₦airaland Forum

candieangel12: A woman will have kids when the time is right and when she is able to take care of her children, there is no need into rushing into marriage for the sake of childbirth. If a woman knows she wants many children then yes, she should marry and start having children earlier like my mother who had all 6 of us before she clocked 35 but if a woman, for example me, wants only 1 or 2 children then what is the rush? I can only speak on my behalf because I am not against early marriage but early marriage and early child bearing is not for me. Yes having a child when one is above 35+ can lead to defects but with all the technology and the right pre-natal care, this likelihood diminishes. And maybe you forgot that it is not only women that cause fertility issues and high risks pregnancy, the man can be just as much to blame. So don't go pointing fingers at women. This is the 21st century and you guys need to get more educated on this issue instead of claiming myopic views. Be it 20 or 40, a woman should marry when she finds the right man and when she is ready to handle the responsibilities that come with being a wife and mother. No one should rush into marriage because that would be a mistake one will regret. There is more to life than all this marriage nonsense. Let's just leave it at this, I'm tired of stressing out that marriage should be done when one feels ready. Let's agree to disagree because all this head butting will get us nowhere. No one can change my views, I am just giving my own opinion to the females on here that think their lives are over because they are single and 30.

Okay,ur point is well understood.Particularly in ur own case where U are considering just an issue or maybe two.All d best! Like U rightly said,we disagree to agree.Goodnight!

[quote author=Mrs..Chima]Understanding men is just as complex as understanding women.

People need to keep it real.[/quote]Women and men are wired differently and people with authority in d field of psychology says women are more complex to understand and handle from various researches carried out . Even women know that they are indeed complex.Men are not as complex as women.No basis for comparism atall.

Just a funny excerpt below that depicts a form of female complexity for some fun;

1. (Whatever)

Men: What should we have for dinner?
Women: Whatever..
Men: Why don't we have Mexican?
Women: No not Mexican, the last time I got pimples on my face
Men: All right, why don't we have Szechwan cuisine
Women: Yesterday we ate Szechwan, today too?
Men: Hmm..... I suggest we have seafood
Women: Seafood is not good, I got diarrhea
Men: Then what do you suggest?
Women : Whatever..

2. (Anything)

Men: So what should we do now?
Women: Anything
Men: How about watching a movie? It's been a long time
Women: Watching movie is no good, it's a waste of time
Men: How about we go for bowling, or some exercises?
Women: Exercise on such a hot day?
Men: Then find a cafe and have a drink
Women: I am off caffeine
Men: Then what do you suggest?
Women: Anything

3. (You decide)

Men: Then do we just go home?
Women: You decide
Men: Let's take the bus, I will accompany you
Women: The bus is dirty and crowded.
Men: OK; we will take a cab
Women: Not worth it... For such a short distance
Men: All right, then we can walk. We can enjoy the weather
Women: I am hungry, can't walk.
Men: Then what do you suggest?
Women: You decide
Men: Let's have dinner first?
Women: Whatever...
Men: What shall we eat?
Women: Anything..

queensmith: Not at all, that was an outline but the conclusion still holds. There is no automatic translation in disease there are only indicators, ones we can assign to causative epidemiology.

When I said,'automatically translates',I was referring to ur point and not d disease(lolz) even though U understood what I meant.It's ok.Since U claim that ur conclusion (cancer is a disease of affluence) still holds.Can U pls explain to me,ow cancer is a disease of affluence? Tnx.

queensmith: You can't read, I didn't write anywhere there I carried out research, and if you read the argument well you will see that point was in response to Dankas claims the americans are spreading cancer through Africa.
I don't even want to indulge you with the rest of the nonsense you have posted since you quoted wikipedia, thats evidence enough to me I shouldn't bother wasting my time. But do read over what you quoted again, the use of the word CERTAIN!! look that up in the dictionary, and revise your argument.

Oh,sorry about that(research).U made mention of d fact that U av studied on it or something in ur previous post.Atleast U claim to av a knowledge in it.
If I may ask,what is wrong in reading and quoting wikipedia for a basic knowledge? From what I read about cancer on it,there was no place that it was stated that cancer is only a disease for d rich.Let's not shy away from d main point.How can U justify ur claim that cancer only affects d rich when we av poor people dying from it as well day by day?It is that explanation I want from U cos that was d part of ur argument that caught my attention.U're d first person that I've heard that from.Pls explain.Tnx!

MuhMubRaj: Naturalwaves bet y?

Just joking

^^^ I'm a seconder!

candieangel12: Yeah Yeah, you have it all wrong. I said a woman's fertility decreases when they reach 35+, you are saying that it decreases at 30+. I read the article and I know all about that stuff and the article is clearly stating that a woman begins to have fertility issues around 35+...so what's the big deal about marrying and having children between 30-35? Still, everyone's case is different...there are still very fertile women in their early 40s just as there are very infertile women in their 20s. So what is your point and what is it that I am wrong about? Maybe you didn't read your so called article very clearly and maybe you didn't read the women's comments on the article, one had her 1st child at 32 and the other is 40 years old and pregnant. So, again I ask what is your point? You still make no sense to me.

If U read my post well,U will see that,I said a woman who gets married at 30+ will give birth THROUGH 35+( most likely) xcept if she wants just an issue.
A woman's fertility declines with increasing age and a woman starts having fertility problems from 35+ according to d article .U forgot d fact that 30+ means any age from 30 upwards and U quickly concluded that d woman will av kids btw d ages 30-35.What if she gets married at 34 or 33 and she wants to av like 3 children? Won't she span d age 35 in d process?Or won't d children be spaced atall? If a woman spans 35 years and report has it that women from that age tend to av fertility problems,that means there is d probability of the woman aving such problems? That's d point!
Won't it be logical for one to try and av kids when there is a great chance for fertility rather than wait till when or close to when medical professionals say fertility starts declining.Y put one's self under probability when there is a phase for certainty (all things being equal).That's d point! Moving away from medicine and theories,I av seen countless examples of couples who got married late and their major challenge always seem to be d ability or difficulty in conceiving in which d major diagnosis was that d wife is not very fertile as xpected due to advancing age.
Moreover,U didn't talk about d point in d link I gave U that said 'there is a higher risk of giving birth to children with Down's syndrome,Edward's syndrome,Patau's syndrome and d likes in women that wait till such advanced ages'?.This means that,aside d fertility problem,there is also a probability of giving birth to a faulty product.
Considering all these,won't it be rather advisable to play safe and av kids at an earlier age?

dlex21: for what nah?

To flog U ofcourse

tomakint: Right on point dear!! Right on point, everyone cannot like trash! I am yet to familiarise myself with D'banj genre of music seriously! Well like you rightly said, 'let's leave them in their ignorance'!

See this funny dude,queueing behind a lady to make his points. U behave like a coward.Anyway,it is not bad if U don't feel someone or like someone's genre.That's Y we av numerous Artistes and different genres to chose from and it is not a crime also to make fair criticisms and fault someone's move when U feel otherwise.That fair criticism is what Safarigirl has failed to do.U don't make fair criticisms by calling someone a TOUT or USELESS when there is no cause for such.

candieangel12: Your argument isn't very legit. A woman in her 30s has the same chance as a woman in her 20s to give birth to a healthy child. Seriously, all you people saying a woman 30+ poses a greater health risk to fertility issues have some misconceptions. Are you guys doctors or what? This is a common lie that Nigeria feeds to our young women and that is why most of them are rushing into marriage when they are not ready. A woman's fertility decreases slightly from 35+ and it decreases a lot by 40+. There are many women that have children well into their late 30s early 40s, for example Mariah Carey and Jennifer Lopez. Tyra Banks and Gabrielle Union are in their late 30's, childless and not married. They both said they want children some day but even though they're clocks are ticking for them, they are not running to the nearest alter to get married or have kids out of wedlock. They are taking their time till the time is right for them. In this day age, with all the technology, a woman in her 50s can even have children. Does early marriage guarantee children? Some women that have been married for years are still childless, so please this whole 30+ years shenanigins is nonsense. A woman will have children when it God's time, be it 20 or 45.

U got it all wrong.A woman whose age is advanced has a lower fertility rate than a younger one and women who starts aving kids from 30+ will give birth through 35+ if such women want to av more than a kid.It was also reported that children with downs syndrome and other types of birth abnormalies were given birth to mostly by women whose ages are advanced.Here is a proof.U may like to read this;
http://www.babycentre.co.uk/pregnancy/antenatalhealth/ageandpregnancy/

Elebiju: He is too busy banning teamgarri

Lmao .He go ban U ooo

nagoma: Ruptured appendix is an emergency that can actually be treated in nigeria. Where i blame the Villa Doctors is their failure to diagnose appendicitis. Appendicitis is basically a clinical diagnosis that can be done by any NYSC Doctor. Needing no magnetic resonance imaging or similar technology.
Why they failed to make the correct diagnosis , I believe is because the Doctors are also adulators and sychophants like many others in corridors of power.
Food poisoning and Appedicitis have common cardinal early symtoms of nausea, abdominal pain and vomiting. The only way to make a quick differentiation is to UnCloth the patient , lie him /her on his/her back, and examine the abdomen in detail and you will elicit the signs that will lead you away from food poisoning and to appedicitis as a firm diagnosis. These courtier palace doctors were too shy and did not have the professional courage to tell Dame Patience to UnCloth and for them to dip their hands into her (abdomen) stomach. So they continued wrongly treating her for food poisoning on the basis of syptoms alone. Until the inflamed appendix ruptured.
No body will confirm this but I strongly believe that is what led to the crisis - adulations and fake reverence.THere is no sustitute for standards in clinical diagnosis - even when the patient is rich and powerful.

Well said.

hardbody: However i did not know that the real reason why people have children, is, according to you to take care of them when they start aging. Honestly in my world, i had grown out of that mindset. My parents have enough investments not to bother about what i am able to do for them, and i am growing mine to ensure i do not rely on children to take care of me.

You av missed d point completely.Taking care of one's parents is not about money alone.There are so many things that a child can do for a Parent aside cash.D presence of one alone at old age is enough.Even if U av enough cash to hire maids and all staffs on planet earth,d place of a child can never be taken.Who will take over all ur investments when u finally die? Families?,relatives? Government? And U will watch all U've worked hard for to just go off so cheaply like that without imparting directly into anyone to take over .If d owners of great investments didn't av children,some of d companies will not be standing till date.Infact,d process of modelling and tutoring a child from infanthood to adulthood is great fun.So,U see,aving a child to take care of one is not solely about financies.No one can take d place of a child.

queensmith: the higher incidence of certain cancers in Western regions shows us that it is a disease of affluence

.

FALLACY!!!!!!! U mean to say that;d fact that there is a higher incidence of certain cancers in western regions,automatically translates to d fact that d disease is a disease of affluence? Read what U wrote again and listen to urself.By ur argument,there shouldn't be cases of cancer in Africa then.Do U know ow many cases of cancers that are diagnosed in Nigeria on a daily bases? I lost a family friend to one this year.U claimed to av carried out a research.I hope ur research was not done in d corners of ur bedroom.U didn't find out that several types of cancers are dominant in certain regions? E.g gastric cancer is more common in Japan due to high salt intake.Colon cancer is d most common in USA,cancers spread thru diseases and infections is most common in Africa which carries about 25% of such.Maybe U did research like U said but d research failed to pass through U. End ur overall ignorance and start from d link below.It will do U a lot of good to start from there.Here it is;
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cancer

^^^^ Okay but I got to get my cane now.

[quote author=o.obim]Hahahaha!Now u feel what 'em girls feel when u tell them that nt marrying at 30 is a shame.I'm a millionaire,building my own house n aint 30 yet.Shame on u for nt owning a house at 30.Ladies,ds shud b d question u ask any stewpid man who ask u why u stil single at 30;'why aint u living in a mansion at 30'[/quote]Ur argument is so baseless and meaningless.U are comparing A WOMAN,whose period of fertility has an expiry period with WEALTH/ MONEY that has no deadline and can be made at any time.I wonder ow U made ur millions with this type of brain(no offence,just wondering).Did U get urs thru inheritance or U got fixed into a good job by a top gun? U shuld find it a lil bit tough passing a 'SHL test' with this type of reasoning.I hope Ur millions is legitimate anyway? Don't U know that women who get married around 30+ stands a great health risk and fertility problem? Except if such woman won't be giving birth.Didn't U see LEOBREEZY'S post where he gave some useful advices about what women who want to get married ASAP can start doing to increase d chances? But U were too sentimental to see that.U've forgotten that a lot of people will read all these posts even though just few of us are making comments,so,whatever U say,will go a long way.Though,I'm not in support of asking a lady Y she is not married,asking them to reciprocate such questions with 'Y are U not living in a mansion' or 'Y are U not a millionaire' will only compound things.U may give another advice.I know U can do better.

safarigirl: Pay no mind to the D'banj apologists, when you're blinded by a cause, everyone against is termed a 'hater'. I have chosen to leave them in their state of delusion like their master. Arguing with them is like trying to tell a defiant blind man the true colour of his clothes.

You don't hate him yet U called him a TOUT and U said he is useless.No sane person.I repeat,no sane person will ever do that except if such person already has a prejudiced view.This is simple logic and common sense.Ow do U xplain urself? If U can't explain that,just save urself d shame and stop making further comments.D more U try to justify d fact that u only made a fair criticism,d more S.T.UPID U sound. It is so obvious U are d one in a state of delusion. U can't expect everyone here to be as D.AFT as U.No,we can't all be a DUMMY VARIABLES.
By now,U should know that,whenever U want to make a post,U will think twice and reread ur post before U spill RUBISH!. U think U can just post nonsense and get away with it? No my dear.

I do not know what the most complex thing is but one complex thing I know of is WOMEN.

candieangel12: My age mates that are married with children have so much more responsibility, I wouldn't be able to deal with it all. I love the fact that I don't have a husband to answer to or children to take care of.

This shows that U are not even matured enough to get married.The responsibilities of being married seems to scare U such that U feel U are incapable.So,wen are U gonna get responsible wrt marriage?

candieangel12: When I come back from school, I just chill with my friends or go partying or anything fun. I love it that way and I would not have it any other way

And how long is the fun going to continue? With d way U've been sounding all through, u look like someone that will even be so afraid to pass through the process of a child delivery.My dear,life is not all about career and fun(everyone loves fun).If not,men will not even get married atall.We can just av kids outside wedlock,date numerous women and live life to d fullest.There are some certain responsibilities that comes with difft ages. In d words of SHIZZLE11,when U finally make up ur mind to stop d fun and get more serious,DONT LEAVE IT TOO LIL,TOO LATE. Cheers!!!

Dimples 316: @ Naturalwaves.

We are cool , but I really don't know what you want me to reconsider. I am not aversed to marriage neither do I hate it. I just don't feel a desire for it and am not desperate because I've turned 29.

Does this mean U could get married someday? If yes,then U already av a lil rethink atleast,U are not outrightly cancelling out the possibility of a marriage even though d probability is so so so so slim with respect to U.Just like what SHIZZLE11 has said,if d converse happens,DON'T MAKE IT TOO LIL,TOO LATE. Cheers!!

@MRBROWNJAY, That was a lovely write up even though it was quite funny.I'm sure U'lld av saved a lot of people from dipping their hands in fire.

@Leobreezy,nice write up too.A lot of persons can learn one or two things from ur post.

Dimples 316: Ahaa, good to know you are finally feeling me on some things cos I really hate to be misunderstood. I figure now you also realize I don't need a shrink right? So take that back (I wasn't offended) but would like to see you eat those words and admit you were wrong. I am waiting oooo, don't keep me waiting. One love

But I've got no soup to eat d words . Okay,okay,U need no shrink.Give me a smile and promise me too that U will av a lil rethink about it before U finally make up ur mind.......I'm waiting too.......

Dimples 316: Sweetheart I couldn't resist you on this, sex is good and yes there's the temptation to fornicate the longer I stay single and unmarried. I am not a virgin and won't pretend otherwise, I've done that whole sh****t with serious boyfriends in the past and realized it only leaves me feeling empty and demoralized on the inside so now I know better than to go there.

Sex wasn't all that WOW for me when I was doing it because I hardly ever reached o-r-g-a-s-m. I just couldn't feel the pleasure in it. I think men get more of a kick out of it than women do, or at least than I do. F-o-r-e play yes that I enjoyed, but to answer your question am not into s-e-x t-o-y-s, m.a.s.t.u.r.b.a.t.i.o.n without it I can do. I've got a vivid and wild imagination I can make myself come without the aid of s-e-x t-o-y-s or an e-r-e-c-t-i-o-n.

I could fall into temptation and fornicate I am not immune to the possibility of that, but before I get there I would have exhausted other options like masturbation or an intense body work out to rid myself of all that sexual energy. And of course there's always an ever present help in the time of need from Heaven.

Am no perfect so don't even take me up on the masturbation thing just let God deal with me on that.

I like U. U know Y? U're so objective and straightforward.May God help us.#How I wish U just av a lil reconsideration before U finally make up ur mind# Cheers!!!

dlex21: u didnt get number 2

Hello Dlex, there is nothing wrong with the answer he just gave U.It is very correct from his explanation and I got d same thing too;
U will fill d 3 gallon container with water and then pour it into d 5 gallon container.This means that 3/5 of d 5 gallon container is filled already

Next,fill in d 3 gallon container again and start pouring into d 5 gallon container.By d time d 5 gallon container is filled,2/3 of d 3 gallon container would be gone leaving just 1 gallon left which is our desired measurement.

Well,I respect ur opinion and decisions. Just a lil clarification now.

Dimples 316: I don't need to fornicate to have a child HELLOOO haven't you heard of adoption.

Yes,I av heard of adoption and one does not meed to fornicate to get a child like U rightly said but d act of fornication is not commited alone thru that. Any s3x outside a legal marriage can be classified as one.Or,are U saying U are not going to av s3x as well if U avn't anyway? Or,are U going to use some tools to take d place of d PRECIIOUS D? I want to believe U are normal like every female and ur hormones will come calling someday,so,ow are U gonna handle that? I do not necessarily require an answer to these questions.Just trying to tell U that,d occurence of FORNICATION cannot be ruled out even if U won't be aving kids.

[quote author=hakym_biyi@yaho]We should be tired of these nemesis that is befalling our "NATION" where cattle rearer proposes and fisherman endorses.[/quote]U almost broke my ribs with laughter with the above.

[quote author=hakym_biyi@yaho]Whereas, they posses the power of turning things around but for the worst in our country. DR. ALFA & IMAM Sanusi should remeber that his policies are against one another
1)TEN DIGIT ACCOUNT NUMBER= Waste of material in the banking industry
2)MERGER & AQUISITION = Mass sacking of ppl
3)CASHLESS POLICY= Stampede in the issuance of small naira notes.ATM failure no small currencies.
4)NEW NOTE N5000 WILL ALSO BE = all of the above and many more problems.

BABA MIMO OLOHUN AGBAYE, SANU FUN WA O LOWO APEJA & ADAERAN[/quote]U came really hard and tough

I was surprised when I saw that U won't be considering marriage from d early part of ur post,I read on,followed the subsequent ones and brot out d ff;

Dimples 316: I turned 29 in June

Okay.

Dimples 316: am still single not worried or bothered about my status. My utmost concern is and has always been to watch out for my parents, take good care of them like they took care of me from infancy to adulthood and simply just give back to them before I lose one of them to the cold hands of death.

I see.You want to take care of ur parents yet U don't want to get married and av kids that will take care of U when U grow old

Dimples 316: I can do this with or without a husband infact I do not need one to.

Now,it is obvious U av a very sketchy and minute knowledge about d usefulness of a man with this statement of urs.So,because,U can take care of ur parents,U don't need a husband. SMH.

Dimples 316: I am not thrilled about it or anxious for it whether it happens or not

This is a contradictory statement to ur argument so far. D statement 'WHETHER IT HAPPENS OR NOT' as clearly shown that ur state of being single is not a personal choice but just situation of things and U wouldn't mind a hubby.[/quote]

Dimples 316: I remian well grounded in the fact that SINGLENESS IS NOT A DISEASE I NEED TO BE CURED FROM & MARITAL STATUS OF BEING MARRIED WILL NOT GUARANTEE MY PASSAGE INTO HEAVEN.

Yes,marriage is not a gaurantee to heaven and U wouldn't be a candidate too if U commit FORNICATION (or are u are a v.gin )and if U are considering raising kids outside wedlock, d question is,Y would U allow someone U don't love or someone U can't/ don't want to get married to ,to sleep with U? What's d point then?[/quote]From ur entire post,it is very easy to conclude d following;

1)U are financially independent.

2)Ur not getting married is more of an attitudinal problem.Solution: Be humble,even though U got enof cash etc.U know Y? Men love humble gurls and not those that always fight for gender superiority and behave as if they can do without a man.That myt av waded off intending suitors from U.

3)U are not happy U are single(no one shuld be anyway) even though U painted a different picture of it.That's an ego problem.U could meet ur future hubby anywhere even here on NL.U never can tell. So,calm down ur ego at times.

4)Ur single statues has affected U psychologically such that U now think marriage is a BAD,DANGEROUS,UNIMPORTANT,UNNECESSSRY ADVENTURE.My dear,29 is not too old.Try and change this mindset of urs.20years from now,U will understand the usefulness of this advice.
SOLUTION: Pls,try and see the following ASAP;

1)A counsellor
2)A psychologist.


#My lil piece of advice#

[quote author=Mrs..Chima]There are hundreds of men that are old as hell and SINGLE....what are their excuses?

None. So let this sexism shit go![/quote]U're just a female chauvinist. Ur comparism is uncalled for.Y not open another thread if u want to compare genders.It is not a crime to read and not make comments so whenever U av nothing important to say on a subject matter,just read and walk.No one is going to flog U.

Rimbaldi: @naturalwaves
pls read the above post. it might give u some insight.
@areaboy
Dead on point! My cuz died in less than 2hrs after his ruptured. They were still on the way to the hospital when he died.

Yeah,I understand that,there could be a lot of twist to d reported news and that was Y I said, 'IF D REPORT IS TRUE' in my post.Areaboy made some good points and d only fault in his analysis was when he concluded that she went for a beauty routine.Inasmuch as we cannot verify d validity of d supposed Rupture,we cannot say she went on a beauty mission as well.Moreover,Patience has never seem like a fashion conscious woman to me before when compared to Stella,maybe I need to study her more. I think she is more interested in d tussle for power and positions . One thing I know is, the truth will definately come out someday.

Rimbaldi: We know u got a medical background, but a little intuitive comic understudy would help u know?

Yes sir,but I actually understood d comic part and that was Y I put a laughing smiley after my comment.U get? I don't av a medical background .I only read stuffs on medicine and I av gone through d surgery before.

The news seems too early,June 2013 is still a long way from now. Moreover,I think Bolt is just concerned about him being said to av worn and played with a Man U jersey before.I'm sure he's gonna take a whole lot of pics with d players,coaching crew,fans etc just to keep as souvenirs.lolz.I don't think he will consider a footballing career at 25.

dlex21: If one child has 12 1/4 sand piles and another has 3 3/4, and you combine them, how many sand piles do you have?

A big pile.

Truman155: maybe ngerian doctors dont know how to cut appendix abi.... This is what will hapen to u if u follow jonathan and co to eat cassava bread