₦airaland Forum

mugnmuffin:
Dear Nairalanders,
I have an issue that has been on my mind for weeks now. My fiancé and I have been dating for over three years. I love him and he loves me too. We are physically attracted to each other. We’re both catholic but since I graduated, during my service year I gave my life to Christ, got saved and left the Catholic Church. So I’ve been a Pentecostal Christian since then. He on the other hand is still catholic. I subtly try to nudge him to consider getting saved, i.e acknowledging Christ as lord and savior and becoming born again but he is content with his laidback Christian life.

Earlier this year, he asked to meet my parents and I let him. My parents like him especially because my younger sis is married and they have been waiting for me too. They’re glad I’ve someone. However, after the introduction,I regret it. I’m now certain that he’s not the one. I think about my spiritual life and how lukewarm he is about the things of God, I think about kids and how we’ll raise the, with such differing views about God and I’m discouraged. I feel like I’m settling because he checks all the boxes on the checklist of physical attributes. Another mistake I made is, I didn’t pray about this decision and that worries me because anything that involves him,I just act with pausing to ask God, but I always ask God about other aspects of my life. So it’s like my associating with him is a minus for my spiritual life and that’s a huge cause for concern.

At this point, I want to tell my parents I am not convinced it’s him but I’m afraid of the disappointment this will cause. *sigh* I’ll appreciate your thoughts, comments, criticisms...

Ufedolove:
I see why you can't stoop so low... Cos you are already too low to stoop any lower.

omolola100:
My mother advice me never to look for a rich man who is well do whenever i'm set to get married.
she said i should marry a man that we will both start our life from the foundation, according to my mum, she said it is better to suffer with man to acquire wealth, than to go for a ready made soup.

Looking at the way things are going now, do you think a woman will now stoop so low and marry a poor man that is trying to make ends meet? Although, money is not love, but why would a parent wish her daughter to marry a poor man, i am begining to see my mum as a bad mother who does'nt wish me well.
Is it advisable i follow my mothers advice? I should stay in SURULERE instead of OLORUNSOGO.

truthisgood:
Please send the pics of your lips for better understanding, Meanwhile you have to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour then your eyes will open for you to know that God gave you a wonderful lips for a purpose.

lastchild:
do you know whether Jay-Z's big lips is too small to compare to the op's

Mrmacc:
I av a big lips and i av been shamed many times for it,it's beginning to affect my self esteem and I'm not comfortable with it.
Is there any way to reduce the size ..

Babes no be problem oo as baba get small raba

maxwelltony:
Hi guys

Please i really need your sincere advice concerning my relationship, we have been dating for the past two years, but honestly speaking i am not enjoying the relationship, i dont know what is wrong with my man, at times, he would travel for three month without giving me any notice, and throughout that time, his number will be switch off, for the past two years that we have started dating, he has done that for over 5times, and i am getting confuse if i am not in the wrong hand, he wouldnt give me any good excuse and i am getting fed up with him, i dont want to break up with him all because we have gone a long way, but with his attitude, i dont think i can cope again, time is going...

Please i want the whole house to advice me because i dont know how to cope again, he has gone again and dont knw when he will be coming back.

RealSolution001:
Although nobody can predict the future but there are people who deliberately walk into unfavourable condition. As a writer of this article, age wise I'm due for marriage but I don't give a damn about it not until I'm able to get a good job that can guarantee me at least one bedroom. Besides, the path Nigeria is tilting towards economically demands one to use his head sufficiently when doing things that has future implications. I live in one room apartment as years now since I graduated from the University I haven't been able to find a good paying job. In this compound, we share toilet/bathroom with no specific place to call kitchen. You just have to create a space for your cooking and the gas cylinder returned inside after cooking. In fact, looking at the structure of the building, it wasn't designed to accommodate people in family setting but singles but today, agents and the lawyer have brought so many married people into the place.

Living in one room as family

There are four different married (legally or illegally) people living in the compound as thus:

Family A has husband, wife, 3 children and two relative all living inside I room.

Family B has husband, wife, 3 children (currently the wife is pregnant for the fourth child) and a relative inside one room.

Family C has husband, wife, 2 children (currently the wife is pregnant for the 3rd child) and also a relative living inside one room while

Family D has husband, wife, two children and two relatives and mother in-law living in one room.
Crazy right? While this article is not in anyway intended to make jest of anybody but what I don't seem to understand is people living inside one room and still give birth to multiple of children into same. I mean are these people comfortable with their condition? Are they comfortable with poverty? To me, I think it's crazy. How do they cope? No privacy between the husband and the wife. Even the sex that led to their wives' current pregnancy, how, where and when did it happen when they have absolutely no privacy of their own. Also, these people can disturb. Is it because I'm not married? Always either asking for one thing or the other. "Abeg make I use your gas boil water for Garri. My own just finish". "Abeg you get Garri?" "Abeg borrow me 2k I go give you back". "Abeg u get Maggi?" "Abeg give me your toothpaste". "Abeg make I use your detergent" "abeg give me small pepper" and almost anything else you can think of. Haba! Habatically!! I'm tired please.

In my submission, I think government as a matter of urgency should do something about birth/population control in the country. Already, one of the factors that have given birth to the present state of Nigeria is over population which has led to high rate of unemployment, poverty and consequently, crime. Also, people should try to attend some level of financial comfortability before delving into family way. Me that is not married, no be say I stupid but things must be done right. May God bless me with a good job or capital for business so I can pack out of this place in no time.

Photo source: Google

Mrskillz1:
I am from a family of three. I have two brothers. One older and the other younger than me so I'm the only girl in my family.

I grew up seeing my Mom mad.
By my teen age, I got admission into Nnamdi Azikiwe University alongside my elder brother who was to study Engineering. By the time I was in my finals, my brother was getting ready for IT. One day, his roommate sent for me, he said they couldn't sleep the night before because my brother was talking to himself. Before we knew what was happening, my brother was getting violent and so we took him home and he never got back to finish school.
I proceeded with my education and finished. Went for NYSC. While serving the nation, My Mom died. When I got home, she'd been buried.
But my brother was still mad.

I later got job, took my brother to a Psychiatric hospital and the doctor after examining him said he is Schizophrenic. He was asked to stay in the hospital.
I paid. He then stayed there for one month. When I came to visit him, he pleaded with me to take him home that he didn't like it there.

So I took him home. Every month, I buy drugs for him and he gets injected. He usually puts up a fight but with the help of my younger brother, neighbors and a certain nurse, he receives the injection, forcefully and against his will.
Often times, he pleads with me not to inject him, the very time I obliged him, he scattered things, didn't allow the neighborhood sleep, talked throughout some nights and wouldn't eat sometimes. He looked really sick then but with the injection, one will hardly know he's not normal.
I told him that I won't let him miss his injection ever again.

Now, on Monday, my younger brother woke up and was unusually quiet. He normally wakes up and begins to play music with his phone or he will turn to football channel and watch until I leave for work. But I didn't go to work on Monday and I noticed he was quiet, then I asked him why he's quiet. He didn't respond. After some hours, I asked my Dad if he feels he's okay, My Dad said that he wants to be quiet and that I should let him be.

Then, that night, around 4am, my brother began to talk. He was shouting and some of the things he said were not coherent. He talked out of point. I and my Dad, with my elder brother surrounded him and I couldn't help crying when my Dad was cautioning him to keep quiet and he refused.
Neighbours thought it was my elder brother's voice they'd heard that night but by the time they heard in the morning that it was my younger brother, they visited my Dad in the evening. By then, my brother was still talking and even burnt his clothes yesterday.
My Dad got a few guys to chain him because he was violent yesterday when I left the house.
I know the problem is spiritual. I have prayed, fasted for my elder brother and now this!
I'm so unhappy.

Can someone suggest a place I can take my two brothers to so they can be cured, please.

Skmoda360:
This man will not become president no matter I swear......I pray the spending goes in vain....Amen.

familier:
Good day RomanceLanders
I just clocked 20 today

what are those advice you'll render to us in our Early or mid twenties...What are those mistakes or bad decisions that you'll never want us to make so as not to have regrets in life... I'm currently doing my ND2 in a state polytechnic with the thought of dropping at this level, I'm interested in leaning building construction.

You're advice and insults are welcomed

uncleck:
If you invested in MBA, count your losses and move on. It happened with MMM and life did not end. Chymall is next in line.

OfeAchi:
BACKGROUND:

I had a decent job before I met her and I was responsible for all the decisions I took, which mostly led to favourable outcomes.
However when I met her and began a relationship, I wasn't having the freedom I needed. Any decision I wanted to take without her authorization always ended badly. For example there was a period I wanted to jointly rent an apartment with a male friend of mine. She strongly opposed this but I still went ahead to pay rent. Unfortunately for me, within four months my friend had some issues with landlord and we were both evicted from the apartment. (although I got compensated)

Another instance was when I got paid some bonuses from company and decided to invest in some crypto projects during their ICOs (in 2017). I did some market analysis of these crypto projects before my decision to invest, only for her to advice me against it. She said we should instead, use the money to start farming. I didn't listen to her and went ahead to invest. THE RESULT: the investment that was supposed to take me to the moon now became more worthless than tissue paper! I shed tears because of this.

I now decided to get rid of her, but all plans of mine proved abortive. The more I tried to get her out of my life, the more we were brought together. Can you believe that the day I finally proposed to her was the very same day I tried to make out with an old girlfriend?

A friend of mine went to consult an ifa priest, who told him that my fiance has a cloud of good fortunes around her. But I don't believe in those spiritual mumbo-jumbos! I was determined to leave her. This made me begin applying for jobs in other states and towns, but nothing came forth. I even went for interview/test but didn't scale through. Some weeks later, she told me that she wasn't in support of me getting job in another town (she says she was scared of losing me).

Did you know? the time I decided to remove the thoughts of leaving her from mind and fully accept her into my life, was the time that I finally got a better job in another city!

MARRIAGE
We got married in 2019 and I was of the mindset that since she may be an ogbanje, therefore things would work in my favour and I would become a millionaire very quickly, but that's not the case.

Since marriage, any decision I take without her approval always leads to disaster!
I wanted to invest in a partnership deal and told her about it but she disapproved and said I should save the money instead. I went ahead to invest and I lost 400k! Same for other decisions in the house, the outcome was always negative whenever I don't heed her advice.

I hate all this! I'm a full grown man. Why should my life be based on the decisions of a woman? I feel like I'm no longer in control of my life.
I'm about to take a car loan from my company in order to escape this constant public commute and trekking but she has vehemently disapproved, that I should instead save for another year or two before buying car. But I still won't listen to her! If the loan ends in a disaster, I have decided that I would abandon this marriage and relocate to another country. A country where voodoo and religious mumbo-jumbo do not exist, so that I can be in full control of my life!

.......PS: we have a year old baby girl. Maybe I could be sending monthly upkeep from this new country I intend to relocate to.

Able readers, is my final decision a good one?

GreenWire:
abeg make Una close this thread.. cus Nowadays human dey unpredictable.

obowunmi:
They should have kidnapped ElRufai's children and grandchildren.

Katcall:
Late-comer! What took you so long?

wale377:
Iyabo Ojo tell daughter to marry early.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E1OCcTbBFIE

In the video above, she said she wants her daughter to be engaged at 23, married at 24, and have a child at 25
As she is a fan of early marriage

Quoting her


https://www.instagram.com/p/CN5Kv-9HLZ5/?igshid=11exkfziz3yvj

ebuka10box:
been dating this girl for a while ,we have had our ups and downs but we settled. I plan to get married to her when I get back by God's grace . I noticed she wants to get married by all means,note:she is 27.
today ,I wanted to try her loyalty and submissiveness. I decided to give her number to a friend ,guess what ..... she denied me , I dont feel bad at all but tired of searching....
omo this girl use me play gg2.5 lolz...... imma take a break rn