₦airaland Forum

I don't understand what the moral dilemma is... If she can afford to live alone, go for it. Eazy peazy

ucham:
Typical. You consider all your populace African, yet you lazy small statured sloths keep attacking your white Lords. Killing them and collecting their farms.

Your people are known to be remarkably stupid. So it is no wonder you can put on a facade of ease while your cultural heritage is depleted.

Typical Stockholm syndrome. Your oppressors have become your family.

You talk of South Africa as if your presidents since apartheid have done anything. Your country is on a downward spiral. Your white masters are fleeing back to UK, Australia and the Netherlands.

Don't tell me all is well when you still suffer load shedding.

Nigeria has its challenges, yes and we will get over them. But at least having a confused identity and race isn't one of them. In the next 100 years, there be Zero pure black African in South Africa. Way to go sucker!

puhleeze tell me you are not the voice of the rest of Nigeria. Puhleeze tell me that you are the only one with this reasoning. I just can't take it if you tell me that the majority of Nigerian people agree with you. My heart wouldn't be able to get over the shock. I'm just gonna put my faith in the fact that you are the exception and one of the few with this mentality

Naija246:
shebi nah 'if' you see man we go marry you put for house nah
You girls just mention marriage as if getting hitched is that easy in modern times.

Do you seriously think any thinking man wants to
Have some leech at home eating, watching TV and getting fat while he slaves away?

You girls are in for some rude awakening as the years go by
Nah small pikin dey worry you; no worry you go learn.

Hi I don't really understand what you're trying to say...
I said "if" because it's not my mission in life to get married. I don't even want to. There are just too many things on my agenda and that's why marriage doesn't really cut it. Besides, standing in those long lines at home affairs and changing the info on my degrees, will, insurance etc is just soooooooo much effort. I'm too lazy for that Lol

thanks

lol no I wasn't a babatjie back then

It's just hard whenever I try to defend the continent and then people say things like this. I probably shouldn't get so invested in the cause... but still man, yoh ! Makes me so upset jinne. Maybe I should just learn to ignore such people.
Oh great master, teach my how to ignore the ignorant ones... Lol you've been doing this a lot longer than me

TMKsouth:
Hi Minxie!

For SA we are what we define ourselves - not what others impose on us. We are a Rainbow Nation and are as African as anyone else.

Infact, we led the African narrative through the African Renaissance concept during the Mbeki years and through our current leadership in the AU, G20 and the BRICS.

No other African nation has a louder political voice than SA so don't be rattled by detractors - not that ucham is one. But this SA is not African-enough label has been peddled by Nigeria to gain a permanent UN Security Council seat over us, it's been their strategy.

You know, it's so strange. It's almost like they're saying that to be African means that you have to have a general intolerance for everything and anything different from you. Which just reaffirms what the rest of the world thinks and says about us. But then again, it would explain the annoying tribal spats here on nairaland... I've always wondered why they struggle to get along on this platform. Now I know why... apparently it's a "purebred" African thing.

IF I get married (and that's a giant IF) I'm keeping my surname. No need to explain. Just keeping it

I'm really shocked by this person's reasoning... Interesting indeed

So is it a bad thing for people to attempt to get along? I'm a bit confused with what you're saying...

Also coloured people are not just black and white. I have more malay than I have white or black. I also have more khoisan than I have white or black.

Im really confused by the point that you are making. it's almost like you're trying to say that South Africans are not "pure" or "African" enough because we mix with other races in our country... Leave us be please, it doesn't bother us that we get along or attempt to get along. As long as we get along in our own country (and not run to others because we can't seem to find it in ourselves to try to get along), I don't see why you would have a problem with it.

wow. the bitterness is overwhelming.

IronGalaxy:
I'm still not convinced. I actually do have coloured friends/ colleagues which is why when I got to Cape Town there difference between the two coloured groups from the two respective cities was so stark I couldn't believe. There can't be a culture clash between blacks and coloureds because our lifestyles are too similar, I was born in Soweto and there coloureds in Soweto too in places like Noordgesig, Kliptown etc I don't even feel out of place in those places but Cape Town... As much as you say Cape Town coloureds are fed up with white privilege it's them who still keep voting the toxic DA in power , you guys align with whites too much over there

That's the mistake you make. Coloureds don't vote for skin or race. They vote for who delivers. so at some point they saw the ANC wasn't delivering so then they switched to DA. And now they see the DA isn't delivering so they will most likely switch back to ANC or whoever offers the best alternative. Whoever has a plan for the cape flats and giving back the properties in cape town, that party will get the vote. I can assure you that coloureds will NOT vote for a white person just because he/she is white. We know them too well. Please do some research into the local elections in the Western Cape and get opinions from people on the ground. It will help you to get to know us Also yes, cape Town coloureds have a superiority complex. Hulle hou vi hulle lekka. Lol we always say that about them. However, it's not because of race but rather because they think cape Town is the best thing since sliced bread. Back then if you stayed in cape Town you were considered as fancy. We often say: "jy hou vi jo wit" which is an insult Lol. But really, I'd love to change your mind about us. Next time you come to cape town, i will personally show you around and invite you to some yard parties and make you feel right at home. Because it is your home. Sorry for the crappy experience you had last time

sayisayi:
No sir, you just resorted to option 2 of those with low IQ. I provided facts and asked you to counter, you resorted to name calling and mis-spelling. I have been to over 25 countries in Africa and speak from experience. You have just shown yourself to be as myopic and as insular as a lot of S.Africans that have NO understanding of the rest of the continent. One X

I think there seems to be a misunderstanding between the two of you.

however, back to your earlier point, i understand what you mean about the critical thinking of people. Ive noticed it too and yes, we need to address it. It's a little difficult though because what system do we use to encourage critical thinking at Primary and high school level? I teach in China and they have the same problem. My cousin teaches in Saudi Arabia and they have the same problem. Critical thinking is way different from literacy. Luckily the government has identified this problem and are working on it, slowly but surely the curriculum is changing. hopefully in the next 20-30 years we will have more critical thinkers on the continent

IronGalaxy:
Nah, its more than that Minxie, I've been to Cape Town, coloureds over there man are something else, very different the ones from Johannesburg! from the aunty selling at a store, for example, there's something weird at the Cape and it's more than just a culture clash, its an ingrained superiority from the Apartheid times, the "at least we aren't them mentality" Granted those blacks might have sent something bad towards you but you'll agree that on the whole there's no "anti- coloured" sentiment from blacks similar to what you'll find in Cape Town, I mean come on the are even groups like " Gatvol Capetonian" that lay al the ills of coloured people at the feet of black people . at cape town coloured people seem to be gatekeepers of white privilege from what I've seen

Those gatvol capetonian people also annoy the rest of us. I think when it comes to Cape Town a lot of coloureds are territorial. They are worried that black and white will take what's theirs. It was taken during apartheid and they are worried that it will be taken now by the new government. It's obviously not the case but many coloured people see it that way. They're not anti-black, they just don't want their territory to be taken away from them again. They don't even have their land back yet and already government is making areas available for informal settlements. That's the worry of most coloureds in the flats. The coloureds are just afraid that they will be marginalized. You'll often hear coloureds say that first we weren't white enough and now we aren't black enough. They are just scared of being oppressed again. Other than that, and a few cultural things, coloureds have a good relationship with black people. I just wish there was more interaction between the two. I think both sides need to step out of their comfort zones. I think most coloureds don't like doing things outside their environment. They think the Western Cape is where the world ends. I know there is a difference between coloureds from the Western Cape and Gauteng. Remember that in cape Town the coloureds are just clinging very hard to what they once had. It's sad when you visit the Western Cape and hear of coloureds who were kicked out of what's now expensive places.
You should really engage with coloureds down here more often. We are very gatvol of the white privilege... you have to work twice as hard just to be recognized as normal when a white person enters a job and gets promoted within 6 months easily... ai

accepted

IronGalaxy:
How do you explain the anti-black sentiment so prevalent among coloured folks in cape town then?

I've come to realise that it's not hate or anti-black sentiment. It's just people don't know enough about each other. Trust me, I've received some very hateful comments from black people about my race. and some very ignorant comments as well. I don't take it seriously because I know we only receive negative news about each other so we have that idea of each other. Anyway, just because a few people make some ignorant and racist statements, doesnt mean we are all like that. You yourself know the things people say about coloureds... it's offensive too. Very. But i know it's because nobody really knows much about our culture. There is a BIG culture clash but it doesn't mean we don't like black people. Apartheid made sure to separate the two races and we are now just living with the consequences of it.

TMKsouth:
We need to hear more stories like this. How sad bout your grandparents. Very touching.

The stories are out there but not told often enough, just on Freedom Day or Human Rights Day.

Yup true dat! We as young people need to hear these things from our parents and grandparents so that we can use it as motivation to become great. I did a little research on my family history and was absolutely amazed by the kind of people that I had in my family. It just inspired me to want to be great like them.

Sharing these stories also helps us relate to each other. I think these races need to get to know each other more. Many people will be surprised by what they have in common in terms of culture especially. It's up to us.

TMKsouth:
Perhaps politically, there's also the debate whether coloureds contributed to the fight against apartheid or whether they benefitted from the system as mixed raced people. I know there's often that squabble on twitter. Then coloured people will name the likes of Patricia de Lille, Allen Boosak, district 6 to indicate their participation in the struggle.

Is this the line u were going with - joudini?

I think many coloureds feel overlooked when people discuss the liberation struggle. Trust me, they gave the white people hell here. My parents were involved in so many protests and they always tell me the stories. So many people think that coloureds were okay with apartheid but they were really not. they hated it just like the black people did. My grandparents owned a farm which they lost. My Waterboer family were basically turned into maids and farm workers. So they fought back in many ways from defying police to causing unrest wherever possible. Other than language and some food, coloured people really have nothing in common with afrikaners. Don't get me started on the language issue... it makes every coloured angry... There's one thing that we coloureds love about black people though. It's their ability to take immediate action. Coloureds will go through due process and negotiations first and often it doesn't help. So we are grateful for black people who take action faster. We always say how we should be more like black people and stand up for ourselves

joudini:
Another question on Cape Town or West Cape

I have observed on SA twitter when it concerns violence between Coloureds and others that reference is made, typically by the Coloureds, to their history of warfare or resistance.

What is the history about?

Cc: tmksouth, minxie

Yeah we have a long history of gangsters. You must note that coloureds do these activities amongst themselves. You will very rarely find a coloured gang operating outside of the country or even outside of the flats. Coloureds are also very stubborn and very passionate. Everything is just taken overboard I don't really know much about the history of gangs. I grew up in the boland (countryside) even though my family from my grandfather's side was malay. I know he was in a gang though Sorry I can't answer your questions much. People have different experiences. those in the flats are different from the "plaasjapies" (small town people).

that's true. most older people could not go to school.

however there is a problem with education even in the young ones today. not everyone who went to school can think outside the box or can make a positive contribution to society. You get those who are just dead set on becoming "stoepsitters". They are young like us. So somewhere there is a problem with education.

But most people are educated or have some form of skill and literacy.

there is definitely a problem of illiteracy but it's something we are trying to fix. Unfortunately it takes time. Apartheid left people in shitty circumstances where they couldn't attend school and the schooling they got was very limited. So it's definitely a challenge. We must just keep addressing the problem

I think it's a good thing to get another degree, however, it doesn't guarantee a job. You need experience. And unfortunately you will only gain that experience when you start from the bottom. Intern or volunteer. I know the pay would suck but it's experience. Build your CV. I know Masters students who are working intern jobs. Work hard from the bottom and keep proving yourself in the workplace. Make sure you are an asset to whoever you work for. Don't just rely on those degrees

Well, I think right after apartheid ended black and coloured didn't really know that much about each other here in the Western Cape. However, there wasn't animosity. I can tell you now that most coloureds prefer black people to white people. Especially the young ones because now we know more about each other. Yes, the old people have their views. I've heard some racist comments from old people (black, white and coloured) but usually we shut them up and educate them.

Yes there are a lot of cases where people marry and date across races. Even before apartheid ended. The only problem may be a culture clash. White people here are a little too conservative for coloureds. We are more liberal and more accepting and we love change. Sometimes there's a culture clash with black people as well because of roles in the household. But that's solved by the people involved.

I don't think there's animosity. If there is, it's individual based. Also, coloured people are very much pan african especially the young ones. We also tolerate each other because of our differences. When you have such a big pot of people in one area, you have to tolerate the things that you don't understand and you have to learn more about them. I must give thanks to the government though, especially with local programming. It made my people learn so much more about black people and the different cultures. they are no longer living in a bubble.

I will choose none of the above. I'll only make my decision once I talk to the guy. If there's no chemistry, bye felicia ! you can have all the muscles in the world or no muscles. I don't care. It's the personality and chemistry. I need to have fun flirting

TMKsouth:
Not really, we all get along.

The difference is just that the Cape lifestyle is all about the outdoors - the mountain/beaches/winelands. So they are feeling more cooped up at the moment.

That is true. We spend our days outside. It's hard not to go hiking and it's hard ignoring the beach... but oh well. Don't even get me started on missing the wine! Weekend wine tasting bye bye! What's even harder is not being able to go to someone's house for a cup of tea and gossip Lol the aunties here are suffering

TMKsouth:
They should put up strict rules like in the mining sector. But farms have gone unmonitored for decades so I doubt the skill is there to ensure compliance.

The way they've been exploiting farm workers here... I doubt that they will start monitoring covid19 when they don't even monitor minimum wage and living conditions on farms. At this point, im just confined to my house. I take a 40 minute walk every day around my house and I'm as pale as a zombie. But I'm sticking to social distancing chomi. It sucks but I'm doing it.

Also, the cases here in the boland have also gone up because people are working on the farms. It's citrus season so now labourers from all over are coming. Ceres now even has a special area for covid19 cases. And nobody is doing anything about it because the agriculture sector will lose millions if the fruit doesn't get harvested. Dilemma for days.

TMKsouth:
Their extra cash should be reason enough to stay home. Big yards and ability to buy gadgets and stuff. Why the lawlessness?

Because they can. They generally don't care about the poor. They don't care how many people they can infect if they have the virus. As long as they are sorted out in their beach-side houses. Niggie en neefie staying in Mitchell's plain or langa must ma deal and find a way.

IronGalaxy:
Capetonians in general have this superiority complex I just can't put my finger on, they think they're different to the rest of the country

I'm from the Western Cape. You are right. The people here are different. Neuk altyd links wanner di res vani land regs gan. I can't deal. They make me so tired even. You should see the way they drink and party like nothing is wrong. Even here in my town people are so chilled meanwhile there have been cases in neighbouring towns. I can say in terms of the kallits that they just don't take anything serious. The other races I don't know. I just know that government needs to intervene here

it's things like these that make my blood pressure go sky high ! I don't understand these people Jarre don't we have enough problems? But nooooooooooo, clearly surfing is the most important. I don't think these people care about the lockdown. they have extra funds, this lockdown is like a vacay to them. Hulle worry ni

Again, there's no doubt that what this person is doing is wrong.
My point was about women-shaming. I simply just asked that men stand up for women instead of insulting them so much. Or that men speak out against those men who insult the women of your country. See here's the thing, i have noticed this disgraceful behavior of girls here too where they broke shame men. And I'm speaking out against it too. it's shameful and disgusting and it's not what women world Wide stand for. This behavior, just like women-bashing, should be stopped and the mods should do it. That was my point from the beginning. It isn't nice when other people come to this platform and see how we treat each other.

Newyam:
I no nid to cret topics b4 u dey neutral. even 4 d topik, she use am insult pipu yet u no talk or condem her.

I was not aware of her insulting people. I just commented on the topic, not the person.

I absolutely condemn making fun of people's circumstances and I think someone who oppresses other people to feel good about themselves need to examine their lives. Thank you for pointing out to me that there are people who broke shame. I actually have noticed that too during my short time here on this platform and I can honestly say that I don't understand why people do it. I really don't. I have never had the overwhelming urge to make fun of someone's financial situation. I respect every career as long as it doesn't infringe on the rights of someone else. I think you are right for being angry about the op's behavior. However, that doesnt make the issue that she raised less legitimate. I hope you can understand my point and if I have offended you in any way, i am sorry... have a wonderful day xoxoxo

Newyam:
jst shut up, havn't u been riding how even d foolish op dat wrote it has bn going around dis forum insultin men.

Thank you for pointing that out. I am in no way in favour of anyone bashing anyone. The op created a topic about women-bashing and I simply expressed my feelings on the issue. If you create a topic about male-bashing, i will also express my opinion on that issue. Btw I find it absolutely ridiculous and just plain rude that people broke shame each other. However, the topic is about the way that some men have been speaking ill of their country's women.

Again, if you create a topic where you complain about women bashing men for not having funds, you'll find me in your corner fighting for men's rights too.