₦airaland Forum

Any girl that is dating/sleeping with a married man will surely end up an unhappy old maid (an old single babe), or have problems in her own marriage if she's 'lucky' enough to get married later. for life is all about give and take. you only get what you give. and by indulging in adulterous affairs with married men, you're only doing yourself alot of harm. look around you, and check out most of the girls dating/sleeping or that have dated/slept with married men. how far with their lives? apart from the monetary/material benefits some of them get from their married lovers, are they really happy and fulfilled? most of these girls are either living alone in a big apartment or moving from one place to another looking for where to lay their heads (imagine with all the runs wey dem dey do) many of them live a confused and frustrated life. while others are getting married, they are being used and dumped by this and that married man. there's no joy in dating/sleeping with married men. and not a few ladies have been used for rituals or made useless by their so called sugar daddies/married lovers.
just have it in mind that when you date and sleep with a married man, you're only destroying your destiny. and whether you like it or not, you'll surely pay the price, sooner or later!

This is when a man or a woman risk his/her life just to monitor or catch an unfaithful partner red handed. there are people who usually go the extra mile to prove/confirm their suspicion when it comes to the issue of infidelity either in a relationship or marriage. just like the case of a wife who decided to pay her husband an unexpected visit inorder to catch him red handed, having heard of his numerous affairs with several women in town. the woman and her husband lives apart cos of her work. the woman lives and works with an oil company on an island off PH, while her husband lives in PH. and cos of this, her husband has been using it as an opportunity to cheat on her steady. and in order to confirm her suspicion and all the rumour she's been hearing, she decided to pay him an unexpected visit and also risk her life by using a local speed boat to cross the sea (which was also very rough at that time) to port harcourt instead of using a much safer vessel for the trip. you can see the extent some people can go, all becos of love? what if the unexpected had happened to her while crossing the sea (God forbid!) what would be her story later? the highest she can do, is to scream, shout, shove or slap the hell out of her husband and his mistress if she happens to catch them in the act. but you know some men, are very good in hiding things like that. most men do theirs in coded places such as hotels or in any of their friend's place, if they dont want their wives or neighbours to suspect or report them to madam. So, her taking such a risk may not even be justified or give her the desired result at the end of the day. So, why kill yourself then? it's just like someone paying a private investigator to spy on his or her wife/husband. for wetin? that's taking things too far. this is a normal practice abroad, where couples spy on each other due to lack of trust. but it's also gradually cripping into our society as well. cos some of our people are doing it now. abi na lie? please na beg I dey beg, life na jeje. dont kill yourself or go mad becos of love. you only have one life to liv

This is when a woman completely neglects her husband because of her child. Most women are selfish. once dey start having kids they tend to neglect their husbands. Some of them get married for the sole purpose of having children, and nothing else. and once they've achieved that, they tend to neglect their husbands and pay more attention to their kids. and in such a home, it's always baby this, baby that, all the time. and some women if they dont want to bring the baby to sleep on the same bed with them in their room, go to the baby's room every night to sleep. while leaving their husbands to sleep all alone in their matrimonial room and on their matrimonial bed every cold night. You can imagine. But when the man start reacting now, the woman would be the first to cry wolf, when she was actually the one that started the whole thing. Most men marry cos of love, while most women marry to have kids. if na lie, ask any woman how many kids she'd like to have, and she'd be quick to tell you she wants 5-6 kids. imagine, for this kind economy of ours? they do as if, they love their kids more than their husbands. for where! without a man, and without his love, a woman cant have a child. the two of them have to come together to bring forth a child. and when the kids are all grown and gone to live their own lives, who is the woman left with? her husband ofcourse. the one she didnt care much about when the kids were born and when they were growing up. so, my dear, make una (women) dey endeavour to share the love btw una kids and una husbands. neglecting ur men cud make dem begin look outside for dat attention...dont be surprised that's why some men have sugar babes outside, when their wives are busy tending to their kids. these outside girls have time for them and make them feel 'loved' and wanted. since their wives no get their time again. abi no be so?

A friend of mine is madly inlove with a girl he met online (on facebook to be precise). they've met a couple of times, and this guy really like the girl (so he claims). though they have mutual feelings for each other, but the girl is reluctant to commit herself. she says she cant date the guy, despite her feelings for him. do you know why? simply cos they met on facebook. for the fact that it was on facebook they met, she said she cant date him for that reason, and my friend has been trying to convince her for weeks now, that it doesn't matter. that love can be found anywhere, and at any time. but this girl has refused to change her mind o. she simply doesn't want to do any facebook love. which of recent is becoming more of a notoriety. She's concerned about what her parents/family would say once they get to know that it was on facebook she and the guy met. and as a result of that, she doesn't want to have a relationship with the guy. my friend is restless and doesn't know what to do. cos he really likes the girl, and believes she's the one for him, not-withstanding that they met on facebook...

It's a common thing to find eight out of every ten naija babes to be double (atimes tripple sef) dating or into runs. Many of them cant keep to one guy, due to emotional/financial reasons. especially campus girls. even with the Cynthia incident, many of them still hook up with strange guys met online. and many of these girls are adamant and wont becos of what is happening to other girls (the raping, drugging and battering), stop doing their runs. to them, it can happen to anybody. even as we speak, some girls have travelled to abuja, lagos or port harcourt (and even to Ghana)to do their runs with 'strange' men. including those met online. they are still going to sex parties or what have you to sleep with men for money. no dignity among our girls these days. sleeping with this or that guy week in, week out is now a normal thing to them, even with the risks involved. so tell me, how many of you guys can really vouch for your girl. how many of you can beat your chest and say you're the only guy she's dating/sleeping with presently. Check her phone, and you'd be close to an heart attack. good girls don finish for market! Some say na poverty dey cause am, others say na greed.

If you see the number of names and phone Nos of married men with some girls, and how these girls display and throw their names/Nos, and even their pics here and there...their wives would definitely shed tears, and bite their nails...

Living as a single mom or dad could be both interesting and challenging, depending on the angle you're looking at it. most single moms at the initial stage tend to find it difficult coping while raising a child alone. especially when they aren't getting any support from anywhere. and making the matter worse is having to juggle it with either your job or business. it's never easy even if you have your mom, a sister or househelp to assist you. you still have to play your role as the mother or father of the child. but come to think of it, we hardly have much single dads around. cos most of them dont waste time in moving on, either by remarrying or finding another partner/woman to take care of their kids for them. or better still, give the child to his parents or to the mother of the child to look after while he supports her with funds for the child upkeep.
so lets talk more on the single moms. Cos you see them everywhere. at the work place, market and even in schools. and nowadays three out of ten women you meet, are single mothers. abi no be so? And most of them always find it difficult to move on. cos anything they do, they have to consider the well being of their child first. either when relocating, remarrying or starting another relationship. it's never easy for such ladies. and may God help you if your child doesn't like or get along well with the new man in your life. and once a child doesn't approve of his/her mom's new lover, that relationship is bound to be on shaky ground. cos the happiness/comfort of your child should always be your top piority as a single mom. though some kids do this out of jealousy or concern for their mom/real dad. they always feel the new man is coming to take their place in their mom's life. and are ready to do whatever they can (even as small as they are) to frustrate the relationship. as a single mom in such a situation, all you need to do is to sit your son/daughter down and have a heart to heart talk with the child. And when other explanations seem not to work on the child, you can as well tell her your reason for going into a new relationship. yes nah! abi the child wan make hunger finish the two of una? cos. it's not every single ladies that are working or doing business. some of them can barely take care of themselves not to talk of adding a child to their responsibilities. And taking care of a child these days no be moi-moi. my dear, una dey try!

Most guys may not fancy the idea of dating a girl that has been with a guy or enough guys before, probably in a long relationship. like when a girl has dated guy A for like two years, left him and dated another guy (Guy B) for another two years or more, before now ending up with you. How would you feel? considering the stuff she must have done with these guys while dating them. such as taking in for a guy and losing the pregnancy later, have lived before with a guy for years as a live-in-lover (even playing husband & wife), or was once engaged and already known to the family of a guy before calling off the engagement. Can you as a guy later date a girl with such a past?

It's complicated is usually the response you get from some girls nowadays, whenever you ask them about their relationship status. I begin to wonder, what's complicated about a girl's love life? is it the shape, size or colour of their relationship? does it have to do with her guy's love for women/cheating habit, size of his pocket/financial status or probably due to religion.

Cos religion also plays a vital role in most relationships these days. Except you already know where your relationship is headed, you may not want to consider the issue of religion if you and your partner are of different religion. cos if marriage is on the plate, then the two of you really have to sit down and talk about it. who is shifting ground and who is converting who? will it be the guy or the girl? alot of relationships have failed/broken up due to the issue of religion. even marriages aren't exempted from this issue as well. you can imagine, how a home'd look like if the husband and wife are practising different religion. it's better the two of them stick to one religion or forget about being together.

and when things are complicated, it can also be due to the topsy-turvy nature of the relationship. especially when a couple is always quarreling and insulting the hell out of each other. always breaking and making up like night and day, and making a mockery of the love they claim to share. it can also be due to the financial status of the guy. whenever things aren't going well financially in a relationship, the girl is bound to have a complicated mind set towards the guy. except she's just in it for a short term. if not, finance is a serious matter in every relationship.

and infidelity or lack of trust in a relationship can also make it a complicated one. most times, girls still leave room for other guys to come into their hearts even when they already have a boyfriend. they do this when they are not sure of where their relationships are headed. and as a result, you find most of them still hanging their 'wares' in the market. and hoping for a better buyer to come and price them well...

This is when you lose someone so special to you, and cant stop thinking about him or her. even after meeting or getting married to someone else, you still cant forget about him or her. you think about the person, and see flashes of your past together. but unfortunately, he or she is gone for good. and there's no way of getting back together. in a situation like this, you just have to let go, even if you still feel something for the person. people atimes use their hands to chase away the person meant for them. they do things they later regret. and by the time they realize their mistake, it's already too late. like the case of a girl, who was going out with a very nice guy. she was loved and cherished by this guy and treated like a queen. but she ended up messing up, which resulted in their break-up. she thought she wont miss him or need him again, and dug in deep with other guys. but as time went on, she began feeling his absence and longed for him to come back into her life. the other men she met afterwards were only after 'one thing' , and weren't as loving and understanding as the guy. there were nights she cried and cried, regreting her mistakes. and having deleted his number from her phone out of annoyance when they broke up, there was no way she could get across to him.and so she started hoping and praying to see him again. but by the time they eventually met by chance, it was already too late. the guy was now engaged to another girl, and were just two weeks away from their wedding. that was how she lost her baby. Gone, baby gone. Dont use your hands (bad character/lifestyle) to ruin a good relationship or chase a good person away from your life. cos you may live to regret it forever!

@ sexkillz, tobechi20, Etranshub, D-explorer etc, the issue is not about me, but about every single girl out there that's 30 and above and going through similar experience. it's a general topic concerning the life of an average single naija babe. who may not give a hoot in public about being single, but in reality she feels the pain, crave for a companion and is also worried about her single status.

A Perfect Plan...this is when you plan to graduate at 20, get married by 23 or 25, and finish having your kids by 30, only for what seem like a perfect plan to later take a dramtic twist. Especially when a guy is made to derailed after meeting and falling madly inlove with a girl on campus. and cos of her had to forgo his own plans and concentrate on achieving hers or when a girl mistakenly gets pregnant while in college and made to withdraw from school, to become a single mother.

When A Girl Is 30+...and still single. Though she's 30+, she still look young and feel young. And she's less bothered by what people say about her. Since she's comfortable, has a good job, a nice apartment and a fine car to go with it. And she dresses and wear things younger girls wear. Though she feels lonely atimes, especially in the night, but she consoles herself either with her BB + pinging to keep herself company, or by watching romantic movies and cuddling her teddy bears to keep herself warm. she partys alot and hang out with other girls, but it can never be like when u're with ur family (wife, husband and kids). and atimes it's fun when you're single and happy, and not under the 'chain' of any man. but the only 'comma' in all of this, is that each time she wants to hang out with other girls, she realizes that these girls are still in their 20s and she's like a aunty in their midst. since girls her age are already married...married with kids!

@ Opeyemi AD, nope I'm not the one. and for your information. I'm a female. he told me, the girl was also shocked to see him but both of them didnt say anything to each other until he left with his brother. it was while they were going home that he later open up to his brother and told him about it. but he says his brother has refused to call off the relationship and also their wedding plans. cos he is madly inlove with her.

A friend of mine is having sleepless nights right now, cos his older brother is planning to get married to his ex girlfriend. him and the girl broke up about a year ago, before she now met his brother via a friend. he didnt know she was the same girl his brother has been telling him about until some few days ago, when he followed his brother to go and see the so called angel, he's madly inlove with. only for the girl to be his ex girlfriend Cecilia. he wants the happiness of his brother, but at the same time cant bare to see his ex get married to his brother. the pain would be too much for him to bare. so, what should he do. he really need your advice!

Saying You're sorry...saying this most times, can help save your relationship/marriage. Simply saying I'm sorry to a partner can help save your relationship or marriage in a long way. some people find it hard to apologise even when they know they're wrong, due to pride. and many have experienced series of failed relationships as a result of this. even in a marriage, when a couple are having issues and neither of them is willing to swallow his or her pride and do the right thing. which is to apologise. they are bound to have enough grudges or unresolved issues in that marriage. so, it's better for one of them to apologise, say I'm sorry and find ways of resolving the issue amicably. Most times, girls dont like admiting their faults and saying they're sorry whenever they're having issues with their boyfriends. they always want the guy to apologise first. and you know guys nah, with their ego may also be reluctant to do the same. and when each of them is waiting for the other to apologise, their relationship is bound to suffer for it. and not a few have walked out of relationships simply cos of small issues like this. Saying you're sorry wont take anything away from you. it would even help to ease your mind, encourage forgiveness/repentance, and also provide the two of you the opportunity to resolve the issue quickly and amicably. so wont you prefer to say I'm sorry, rather than go through the pain of an heart break?

It's never a good idea for a lady to tell her guy about her past and all the terrrible/dirty things she might have done with other guys before meeting her new boyfriend. Cos when such secrets are revealed in good faith, it could back fire on the girl. cos it can make the guy to dislike or lose respect for the girl. You find some girls atimes doing some crazy stuff when they are in a relationship with a guy, out of stupid love. it could be infrom of taking nude pics or performing several dirty sex acts on their guys. most times they do these things just to please the guy. you can imagine how a guy would react or feel after being told or shown pics of his girlfriend's dirty past. the best thing to do is to forget about your past, and become a better person in your new relationship. Shikena!

Getting married these days is becoming more of a necessity and not cos of love. Most times, you find girls wanting and craving to get married, not cos of love but cos they just want to be married and put to rest any pressure they might be under or could face later. even before a guy pop the question, the girl might have said yes in her hearts...a million times. And not a few girls are compromising nowadays just to get married and have their 'peace' of mind. that's why alot of marriages are breaking up these days. cos of the absence of genuine love/feelings between couples. Even guys too are getting married these days just to have kids and also have a woman at home to take care of the home and do other things for him. they see their wives more of an 'helpmate' than a soulmate. that's why many of them still go out to catch fun with other girls/women. giving a wife a comfortable home, enough allowance and kids, to most men is enough for any woman. so, what else again does a woman want? forgeting that the presence of true love does alot in a marriage. true love helps a couple to understand each other the more, work together, be honest with each other, and be able to weather any storm together. but since many now see getting married as a necessity and not cos of love, what else are you expecting in such a marriage?

Brave Heart...this is when one suffers or pay the price for love. especially in the case of a long suffering lover, whose love and affection for a guy or a girl is not reciprocated. he or she is made to endure, tolerate or go through alot of pain, rejection and agony in the hands of his/her lover. But despite all of this, his love for the girl is never shaken nor found wanting. Rather than back out, he's determined to stay by her side, endure for as long it takes and succeed in winning her love and acceptance eventually. like the case of a boy and a girl, who used to live in the same neighbourhood with me when I was growing up. their relationship was like a cat and mouse kind of relationship. they were always fighting and making up. atimes the girl would even pour urine or feaces on the guy, or tear his clothes whenever they are quarreling, just to make him hate her or break up with her . but the guy simply refused to let her be. he was hopeful of winning her love and changing her for good. they continued their topsy-turvy relationship until when the girl secretly went and joined the convent to become a nun. and that was it! that was the end of their love story. there was also another couple like that, who went through alot just to be together. here was a girl, the most beautiful girl in the neighbourhood then, and the pride of her family, going out with a riff-raff (according to her family) of all people. the guy had nothing, but was able to win the heart of the most beautiful girl in the neighbourhood despite the number of rich guys that were coming for her. but the family of the girl were against the relationship (cos of the poor status of the guy) and did all they could to make life unbearable for the guy. but to cut a long story short, despite all they (her family) did to break them up, the girl and the guy were able to weather the storm until when the girl eventually eloped with the guy to Cote 'de' Ivoire. where she later had a son for him. but unfortunately, that was also where their fairytale love/relationship eventually came to an end. Cos the girl later left the guy for good. right there in Cote 'de' Ivoire! Atimes such love are rewarded. but sometimes it can go from bad to worse. So, are you ready to suffer for love. Is your heart brave enough?

Most guys and girls tend to run away from a guy or a girl that's not tushed, fine enough or sofisticated. They are usually attracted to the opposite sex only wen he or she is sweet looking enough. Anytin contrary, you are on your own! But notin stops you from turning dat gutter looking guy or girl into a charming prince or princess. All ds fine fine girls and guys you see everywhere, it was sombody or somtin dat made dem to be like that. You can help turn a nobody into a sombody, instead of running away from him or her either cos of his/her looks or appearance. You can be the one...

Ever since my girlfriend caught me with another girl in an hotel she doesn't want to talk to me anymore. I've gone to her house severally and have also been calling her number but she has refused to pick my calls or see me. it happened that i took a girl to an hotel for some nice time, and as we were coming out of the hotel, I didn't quickly noticed my girlfriend coming towards us on a bike. it was only when she got closer to us and our eyes became four that i realised she had seen us. she was dumbfounded and shocked when she saw me and the girl coming out the hotel holding hands,smiling and gisting. she didn't stop nor come down from the bike, and i cudnt do anything but stared at her with shock as she rode away on the bike shaking her head and crying. while the other girl just stood there and was watching the whole drama. and ever since that evening, I've been begging my girlfriend to forgive me. I feel so bad for what I did. cos she is a gud girl and has never cheated on me ever since we started dating. What am I going to do. I dont want to lose her. It's very rare to find a good girl like her, these days.

This is when a guy or a girl agrees to date someone not cos of love nor cos he or she likes the person, but due to their desire to hurt or break the person's heart.
Most times, you see guys going after this or that girl not cos they have any genuine feelings for her. they only want to chop and dump her. some of these guys are serial heartbreakers. and have lost count of the number of girls they've broken their hearts. on their phones or album you see several pics of girls they've used and dumped. and most times they boast about it to their friends or colleagues. dating and dumping girls to them is like a game of chess. and they see themselves as the king, while girls are like 'pawns' on which they prey and feast on anyhow. and you may not know guys that are like this, cos they look good and nice all the time, and tend to sweep girls off their feet with their kindness or sweet talk. and they dont have any intention to love or date any girl for long. theirs is just to get in and get out as quick as possible. and move on to their next victim, shikena!
While in the case of a girl, she may decide to date a guy either to eat his money or intentionally make his life miserable. we have girls that are like that. they know how to pretend or fake their love/feelings for someone just to achieve their aim. the most wicked ones are those ones who would pretend until they eventually marry the guy, know his in and out, have access to his bank accounts and money, plus his other investments. most of which they end up cornering (taking over) before dumping the guy like bad habit. these ones dont have hearts again. and we have the campus ones too. they always say yes to every guy that approach them for a relationship. and once they've got the guy, they start making demands upon demands. And if the guy is lucky, she may allow him to 'touch' her just once or twice through out the duration of their brief relationship. cos their type hardly allow guys to 'touch' them for nothing, except the guy has invested well on them or they've seen what they can get/benefit from the guy. if not, na only for dreams the guy go dey touch her. they keep dating, 'duping' and dumping guys till they graduate. these ones are also known as serial heartbreakers. most times you see them coming home to laugh or make mockery of this or that guy, with their friends. And they can pretend, so you may not even know them when you see/meet them.
but funny enough, after all of this, you find many of them craving to get married later. marry who? guys wey una don break their hearts finish? ok o.

Saw an episode of Mnet Naija soap Tinsel last nite, and I must confess the standard of the TV serie has really gone down, compare to when it started some years back. It's more like a nollywood movie now. Abeg the producer and the director should do something about it. this is the only soap (Tinsel) Naija has on Mnet oooo. lets do it well!

the court scene i saw in last nite's episode wasn't good enough. haba, its suppose to be an international serie, and not a nollywood or idumota kind of movie. and it seems the experienced hands handling it before are no longer involved. cos I know what they are capable of. and the storyline is still poor. there are lots of socio-economic issues, as well as correct romantic stories they can inculcate into the serie. a TV serie shud be a kind of timeline, telling us about the lives and experiences of the characters. the producer can get enof stories to add into the serie from soji and philip characters alone. Bimpe's character isnt doing much, while the rivalry between Fred and Brenda can be made to take another dimension...they shud just try and spice it up, and conclude this master's case once and for all. it's suppose to be a soap centred around movie studios/families involved in a fierce battle to gain control of the industry. but we are not seeing much stories about other practictioners in the soap,apart from telema, telema and telema. for crying out loud, she's not the only character playing an actress in tinsel. nollywood is a very big industry, with enough practitioners. whose experiences both at home and in the industry can be inculcated into the TV serie. please, lets make things better! Tinsel is all about our entertainment industry. so, lets do it and say it, the way it is...

This is when a person decides to 'pay' back someone for the wrong he or she might have done to him/her in the past. such things do happen and some people take theirs to the extreme. Like when a girl is prevented from marrying the man of her choice by her parents/family. If it happens that the girl is either forced or made to marry someone else instead of her prefered choice, she may end up 'hating' her parents for this. and she might even decide to pay them back by not loving the man chosen for her by her parents, or by making the marriage unbearable for the man. or in some cases she may decide to run away/elope with her preferred man. such things used to happen in the past, but I dont know about it now. And this can also happen in the case of a guy who is not allowed to marry a particular girl due to some circumstances. he may as a result hold a permanent grudge against the family or people behind it and could later decide to pay them back somehow. And some of these issues concerning politicians or state governors being insensitive (doing bad) to the plight of some communities, you never can tell could be as a result of an old wound/issue between the community and the governor. and being in a privileged position later, the politician or governor may want to use it as an opportunity to have his/her pound of flesh. And atimes when the break-up of a marriage or relationship between a couple is caused by a third party, either of them may want to pay the person back in a bad way. some take their time to get their revenge. they wait for the perfect moment or time to have their pound of flesh. and this issue also applies to the case of boyfriend or girlfriend snatching or when one's love is rejected. such rejection/incidence could make some decide to have one form of revenge or the other on the people/persons involved. And believe you me, most of the problems or issues affecting our society today could be as a result of old wounds. but funny enough and looking at it very well, such vengeance/act do not amount to anything. cos whatever you might have lost in the past due to the actions of others, you can never get it back. it's gone for good. And getting your revenge later cant even give you a lasting satisfaction or joy. so, what's the need for it in the first place. Why not let bygones be bygones. And leave everything to God. Shikena!

This is when as a guy you happen to stumble upon a beautiful woman either on your way to work, in church or at an event. but you're prevented from making a move on her due to one reason or the other. or cos you're too shy to approach her. and as she leaves, you console urself with the hope of seeing her again and eventually making a move on her. but my guy, such things only happen in dreams or in movies. but in real life, such opportunities hardly come twice. if you fail to make such a move at that moment, there're a million and one guys just around the corner waiting to make the move you couldn't make on her. and that could be the end of your dream/plans. you know guys nah, dem no dey take eye see fine girls. na so dem go dey lick their lips and sweeten their mouth whenever they wan chyke babes. and most guys dont leave what they are suppose to do right there and then till another day. they do it right away. so, whenever you see a girl you like, dont be afraid to walk up to her and initiate a decent and light conversation with her. she wont kill nor maim you. the highest she can do, is to snub you. but if you keep postponing such opportunities till another day, my guy you go remain a bachelor for life o. most girls aren't like cinderella that would leave behind their golden slipers or some traces for you to use in locating them afterwards. if you dont do it there and then, then you may have to say bye bye to her. Cos opportunities comes but once. And dont even make the mistake of asking your friend to help you chyke any babe, if you dont want to lose the babe to that same friend. except the guy na monk. do it yourself, and make that move right there and then...

This is when a man or a woman is lucky to escape from the grip or captivity of a wicked partner either in a relationship or marriage. especially when a guy would have unknowingly ended up with a bad or irresponsible girl, only for him to change his mind and be saved from future calamities. or when a girl is prevented from getting married to a bad man via divine providence. and also when someone is able to get out of an abusive relationship/marriage, after enduring so much pain, insults or injuries. I call such occurence lucky escape. you can imagine the kind of pain or heartbreak such a person would have gone through if he/she had ended up with such a person. many are in a relationship/marriage that's far from what they anticipated. some are lucky to swim out of it later, while others simply sink in theirs. living with the pain or scars for the rest of their lives. especially those in abusive or loveless relationship/marriage. most times, when one is able to get out of such a relationship or saved from ending up with a wrong/bad partner you just have to thank and praise God for the lucky escape. Like the story of a girl whose hand was being seek by a guy.the guy liked her and had already gone to meet with her parents for her hand in marriage. but unknown to the guy and the girl's family, the girl was into runs and other bad things on campus. nobody knew about this, cos each time she comes home, she's always pretending to be a good girl. the guy would have married her, if not that he was later told (also taken to see things for himself at her school) about her irresponsible lifestyle. immediately the guy got to know, he instantly called off the wedding. and that was the end of the whole charade...But some aren't that lucky to find out/know. it's only when the deed has been done they now start regreting and looking for a way out.

This is when a girl ends up losing her fiance to another woman due to her desire to finish her studies first before getting married. or when a man while working hard and trying to raise enough money to get married and provide a comfortable home for himself and his wife to be, ends up losing her to another man. such is life. we do have cases like this. and some are due to external influence or interference. either from parents, family or friends. especially in the case of a girl. who may want to wait for her man, but might be 'forced' by circumstances or pressurized to change her mind and end up with another man. atimes, it's not the lady's fault. alot of things do go into consideration when it comes to the issue of getting married to a man. comfort comes before compatibility in most cases. a girl would want to marry a man that can provide/care for her and her family. gone are those days, when girls used to stand by a struggling guy with prospects. things have changed. they no longer wait. girls now go to the highest bidder. comfort first and love later. that's why marriages are failing and falling anyhow these days whenever financial problems rares its ugly head. if you are not ready (be you a man or a lady) to settle down either due to financial constraint or other commitments, dont get angry when your guy or girl decides to try his/her luck elsewhere. na so life be!

This is when a couple are staying together but living apart. though they live under the same roof, but the husband despises the wife, and doesn't even eat her food nor sleep in the same room with her. the man brings in different girls, treats his wife anyhow and humiliate her atimes in public. but despite all this, the wife still loves him and carrys out her responsibilities as a wife. with the hope that things would change for good between them. and she still cooks for him everyday, even though he doesn't even look at it, how much more touch the food. she also washes and iron his clothes, clean and even arrange the room he sleeps in...with other women. The wife is still hopeful but the man wants out. He's still in the marriage cos of their parents. but determined to make the marraige a living hell for her. tell me, if na you be this kind woman going through similar experience, wetin you go do?

This is when a couple especially in a relationship are tought to be perfect in every area. that many admire them while some envy them, not knowing that the couple are actually in a cat and mouse relationship or one on a shaky ground. we have many relationships like that, whereby the couple pretend before others to be happy and loving, but once they are at home and alone, they despises each other. Like the case of a lady, who is presently going out with a fine rich guy. to her freinds, she is a lucky girl, to have such a rich boyfriend who loves her, and also takes care of her and spoils her silly with money, gift and attention. but her friends dont know what the girl is going through in the hands of the brute. yeah, her boyfriend is a brute, one who treats her like his personal property. and according to the girl, whenever the guy wants to have sex with her, he does it rough and by force. leaving her sore and pained. and most times, she uses make-up to concealed her scars each time he beat her and gives her a black eye. And she cant even remember the number of times, he has torn her clothes or undies whenever he wants to have sex with her by force. and after doing this, he usually apologise and gives her money or gifts. And she dare not wrong him or cheat on him. You can imagine what someone that beat her all the time even when she doesn't do anything, would do to her if she's caught cheating on him. Doing that would be suicidal on her part. But despite all of this, she dare not leave the guy. cos he keeps threatening to harm her if she does. and also because of what she's benefiting from from the relationship. he pays her school fees, buys her clothes, gives her enough money regularly and also takes care of her family. There are many girls in such a relationship but cant quit cos of the benefits they are getting from the guy/relationship notwithstanding the pain or battering they go through everyday. which they hide from their friends or family members. And whenever you see them, they (especially the girl) behave as if all is well and that they are in a loving and wonderful relationship. you can imagine! If na you, wetin you go do?

There is this friend of mine whose heart is broken. He and his girlfriend have been dating for 2 years and were even planning to tie the knot. But ever since he took his girlfriend to workship with him at his church, their relationship has been on shaky ground. it happened that on that particular sunday, been her first time in church, she was seperated from the guy and taken to another part of the church meant for first timers to sit (like they do in some churches).And it was while she sat there that a wealthy brother in the church sighted her and later approached her after the service. they exchanged numbers and began seeing and calling each other without the knowledge of my friend. My friend didn't know nor suspected anything at first but noticed that her feelings and interest in their relationship was becoming cold by the day. he later got to know via someone in the church and that the new guy (church brother) wants to marry her. and cos of the new guy, she hardly picks my firend's calls nor visit him like she used to. Now, my guy is heartbroken...he's afraid he's going to lose his girlfriend to the church brother, who is richer than him and has been spoiling his girlfriend silly with money and gifts...