₦airaland Forum

I don't know what to tell you, but if it were me, I lead team separation and divorce

I would have separated with immediate effect and let elders come and sit down discuss this rubbish( like the do in naija movies)
This is a tough matter, what has mArriage turn into nowadays.

Ewuro4:
She's ONLY worried about losing her marriage, NOT her & her baby girl's self worth in the family.
That's just brilliant.
Phew!

MRBrownJ:
HOLD ON A SEC!!!!!! how long were you guys dating before you decided to get married?! the ex's baby was born while you were heavily pregnant?!?!?!?!? meaning your husband cheated during all this while, hhmm not good! your husband's ways are the biggest AND ONLY problem here.... the day he starts to respect you (or your union) then everyone else will follow suite.

he dated her out of pity because "she didnt want to move on".....ooooh what a nice guy he is!

This are the only two sensible post you should pay attention to

Forget about all those annoying praying warriors advising you to fast and pray
As if you have not been fasting and praying all along

Seun, Ishilove, lalasticlala

Nigerians always embarrassing africans
If it is not fraud, scam, its rapist lol

Airforce1:
She's beautiful

but why is she dark skinned

Can't she bleach?

Because she is proud of her dark skin and making it international

I notice most East Africans are not crazy about bleaching like we Nigerians and Congolese,

lalasticlala

Front page material

The name Nigeria should be changed to crimegeria

Chai always Nigeria, a name very synonymous to crime,
Can we change the country's name

Why do nigerians condone crimes

Scam and fraud is not a crime to a nigerian.

You tell people you are a nigerian they walk the opposite way

You will never find uganda, ghanaians, togolese or other africans getting this greedy

Always nigerians embarrassing africans why nigeria why

Kendraloops

It was hard for me working as a pregnant woman I had very bad pregnancy, though,
Some people can still work until last minute.

Shameless man, she should have castrated him right there before he rapes all the neighborhood kids

I hid my pregnancy then got a job
It was cold when I went for interview
So I put on big coat and got hired
They regreted but I was already there tired and lazy.

Women are more emotional beings while men are not.

Ignore the people saying that weed is ok

Weed or any form of illegal drug is not fine

How many lives have been ruined because of co dependency, smuggling, trafficking,

Please talk to them and report them to your folks

Tallesty1:
I tried telling him that but I couldn't prove it.

I mean, if she's frustrated as he is then why is she giving him attitudes? They are supposed to stand by each other in a time like this.

Why not call him once in a while to know how he's faring?

Why not stay with the man's family?

People handle frustrations differently when we were facing a tough time in our lives, I was nagging hubby more talking to him anyhow, he had to talk to me, and this startled me, sometimes she don't even realize she is pulling an attitude talk to her. Most women handle stress with outburst.

Ethiopia has a national airline carier so do most African countries like Kenya, Rwanda, Sa.
Nigeria has none

Sorry you are facing tough times, remember no condition is permanent, God will see you through

As for your wife, she is probably as frustrated with the situation as you are, I bet it's not easy for her to depend on her parents too,

Just be patient and understanding with her too, you both need to sit down and communicate all this issues,

I watched this on Tv in awe

Very privileged, kids, big fancy house, well groomed yard, picture perfect family

Then they attacked their family

I bet you would forgive them because you gave birth to them

And demand they seek psychiatry help, and drug rehab, then they have to live very far because you can never trust them again.

crackhaus:
You mean in Nigeria where women are disrespected, discriminated against, and looked down upon?
A Nigeria where being a woman is the next evil to being the devil himself?

So mothers (women) are cherished more than fathers (men)?

No way!
Chimamanda Adichie must hear this...

I think she meant to say kids love there mothers more than fathers

I understand your pain

I always tell my husband if he cheats I will do exactly the same

Anyway for the sake of those kids, you be the grown person( don't compete with him)

I applaud that woman for standing her ground

A man sleeping with prostitutes then carrying the product to your faithful wife

No wander women turn into gold digging

This does not happen if you marry dangote or dangotes son

Only in some punitive village, esp if you are unemployed housewife married to some yeye clown like this

dominique:
Why on earth will you spring that kind of responsibility on me without discussing with me first? It's better you stick with the baby mama option, since you will clearly have no regards for your partner.

dominique ignore him his kind seeks attention

iPopAlomo:
we know the type of woman you are... so if I came home with an adopted kid... you'll turn the child to a maid... more reason why I do baby mamas than wife...

This is not even an adoption case, no wander people fail exams tremendously, read the article three times if you are slow

Do you even know if the man can take care of the four she has to just show up one day carrying another one,

Then what will the babies real mother do, fix her nails and sleep with some more husbands.

iPopAlomo:
What would it cost the woman to care for the child...

no need to batter anybody... but if she was my wife... she knows she's packing out that same day...

Shay me way get plan to even adopt children... that aren't even mine... just to care for the child... e don turn to work...

Fucking witch... women are women's greatest enemies... it's obvious she would turn the girl to housemaid sef... she as she resemble kirimanje...

She is not obliged by law, culture or religion to take care of illegitimate kids

When paying her dowry did they add extra to take care of another woman's child?

Since you are a philanthropist and huge on adoption why don't you go adopt that baby
Empty vessels make the loudest voice, I rest my case

Sad sad sad.
Wonder where their relatives are at this time of need

And her inlaws could not intevene

Then people will ask her to fast and pray to win the mans love

harbeedaymee:
She deserved it. Why did she reject the love child? What has the innocent child done to warrant such a harsh reaction?

She has a right to refuse
She never sighned up to raise his adultrous out of wedlock kids

Nigerian men sha!
Here in togo we dont hear this garbage

Onegai:
If not for the time frame, I'd swear the OP was married to a cousin of mine. He made all the same promises to his wife. Who idiotically believed him and was rushing towards marriage.

Instead of her to sit herself down and ask why his first wife divorced him. The first wife only stood the nonsense for just so long. Wife no2 was too busy daydreaming about how the "Lord will. change him" and was encouraged by countless Naija relatives to "endure and prayerfully guide him" we his family knew better. Now wife no2 cannot open her mouth and complain when he goes so far as to sneak his friend's gf into his family home for a quickie during his father's burial (yes he did this. Yes we caught them and yes his wife silently "endured" the pitying glances and mocking comments made her way after the friend had come and started a fight and dragged his cheating babe).

OP should talk to another aunt of mine, who was also an Endured Wife of over 20 years. She advised me to never value any man because none are worth it. I suppose there's something to be said about staying together for the kids but that level of bitterness I saw from that lady, naahh it's better to leave and keep your sanity.

The OP has described a man out of control. Yes, God came change him. But is she willing to stand by him and be exposed to whatever whilst he decide what he wants to do, no matter how long it takes? That's her decision to make.

You have said it all with perfect images, the ball is in her court.

I would never stay in such a marriage, the mental torture, the agony, the pain, heck no

No guarantee he will change, cheat me one time I forgive, second maybe, 60 times girl run for

You dear life,

Do you have a job?

How many kids?

This is not what marriage is supposed to be, please I would support you if you choose divorce,( I don't mind the double standard hypocrites that run around here)

Poster stay away

When some people hate you, they find you irritating trying to impose yourselves on them

The fact that you live closer, is a recipe for disaster

Just exercise wisdom,

Kabonic and krystal do you two have to flirt here
How juvenile smh