₦airaland Forum

Do you have reliable family support in US, you will need people to help you with babysitting, job seeking, driving and all that.

It is not easy in this country as a newbie and with a baby, trust me, plan adequately

Your husband has another wife,

What kind of a spouse does not pick a call when they are away, just prepare for a polygamy family.

Husbands are supposed to pick calls any hours of the night you call them when they are away, please have a conversation with him,

I have a friend whose husband used to go on this business trips not picking the phone, until my friend found out he had promised another woman marriage and already had a baby with her, apparently when my friend would think he had gone out of town she came to discover he was just a few blocks from their house at another woman's house.

He is no longer interested, you have not stayed around him long enough for him to study your mood,

Move on, the early the better

raumdeuter:
Which one of these 2 places are you guaranteed to have papers to stay in?

Each of this countries have a long process of acquiring documents, none is guaranteed, it is not easy

nnamdibig:
Now I believe there is something like "new generation wife".

For God's sakes they never liked you & the only way to make amends is to spend time with them during your child birth. In my side, when you have a child, your mother comes over for omugwu not the other way round.
If I may ask, So your fear is that your MIL cannot take care of you & your new born baby? Or that your mum cannot come over & stay with you guys while taking care of you?
You better amend things with your new family. You are there to stay & will one day act like her if you don't like your son's wife to be.

How do you expect someone that hates you to take care of you during childbirth? This is the time you need genuine love and care especially if you went through a c section.
Why can't mother in law wait until she is healed to come bond with her and the new baby?

Canada anytime

ATMC:
Did I hear someone say she should apologise to her MIL? Pls what for?

1) For not coming from same tribe as her husband?

2) For the fact that she was the chosen one?

3)For desiring to be with her mum first time (meaning she's considering being with her MIL when next) which is normal

4) For being hated

What exactly should she apologise for? Chai!

This is a woman that made effort to go be with her MIL who declined on the ground that she went to her mum first...who finds fault with her?

Twinkie8 pls rest, assured that if one wants to love you, like your husband, s/he will find a reason. The same thing applies if anybody wants to hate you.

Voice of wisdom, you have nailed the truth, people do not understand that the problem is with the hating in-laws and not the wife.
Let the wife be, all this uneccesary stress

ATMC:
I disagree with you. For heaven's sake it's her first child and her mother must have looked forward to the omugwo. You heard her that after her time with her mother she wanted to go spend time with her mother in law but she bid her not to come. Who does that?

The mother in law ought to know better that this girl will be displeasing herself if she be with her first instead of her mother. This is sheer case of you can't tell the heart who to love.

It is clear that she was hated before she was chosen and not even the husband can salvage the situation. There's a limit to what he can do.

You are right, they hated her before she got there because of tribe, what is she supposed to do about things she cannot change

Ignore haters concentrate on your life.
As long as your husband is on your side, the family will come along someday

You cannot change your tribe to please them, just be yourself and when they figure out you are here to stay they will embrace you

RiloKiley:
Its possible the mother in law didn't like the girl at first glance and is using the opputunity to chase her away. Her response would determine where the relationship would go next. Her getting angry and walking out of the relationship could be just what the mother in law was planning all along.
She could humbly take the clothes to waah and the mother will drag the clothes back from her, or she cold go ahead and wash it and her mother in law will respect her all the more for it. She can quarrel with the boy after they have left the house to show her displeasure but the fact that she can wash her mother's clothes means she should be able to wash her boyfriends mothers clothes as well.
If your boyfriend's mother telling u to wash her clothes is enough to break your love for him then what kind of weak yeye love is that? Good riddance I say.

Washing clothes for a prospective mother in law does not make them like you, some hate you immediately they hear you are from a specific village,
I think it is outright evil for a mother in law to make a potential wife wash her clothings.

panafrican:
First US President visit since 1928
Still No red carpet, no National anthems. We even don't see Cuban President at the airport, why ?
Everybody knows the harsh feelings between Cuba and the U.S. after the revolution and the Bay of Pigs invasion,but the two countries decided to get alone, so why this cold welcome ceremony?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b9c7cKbZj2A

That is how the state prepared the visit. In fact the first family arrived on a rainy day

You are not being insensitive, you are probably getting overwhelmed and frustrated with your ttc journey and having to take care of her,

I wish all her kids would be highly involved so you all can have split the time she spends in each kids home, maybe take it as a compliment she prefers being taken care by you,

My mom prefers being taken care off by my only sister in law than her two youngest biological kids, the rest of us are abroad so my sister in law is always helping her out but temporarily.

I know you are trying to avoid future conflicts, apply wisdom and knowledge, don't make her assume you want her gone, promise to take her back to her house and arrange for more visitations.

Call off that wedding, to avoid all those touching gory stories you will be posting after the wedding

The signs are written on the wall, you know he is a serial cheat and you are ready to say I do with him,

He abuses you, you are still there, poster what is wrong with you?

Warn him sternly, what kind of nonsense is that,

He is not a baby, I would sit him down and lay it out and in the open, I would also give him an option to remain with the girl or let me go.

Wonder where all this people with low self esteem come from,

You teach people how to treat you, and if you are passive about matters of exes and side chicks oh well!

Desperate marry by force, fire and brimstone ladies will wash the clothing

It is a no no for me! and what kind of a mother makes any guest wash her dirty linen on first day of meeting?
I will really question this woman's state of mind.

Botswana. Kenya. Tanzania

We have separate account and no financial issues

Your husband is a chronic cheat and instead of dealing with him you are here asking for solutions?
Suppose you get some irreversible illnesses,
Just endure and pray, my dear

She is probably carrying multiples

Do nothing, just wait until you catch illnesses, at least you will still be Mrs somebody

Some food with high fiber( google them) will help the baby go,
Give lots of fluid other than milk, 100% juice plus water works for my son, I mix water and juice and give it to him with every meal.
If the problem persists see a doctor,

People do not change unless they decide by themselves
You are looking at taking her the way she is
Or moving on.

What do you mean stool recurrently? I's it constipation or diarrhea, help me understand you.

I only use Johnson baby products or cussions for my babies.

What happened to village midwives that used to deliver in the villages, they are better than that little girl.

The doctor or hospital that denied this woman care should be held responsible, someone should be jailed for that woman and her kids death.

Then we wonder why we face racism, yet we have no care for humanity

I wonder why churches, Strangers could not even contribute to help this poor woman
What a shame this Africa has become and always been
Can't doctors do this then charge the woman later

datigbogirl:
Saying I'm out of my mind shows how savage you yourself are....dats d reason you can't understand the correlation of the statement just made...d USA has government backing for all emergency procedures even up to private hospitals which is also obtainable in most government hospitals in Nigeria but unfirtunayely not in private hospitals...so you expect the private hospitals to run at a loss because of Hippocratic oath even when d doctor has staffs like gateman,laundry,substaff,nurse & himself to pay....most patient will swear with their mother's grave to pay after treatment only to beat d doctor up afterwards... Guy continue your mental masturbation...

How can you compare Greater USA care to third world countries
Every pregnant woman in USA with no income gets automatic Medicaid insurance which is free covering all maternity care for mother then newborn baby until they are five years old
At least talk of what you know.

There is nothing you can do. Don't risk your life for anymore kids, just raise your girls ignore mother in law. And let your husband decide what he wants to do.

If he is the marrying type he will remarry and there is no guarantee the other woman will give him a boy.

Fake story

Are people taking this troll seriously

He has made up 5 fake stories since yesterday

My grandmother. Her memory is still alive in me. I don't think I will ever recover from her loss.
I also have regrets. I wish I should have taken her to live with me abroad. I hope she forgives me on this.
I'm naming my child after her, hopefully I reunite with her someday.

bigt2:
Isn't that the guy shouting with a thick accent "wot av ai durn? Y a yu treating me like deez, ayam not a kiriminal"??
If so, then I've lost the sympathy for him. Thought he was just being segregated. Mofo.

You got me laughing.
Shameless man indeed, he is not only loud but too old for such debacle.

byvan03:
It was 100% accurate for me, please cherish your blessings. Many will give an arm just for a child.

Both mine were 100% right.
Poster just thank God for your baby irregardless of the sex