₦airaland Forum

According to my dictionary a ruffian is described as a cruel and brutal fellow. You can imagine the word cruel or brutal. and when someone that's suppose to be a role model to others can come to the level of engaging someone in a public brawl or assaulting both guys and girls in public. is that person worthy of being refer to as a role model. to whom much is given, much is expected. most of our so called role models are bunch of cruel and brutal fellows when no one is watching. they insult, abuse and assault people at will, simply cos they tend to believe they are untouchable. most times, you hear stories of an actress or actor slapping someone or assaulting an innocent wanna-be actress on set. they go on doing things like this without being punished. cos they have foolish people in authority who are ready to protect or defend them any time, anyday. You can imagine a a popular video director engaging in a public brawl and stabbing an innocent young man on set. over what? what about the popular radio personality that batterd a junior colleague simply cos the guy was caught sleeping while on night duty. we've also heard cases of one actress or the other harrassing this or that girl or guy for taking pics of her or not showing much respect on set. you can imagine how our local champions tend to behave simply cos they are popular, over rated or have fans screaming their names. this harrassment have to stop. for crying out loud, they are role models and ought to conduct themselves well in public no matter what. I know we are all humans and could be provoked at any time. but to whom much is given, much is expected. imagine any of your fans, or those that look up to you seeing you conducting yourself so disgracefuuly in public either by engaging in a public brawl or sexually harrassing a lady, what kind of training or example are you passing on to them? that they can also do the same thing and get away with it. we are living in small world, my dear, my brother. and need to respect one another. you are up there, famous and rich, doesn't mean you can treat those beneath you anyhow.You are suppose to set good examples to others. And you should know that we are all humans and accountable to God. Lets love one another. cos love is what we need to heal the world.

@Mynd 44, I do enjoy reading your comments and contributions. do keep it up. cheers.

I recently watched an American documentary (anchored by top Hollywood actor/comedian Chris Rock) on weave on and the amount of money most ladies spend on their hair every week and the crave for weave-on among African-American ladies. Even some elderly women aren't left out in this craze for 'oyinbo' hair. Imagine an average american girl spending up to a thousand dollars ($1000) every week or twice in a month on weave-on, when she doesn't have enough food at home to feed her kids. and some of them even deposit money with hair dressers while trying to raise the complete amount ($1000) for a weave-on. You can imagine. and that's about #160,000 here. I thought it was only the girls here that were crazy about weave-on and buying of brazilian hair. I never knew the craze for weave-on is everywhere...and black men are not finding this funny at all.

When a girl/lady eventually says yes or succumb to the advances of a guy, she must have considered it very well and also thought of the benefits the relationship might bring for her. most times alot of issues influences a lady's decision to accept the proposition of a man. some are due to their age. since they're not getting any younger, age plays an important role whenever a lady is considering a guy/other men. especially if she has passed or within the age a lady is suppose to get married. Money also play a part too. some ladies tend to believe that once they start going out with a guy, all their needs and responsibilities (including that of their family members in some cases) would be taken care of by the guy. so, before saying yes, they tend to check out the guy, want to know where he's working, what's he doing, his family background or what kind of business he's into. and if the guy is on point in all or most of these areas, he stands a chance of winning the girl's heart. Mind you, you're not winning her heart cos she likes you. she's only giving you a chance or saying yes, cos she's done her background check on you and have agreed to date you cos she's seen that you're financially ok (Mr.Capable). cos no girl wants to date a broke man! And pressure atimes also influence a lady's decision. and pressure sometimes goes with age. it might be pressure from her family to settle down or pressure from friends to hook a guy (or when most of her friends are already married). this can make a girl give in to a guy, whom ordinarily she wont even be considering if not for one reason or the other. And also if she's just getting out of a relationship, and wants to start a new one immediately in order to get over her ex. some girls do this, especially if she was dumped for another girl by her ex. such an incidence can make a lady feel unloved or not good enough. making her feel inferior. so atimes, some of them do crave to meet and start a new relationship with another guy just to spite an ex and also prove to him that she's still an hot cake, wanted by others. she might not necessarily be into the new guy, but would be willing to go along, just to get over her past pain/heartbreak. and lastly (& which is becoming rare these days), love also plays a role. when a girl really likes a guy, she'd be willing to give in to him. but not without making him sweat a little. you know, playing hard to get at first. doing the catch me if you can, kind of game. before eventually succumbing to the chase or advances of the guy. most girls do this alot. but these days, love comes last whenever a girl is considering the proposition of any man. first and foremost, a man must be capable financially before he can be given any chance by a girl. if not, he's on his own. since love cant buy them a black berry porshe! Abi no be so? so, alot of things do come into play whenever a lady is considering a man and when she evetually says yes. and love is usually the last on the list!

No matter the amount of Love a girl has for a guy, not a few ladies would drop their boyfriend for any man that is willing and ready to marry them. to most ladies, getting married comes before Love. and they are ready to forfeit love to get married. Like the case of a lady who was dating a guy who wasn't that committed. she loved the guy so much and was hoping they would eventually get married. But as the months were gradually turning into years, and with the guy not showing any sign of doing the right thing, she became worried and was running out of patience. Along the line, she later met another guy, while still with her boyfriend. and when the new guy later asked her to marry him, she immediately dropped her boyfriend (together with the love she had for him), for the new guy whom she had only known for a few months. You can imagine, how girls treasure marriage above love. to some, na love dem go chop! Abeg comot for road for better person, is the slang of most girls nowadays aspa dating a serious guy with serious intentions...But guys una own sef too much. How una go date a girl for more than a year and yet will be reluctant to do the right thing. most times, its not even cos of lack of money to wed. some just prefer keeping girls as lovers. Called or kept for pleasure/fancy only. Forgetting that these girls are humans with set goals and who also have a biological clock that runs faster than Usain Bolt! Bros, make una dey try small. You wont be happy if your sister/female cousin or niece is being milked, used, delayed or dumped like that by a guy. Abi no be so?

This is when someone decide to 'bend' either to impress or satisfy the wishes of another person. especially in a relationship. Like when a guy because of his girlfriend decide to do this or that, or when a girl cos of a guy goes out of her way to satisfy or please him. like changing her way of dressing in order to suit the lifestyle of her boyfriend, change her religion or belief cos of a guy, steal or take from her family/friend and give to her guy or develop new/bad habits in order to fit in with her guy/his kind of friends. And a guy could also start working out in order to develop his biceps cos his girlfriend asked him to (especially girls that like macho guys). while a girl may decide to do some body enhancement (boob or nose job) cos her boyfriend suggested it/asked her to do it. it goes on and on. and there are people who are in such a relationship. they do crazy things cos of love or lust. most times, it's out of lust for the other person. and some are even systematically removed from their family or prevented from seeing their friends by their partners. Such love is bound to mar such a person's life or progress. Cos you are virtually living for the other person. No wonder such a person always feel he or she cant survive or live without the presence of the other person in his/her life. I call such love Crazy Stupid Love... if you cant love someone the way he or she is, then leave him/her in peace. you dont have to 'bend' to look or behave according to the way your boyfriend or girlfriend wants. You cant be a project to a guy or a girl and allow him/her do as they wish with you. You have your life to live. your dreams and how you do your things. If you're in a relationship and your partner is not influencing you positively, it's better you take a walk out of that relationship. When a relationship is all about sex, then its no more about love but lust. And you are bound to be lost when your relationship is all about lust. Love ought to be unconditional. You dont have to make someone into what you desire or want. Love them the way they are. and endeavour to be a positive influence to your partner...

We do have guys who have girls that are only good enough for flings and who they call upon whenever they want to keep their body/bed warm. but when it comes to being committed/serious with such a girl, they tend to drag their feet. Such girls dont even make the top 10 list of potential wife to be of the guys they go out with. And some married men do have such girls too. they call them stand-by lovers. who are called whenever madam is not around or whenever oga is going on a road trip. sometimes these girls serve as escorts. they are only good enough for flings/short time affairs, but not good enough to be married or taken serious. alot of girls out there are seen like that by most guys these days. and these girls dont even know. some of them usually think they occupy a special place in the hearts of their guys or are in their future plans. forgetting that, most guys usually see them as a play thing. used to while away time while the main thing (wifey material) is either not around or is being awaited. And guys do this to girls, cos girls throw themselves freely and cheaply to guys. either due to deception or false hopes. Girls should stop being used as bitches. you deserve something better. you really need to sit down and mend your ways as well. No kommittment, no kerewa...period!

"How do I breath without you, if you ever go"...is a line from a popular love song. There are many who feel like this or are in this state of mind whenever someone (a lover mostly) wants to leave them. they get so sober and feel its the end of the world for them once someone walks out of their life (some even try to take their own life cos of this). But funny enough three months after such a break-up, he or she is still very much alive. breathing and working I guess. so, it baffles me when I see or hear people (guys especially) are in such a state of mind because of a woman or man. Having put all their hearts and hopes in a relationship, not a few are left in a state of pain, anger or shock whenever such a relationship comes to an end. But no matter what, life goes on. you just have to pick yourself up and move on with your life. it just wasn't meant to be. Cos no guy or girl would leave you if he or she loves you. while the person is enjoying herself/himself with another guy/girl(a new lover), you're there sulking and crying yourself to death. Haba! After such a break-up, you're bound to feel bad and heartbroken. but you'll surely get over it if you really want to. and you'd certainly find or meet someone else later. Even someone much better, I tell you. And come to think of it, is there any love worth dying for in this time and age, my dear, my brother?

Can a blessing also become a curse? that's the big question. especially in a marriage or relationship. we have cases of couples having issues over job, money or contract. and atimes over promotion. and also if the couple are living apart cos of work. this can also cause a crack in a marriage. Like a man having to leave his family cos of work after being promoted and posted to a new office in another state. despite being promoted and having enough allowances, increase in salary and other job benefits, such an elevation is suppose to be a blessing to the couple. but dont be surprise it can also cause them to drift apart or start having issues. some marriages have suffered or have been broken as a result of the man living far away from his wife and kids. cos of the nature of his new post, status and living arangement (probably living all by himself in a four bedroom apartment, with an official car and housemaids to tend to his needs), the man could start straying/misbehaving by mixing with other ladies and going to clubs in order not to feel lonely or be unhappy. and before you know it, his new lifestyle is bound to have its toll on his marriage/family. its also the same with a woman, who has to leave her husband, to go and work in another place. it might be in an oil company with a fat/juicy salary and other benefits. but if care is not taken, such a development/promotion can cause a crack in the woman's marriage. if things are not handled properly. I've heard and seen cases like that. where a man and his wife are living far from each other cos of work, and were only seeing each other like once or thrice in a month. But along the line, they started having issues cos of the distance between them. issues such as lack of care, money, infidelity, and what have you. despite the fact that the man and the wife were both working with big companies and were going home with fat pay checks. and could afford anything they wanted and also for their kids. but they had issues. cos of the distance btw them. and both of them weren't willing to make sacrifices for the other cos of their jobs. and as a result, their marriage suffered for it. we hear cases of men misbehaving after being promoted to a big post or securing a well paying job. carrying women or taking their wives and home for granted. we've also heard of women who start behaving anyhow once they secure a better job than their spouses or get promoted and start earning more than their spouses. meeting other big men/important people, and travelling to important places and abroad, in the course of their work can also get to a married woman's head if care is not taken. And before you know it, she is bound to start taking her job or career more serious than her marriage/home. So my dear, my brother. can a blessing also become a curse...if its not handled properly.

Can a woman prevent her husband from cheating on her by being faithful, loving and caring. And also by dressing and looking sweet and sexy all the time.Can all of this keep her man away from other girls. Cos nowadays, most married women because of the roving eyes of their men, now wear all sort of sexy clothes, bum shorts, trousers, skirts, leggings and undies everyday just to keep their husbands at bay/home, and away from the snatching arms of other girls. But tell me, how can they stop the chicken from crossing the road? How can they stop their men from resisting or falling for the scheming charm of other girls/women. Cos some men cant just stop chasing girls no matter how beautiful, faithful, sexy or loving their wives are. there was one I used to know in Lagos, who had a very beautiful, faithful, loving and industrious wife. His wife was an head stunner, whom many were ready to give anything to have. but he wasn't grateful for what he had. despite having such a sweet wife and a lovely family, this man was also a chronic womanizer. who later fathered a child with another woman outside. You can imagine. And according to a lady, you can't change or stop a man from cheating on you no matter what you do, cos its in their DNA. tell me, is it true?

Being controled (put under a spell) by a girl in a relationship, is like being on a plane filled with snakes. Cos travelling on a plane is suppose to be a pleasure ride. but when a plane is filled with snakes, you can imagine the kind of trip you are bound to have. That's the same thing with a man/guy dating a girl who unknown to him is fetish or using 'jazz' to have a hold on him. making him look/behave like a mumu. cos whenever a guy is going into a relationship with a girl, he's going into it with positive expectations. but when the guy now end up being jazzed by the girl, you can imagine how the relationship is going to be afterwards. some men are in such a relationship/under a spell. and when you see them you will know. and not a few ladies are now doing juju (voodoo) to hook or have a hold on a man, in order to have control over him and also for other benefits. But just like the case of everyday is for the thief but one day is for the owner, definitely one day such jazz is bound to fail. No matter the number of times a girl goes to renew it, surely her jazz over a man would become watery/useless one day, and all her evil deeds would be exposed. and for those ladies doing jazz (voodoo) to snatch someone else's husband or boyfriend, get your man back or fight someone over a guy using jazz. you are bound to lose the guy in the end. cos by the time both of you (another girl) are using jazz to win/control the same man, you are likely to end up killing/damaging the guy in the process. situations like this do happen. Jazz is not the answer. what's yours is yours. temporary is not the same as permanent/long lasting. Fake can never be genuine. Love can't be forced or bought or influenced. it flows naturally. Jazz/juju will definitely fail you one day. and yawa go con gas for your face.

" To those who are good/Godly, we need to be strong spiritually, in order not to become a ritual in the hands of ritualists (the wicked)"

This is when a man or a woman agree to marry each other with some conditions attached to it. especially if the other partner is somehow forced into the marriage and not because of love. There are some marriages where couples dont love each other or where feelings aren't mutual at all. either the wife is doing all the loving and the husband is doing all the resentment or vice versa. especially if the woman was suppose to get married to someone else before being forced by circumstances to marry another person entirely. women who are in a loveless marriage, hardly hide their dislikeness for their marriage or hubby. they show it, by living as if they are still single, flirting with other men or by keeping in touch with her preferred love or ex lover(s). in a marriage like this, you find the husband doing most of the house work (that is if the wife is willing to do anything at all), like baby sitting, cleaning the house, doing the laundary and grocery shopping, and cooking as well. such men whose wives dont love/show them love, are most times found with an apron tied round their waists. cos they are always in the 'kitchen' or doing one cleaning after another. Like the story of a guy who met and got married to a lady living in the same neighbourhood with him. he loved her, but she was only interested in him cos of the need to get married and have kids. they eventually got married, but the woman wasn't inlove with him at all. she only wanted to be married and have kids. And being in a loveless marriage, made the man sober most times. he was virtually the home maker, cos at a time, he wasn't working while the woman was the one working. so, he was the one taking care of the kids and the home while she goes to work. and this kind of made the wife to treat him more like an 'helper' and not as her husband. while the man sulked silently she was having a blast with friends and other family members. there are alot of people in a loveless marriage like this. and most times, they dont know what to do. they just sit in it and hope for the best while preparing for the worst...If you notice that the person you are dating is not in love with you, its better you forget about him or her before its too late. getting married to such a person later would do you alot of harm than good. its like digging your own grave. Love is very important in a marriage. Lack of it, makes the marriage a mere charade...And we do have alot of couples in such marriage nowadays. that's why we hear cases of abuse or violent acts among couples these days. Cos of the absence of love in their marriage. my dear, my brother...Love is the key!

Guys that run after fine girls, see what Maneta did to Roki (on big brother stargame)...pouring BLEACH on a man's face. you can imagine what a girl like that can do to any man or lady that steps on her toes...beauty is not everything when looking for a partner. character matters alot. guys make una shine una eyes o...

It is said he who finds a wife, finds a good thing... Most times, people make mistakes when choosing a life partner. They lose the right person for them and end up with the wrong person due to one reason or the other. atimes due to lack of seriousness or due to pressure from others. like a guy (Jimmy) who was dating a good girl (Amanda). Amanda was a caring, loving and understanding girl. who never gave Jimmy any wahala. and was even helping Jimmy to manage his finances very well. but despite all her good qualities, Jimmy was fond of cheating on her, was ungrateful, treated her anyhow and never showed any sign of commitment in the relationship. and when Amanda couldn't bear it any longer, she left him. and it didnt take her time before she now met and got engaged to another guy. at first Jimmy behaved as if he was better off without her, but along the line he was filled with regrets later and wished Amanda was still with him. Since most of the girls he later met and dated after Amanda left, weren't as good as she was. But by the time he realized his mistake, it was already too late, cos Amanda had met and gotten married to someone else. There are people who have gone through similar experience like this. And it was either due to their fault or due to external interference from parents/family or friends. But who suffer the most? them of course! alot of guys have lost alot of good girls (wifey material) in the process of wanting to experience life or experiment with other girls. same thing also applies to ladies who have driven away alot of good suitors/potential partners with either their bad character or wayward lifestyle. Please my dear, my brother when you are with a good guy or good girl, try to appreciate him or her. treasure the person, and try to make things work out. dont chase the person away by treating him or her bad, or by pouring cold water on his or her love for you. if you treat a good guy or girl bad, there's every tendency that someone else would treat you the same way too. That's life. and that's why hearts are being broken anyhow these days by guys and girls who are out there on a revenge mission or are being used by karma as a payback. If you are with a good guy or a good girl, try do the right thing or try make things work out between the two of you. Cos if you dont treasure him or her, you are bound to lose that good guy or girl to someone else. My brother, my sister na so life be o!

Is the promise of marriage the same thing as marrying someone? cos the way some girls are quick to move in with a guy once the guy says he wants to marry her, is getting to another level these days. Girls no longer wait for guys to do the right thing and saying 'I do' first before moving in quickly with the guy one time, and refering to him as her 'husband' when the guy is yet to meet her parents/family or pay the bride price. Girls make una dey use una head o. One lady did the same mistake recently, and got herself messed up by the guy. Now, she's trying to rebuild her life after being used and deceived by the guy. This kind thing na plenty nonsense o.

Most single &matured ladies tend to make shakara alot whenever dey're approached by guys. Which has made alot of them to lose potential suitors/partners, in the process...Maybe dey feel all men are bad and shudnt be trusted. Forgetting dat in a crate filled with bad eggs, you can still find some gud ones...abi no be so?

Nowadays you see alot of young single ladies wearing all sort of seductive dresses (bum short, pencil jeans, leggings, tights/with sexy tops etc), all in the name of fashion. And they dress like that either cos they want to attract men or cos they are looking for...suitors. But when married women(with kids) wear the same thing, what are they looking for?

You and your partner can make your relationship strong and solid through the following means...

1. When you and your partner makes the bible the center of your relationship. spending time on the word together is crucial to growing your faith and your relationship.

2.Your relationship can also be made solid and strong when you are comfortable being with the other person. which is the real strength of a relationship.

3.And also by praying together with your partner. For a couple who prays together-- stays together.

4.One thing we can learn from Jesus is how to be selfless. It is important to practice this as often as possible in our relationships – and to be sure that that selflessness goes both ways.

5.Couples who are perfect for each other still don’t always agree – it is important to know that it that is okay! God’s wants us to learn from each other, and disagreements are one way for that to happen.

6.It is essential to be able to go to church together for the teaching, the community, and to have a common understanding of each other’s beliefs.

7.The person God has in mind for you will be perfect for you, but sometimes you won’t always agree on what to do for fun. It is important for your boyfriend/girlfriend to know that you care about the things they enjoy even if you don’t enjoy them yourself.

8. Getting out of your comfort zone can be a good thing! However, if the person you are dating continually insists that you do things that you aren’t comfortable with, no matter how big or how small, they are not the person God has planned for you.

9. All relationships are different, but these “big topics” can make or break them. While not “first date” material, it is important to discuss these four topics in order to know if this relationship is a part of God’s plan.

10. No one knows where God plans for them to go or what God plans for them to be – both of you must be willing to submit to God’s will!

Courtesy Jesus Daily...

This is when as a child you always want to be around your mom and dad (especially with your mom). But as you are growing, you are gradually drifing away from them. Since you are now a big boy or girl, you seem to crave less of their company, protection or 'petting'...as a child you do a whole lot with your folks. confide in them and also spend lot of time with them. u welcome them with joy and embrace each time they come back from market or work. you peck them, help to pick their hair, assist your mom in the kitchen (even if its only to watch her cook), play video game with your dad, etc. but as one becomes an adult, we tend to do less of all this while drifting away gradually/unknowingly from our folks. I call this law of diminishing love... Abeg, make una dey cherish una papa and mama all the time o. no matter what. For my bible tells me in Proverbs 6:20, to follow my father's good advice; and never to wander off from my mother's teachings. Abi no be so?

There are some relationships which are just like the one between the debtor and the creditor in the merchant of venice story. For Antonio (the debtor) wont have gone to Shylock (money lender) to borrow money if he wasn't cash-strapped. Nothing would have brought the two of them together, if not for the financial issues Antonio was facing. Same thing applies to some relationships, based on one need or the other. some girls are known to enter a relationship reluctantly, due to one reason or the other. some might be as a result loneliness, adventure, money, payback or for other benefits. most times it has to do with some circumstances beyond their control. Like a girl who decide to befriend her lecturer in school so as to push up her grades or reluctantly give in to the advances of a sugar daddy so as to pay her mother's hospital bills/take care of her siblings. or when a girl whose boyfriend is not around (travelled out) make up her mind to catch some fun or start a relationship with another guy out of loneliness or due to the desire to keep her body warm. Or like in the case of a guy who after spliting from his girlfriend might want to start a new relationship with another girl, just to forget/spite his ex. or probably he has made a bet with his friends to date this or that girl for a while ( like what it's happening to some Nollywood actresses). He might even be dating a girl simply cos she looks like someone he admires or is lusting after. Like an Omotola or Genevieve look-alike. It's not every guy that approaches a girl, do so out of genuine feelings. likewise a girl who agrees to date a guy just to fulfil a desire or need. What I'm saying in essence is that on a good day, some people wont date some people. But atimes they are somehow 'forced/made' to due to one need or the other. Sometimes two people can come together not cos of love, but due to some circumstances far from love...

We have girls who are not only a burden financially, but in other areas as well. If it's only financial needs of a girl a guy has to deal with, that one no be wahala. But we have ladies who come with alot of 'baggages' into a relationship. Some have had a very rough past and have scars of past relationships. And tend to be a problem emotionally. there are those who give guys both emotional and psychological stress apart from the financial burden they bring with them. as a guy, you find yourself tending to her emotional needs, especially if she's a 'drama queen', nag alot, snaps all the time, weak around men, cant stop flirting around, cant manage funds, cant do anything on her own, not clean/organized or tend to be troublesome/quarrelsome. All of these issues are enough to give a guy psychological stress. every now and then you are always doing your best to make her stable, happy, and satisfied. you work your ass off just to make sure she's ok. There are girls like that. week in week out, there's always an issue to resolve. while trying to handle the financial aspect, you are also faced with her emotional and psychological needs. Atimes you find yourself psychologically down. hoping for all of this to end someday somehow, while looking for a way out. That's why there're guys who dont get so attached to girls due to the above reasons. all they want to do is to get in, and get out asap. they must have seen it all or heard it all. and prefer to play safe at all times. Nowadays most guys tend to run away from ladies, who feel once they are dating a guy, he automatically becomes their father or chief benefactor, and should take over their responsibilities/burden. They dont care how you do it. All they're interested in, is for you to meet their various needs all the time. Shikena!

You are constantly maltreated, cheated on, abused/assaulted or humiliated either by your boyfriend or girlfriend, and yet you choose to remain with him or her. What kind of love is that? Some say na pity while others say na lust. And there are those who feel such foolish love no be ordinary love.

Some call it love, others say it's out of pity. while there are those who feel such a love no be ordinary love. There are ladies who are in abusive relationship but still stick with the guy probably cos of financial benefits, while guys who still stick around an unfaithful girlfriend might be doing so, cos of lust. But both the girl and the guy are bound to claim it's out of love. Love ke? I call that kind of love battered love. When you are constantly in pain or heartbroken, and yet you wan die put for man hand or woman laps. My friend, think twice before you take your hand do yourself. An unfaithful girlfriend or an abusive boyfriend isn't going to change just like that (i.e if the person is willing to change o). If you are hoping he or she would change later, you are only wasting your time. Remove your slippers, hold am for hand, begin pick race from that kind relationship when you still can. for there are many carrying permanent scars of past relationships about. And I guess you dont want to end up like that?

I was talking to a guy the other day on my way back from a trip. and in the cause of our discussion, we also talked about single guys and getting married. He was really displeased with the way some young married guys are so much involved in extra marital affairs these days, (some with prostitutes), despite the fact that they are 'happily' married. Some of whom are his colleagues at work. according to him, there are some who keep their wives in another town, so as to be able to have flings and affairs with enough girls. He believes once a guy is married, he should do away with those things that would tarnish his image as a married man. and he should also do away with friends that are still single and that might be a bad influence to him. cos definitely a single guy that flirts alot wont be of any good to a married man. He believes a married guy is bound to be influenced negatively if he keps hanging out with unmarried friends. And that's the case with most married men, who stick around womanizing friends that are still single. So, should married guys stay away from unmarried friends, in order to keep their 'sanity' or should they dine with them with a long spoon? to me, except you want to do it, that's when someone can easily influence you. so, married guys who are still having flings and affairs with other women and using one excuse or the other for doing such are just looking for an excuse to justify their actions. Same thing also apply to a married lady who still maintain contact with some of her unmarried friends. some men dont like seeing their wives associate with unmarried friends. they tend to believe they are bound to be a bad influence to their wives. they do their best to cut off their wives from such friends. citing all sort of excuses/reasons for taking such an action. cos most times, an unmarried female friend might want to go to parties, club, cinema houses or to events where they are likely to meet or flirt with men. and from there anything can happen. and a married lady could start getting ideas after accompanying a friend(s)to such places and mingling with other men or ladies. Abi no be so? Like what happened between a couple, who started having serious issues after the wife went with her friend to visit an 'uncle' (you know most of these so called uncles are really not their uncles). and before you knew it, she was introduced to another 'uncle' who started spoiling her silly with gifts, attention, leisure trips and money. and it didnt take long before she started having second thoughts about her marriage. Presently, their families are trying to resolve the issue. But the woman's heart is already elsewhere (bought), and she's determined to move on with the other man... You see what we are talking about. Most times, its advisable to be wise and cautious if you are married and still want to maintain contact with friends that are still single. Nobody can force you or influence you to become like him or her, except you want to...the power dey your hand!

this is when a guy or a girl mistakenly forget or leaves his or her phone with his or her girlfriend/boyfriend, only for the other person to later see all the complicating love messages exchanged with someone else on the phone,and also get to receive calls from other girls or guys. Same thing also applies in the case of a man or a wife who mistakenly leaves his or her phone at home, only for the other spouse to see it and find some complicating messages on the phone or receive calls from another man or woman professing his or her love or talk about their previous escapades. That kind thing na real yawa o. Cases like this do happen, and it could cause alot of palavar between a couple. especially if the other party has alot of secrets hidden in his/her phone. There was a couple I was told about who had a similar experience, but theirs was just some months after their wedding. While at home, the wife mistakenly left her phone on the bed and went to have her bath. And while having her bath, her phone started ringing, and her husband who happened to be closer to the phone now picked the phone to receive the call for her. And guess who it was? one of her secret lovers! The fool didn't know he was talking to her husband and started calling her by her pet names and also talked about their plan to meet later at a particular hotel in town. And you can guess what happened later between the man and his wife...that was the end of their marriage! There are some people who wont allow their partners (boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife) to touch their phone. probably because they have enough secrets hidden in their phone. Cos, why wont you allow your partner to use or touch your phone, if you have nothing to hide. And come and see the way some used to quickly grab/pick their phone, if they are not close to their phone and a call happens to come in, in the presence of either their boyfriend or girlfriend. You can guess there is enough skeleton in that person's cupboard! due to the manner he or she is always over protective of his or her phone whenever they are with their girlfriend or boyfriend. Abi no be so? if your guy or girl dey behave like this, make you check him/her well well oooo.

According to face2face media, a lady who is presumed to be infected with HIV is daring armed robbers in Nigeria to come and rape her, since they derive so much joy in rapping innocent girls and women. That they should come and rape her too. "Make thunder destroy them." as she has vowed to ply Nigerian roads day and night henceforth with the hope of being attacked and raped by armed robbers. so that she can infect them with HIV one by one. The lady in question, is a very pretty and sexy lady. in her mid 20s. She is even finer than Beyonce and has a sexy shape that would make a man wet his pants. So, armed robbers beware. cos you dont know whom you are rapping. You might be rapping a girl and digging your grave as well. Cos this lady is out and determined to infect any armed robber that comes her way with HIV...

Some relationships are initiated with the hope of taking it to the next level (marriage). But people do go into relationships with different motives. Some to have/catch fun, test enough girls as possible or enjoy life first before settling down. while others are to find a soul mate/partner to love and settle down with. But not every relationship is bound to end up in marriage. some are cut short within a short time, while others lose steam after a long while without getting to the finishing line. there are people who had enough relationships before they finally got married. and we also have those who were lucky enough to end up with their first boyfriend or girlfriend. it does happen, but it's very rare nowadays. when we have lot of guys and girls out there who are only interested in catching fun and nothing else. You might be entering a relationship with genuine reasons, while the other person (your partner) might have ulterior motives. when you're looking forward to getting married, he or she is thinking of when/how to end the relationship and move on to another person. there are people like that, who are somehow afraid of commitment. they just want to have fun and nothing else. there are guys and girls who have lost count of the number of relationships they've had. the ladies or guys they've met, used and dumped. the several hearts they've broken and the pain they've inflicted on others due to their selfish reasons, are nothing to them. Like the story of Chiamaka, a young pretty lady working with an oil company. Who felt she'd found her soul mate and future partner when she met Dave, a banker with one of the new generation banks. while Chiamaka was hoping and looking forward to settling down with Dave, Dave was only catching fun, and saw her as another play thing. he never had the intention of marrying her, but played along. he even went as far as meeting her family (some guys dont even make any attempt to meet the parents/family of their girlfriends), and made them to believe he had good intentions towards their daughter. But eight months into their relationship, Dave started dragging his feet and finding faults with Chiamaka. And as if that wasn't painful enough, he began cheating on her 'openly' just to get her off his back. he later changed the keys to his apartment, started avoiding her/her calls and before you knew it, he ended the relationship via a text message. alot of girls have had similar experiences like this. some have since moved on, while others still find it difficult to forgive and forget, after being used and dumped just like that...by guys who are only interested in dating them, but cant marry them....

This is when couples are having issues in their marriages or relationships based on accusations or hear-say. especially when a wife start getting suspicious of her husband based on what she's told or due to his closeness to a lady (or ladies) either at work or in their neighbourhood. Likewise when a wife is also being accused of infidelity based on her closeness to her boss or a guy/men due to her line of business. or when a girl is also accused by her boyfriend of being unfaithful after being seen with another guy or in another guy's room. it goes on and on. and most times such a thing do happen as a result of lack of trust. And atimes such suspicion or accusation are baseless. except there's enough proof or convincing evidence to show/prove that the accused is as guilty as charged. if not, the accuser is just looking for an excuse to 'hang' the accused (like giving a dog a bad name, in order to hang it). Shikena! and alot of relationships and marriages have been broken due to false accusations. Like the woman whose husband nearly broke her head simply cos she was seen laughing and talking with another man. seeing them together made the husband to conclude they were having an affair. You can imagine. there are many cases like that. and some are based on past issues/offence committed by the accused. and because of that, there is no more trust in that relationship or marriage. any small thing, accusations would start flying here and there. And some are not even given the chance to prove their innocence/defend themselves before they are either sent packing from their matrimonial home, dumped or banished from the bedroom (until further notice), when the accuser becomes the judge, the jury and the executioner.

According to face2face media, Any lady still cuddling a teddy bear at 20+ is suffering from what? Heartbreak, depression, loneliness, or dejection.

There are four categories of people online/facebook. And they are known as the good, the bad, the ugly and the dirty.

1. The good: is either a guy or a girl who thinks he or she can find true love online. And they are ever open and too trusting, only to get disappointed/hurt in the end. since they are bound to meet bad guys or girls. especially those seeking for a serious relationship online. the possibility of finding an honest partner online is very limited. since most guys and girls on facebook are like vultures. seeking for whom to devour.

2. The Bad: he or she is on facebook to get a boyfriend or girlfriend, use him/her and later dump them. he is a loverboy who is always on the look out for cheap girls or easy women to woo, seduce and lure to his den before milking them and throwing them away like a sucked orange. he's a born heartbreaker. while the girl is only looking for whom to send her recharge cards, pay her bills, buy her lunch, pay her school fees, and infact carry her burden for her. if you are looking for true love, you are wasting your time with such a girl. she's virtually dating and obtaining from all the guys on her friend list on facebook. some of whom she also sleeps with, just to get what she wants from them...MONEY!

3. The Ugly: are guys or girls with complex issue or those ones living in fantasies. they do their best to get hooked online. they tend to give in easily to advances from guys online. Some of them always feel they are not attractive enough and do feel excited whenever a guy shows interest in them on facebook. and there are those ones (especially guys) who are so crazy about girls on facebook, and crave so much to date every one of them if possible. they ask every girl they meet on facebook out, they go to any length to meet them physically. hoping to bed them if given the chance.they dont believe in having a relationship and tend to see every girl they meet on facebook as a slut.

4. The Dirty: are those ones looking for friendship with same sex. they do the unthinkable by asking people of same sex for a relationship via facebook. they come at first like a nice/normal person. only to reveal their true colour after developing a close rappot with the person online. many have experienced such kind of people on facebook. and most of them are ladies.

So, mind the kind of request/friends you accept and make online. Just like there are nice people out there, there are also alot of vultures and insane people out there...

This phrase is usually used when two people or two lovers wants to be discret about thier excapades and agrees to keep it a secret between the two of them. Same thing also applies to what is happening online these days especially on facebook, where you find married couples flirting and cheating on their spouses at will. most of them do it so passionately and dont even care if they are married or not. while others do it secretly and constantly watching their back. Like a man who tries to monitor and prevent his wife from going astray, only for her to be flirting and having lovers online. some of whom she meets secretly. so tell me, who is fooling who? many times, you find a woman complaining of being ignored or snobbed literary by her husband. who seem to spend more time on his laptop (facebook/twitter) everyday, chatting and flirting with both girls and women, while his wife is left on her own, lonely and dejected. oblivious of what her husband does online. and there are some men, who even after work still find the time to go online, and start chating with their....(you know) late into the night, while their wives are left alone in the bedroom. Many are so addicted and connected to their internet lovers than they are to their wives/partners. But the day the woman would get to find out what her husband does online, may God help the man on that day. Cos katakata go bust for that house o. No matter how they try to prevent their partners from knowing about the 'dirty' things they do online, no how no how, their spouses would definitely find out someday. Cos, there is no how you can make what happened in vegas, to stay in vegas forever. It must come out oneday. the best way a couple can be truthful and honest with each other is to have the same password, and also allow each other have access to their facebook accounts...Shikena! if you're certain there's no skeleton in your facebook cupboard....abi no be so?