₦airaland Forum

ClassicQueen:
As a woman what do you do if almost all the women and wives in a family you married have beef for you simply because you are prettier, more educated, lucky, intelligent, younger and dress better? This is my dilemma

Even some of his brothers are not left out I am afraid they are beginning to have grudges and gossip about me what will happen when I start bringing in kids? Please experienced couples and women I really need your advice on how to deal with this. Thanks

........simply because you are prettier, more educated, bla bla bla how funny.
the truth is your in laws can't hate you for no reason there is definitely a cause of it and from your point I don't think it is from the above you wrote, I think the problem is actually from you.
if you can't change your ways now and know how to live with your inlaws peacefully instead of claiming prettier and more lucky you might continue to have issues with them at your own peril.
and know this dont think you know you husband he will always love and care for you and support you, know that this are his family they have know him even before you ever imagine of meeting or date him, I know this maybe sound harsh but if you don't change your ways with time your husband may pick your side at first but later he will always be with his mom and family especially mom, then he will start thinking of cheating or changing you and if by then you have a child or children for him that is when really trouble start,he might make you a single mother or try convincing you to please accept the young girl he just impregnated that his family likes.
so the ball is in your court, settle with your husband family and drop your more prettier and intelligent or keep forming" I am his legal wife accept it or not or i can't change you have to love me for who I am" like I said he back you for sometime and go back to his family in the long run especially his mom,we men don't joke with our mothers.
this is a fact

I know we may have people that don't see thing from my view but I think Juliana was just been ungrateful to funke.
from what she wrote above I can deduce that funke is actually the bedrock of Juliana success which she also confirms. if this is so I see no big deal in what she is claiming she did for funke, she is still an upcoming actress all what she is claiming she did are normal hustle and bustle an upcoming is suppose to pass through, why didn't she complain at the beginning of her career when funke was doing all this for her, why didn't she complain when funke wanted to help her pay her mum' s health bill but now that she is a celebrity she thinks funke should pay her double,this is just a simple real life example of an ingrate.
it is people like this that tend to discourage rich from helping other because they will think if I help this poor person won't it backfire

Noblesoul123:
Who cares?

Maybe the guy couldn't put up with her feminist trash anymore.

Anyway, its her life since the new trend now is to get married and quickly separate from your spouse.

Meanwhile, ......

in as much as females wont remove this ideology of they want to be equal or feminism attitude from their life, I don't think marriages would last a decade.
we even have some of them on nairaland here that thinks what a man can do, a woman can do better, how funny.

sexybbstar:
Okay, thank you ma. Everybody is entitled to his or her opinions, That's my opinion and you just stated yours......AND IT'S APPRECIATED.

OLAJADON:
I know this may sound funny but a man is always a man while a woman is also a woman, As a Lady you may easily fool some gullible guys that can't control their sexual urge that doesn't make you smart, a real man know what he want and isn't deceived easily.
those guys you think you are outsmarting might just be after your body, although some you may give other you may not so with time it will begin to tell on your body while a man still remain without any sign of sexual escapades.
No matter how you paint the situation or how much you want to make yourself feel good that you and a man are equal, Life has always given we men upper hand learn to live with this bitter truth.
Also I guess you are still young that is why you are talking from this point of view with time you will see the definition of exactly what I mean

when your fellow women start to see things from the above point of view maybe that is when we will start having less divorce rate, some may even foolishly want to go head to head with a man, how pathetic.
I guess maybe most of those bashing you are still very young which haven't actually have much experiences that is why they are forming Chris brown, with time life has it ways of organising it own tutorial class.

lovelygurl:
Don't mind them, they think they are smart but those guys are sooooooo dumb. I swear they are extremely easy to fool. I know exactly what to say for them to shower me with praises, the thing is they will be lies


And I am not as desperate as the girl and I also loooove using my brain.

I know this may sound funny but a man is always a man while a woman is also a woman, As a Lady you may easily fool some gullible guys that can't control their sexual urge that doesn't make you smart, a real man know what he want and isn't deceived easily.
those guys you think you are outsmarting might just be after your body, although some you may give other you may not so with time it will begin to tell on your body while a man still remain without any sign of sexual escapades.
No matter how you paint the situation or how much you want to make yourself feel good that you and a man are equal, Life has always given we men upper hand learn to live with this bitter truth.
Also I guess you are still young that is why you are talking from this point of view with time you will see the definition of exactly what I mean

subtlemee:
Dear Nairalanders..this is my first thread and it stems from misery

I've been in this relationship going to two(2) years now and we are deeply in love and planning to get married this year and my introduction is coming up soon but I'm having this serious issue I need help to deal with...

We all know there's no relationship without its hurdles,frictions and tensions but each time this happens my man keeps malice which can run from days into weeks, anytime we quarrel and I try talking to him later probably to apologise he'll feign more anger and i'll leave him and stay miserable till whenever he decides to end the malice he'll come kneeling or asking his relatives or friends to call and apologise on his behalf..

i'll take this decision not to talk to him again but when once I open my door and see him kneeling I go all weak and accept his apologies and it won't take up to a week or two again something will happen and he'll start ignoring me again...

Please help and advice a miserable fellow nairalander on how to deal with this situation now that it's still early,we've not spoken since Friday and it could be worse after marriage

the guy loves you, he is just been immatured. i think you should see a councellor and be careful with the way you will invite him to the counsellor's place, he might feel insulted

NwaAmaikpe:
Hypocrites...

Because it was him trapped in traffic....will he have done the same if he was on an opposite lane and the other lane had traffic.

Nonsense.. Denrele's legs are even fatter than his

Why are you a sadist?

uninvited:
My closest friend in school broke up with his girlfriend like 2 months ago because "there were more fishes in the ocean " according to him. After the breakup she was broken. I offered her comfort, was there for her and constantly checked on her as being a nice guy. One thing led to another and everything went too far between I and his ex. She asked me out and I had to play along. The problem is I don't know how long we can hide this from my friend. Though I feel she's using me to get back at my friend and the relationship might still end. I'm scared that he'll find out later on. I'm just a nice guy in a whole lot of mess because he'll see me as a backstabber and I can't just say no to his ex. I'm confused

the brother code says your friend girl or ex is a no no

fade00:
My moving in was as a result of, my parents and siblings live in ikorodu that's where my dad built his house but we've another house at ogba where my dad comes to once in a while if he has a contract at Ikeja or outside its a big duplex I decided to stay there instead of ikorodu but an uncle of mine needed a place so he came there and my aunt too but she travels a lot it's just my uncle n I in the house and my bf doesn't live far from the hpuse at ogba hence why i'm living with him since it's just my uncle in the house. My mum knows him she doesn't know I live with him all the time to her it's the usual visit

I know as a lady, age is not by your side but from your story this guy is sure to start sleeping around and when this happens
1) it is either he infect you with disease
2) or he get tired of you I.e he will soon start giving you attitude then with these the relationship is doomed to fail.
so the choice is your, it is either you expect any of the above to happen soon or if you can't contain it then use the exit door.
Also know that a guy leave you now or you leaving a guy doesn't guaranty your world will end, so live and enjoy your life some guys ain't worth the stress. you are dealing with a Bleep boy

from your write up the girl has already assume you guys are already dating even without you asking the question that is why
1. she told you about other guys hitting on her
2. turn those guys down
3. gave you her body, to a female sex is more than just the pleasure, it is everything unlike we men.
if you also love her and you sure it not for the sex, continue the relationship and don't tarnish that firm man image you have built in her head that will make her love you more.
the part where you feel jealous that other guy are after her is you been human, it is a normal feeling. love this girl with your heart but use your head when reasoning.

from your write up the girl has already assume you guys are already dating even without you asking the question that is why
1. she told you about other guys hitting on her
2. turn those guys down
3. gave you her body, to a female sex is more than just the pleasure, it is everything unlike we men.
if you also love her and you sure it not for the sex, continue the relationship and don't tarnish that firm man image you have built in her head that will make her love you more.
the part where you feel jealous that other guy are after her is you been human, it is a normal feeling. love this girl with your heart but use your head when reasoning.

memories1:
Your message is good, but your title is warped. Marriage is a privilege to both men and women. While men might find it easier to remarry after a broken one, there is still this pervasive negativity attached to such men as those 'who couldn't maintain a marriage'.
Perhaps you haven't been acquainted with a man saddled with a bad marriage, experiencing their frustration would remind you that marriage is a privilege to both genders. Always look at both sides of the coin so you don't come across as a sexist.

Toks2008:
Tayo I agree but you must understand that the way the world sees a male divorcee is not the same with the female.

In 8 out of 10 cases,a male divorcee with children could still marry a never married lady with no child while a female divorcee with children will most likely end up with a widower, a married man or a male divorcee with children while never married guys mostly do hit and run.

Only young female divorcees without children are likely to be luckier.

there is enough point in what toks is saying above except if you don't want to accept the truth which is bitter, a man has either little or nothing to loss in a relationship compared to a woman.

greatwomenworld:
True,thank you. when can one ask ?

you welcome,I think that question actually is irrelevant, it like you saying when should you ask a goat to eat the cassava you gave it, the answer is instinct.
when the man think you are marriage worthy he will pope the question, although we have some guy that don't value family or a woman's time, they prefer enjoying the woman till Jesus comes without putting a ring on her hand, so I guess that is on you to differentiate the good eggs from the bad ones, but believe me , when you find a responsible guy you don't need to ask him for marriage, if he sees you as worth he will be the one begging for your hand.
everybody wants an asset not liability

greatwomenworld:
Maybe there is something single ladies are missing .
perhaps they are doing the right things for the wrong guys
How long should one date before a guy man up and takes the necessary steps.
Just yesterday i was having a chat with an older woman who told me to "always ask the guy weather he wants to marry me before deciding to date him". She also bragged about how she made sure her daughter got married before 25. Now she is happily married with three kids at 32.
she might be right but i feel its a little bit embarrassing and desperate to ask a guy such question, a guy one is still getting to know.
i know there are a lot of married men here, who are happily married and they love their wives endlessly.
please you might be saving a single lady out there with your insightful comments
and also wives, what were the qualities you display that made him pop the question.
im not referring to couples getting married because she got pregnant o...

i have seen older spinster in their late 30s with authentic dating experience that cannot be quantified still uncle never come marry them but they have professionals certificate in dating and marriage advice... wetin dey happen?

don't ever ask a guy if he is going to marry you at the beginning of a relationship, every guy answer will always be yes I would also it shows desperation in a lady and a sharp guy could use that to is advantage

I hate when people don't like to think with their head but prefer exposing their yansh for the public to see.
you too read what you wrote above and give yourself adequate advice you think you need

Mofpearl:
She can wear trousers at home and wear something more covering outside.

thumbs up

Freewoman:
Muslim girls do wears trousers already, are you a leaner?

this doesn't answer his question, he said is it bad for Muslim girls to wear trouser, you answer should be on what the Quran and sunnah says not giving answer based on self interest.

it such a pity how women act these days.
I swear if these goes on, women will be on the losing part, the op is a good man and he decide to be faithful to a girl but with this experience he have do you think he would want to fall victim of this in another relationship.
I don't understand how a women will have a steady guy that love her and still be looking for one guy(because he is abroad) that is probably sleeping with white chicks and still be daydreaming about him all because of his foreign goodies and status.

this is one of the reasons why I can't blame fvck boys because what the importance of thinking you have a committed relationship when another guy can just sweep her off her feet, it not worth it at all

lajoshua:
Pain? stopping using deflection psychology. Its you all that is pained, that's why the idea of a DNA test irks you. So you think a cheating woman actually pains a man. Its a man who is a fool that would allow one weak thing called a woman to play him. Me raise child that is not mine? you think I'm interested in marrying you all, you all are just for fvcks we fvck you that's what we do, we don't marry Nigerian women we fvck them.
.
They'll come here be claiming tough, you won't be the first woman to cry in a marriage and you would definely not be the last.
You all are fvcktards who do the will of us who have got the cash, see them claiming strong on social media. Bloody weak things!!! we will see now. shebi you can cheat. We will see. Bloody fools!! whose ticket of a better life is a man, are now here forming tough.

guy you wicked o, shey you wan kill d girl ni.
@topic
both men and women know that in a relationship women are more vulnerable no matter how strong they think they are, nature has defined them as a weak species so please leave her to continue given her opinion with time if she is not married now when she experience like 3or 4 heartbreak or she is getting close to 35 without a steady guy she will comprehend every message you trying to pass across.

OKANGPRECIOUS:
You should equally know that some babies are exchanged in the hospital immediately after birth when the woman is not yet conscious of her self by dubious Doctors/Nurses who make deal with families that want a particular sex of baby.

In that case, who do you blame

this is myopic view
situations like this are rare, what I expected you to advocate for is cheating should be curbed in our society either from men or women then there would be no need for DNA.

especially Glo I don't understand their network these days.

note:- I actually don't have issue with morning preachers at least others have been coming before but they use this red and white hand microphone, this current pastor actually brought a concert speaker.
God save him I would have beaten him this morning but I don't want situation when media will pose it as"a Muslim beat a pastor because he was preaching in the morning"

my experience this morning.
Although I am a Muslims but with posting this online some people won't see the sense in what I am saying but will still insist on thinking of out of context.
I woke up late this morning for my sahur meal for the days' fasting but what couldn't make me sleep is this early morning pastors that are found of using microphone and speaker to preach although other have been coming but this particular one is different, the speaker he brought was that used for a concert so loud that no one could sleep and it was as early as 4:30am, I wonder why people try to disturb the peace of other all because of religion.
I know some will come and start labelling Muslims with name but you can't use a Muslim attitude to judge a whole religion,I was not the only one that complained both christians and muslims but the problem was people were scared to go and meet the man because of hearsay
Another experience, last week Sunday it was even a Christian this time that went to throw bottles on the roof a church all because they couldn't let him have a day nap.
Now, please how can someone report this kind of issue because I don't want to involve the Nigerian police we all know where it will end if they are involved, I don't want a situation where punch will start saying a Muslims disturbed a church programme without giving the details to the society so please how can someone report this issue to the authority without sounding like a nuisance.
criticism is allowed

holuwashaun:
Say I am not something original among the messanger..... I.e. I am neither the first messenger to be sent nor am I bringn something different from other Messengers (my predecessors). Get an English Qur'an or Read the Tafsir of each Surah to understand the context surrounding the revelation of each verse.. What he brought wasn't new. Every prophet came to tell the world about God and that He be worshipped alone and associate no partners with him..

Allah Says "He begets no one (son) neither was he begotten (Mother) and He Has no equivalent".... So our Illah has no begotten Son.

FYI.....Google on Tafsirs or inquire from the Scholars of Islam. The English transliteration is a summary. It doesn't give full details about what led to the revelation....... Same way you attend Church/ Bible Study to av a comprehensive understanding and not just following what you're able to interpret into....

please tell him to educate himself and he should stop allow how the west portray Islam brainwash him, ignorance won't be an excuse on the last day.

jhidey08:
when someone is idle U'll know dem easily. Always doing things to displease others. Don't mind him

his hatred for Islam is making him to misbehave, I pray he doesn't die as an unbeliever because his punishment will start right from his grave where at least he will spend more than a thousand years.

MakeWeTalk:
if this were your last ramadam, I'd recommend you change to Jesus.

Mohammed the best muslim & the prophet of Islam did not
know he would make heaven.

Sura 46:9 "I am not something original among the messengers,
NOR DO I KNOW WHAT WILL BE DONE WITH ME OR WITH YOU(MUSLIMS).


Jesus on the other hand promises heaven to anybody who believes in Him

John 3:
16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

17 For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved.

18 HE THAT BELIEVETH ON HIM IS NOT CONDEMNED: BUT HE THAT BELIEVETH NOT IS CONDEMNED ALREADY, BECAUSE HE HATH NOT BELIEVED IN THE NAME OF THE ONLY BEGOTTEN SON OF GOD.


Now if mohammed is not saved, what hope do muslims have?

Ramadan is in the holy Quran like very compulsory practice of a Muslims, is Christianity in the bible what makes you so sure that Christianity is the way of God.

the reason why ladies love bad boys is because they are adventurous and spontaneous. And these are enough to control a woman emotion without she able to think straight.

babyboy4every1:
Ask any question, i should be able to answer with my little experience and a lot of research.

what about market delivery, how are you going about it?

I know some people might not agree to my take about this but players like higuian,cavani,benzema,giroud are not world class strikers, they are just luck to be playing for a big team

Madrid will defend that title, although juventus defence is strong but their forward is poor. people like cuadrado and higuian are no match for personality like Ramos pepe or varane, in Madrid forward we have the likes of isco,James Vazquez and current world best cr7.
my prediction 3-1 in favour of Madrid, ronaldo to score

cristianisraeli:
well i got your point and what am saying is...those bastards should learn to zip up and control themselves thats all am saying..it should not be the ladies fault and i take it..you think the uncovered meat is to be blamed right?no the cat should have the blame

yea the cat should be blame but imagine if the meat was not open would the cat even know there is anything inside the point.
naturally, we men are move by what we see, it is only the disciplined ones that put their emotion in check