₦airaland Forum

emmysenior: No matter how you'd try to cook the tortoise, the meat no go done. Mtcheeeww...

Lol... na to chop dey ur mind

bregeard: nice bu funny fact...as from 2day,anywhere mess catchme i go release am ni oo....dnt care no
more....lols

Beware of what you share on FB!

My friend got the n sms like this evening, pls peeps, is it real?

NAME: Olumide
LOCATION: Ondo
QUALIFICATION: B.A, Mass Communication
SKILLS: Analytical, creative, investigative and interpretative writing, as well as news writing and reporting.
WHERE I CAN WORK: Any relevant organisation; including media house, government establishment and private companies.
CONTACT: 08065135464
Emman212@gmail.com

If you didn't apply and you got the mesg, it's def a scam... But if you applied and perhaps sent ur CV to numerous email addresses and you can't figure out which it is, then you better star start digging...

Hillaco: All the vacancy na for Lagos, na only lagos people dey for Nairaland?

I tire o

[quote author=Adeniyi A.]if you are in the habit of suppressing fart, in the long you are going to have difficulties releasing in the future, this is one of the common reasons for protruding stomach.
so next time that natural gas is coming, never hesitate to let it out, if it require excusing yourself from the crowd, pls do. you'll be doing yourself a great favor. Nuff said
[/quote]Noted.

[quote author=big-t]Fp straight btw, where is the guy that dumped his gf because she farted[/quote]Lolz D;

[quote author=big-t]Fp straight btw, where is the guy that dumped his gf because she farted[/quote]Lolz D; D;

Passing gas may be embarrassing for most of us, but it might make you feel better to know that it's one of the most common bodily functions of all time. Everyone does it, from Halle Berry to the Queen of England. In fact, the word "fart" is one of the oldest words in the English language!

Read on to discover more fascinating facts about about cutting the cheese.

What Is A Fart, Exactly?

Farts are caused by trapped air, which can come from many sources. Some of it is air that we have swallowed while chewing or drinking. Some air is caused by gas seeping into our intestines from our blood, and some gas is produced by chemical reactions in our intestines or bacteria living in our guts.

A typical fart is composed of about 59 percent nitrogen, 21 percent hydrogen, 9 percent carbon dioxide, 7 percent methane and 4 percent oxygen. Only about one percent of a fart contains hydrogen sulfide gas and mercaptans, which contain sulfur, and the sulfur is what makes farts stink.

Farts make a sound when they escape due to the vibrations of the rectum. The loudness may vary depending on how much pressure is behind the gas, as well as the tightness of the sphincter muscles

Why Do Farts Smell Bad?

The more sulfur-rich your diet is, the more terrible your farts will smell. Some foods contain more sulfur than others, which is why eating things like beans, cabbage, cheese, soda, and eggs can cause gas that will peel the paint off the walls.

People Pass Gas About 14 Times Per Day

The average person produces about half a liter of farts every single day, and even though many women won't admit it, women do fart just as often as men. In fact, a study has proven that when men and women eat the exact same food, woman tend to have even more concentrated gas than men.

If a person were to fart continuously for 6 years and 9 months, they would produce gas with the equivalent energy of an atomic bomb.

Farts Have Been Clocked At A Speed Of 10 Feet Per Second.

Though farts come out with varying velocities, we don't typically smell them for about 10-15 seconds after letting them rip. This is because it takes that long for the odor to reach your nostrils.




Holding Farts In Could Be Bad For Your Health

Doctors disagree on whether or not holding in a fart is bad for your health. Some experts think that farts are a natural part of your digestive system, so holding them in won't harm you. Others think that at best, holding them in can cause gas, bloating, and other uncomfortable symptoms, and at worst, repressing gas can cause hemorrhoids or a distended bowel.

For Some Cultures, Farting Is No Big Deal

While most cultures feel that farts should be suppressed in polite company, there are some cultures that not only don't mind letting them fly in public, but they actually enjoy it. An Indian tribe in South America called the Yanomami fart as a greeting, and in China you can actually get a job as a professional fart-smeller!

In ancient Rome, Emperor Claudius, fearing that holding farts in was bad for the health, passed a law stating that it was acceptable to break wind at banquets.

Farts Are Flammable

As stated above, the methane and hydrogen in bacteria-produced farts make your gas highly flammable. This is why some people think it's a fun party trick to hold a lighter up to their bums and let one fly; doing so produces a big burst of flame, but is obviously very dangerous.

In rare cases, a build-up of flammable gasses in the intestines have caused explosions during intestinal surgeries!

Termites Produce The Most Farts Of Any Other Animal

It's hard to believe that the tiny termite is responsible for a great deal of our global warming problem on the planet. Termites fart more than any other animal, which produces methane gas. According to the Environmental Protection Agency, "Global emissions of methane due to termites are estimated to be between 2 and 22 Tg per year, making them the second largest natural source of methane emissions. Methane is produced in termites as part of their normal digestive process, and the amount generated varies among different species."

If You Hold Them In, They'll Just Come Out When You Sleep

Even if you clenched your butt and held them in all day, the gas will escape once you relax. What's more relaxing than sleep?

People Even Fart After Death

Here's proof that you can't escape passing wind, even after you're dead! Up to three hours after the body dies, gasses continue to escape from both ends of the digestive tract, resulting in burping or farting noises. This phenomenon is due to muscles contracting and expanding before rigor mortis sets in.

SOURCE: http://myoddnews..com/2013/06/10-odd-and-fascinating-facts-about.html

Anybody with Etisalat magic sim tweak?

benatex: I don't like marketing tinz..I wanna make money through the internet,online,not by buying some cheap products and selling them to some average nigerian

You're a lay bone son. Forgive my utterance, but you either end up a thief, or.... Either way Keep dreaming...

A mother and daughter duo who make P0*n films together are looking for a father-son team willing to join them on camera.
Jessica Sexxxton, 56, and her daughter, Monica, 22, have been shooting s*x scenes together for the last 18 months for their own self-titled website, sometimes sharing the same partner, but not at the same time and never with each other — a technicality that keeps their films from being legally considered inc*st.

Now the Tampa, Fla.-based twosome are hoping to take their unorthodox relationship to the next level, with a nationwide search for a real father and son willing to shoot a P0*n film scene with them.

“It’s something we’ve considered for a while,” Jessica Sexxxton told The Huffington Post. “We once dated brothers in real life on and off for a couple of years. They were closer to [Monica's] age, but we haven’t done a father and son in real life or on camera.”
Like the Sexxxtons, the father and son won’t have s*x with each other, but Monica already has the scenario for this sordid family affair in mind.
“Something like, ‘Hey Dad, my girlfriend’s got a hot mom,’” Monica hypothesized to HuffPost. “But we’d probably cater to the fantasy by having the father have s*x with me.”
The Sexxxtons tried casting a scene before using non-related actors as the father and son, but Monica said she didn’t like the results, because the man cast as the “Dad” “looked too much like the “Cockroach” guy from that movie, ‘Men In Black.’”
Family-oriented P0*n is a common fantasy scenario. But it’s rare to have real family members work together in movies.
In 1998, “Three Brothers,” a gay P0*n film, featured three real-life brothers, Vince, Shane and Hal Rockland, in a s*x scene with an unrelated male. The brothers didn’t have s*x with each other.

The Milton twins, Cali Marie and Cherish, have done scenes together since 2004, usually not touching. In 2008, P0*n star Elli Foxx filmed a scene with her mother, Desi, for a film called “Wanna F*** My Daughter Gotta F*** Me First 2.” They made sure to stay at least 10 feet apart while filming.


Adult industry historian Bill Margold said he’s “never even heard of rumors involving a father/son entity in P0*n.” He said the closest was an uncle and nephew who worked together. The Sexxxtons may change that with their campaign, which will end, appropriately (or inappropriately) enough, on Father’s Day.
The women will then decide which father-son duo fits the bill and arrange a test scene, provided the son is of legal age and both the dad and son successfully pass tests for sexually transmitted diseases.

Jessica Sexxxton said she is not attracted to a particular type — although she wouldn’t turn down Sean Connery. She said she hopes any applicants are “somewhat good-looking and not fat.”

“Obviously, they’d have to be somewhat open-minded sexually in order to be okay doing this with their son,” Jessica Sexxton said. “I do prefer men who are clean-shaven. And that means the face and the whole body — anywhere but the arms and legs.”

Monica Sexxxton said she wants any dads and sons who work with her to be able to do the job.
“They need to be able to perform so I’m not standing around,” she said. “This is a little different than s*x in real life. People don’t kiss. They don’t really make eye contact. They just go at it. [Filming Porn] takes the spontaneity out, but it’s still s*x, so it’s still good.”

The Sexxxtons said if they don’t find a father-son team that appeals to them, they won’t shoot a scene. Even if it happens, there’s no guarantee the movie will be a hit.
In fact, there is evidence to suggest the opposite, according to Nicole Prause, an assistant researcher at UCLA in the Department of Psychiatry who studies s*xual arousal in response to Porn.

“Research shows s*xual acts between any parent and child leads most people to report feeling high levels of disgust, especially women, so the strong reaction to their films is unlikely to be seen as more acceptable over time,” Prause said.

Source:http://myoddnews..com/2013/05/bizzare-partnership-mother-daughter.html

A Kentucky-based advertising agency is offering $5 per day to men willing to wear an ad in their beards. Ad agency Cornett-IMS designed their "beard-vertising" campaign for A&W Root Beer and says it is designed to help those with the gift of facial hair capitalize on natural talents.

We'll let you decide if this is genius or insane, but apparently there is at least some cheeky interest. "We’re getting a ton of emails from guys with epic beards that want to host beardboards and we’re actually in talks with some brands that want to be Beardvertisers. I think we’ll probably be seeing some beardboards in the wild before too long,” the ad agency Cornett-IMS’s Whit Hiler relayed to Foodbeast.com.

Of course, it's not the first time advertisers and people willing to sell their body parts have collaborated. Last year, a man tattooed a Romney-Ryan logo on his face only to have it removed after the election. Earlier this year, a New York firm told employees they would get a pay raise if they got a tattoo of the company's logo.

There is no word on whether cat beards can also apply to wear beard boards.

Source: http://myoddnews..com/2013/05/advertising-agency-offers-5-per-day-to.html

illitrate: And will his visit deposit money in people's account?
Someday people will beg to just visit.

ArQueBusieR: In their wildest dreams.

Na so o...

Yes! Good for them. them never see anything...

Nice one

Hmmm... Impressive!

No wonder that man (what's his name again?) rejected being a member of this amnesty whatever, cos he knows it's a failed committee ab initio...

[quote author=baby_123]I know couples that like to drink together. They could have met at a beer parlor. Who knows.[/quote]

ziccoit: You thought he met his death because he didn't listen? Every event in life has been pre-destined million of years before a man is borned.

Maybe, but if he had listened, perhaps he would still be alive right now. But it's too late now. So sad...

So sad So sad

God punish devil!

gboss4sure: The girl get luck that her face didnt show.. Moreover @OP you are helping these guy spread the picture.

I wonder.

[quote author=Paris-Love]www.nairaland.com/attachments/840165_ragecomic_NL_png62abca8b618a4e33a26c43e0ced4f83f

Courtesy of logicboy. [/quote]

Seun: Rule 17 is the most controversial rule because it sounds unfair. My fellow moderators have debated this rule at length and it could not be changed. We cannot extend the prohibition against offence to other religions because that limits your freedom of speech, and [b]we cannot remove that rule without jeopardising security and the safety of lives.[b] Sorry about this.

Best regards,
Seun Osewa.

I think some islamic bastards have threatened to kill Seun if he dare remove the controversial rule 17, if not why would he say it can't be removed for [b]security and safety of lives[b] reasons.

This clearly proves what islam is; religion of blood.

No kidding!

begwong: ...lord seun lugard decree of 2013 as amended

ok

ok...