfielder, who has also played in the German and English Premier Leagues during his career.

"All the people who support me would support me in a big game. Players like Rio Ferdinand and Patrick Vieira have supported me and I just want to say thank you."

Milan, who have won the Italian title 18 times and the European Cup (now known as the Champions League) seven times, were using the friendly to prepare their side for the resumption of the league -- Serie A -- season after a brief winter break.

During the friendly match, the AC Milan midfielder had told the referee three times he was being abused.

"If it happens again I'm not going to play anymore," said Boateng, who was born in Berlin. "The referee said: 'Don't worry' but I said I do worry, it's not very nice.

"I was angry and I was sad, but it all came together and I said I don't want to play anymore. There were so many negative emotions that came up with me.

Welcome to 2013,It has been argued that how you start a year is very important to you and that it determines how you might spend the remainder of the year..!
Dunno how trues this is...What is the significance of the first day of the year...!

Kindly share your experiences,on first of last year i spent most of the day in church, and I noticed that tthrough out the year I was usually in chuurcch when I wasn't at work..!Two years ago on the first I was to go on date wit a chick only for her to tell me she won't make it in the last minute.after I paid ffor our reservations.that year eeehn..Gals chop my money die..dunno if it applies to you too..Let's share..!!!

claremont: I wonder if these crazed killers get some form of penile erec-tion from attacking defenceless children. It is only a crazed human beng that would attack an innocent child.

BTW, all those people blaming gun proliferation for the attack in America can as well campaign against knife proliferation in this current attack. Some people need to learn that a gun or a knife doesn't just kill people by itself, it requires a crazed person behind it. It is people that kill people.

Oga did u read that no death was recorded @ all,u want to compare assault rifle with knife abi...!

I think the Nigerian govt shld jst hand off power production..Nigerians are tired of all this stories..!

Sick and tired of all this targets..Give us Light...!

I actually finished uni 3yrs ago but I got my Job after 9 months of searching since the Job I won't lie to you my life has changed for the better..- I really cant imaginee howw depressing it can be..cos u finisshed with a very good grade..I waant us to look at the problems from several angles cos wit ur Gp u shld av a good Jobb by now even by the nigerian unemployment standard...

1: How Often do youu get called for aptitude test when you apply? If companies hardly call you for test then that means there could be a problem with your CV and cover letter you could ask people around you for help or get a book that guides on writing CVs and attending interviews..

2: When you write tests how often do you pass: Most tests require speed and accuracy,if u av not been passing much then that means you havnt been preparing hard enough..u should read extensively brush up your vocabulary,study ur gmat even though u avnt been invited for any tests..u can't afford to miss any opportunity now..make sure u pass all the tests you write..Do your homework...!

3: prepare well for interviews,read about the company,get to know their vision,mission,core values,exude confidence,don't be jittery,dress well..u could also get books that wld aid ur interview preparation...

4: Talk to people, get refferals,let people know u ar still searching and that you need help,tell people in your church and in any gathering you find yourself,builld a network of referals,once u apply to a coy try to find a link to someone who can assit u in making sure u ar called for test,once u pass try to get an internal link in d coy make sure u get d interview..don't relent on personal effort and merit alone..u can never rule out connection(man know man) in naija..!

5: Pray..More than ever now is the time for you to be close to God,stay away from sin,worship God in true wholeheartedly..worship him not bbecos of wot u ar expecting from him but because He is your God,fast,do personal nite vigils,observe quite time,meditate on his word day and night..It would only be a matter of time before you would give your testimony..!

6: And please 3yrs no b joke..Find something else to do,learn something,tailoring,barbing,photography,learn a skill...who knows..Gods plan for you..Make the best use of your time..I wish u the best in your search..!

This bridge collapsed barely about 4yrs ago and it was repaired by some contractors..I remember while repairs were going on people had to cross the express and lives were lost.crossing students were hit by vehicles and the whole tthing wansntt pleasant..we can't really blame Nigerians..I always use the bridge cause I cantt risk crossing the express havving witnessed so many accidentts..let's just hope Fashola's govt wld do something b4 d bridge collapses..anytime I pass the bridge am sure my speed is alwayss faster than bolts sprint..cos its very scary when u see tthe express just underneath you...!

Guys please I also have a similar issue..I want to break up with my Gf but I don't know how to say it without hurting her..she really loves me and I love her too..but we keep quarreling this days.its not like am seeing someone else already..but I think my happiness and peace as a human is more important than any relationship,and I believe same should apply to her..so guys pls how do I tell her without hurting her feelings or looking like some user..cos we both planned to maake it work into marriage..but now we fight over any little issue...!

The christian life requires one to be holy all times in all of ones endeavours...but considering the form of temptation one is faced with this days..my question is...Is it really realistic that a man can lead a life free from sin in this our time...! I would giv examples
For example the Bible shuns any form of bribery aand even usury...u av to be slow to speak aand quick to listen..your utterances have to be holy and without lie and deceit..the kind of music you listen to has to be one that glorifies God at all times, alcoholism is ungodly,any form of fornication is an abomination,even self service is condemned,no form of inordinate affection is allowed btw u and your woman until you get married and we aaall know marriage is now for the rich,once you are saved it is your responsibility to win new souls or their blood would be in hands if they die unsaved while u culd av saved them..the list is endless...sometimes I feel a strong conviction for some of the things I do..but is it realistic in this time..I know it takes Grace...need honest openions..!

I really find it difficult to understand why our govt has not really done anything on this boko haram issue..everyday inncoent lives are being I lost.when christians want to win souls they go about preaching the gospel peacefully..They tell you to accept Jesus christ as your Lord and saviour,they ask you to confess your sins and forsake them, they encourage you to read the bible and lead a holy life...All this is done very peacefully without aany form of coercion...But now my dear Islamist choose to pick up cutlasses and guns to preach if you don't accept theirr doctrines then u ar not fitt to live...my question is wwhatt kind of religion supports taking another mans life because he chose not to believe...no religion eva supports violence..Are this boko haram really ffighting because of religion or something else..Do they plan to make their so called aljanah after taking so many innocent lives,why are they demanding for the suppresion of the religious rights of other people...can Nigeria continue to exist as one entity or is it better we split...am asking all this questions cos I stumbled on this pics and they are very disturrbing...it is well with our soul...http://www.anglicandioceseofjos.org/dogo.html

All this blood shed makes me ask is God stil with Nigeria...!cos we are supposed to be some of d most religious people in the world..who llove life...!

My dear your story iss so sad, u were young when u got into into all this..As for the young man I would advice you leave him and let him be..it would be painful at first someone you have been with for about five years but time heals wounds delete him aand wipe out all memories of him from your life..try to make new male friends but just friends for now..!
Nothing mite happen to the guy noww but trust me in d future he would get his own major dissapointment..wot goes around comes arouund...!
And aas for you, I think you need spiritual cleansing..go to church or mosque depending on ur religion go for deliverance.get closer to God break yourself from any evil convenant you made with him..try to go out more often with your girlfriends..with time you would see how God would reward you with someone better..!