₦airaland Forum

chiogo:
Oh C'mon nene. Did you really have to prove anything to these people?

you're very pretty though.

LOL exactly. I'm sure he's being nice but nobody cares about this nairaland shit unless you have no life.

thanks girl. but yeah i had to prove those idiots wrong. I wanted to show ALL african women are beautiful. East african girls are not better looking than west african girls and west african girls also aren't better looking than east african.

those pics were for princek12 and alqaeda.

me:

i'm the one in the red with the black puffy hair.

If I had a dollar for every time I heard how horn african girls are the most beautiful in african I would be so rich by now. Anyway, I'm not surprised to hear this. African men drool over any women with long hair and light skin. I've seen nigerian girls who are more beautiful than the ones he posted so I don't see what the big fuss is about them. I went to undergrad in the midwest, which has plenty of horn africans, but on average they are not any better looking than other africans. But of course, I'm sure the men just think we west african girls are jealous and wish we looked like them. Typical response from a brainwashed african man.

FL Gators:
Lol do 100% of doctors come out of havard and duke?

Most of the Floridians doctors graduated from UF and UMiami. . . .Miami is a private school, so imagine the debt.

LOL only on TV would you see a lot of goodlooking doctors

That's why I said TOP private schools. Yes, obviously the majority don't come from those schools. Well I don't care I am not taking out ridiculous amounts of loans for my schooling so that's not my problem. But I do agree that there are not too many good looking doctors though. A lot of the medical students here are not goodlooking and they are goning to be doctors soon. However when I was an undergrad, there was one medical student I think he was nigerian, he used to work out and he had a very nice build. He was also very tall. Oooh was he sexy. But that was only one guy. The rest are ususally not good looking. That is why I will not choose a specialty like surgery where you have no life and are always in the hospital. I'll probably choose a specialty like pediatrics or ER where the hours are usually not more than 40 to 50 hours per week. I'm a woman. I need a life. I want time to be able to take care of myself. I want to have time for my husband and kids.

jay bee:
no we r not

if you are a doctor and that is you in the pic, then i guess there are some good looking doctors out there lol,

FL Gators:
First of all, doctors are not all that anymore.

add up their medical school bills, low income (insurance comp. dnt pay much anymore), their debts, and the high possibility of getting sued. . . . .

E se n. . . . .Doctor ko doctor ni. most of  them are ugly anywaz

good looks and brains are a rare combination. but about getting sued it depends on what specialty (i.e. Ob/Gyns).  And there are excellent public medical schools that are not that expensive (for example my school: Mount Sinai). also a lot of top private medical school graduates from schools like harvard and duke don't have ridiculous amounts of debt b/c the schools are rich enough to give a ton of aid.

[quote author=Aloy.Emeka link=topic=332453.msg4665085#msg4665085 date=1254671621]Being a medical doctor does not automatically mean you will be successful.[/quote]You're right, but I'm being positive. And people in the health fields tend to have an easier time finding a secure job even in times of economic crisis. People in business usually have a higher risk of not being successful. But if you get decent grades in medical school and complete a residency at a decent program, you will be fine. Then again it depends on your specialty.

michelin89:
How come only men have been brainwashed by the so called Europeans, since the VAST MAJORITY of African women prefer dark skinned men, except rare exceptions?

That's very true. I also noticed the same preference among African American women as well. Dark skin is considered sexy and beautiful on men but not really on women. I guess is because society places more importance on a woman's looks whereas for men it's their money. However that still doesn't explain the fact that many african/black women are more PHYSICALLY attracted to darker men putting all issues about his wealth and success aside. I find black african men of all shaded attractive from pitch black to yellow. I have a preference for african men, but not for a particular shade. Light skin is not as  desired on men, but there are a few dark girls who prefer light skinned igbo guys and fulani.

[quote author=oyinda. link=topic=331471.msg4664744#msg4664744 date=1254667634]drrionelli,
you don't get the point do you  
we all have freedom of choice yes. duh  the point isn't about changing the freedom of choice. the point is about influencing how you make that choice.
you are making a height comparison. well on average men prefer women shorter than them. but also, on average, men have different heights so logically, one man's idea of shorter will be different from the next guy's.
your idea of tall for example will be different from your friend who is taller or shorter than you.
a tall guy will tend to be with a taller girl etc. with skin tone on the other hand, idea of light skin and dark skin ISN'T relative or differ from man to man.
the definition of light skin or dark skin isn't arbitrary as a matter of fact, there is a general consensus on what qualifies as light skin (rita dominic, beyonce etc) or dark skin (genevieve, jackie appiah etc).
[b]and most men from pitch black to average black tend to prefer (what is generally classified as) light skin. not what is light skin relative to their own shade.

if you compared this to height ([b]like you're trying to do), people will call it a fetish. it is not normal for a 5'10 guy to "prefer" a 6'5 girl. but it is very normal for a pitch black guy to prefer beyonce's shade. that is the norm and that is what the OP is referring to.

this type[/b] of overwhelming "preference"[/b] for light skin isn't natural, even though you are indeed free to choose what you want.

of course you won't base a relationship on your preference. but you will tend to pick your partner based on those preferences. that's why many african women bleach. and of course they will be bright and glowing for the first few years after they start bleaching and will attract many men. the ugly effects show up only a little bit later.

but this isn't just for african men though. they have the same problems in india. all their bollywood stars are fairer and most of their women consume lightening/bleaching products.
coincidence that most of africa and india are former european colonies.  

so the point is about influencing your preference. maybe if there is a different idea of what is considered beautiful, this unnatural preference will disappear.[/quote]very good explanation. you said everything I wanted to say in this post. you clearly see my point. I also like how you pointed out that AFRICAN COUNTRIES AND INDIA WERE ALL EUROPEAN COLONIES. IN OTHER WORDS WE WERE ALL COLONIZED BY A FAIR SKINNED RACE. It's common sense. Why is it that in populations such as India and Africa where the majority are not fair, prefer fair skin??

[quote author=Aloy.Emeka link=topic=332453.msg4664573#msg4664573 date=1254664715]On the other hand, female doctors do not easily get married because of their fervent attitude. Why do they usually have attitude?[/quote]Really? What kind of attitude do you mean? Do you mean they have an attitude that they think they are too independent and educated? Well I hope all men don't have this view. Now I have a question to the men:

Does a women being a doctor make her more attractive to you? Would you want to marry a doctor? I sometimes hear that men don't like women who are too educated b/c they are too independent. I feel like no matter how educated a women is, her role as a wife and mother comes before her career. I don't want to get married now since I'm only in my first year, but I hope to be able to find someone by the time I graduate. I don't want to wait till after my residency, b/c I'd be almost 30 then.

That's very true. I'm in med school now and I always wanted to have a husband who is a doctor as well. However, I'm not saying that they are the only men I would marry. I just want a successful guy, b/c I will be successful.

chic2pimp:
Well, It depends on who and what you call the vast majority. I think we'll have to agree to disagree on that point.

You might have a point had u said that in the majority of fairskin/darkskin relationship,the women are more likely to be the lightskinned partner. However,does this mean that the vast majority of black men prefer lightskinned women? Hell No.

Great point .
No one is saying dark skinned females are less attractive. My point is shouldn't men be allowed to choose who they would like to roll with, Be it light skinned or dark skinned?

Of course they should. I'm not saying that men should not be allowed to choose their women or not choose women fairer than them. However a lot of them are sending out the message that light skinned females are more attractive than dark skinned females. If this were not true, then dark skinned girls would not feel the need to bleach. If it was simply just a preference and not an ingrained mentality than I don't think men's "preferences" for lighter women would be such a big issue."  Although you make other valid points, I still stick to my assertion that the MAJORITY of black men prefer lighter females. Just because a man is with a dark skinned female does not mean that he does not have the belief that lighter is better. Like I said in my first post, I know a man who personally buys bleaching creams for his dark skinned wife. Also there are many men who see their wives bleaching, but don't say anything, because they want their wives to bleach and look lighter. I'm sure if african men had more chances to date and marry women of other ethnicities like arab women for example they certainly would. I use them b/c most of their men don't allow them to marry black men no matter what religion he is. But if other races like them were more willing to allow their daughters to be with black men such as arabs and indians, then many more african men would opt for these women. I'm sure many of them find them more attractive than black women. That is why whenver they become very successful and wealthy they opt to date women of other races with lighter hues since NOW those women's families would not mind them being with a black man.

So basically a lot of black men with dark skinned women (NOT ALL) would opt for a lighter woman if they had the chance (i.e. they were more successful and wealthy). That is why lighter women tend to get more successful men. That is why I still stick to the fact that the VAST MAJORITY of african and black men prefer lighter women.  It doesn't mean that every african guy who finds light skinned women more attractive is going to get one.

@ na2day and chic2pimp

you are right there is nothing wrong with having a preference. but this light skin preference seems to be a MASS PREFERENCE among african and other black men. i find it hard to believe that it's just a coincidence that the vast majority or almost all african men seem to share this same preference for fair skin.

africhika:
nene1, bleaching your skin isn't the answer. go with a man who cherishes your skin tone. never change your body for a man.

while i'm on the fair side, my sis has gorgeous black skin and when we're out 2gether, she gets
all kinds of captivating stares and compliments becuz she wears her skin proudly and it makes her stand out.

it's not just for men, but i want to have a complexion like rita dominic. her complexion is perfect. it is not yellow, but a very light brown and smooth too. i guess i'll just mix the cream with the one i normally use so it can be fair and smooth. nadia has a nice complexion too, but it is not as smooth as rita's. tonto dikeh also has a nice complexion.

posakosa:
there's this stereotype that lighter skinned Niger girls get rich men,  don't know how true this is, but some say that its a trend.


_{maybe the reason why some women bleach}

i don't know about niger. but in gambia that is VERY TRUE. There are virtually no rich men in gambia with dark skinned wives. That is interesting b/c gambians are kinda like senegalese, we tend to be dark. sometimes i wonder where they get these women from. rich gambian men usually prefer light fulani girls and girls mixed with the lebanese. i guess fair girls look better in their nice cars and jewelry. even our own president went all the way to morocco to find a fair skinned arab wife and he is very dark. A lot of senegalese government officials tend to have white wives as well despite all the beauties in senegal. well to do african men seem to like the likes of nadia buari. see she got engaged to a very popular ghanaian football, mike essien. not sure if they are married yet.

africhika:
yeah. this will never change. it'll just drive u CRAZY thinking about it.
so don't

you are right actually. it's been like this for many years so it won't change. i'm just trying to find a bleaching cream that won't burn my skin.

Why do most african men always prefer fair skinned girls as partners, girlfriends, and wives. I know a guy who has four wives and ALL of them are very fair skinned even though he himself is very dark. Another guy I know personally buys bleaching creams for his wife. I have yet to understand this obsession african men have with light skin despite the fact that there are many medium/dark beauties around. I'm not saying light skinned girls should not get married either, but what is the fuss over their skin complexion. I know someone is going to make that lame preference argument again. But let's be realistic it seems like ALMOST ALL african and black men seem to have this SAME PREFERENCE FOR LIGHTER SKIN. Come on. IT IS MORE THAN JUST A PREFERENCE. Some guys purposely seek out fair brides and automatically shun out all other girls who are not light enough. It does not matter how pretty, fit, intelligent, or kind she is. Maybe fair skin alone (not including other features) is automatically a mark of beauty. And yes I know someone else is going to say I'm another dark skinned girl with an inferiority complex, but we can't deny these things happen in our society. If we do have an inferiority complex there is a cause for it. There is a reason why half of african women bleach. So again I want to know, what is it about fair skin that makes men drool. Let me know so I can get a tube of fair and lovely.

what i noticed is that a lot of black men who prefer white women always seem to say it's due to a bad experience with black women. do you have to hate black women in order to like white women? i rarely see a black man who likes white women b/c he just likes them. it is usually b/c black women are this and that. guys like bloodshed always give negative reasons about black women to justify why they like white women. why do you have to explain why you like white women? if you like them then go for it. there is no need to criticize black women for that. there are some white guys who like asian and black women, but you don't hear them putting down white women to justify their preferences.

someone said it before that we black people are messed up and it's true. you do not have to dislike the men or women of your race or bash them just b/c you are attracted to other races. just be with whatever race you want to be with and stop complaining.

merge:
@ poster

Why you asking? Nigerian men gladly marry fat white women.

lol, i guess it's either for paper or they really love the fair complexion.

ibkaye:
Don't think it's the same, as much as some cultures are different, people in a intertribal relationships are likely to have more in common than that of people in an interracial relationship.

It also depends where the people were brought up.

I agree.

No2Atheism:
Seriously she is , I would admit it also took me a while to realise that. Because of my own preference for light-skinned beauties.

But sincerely she is beautiful, she is one of the typical typical dark-skinned beautiful kind of ladies. Hence why i am comfortable using her as an example.


Do I think Alek Wek is as beautiful as Kelly Rowland, off course not. However in my scale of measuring beauty, Alek Wek is actually sincerely averagely beautiful. Its just the darker-skin that does not do it for me

Come on, be honest. Alek Wek is not even near average beautiful. She is not a good example. Besides, she is NOT a typical dark skin beauty. Most dark-skinned girls do not have bald heads. I've seen some gorgeous senegalese girls who are just as dark. Why do people like to use alek wek as an example of dark skin beauty when she is very ugly? Use someone like genevieve nnaji or something please.

No2Atheism:
1. Wats ur own sef , did someone send u to destroy my fantasy (just kidding  ).

2. I know about the boob (hence why i keep commenting negatively about it). If it is true she has had a nose job, skin lightening treatment then she just lost my respect and attraction, simply because i don't do fake women.

3. How many times do i have explain to you that[b] i do not equate light skin with beauty[/b], its just my preference that my babe must be lighter than i am , even if just a little shade lighter (i am not that dark either so don't get it twisted).

If it is true that I equated light skin with beauty then why the heck do u think I have a problem with Beyonce, Halle Berry and White women in general in terms of beauty.

4. Kelly Rowland without all the artificialities that you have mentioned is light enough for me, the kind of dark-skin that i don't like is the Alek Wek kind of dark skin, cus that is certainly darker than i am. And i don't do ladies that are darker than i am.

So would you automatically not bother with a girl if she is darker than you despite that she may be pretty and have a good personality? I'm not saying very dark like alek wek, but just darker than you. I understand your preference is to have a woman lighter than you, but why must she be lighter than you? Would you not look good together if the girl is darker? it's interesting you said this, b/c in most black couples i see, the woman is almost always lighter. I rarely see black couples where the woman is a bit darker than the husband. Not to say they don't exist, but it is usually the other way around. I know you'll say is just a preference, but it seems like an overwhelming majority seem to have this so-called "preference".

Sasha009:
@ nene

you have made a great point. Thanks for the input,
but you left a one valid point which is the most important and basis of my topic,

You didn't ask me to choose what will make me happy, (other posters did). In the long run, being with him makes me happier than anything, this is where everything is confusing
I appreciate my parents effort in trying to fix me up with potential men but what if the feelings is not there? You cant force love

Yeah I feel like there is one person out there for everyone. So maybe no matter what great qualities those yoruba guys have, i guess none of them are your soulmates since you don't feel a connection with them. There are many guys with great attributes, but that doesn't mean every girl would be happy with them. Yes you can't help who you fall in love with and you shouldn't. Besides, it's not like you don't like your culture or yoruba guys, I guess your soulmate probably isn't a yoruba. The best I can give is my opinion, which could be biased since I connect more with african guys. But good look with choosing a husband and I hope you will make the right choice. Pray about it as well, since God knows more than the rest of us anyway lol, He already knows who your soulmate is. So pray to him to guide you to make the right choice.

Do you guys think in marrying into a different tribe the cultural differences are not going to be as huge as if one married out of your race? Or do you think the cultural differences are just as great in both?

Hi everyone,

I want to listen to some naija songs on youtube. You music like that of 9ice and the like. However, I can't search them because i don't know the names. Can you let me know some of the names of some upbeat naija music. Thanks.

Sasha009:
@nene,
In regards to your questions,
Yes I did ask my parents, but they just insisted they would feel more comfortable seeing me married to a Nigerian Yoruba guy. They have tried unsuccessfully to hook me up with lots of family friends, potential black yoruba guys who re ding really well, but I always turn down their offer politely. This upsets my dad a lot, and he is even more strict and more inclined to making sure I still end up with a black guy.

But I always counter his words, and try to say good things about white guys too. My dad uses an old example which probably due to what they hear and watch in the media.

One day he said " If you upset a white guy, one day he could just shoot you in the head, and then you re gone" Like that . They seem to believe white men have temper or a case of slight mentality, lol that they tend to do bad things if you upset them, which is soooooooooo not true.

Also, he thinks once i get married to a white guy, then he will keep me away from Africa, and not allow me to visit them anymore. But again i tried to make them understand this is also not true (in my case), because my bf is very interested in africa

Besides the one about shooting you in the head, I must admit your dad made some very valid points. It would be easier to connect to your culture with a naija guy. He would be more eager to go to africa with you than a white guy no matter how much the white guy is into africa. besides, like davidlyan said, the white guy could just be interested know in order to get you but it might not last long. But a naija guy would always be interested in his homeland.

But out of curiosity, why did you refuse the yoruba guys, especially since they are successful and share the same culture with you? Well at least your parents are not forcing you to marry a yoruba guy. At least they are not making it into an arranged marriage situation. Also, be careful b/c you do not want to keep rejecting these guys until it's too late. It's hard finding a spouse so at least you have many men willing to marry you. Do you want to marry a white man and hurt the bond between you and your family or do you want to marry a guy from your culture who is successful as well and be at peace with your family? Do you think it's worth it? What if you marry a white guy and it doesn't last, but it would be after you already upset your family. I'm not saying that marrying into the same culture is pure bliss easier, but I do feel you do understand each other better. Also, if you marry a white guy, how easy would it be to teach your kids yoruba? You would have to speak english at home b/c that is the only language your husband will know. It is easier to teach your children your culture when you and your husband have the same culture.

Is it b/c you don't find naija men physically attractive? Why do you feel like you relate to white men better than men from your culture? Sorry for asking so many questions, but I just think you should really think about it. Don't get carried away by dating. Marriage is not all about just romance.