http://hovabuzz.com/stories-on-episode/1051-confessions-of-a-funaab-yahoo-yahoo-boy-the-tales-of-gbadebo-episode-1

When I got to the house where I was squatting. The guy don almost empty the house. He had almost sold everything in the room. The room was virtually empty. He said he was finally leaving that evening back to Lagos and the only thing he left for me was a wall hanger. The foam, he said some one was coming to pick it. Not quite long I came in, the person came and carried it. Na so everybody for the compound dey hail am as he dey leave. He said he had told the landlord that he was leaving. The rent was expiring the next 3 weeks and if I wasn’t going to renew, I should leave because the landlord na “No-nonsense” man.

Na so My guy com finally leave. I began thinking of how to raise N24, 000 for the room. And the house was arguably one of the cheapest and very neat in the area.

As I slept that night, i went into deep thoughts again. At a time I felt like just giving up and going back to Ilorin. But I just had to keep calm.

I told myself that I would try as much to be friendly with the neighbors since the original guy who owns the room had left. There were about 4 rooms in the compound. 3 rooms were occupied by thee females while the remaining one was occupied by my guy that left. I don’t really know much of the girls neither have I had a reasonable conversation with them except but one of them, Adaobi. When I was paying for my school fee and other registration, she congratulated me and welcomed me to Funaab. She said she was in 200Level. Na she be the only person wey I don talk to. The other two girls, I just dey greet them dey waka. But I knew that one of them was Emmanuella. Most times they do call her Nuella. And the other Bola. My guy used to call them by their names before he left.

The next morning, I woke up in the empty room. As my guy don waka make he go find him destiny. As I stood up, it looked as if my whole body was hit with hammer. Body dey pain me. That’s the danger of sleeping on ordinary floor. I brought out my tooth paste, took the remaining sachet water left from the one I drank the previous day. I went outside to brush my teeth. I saw Adaobi. I greeted her and she was just hailing me. “Fresher! Freshest fresher,” she asked when the matriculation would hold, and I told her. “I know you will be missing bode(my guy that had left),” she said. I laughed timidly. She was trying to be friendly as we talked. She asked when I would start buying things into the room. Hmmm, I didn’t even know how to reply her. “How I wished she knew my predicament.” “Even the house sef, I don’t have money to rent it. I just dey stay come dey hope say miracle go happen.” Well I told her that I would soon start buying my own things. As we were just talking, Bola came out of the room, “Gbadebo fresher, you have landed! Welcome to Alabata,” Bola shout and we laughed.

The first two weeks was very difficult for me. I was so worried about accommodation. I wanted to make good friends who could just help me out. I have heard that it was not easy getting some body to squat with. Though I had not been open up to any one. I can’t just go out and start telling random people my problem. I just want to make new and good friends I could confide in.” The empty house I was staying, the rent was nearing expiry day and I don’t know what to do. Adaobi was very helpful even though I was yet to tell her what I was passing through. When going to school, if I meet her at the mancot stand where the school costal big bus picks student to school. If we enter together, she would always pay for me. All that prompted me to open up to her one particular evening when she told me that the landlord of the house came and wanted to put new tenants. So they had asked me to vacate the place immediately since I wasn’t ready to renew bode’s rent.” Na so I begin tell her my challenges, how things be for house and I couldn’t even afford rent oo. Adaobi pitied and encouraged me. Infact she even gave me food that night o. I couldn’t even tell her to come stay with her. I felt it was gross. But she herself said she would have accommodated me but because of her boyfriend who normally comes around which won’t be good for their relationship.

This particular Wednesday which was the matriculations day. I didn’t even have the N1000 to pay for the matriculation gown. Na so I just sit don for house.

In the evening when Bola came to me and asked that I should give them my own matric package. I tell them say I no do anything ooo in terms of refreshment. Say money no dey. She said she was going to a friend’s own that invited her for matric party. She gave me her phone to help plug it when Emmanuella puts on her generator. And she left.

Na so Emmanuella on Gen oo. Na only her get Generator since my guy left. I and Emmanuella, we no dey too dey talk. Its just “Good morning! Good morning” that only brings us together.

As I knocked and entered her house with bola’s phone to charge it. As she saw me, na so this girl shout.

Emmanuella – Saaahh, what is this Ilorin native doctor doing in my house.

I began wondering who she was talking to. Na so I turn make I look whether anyone was at my back. But none. Na me this girl dey talk to ooo. She was referring to me as “Ilorin native doctor.” She started shouting and yelling at me and asked me to leave her room with my dirty, smelly, poverty cursed body. This girl come begin abuse me oo. She Said I am an insane destitute and looked like my sick mother in Ilorin. I wondered who told her that my mom was ill. I remembered confiding in Adaobi about my situation. So na so she go tell her. Na so water begin com out for my eye as I enter my empty room. I started thinking about my life. As I cried, I remembered it has been over a week I called my mom. I only had N400 with me. If that one finish, only God know were I go take get another money. I just wanted to hear my mom’s voice. Each time I was down she normally consoles me, encourages me even when I try to give up.

As I was sitting inside weeping, I heard adaobi calling my name from outside. I immediately wiped my eyes. I didn’t want anyone to know I was crying. She immediately came into the room. I guessed she was just coming back from school. She asked why I was just alone inside the room. I told her I was just resting. Even though I felt angered by what she had done, telling emmanuella some few things I told her about myself. “Only God knew how many people she had already told”. I asked Adaobi if she could spare me a few minutes from her airtime to call my mom, that’s if she has. She graciously gave me her phone and I called my mom. Mom told me she was feeling better. I love my mom to the core. She had always been my best friend and I do confide in her. During the course of the call, I told her how someone (Emmanuella) abused a hell out of me. She herself felt my pain. She encouraged me. I also told her that I was broke. Mommy tell me say house just dey empty and nothing dey house. Even if say I come, I no go see anything collect. But how I go take see money even come sef! After the call, I gave adaobi her phone and also Bola’s so she can go help her charge it at Nuella’s room. My guy that left had always said that nuella was very proud someone. “Maybe because she came from a well-to-do family. She feels she’s better than everyone else.” Well na so I stay for my poverty stricken empty room. After a while, I went out and bought 3 bottles of soft drinks. “ I thought that In as much I was poor, I don’t have money that does not mean I can’t do things for people”. Adaobi dey try for me wella. Bola too is doing well too. I got the bottles of drink and gave to Adaobi to share among Bola and nuella. I was only left with N130. At least I don do well to celebrate my matric. Few minutes later, Adaobi returned Nuella’s drink saying she said she wasn’t taking. Na so me drink the thing.

The next morning, I went to school a bit late. I met my departmental colleagues submitting one general course assignment to my Head of class (HOC). I had done mine but forgot it at home. Na so I rush come re-do the thing again. After doing it na so one guy see my procedures and answers. He asked how I got it because someone told him that the lecturer in charge had hinted them about the answers which was what I had. He said he had being going around but no one had gotten the exact answer the lecturer talked about except me. Me sef, I no sure say I dey class when the lecturer dey hint them answers. Na so this guy collect my book come do copy-n-paste. He copied what I wrote into his own booklet. He thanked me and went his way.

The next day, another lecturer gave us another assignment to submit the upper week.

The next week came and was about to submit my assignment to my HOC when I met the guy that copied my work the previous week. “Baba I don dey find you since,”...

what is he looking for me for??


................To be continued......

story begins................


You are here: Home Stories on Episode Confessions of A FUNAAB Yahoo Yahoo Boy; The Tales Of Gbadebo---- Episode 1
Confessions of A FUNAAB Yahoo Yahoo Boy; The Tales Of Gbadebo---- Episode 1
Created on Friday, 11 December 2015 18:11 | Written by Christian C. Ozor
All Rights Reserved: No part of this work; either in parts or in whole should and it’s licensed to any Organization or person in any format; electronic or otherwise without permission of the author.

The quotes, plots, events, characters, names and all its contents are properties of the author. Any names, places and events of this story relating to a person or people; living or dead is a “coincidence.”

Author of this work is Christian C. Ozor

08137831811

www.hovabuzz.com



This book is sold for N200

follow our updates on this website. You can purchase the full story in "PDF" or "word format" for just N200. you can pay with airtime (recharge cards).. 08137831811 (whatsapp) or email onismate@gmail.com to get your copy. Your copy will be sent to you within 10 minutes of payment.

Confessions of A FUNAAB Yahoo Yahoo Boy;

The Tales Of Gbadebo



I had always looked at myself as a child of promise. Even my mom use to say it; That when I was born, the chief Iman of Ilorin came and prayed for me. He prophesied into my life that I will do well and achieve great things at a very young age. He also said that my parents will be elevated. But now am wondering what has gone wrong about those prophesies? What is holding them back? Why has it not come to pass. The worse part of it is that my dad died when I was 5. The elevation prophesy sef, even if say e come, na only my mama go come chop inside! Or maybe the gods are punishing my family because we later converted from Muslim to Christian religion!

All that were my thought. My heart was bitter. I just dey regret. Na who send me go write JAMB! Na who send me go even write the FUNAAB Post UTME! If I had known I would have saved that money and use it for better things as my mother had suggested. I no hear. Na so I use the money go write JAMB. And that would be the second time I was writing JAMB and passing through, yet no money for tuition fees. No money to further. I wrote one the previous year and choose University of Ibadan. I passed the Jamb but there was no common N3000 to process my Post UTME. Chaiiii, poverty bad. I encouraged myself. My mom had earlier said I should give up on going to school, that there was no money to see me through. Yes, I saw her point but I was hoping for a miracle to happen. I was just believing that I would just see a tree full of money and start plucking them. Or maybe meeting a helper that would say, “Let me just train you through your higher institution.”

I had saved up to N45, 000 the past year. I gave my best at where I worked just to see I save money for my school. My mom who was into Akara business. She had been complaining about her eye problem. Out of the N45,000, I gave her N12,000 to go for treatment. Money don short nah. But I was determined that I won’t lose that admission. I must enter university this time. No going back, whether money dey or not.

That was how my mom nearly closed down her Akara business that she was raising fund for me to go to school. She borrowed N27, 000 from the cooperative group she was. Plus the one I had. I went to Federal University Of Agriculture Abeokuta (Funaab), paid my admission acceptance fee, school fees and other fees. We never even start to dey talk accommodation sef. The guy I was squatting with had graduated and he was leaving the room the next weekend. I had earlier asked if he would leave some few things for me. He said he couldn’t, that he needed money badly so he wants to sell them. Even if the guy leave am for me, how I wan take pay for accommodation sef! He has really tried. I met him when I came to write my post UTME. I didn’t even know anybody in Abeokuta. But he was God sent. He harboured me for 4 days and I still came back, he was still harbouring me. He said the rent would be due the next two weeks.

So after paying the necessary fees, I had to go back home to sort myself on accommodation and feeding, refresh and come back to campus fully the next week to resume.

When I got home, things were not so good at all. My mom was down with malaria. I know say she go don dey think how she go take pay back the money wey she borrow from cooperative. And even her crumbling business, coupled with all the irony of life. I only had N430 left with me at that moment inside my pocket. I had to rush to the chemist shop to get my mom drugs. I called one of our relatives in Offa and updated her on what was happening to my mom.

3 days later, it seemed my mom was recovering gradually. I withdrew the last N5, 000 in my account and went to buy provisions and food stuffs. There was nothing much at home. At least, even if say person poor, that does not mean say we no go chop better food.

A day before travelling back to Abeokuta, I went to the place I worked before leaving. My former Oga wey like me wella. He gave me N2,000. I told him I was going back to school. Some of my paddies still dash me small money. I calculated everything and it amounted to N3, 450.

“Gbadebo! Gbadebo!!” my mom called. I was outside chatting with a friend when he called. I came into the room. “Gbadebo,” she said. “Ma,” I answered. She brought out some squeezed naira notes from the edge of her wrapper were she tied it. She handed them over to me. I counted them and It was N3, 500. “Kosi owo. Manage elei.” She said I should manage it that there was no money. Infact, she even tried. I couldn’t say anything. As I took the money, I went to bed to sleep, thinking of how my 4 year journey would look like in Funaab with my poverty condition.

The next morning, I arranged my only travelling bag, which doubles as my school bag. I only had few clothes which I inserted into the bag, with the only foot wear I had, my pam slippers, na im I go wear go back. “I am going to school.” person wey see me go think say I dey joke. Na only 2 trousers and 5 shirts wey I get I put inside my bag. I didn’t have time to buy many things because I was saving to go to school. The only mobile phone we had, a small touchlight phone. I had to leave it with my mom. I told her I would be calling from a business center. It was better for me that way so I could be reaching out to her rather than me taking the phone to school.

I looked my mom into the eye as I was about leaving for the park. She looked worried seeing me leave. “I guessed she was worried how I would cope.” I hugged her and left to the park where I would be boarding a car to Ibadan. As I entered one of the cars going to Ibadan, I wasn’t happy. My heart was filled with too many weird thoughts that I didn’t even know when the car got filled up, I paid and we left.

On the road to Ibadan, “I thought about my life.” After paying for my transportation, I was only left with N4,450. We never get to Ibadan ooo. I have not even talked about my accommodation. Where will I even stay? How will I feed sef? And I go even pay transport go school. As all those thoughts were flipping through my mind, tears ran down my eyes. The woman sitting close to me was the one that even called my attention. She asked what was wrong with me that I shed tears. And we were sitting at the front seat opposite the driver. I had to bring out my handkerchief from my pocket and whipped my face. I don’t even know what to tell the woman. I wished she was Jesus that could just take my burden away. Well, I told her that it’s just some family related issues that was making me shed tears. “Family issues keh!” she said. She spoke in Yoruba language. She asked what kind of family issue was that. I no wan tell her. One don’t just go around telling people their problems. I felt reluctant telling her. “Part of me said I should open up to her while another part of me said I should not. She seemed to be asking genuinely but she’s just a random person. Even if I tell her, will she adopt me or give me N1m.” I just told her that the money I was giving to for my school was not enough. Immediately I said that, almost every one inside the car busted into laughter. Part of me was like, “You see, you see wetin I tell you. You should have not told her.” I began regretting saying it out. The woman laughed uncontrollable in a mocking tone. “Is that the family problem,” she asked. She said there are some people their own case was worse so mine was even not a case. By then, I just wished she knew more about my own case. As other people in the car were talking, some gisting and telling stories of how their children survive in higher institution. I just ignored them. “No be their own e dey me sef. I went back into deep thoughts that I didn’t even know when we got to Ibadan. The woman beside me called my attention when she was alighting. She was kind enough to give me N500. I accepted it graciously and thanked her as she told me not to cry. She left. Well, N500 will definitely go a long way.

Na so I take car wey dey enter Abeokuta. It dropped me in a popular spot called “Camp,” a road leading to Funaab. The place I am squatting.

to be continued.....

All Rights Reserved: No part of this work; either in parts or in whole should and it’s licensed to any Organization or person in any format; electronic or otherwise without permission of the author.

The quotes, plots, events, characters, names and all its contents are properties of the author. Any names, places and events of this story relating to a person or people; living or dead is a “coincidence.”

Author of this work is Christian C. Ozor


www.hovabuzz.com


This book is sold for N200

follow our updates on this website. You can purchase the full story in "PDF" or "word format" for just N200 on www.hovabuzz.com. www.onihaxy.com .you can pay with airtime (recharge cards).. 08137831811 (whatsapp) or em onismaailte@gmail.com to get your copy. Yo curopy will be sent to you within 10 minutes of payment.




special thanks to my man onihaxy

I want to share this interesting story of a young man Named "Gbadebo." His Adventures when he got admission into FEDERAL UNIVERSITY OF AGRICULTURE ABEOKUTA, (FUNAAB). What led to his venture to the dark world, the women in his life...
just seat down, grab your pop corn and bottles of zobos and soya milk... from episode 1 till the end...
take a front seat and follow this story....

Lordtrillion:

Hi Chizin, thanks for the help on the Heat Press procurement. I really appreciate
I'm currently in need of a printer, Epson Wf-7110 precisely. I Couldnt source for it in Onitsha after buying the heat press coz of d protest last week. Incase you know any store that has it in stock where I can buy it, pls let me know. Thanks

congrats my brother.. and big ups chizin ... I really like ur spirit. it seem u are based in Asaba. maybe each time I come for holiday I can be shifting jobs to u

Jasper14:
Op, another question is dat, if it is a must to coat in a very dark place or just in absence of sunlight in a room dat is luminous? secondly, if i use tiny black character to write something, will it be visible enough when i print it?

your first question .... it's done in the absence of sunlight.
second question... it's better your text characters are very bold so it could print clearly. if they are too tiny, it will print but one can't see it clearly

Jasper14:

hv done dat already.

I have replied u

Jasper14:

alright thanks, i will try again. But can i get ur whatsapp contact? so dat i can send u pics of my practical, mine is 80-39387128. I reside in onitsha incase u are around.

Pm me

Jasper14:
Op, am keenly following ur thread and am impressed and i hv learnt so much here inwhich i hv started undergoing practicals of it. But my difficulty here is using water and foam to wash off d layer dat will gv way for printing. No matter hw hard i tried, it doesnt washoff making it unable to print. Though it do printed out well on mesh after sunning it. Is there any chemical dat helps wash it off well and neat, and also saves time? Urgent reply pls, cos d practical is on progress...

I guess u left it in the sun for too long that is why its taking u time. no chemical that I know of now. Please reduce the time u allow it to be in the sun

Here are photos of corpers being punished for coming to parade ground late. The corpers were asked to kneel and craw with there kneel. "The only thing possible in this life is discipline. Lolz... This is 2015 Batch b rivers camp..

http://www.hovabuzz.com/frontline/1050-photos-corpers-being-punished-for-coming-late-to-parade-ground-in-camp

This is for my friends and Prospective corps members looking for the best orientation camp. Its better you spend 3 weeks in a worse orientation camp and enjoy one 11 months in a good apartment than spending 3 weeks of orientation in a luxury camp and spend 11 months in a dungeon..
They said “Obey the clarion call” as corper. But them no know say e no dey easy to serve Nigeria. As corper posted to a core interior village, one get so many disadvantages. For me serving in Rivers state, I was so depressed that I was posted to a riverine area where there is no electricity power, no mobile browsing network. One moves around with speed boat and we were told that NYSC has asked us to learn atleast one skill this one year. How do we learn a skill when we don’t have mobile network to get information; no power supply to do some major works, no water and some basic amenities.

And they will tell you “it’s a sacrifice for your nation.” Yes we are sacrificing but the location we are has denied us of so many valuable things. Why can’t NYSC give higher pay to corpers serving in core interior places because their own sacrifice is more. Rather than us paying huge amount of money for transportation going to cities for trainings, NYSC should send the trainers to us.

Well let me not bore you my readers with too many words. One of my friend serving in Benue state for Batch B 2015 sent me a photo of himself and the lodge the community he was serving in gave to him. I no fit believe say my corper friend dey stay inside mud house as lodge. My guy that shared a before and present Nysc status of himself. Before NYSC my guy was leaving in comfort but presently, na mud house him dey stay now as corpers lodge for the community. Check out the photo.


Check Out The Executive Corpers Lodge Giving To A friend Serving In Benue State

http://www.hovabuzz.com/frontline/1049-check-out-the-executive-corpers-lodge-giving-to-a-friend-serving-in-benue-state

wailing wailers, talking talkers.... yesterday in Onitsha was terrible and the president is yet to say any thing about it.. yet he's travelling, they are passing rubbish bill. employment bill that will aid all those miscreants and touts they are using to disrupt Onitsha is far better than this their 'shut up social media' bill

Lordtrillion:

Ok, thanks. I also have another question. Concerning the Heat Press, what's the best size to go for? The Seller whom Chizin referred me to buy from calls it A4 Size. I guess that's the local name its called. I will like to confirm if its the equivalent of 15*15 or 16*20 as its known Online coz I will be travelling down soon to Onitsha to buy it. Thanks

The A4 size is good. I dont know about the online stuff you saw. since you are going to Onitsha, you will see the sizes and choose from the one you want

Lordtrillion:


Hi Sir, concerning the printer, which of the Epson work force printer do you think is the best from Experience considering the transfer paper. I Browsed online about Epson workforce printers & I was overwhelmed & overloaded with the informations of the different models & their features.

I want to take advantage of the ongoing promotions to get it at a discounted price online. Thanks

hmmmm.. from what I browsed, I feel any of the workforce is good. I can't categoriticaly tell you about any of the best because I haven't used any. I am only planning to go for one of them .

amicable09:
. I've had a good laugh... lol. That part where you said some ladies came with ulterior motives cracked me up.

Onis you really experience something, but then, this idea of paying someone to get a job is somewhat funny. If you had 200,000 will you be looking for a job as Secretary?

BTW I chose a smiley, God help this post. May there be no duplication of words. Amen... lol

forget ooo. some people can romance your head to believe they can help you.

the guy is too gbaski..

About 6 hausa business men in my areas are now complaining. During the election they were ready to die for Baba Buhari. They abused a heck out of any one supporting GEJ. I was thrown into laughter last week when one of them said he wants GEJ back. This men's business are really failing in this era of Buhari. the are loosing money.

But one thing I came to realize was that, some of the ladies who came there, many of them have ulterior motives. They are not genuinly looking for a job. Some wants connection with politicians, some wants to be second wives, some side chick/bedmates. Some na runs ooo. Because when we were leaving after I managed to submit my CV to one of the women who promised to help me, some ladies who I saw that came to look for job. Some of them have cars. I saw them driving out of the premises. Some even parked outside the gate. No be just ordinary car ooo. This one na better car o.
Few days later, the woman I gave my CV at NASS called me. She said a job was ready for me at NASS. I asked him the kind of job it was. She said I should come first to NASS.
The next day I went to NASS and met the woman and she told me that lawmaker was looking for someone that would work as secretary in her new company. See as my face brighten up as I hear that one. But she said I should pay N200,000 and that the job was sure. After paying to her, she would just help me work it out. Kaiiiii, me pay N200k to get job. Chaiii, were I fit get that kind money! And she said I should up up in the next one week or she would allocate the slot to another person, and infact many are willing to take it. And this woman na just cleaner for NASS, but her own cleaner na “Cleaner with a difference.” She has one small sports car. Infact NASS job is very lucrative. I told her I would get back to her.
When I called Ij, she said I should look for money to pay. Na so I ask if she fit borrow me, she said she doesn’t have anything in her account and that I should tell my sister. I told my sister, she too tell me say money no dey. I assumed that its not the will of God to get the job. Na so I remove my mind from the job. I applied for another job as a Geography teacher in one big school in Maitama. Thank God say dem call me. Na there I come dey work now. The pay is okay.

http://hovabuzz.com/frontline/1047-my-job-adventure-at-the-national-assembly

I wasn’t just keeping calm, I kept on going to my sister’s church. I kept on pressurizing her to help me get in contact with some top politicians who are members of the church. Infact, that my sister church, has top CEOs, Director generals of big companies. And I kept on wondering if those kind of people attends that church, some people in the church shouldn’t be unemployed. My sister sef no dey help matters at all. I told her to help me tell those big men for their church if they can find somewhere to fix me in were they work. She doesn’t want to do it. Life is a game of race. Everyone go run him own race. That was why I just got angry one Sunday like that after the church service. I approached one of the women leader in the church. I heard she works in National Assembly. Na so I go meet her ooo. I told her I was looking for job. She told me to come to the National Assembly the next two days. I confidently asked for her number so when I come I could meet with her, because I heard the NASS complex is so large. She gave me her mobile number to reach her. As she dey call am, I just type the thin, save am.
One of my sister’s friend, Ijeoma had earlier told me she would be going to the National Assembly to look for Job. I.J as my sister fondly call her is one girl that can do anything to get what she wants. This is a lady that is into baking. She bakes cakes, meat pie and all that. And supplies them to big restaurants. According to my sister, Ij makes up to N25,000 profit from her business. She was deep into it. And she wan go find NASS job or P.A to senator.
Two days later, Ij called me that she had already prepared and she was on her way to our house. Me sef don dey prepare finish. Na so Ij land for my house. She came with a friend of her she said her name is Nkoli. Looking at both them, one won’t believe they are just going to look for a job. The clothes they were putting on. The suit and the shoes. I do follow my sister to do her shopping. So I am familiar with female clothings and pricing. Kaiiii, the suit wey nkoli and Ij wear, they may be up to N40,000 each. With their heels. ‘Mehn if they could afford something like that, why are they looking for job sef,’ I thought to myself. I felt intimidated by their dressing. I thought to myself, “If any of us had a car, we for no trek go NASS.. we go just enter car zoom off.”
As we entered the bus going to Berger from Bwari. You need to see the way people inside the bus were looking at Ij and nkoli. Person wey see them no go know say dem wan go look for job. He would think they work in big companies and they are on their way to work. Na so me sit down je-jely and we move.
We got to NASS complex at about 10:39am. That would be my first time of going there, but not nkoli and Ij as I was told. Abeg come and see people, unemployed ooo. I began wondering. So this are the people I am going to be dragging the post of P.A with! At first I even thought there was an interview going on before Ij started gisting me that the reason why we are there is also the reason they came. Everybody dey find job. Dem wan be P.A, secretary or aides to Lawmakers. I was told that as new lawmakers are being inaugurated at the NASS, aids of former ones have been laid off while the new lawmakers would be needing aids. Na im make people just full there say dem wan be aid. Fear come begin catch me. With all that number of people, do I even have a chance! ‘Infact the ladies, now I know’ I thought o myself. The way IJ dressed, infact most of the ladies even dressed in a more and sophifisticated clothes that I began wondering if they came for a coperate fashion show. Their clothes were so expensive that I wondered if they were really unemployed. Who give them the money wey dem take dey buy those expensive clothes wey them wear. Give me the money and I will go start a good business. At a time I began to check the people I was greeting because so many that dressed so beautifuly, one might think they work there, but dem just come look for work like me.
I have been distracted by what I was seeing instead of focusing on the job I came there to look for. As I was busy admiring the dresses some people wore, I immediately remembered that the woman at the church that gave me her number. That was the main reason I came. I called the woman’s phone number and it was telling me it’s switched off. This one na wahala. The worst part of it was that I kept on trying for like an hour the phone was switched off.but na she tell me make I call her dat day oo, now the line is switched off. “Then what was I hear for nah,” I thought to myself. Ij and her friend don waka comot, I no know where dem enter. na so I stand for there dey look. I saw Ij with one man coming to my direction. They came to where I was and she introduced me to the man. She said the man works in that NASS. Na so the man come begin insult me jokingly. He said I was too dull. That if I was really in need, I would have been doing what my mates where doing, I just stood there and was looking as if NASS is a museum. “Na look you come look?” he ask. I managed to laugh as Ij laughed too. He tolod Ij not to worry that immediately after the inauguration of law makers, he would help us get a job. “No worry yourself, you go get job,” he said. Before leaving after joking and chatting with Ij, he turned to me, “and you Mr, try to mingle, enter inside, collect people numbers.” He said normally that some lawmakers go through them to get aids. “Sometimes na we dey help dem, dem go beg us make we help them find better people wey go be their secretary or P.A,” he said. He said I should move around and interact with workers of the NASS. After leaving, me sef agree say I dey dull myself. Ij even said it that she has collected over 7 contacts that works in that NASS, they can help her get a job. In as much I was dulling myself, I was trying to be careful because I no wan trouble. One treats political jobs “Critical.”

http://hovabuzz.com/frontline/1047-my-job-adventure-at-the-national-assembly

Griiiiiinnn, the phone rang. One need to see the way I ran out of the bathroom with all the soapy water on my body and a piece of towel. I thought it was one of the places I went for an interview some past weeks. I thought they were calling to tell me congratulations, that I have passed their interview and I have been hired. Only for me to check the the phone and the number calling, it was one of my elder sisters. I became vexed. I felt like not picking the call. I ignored it and went back to the bathroom to finish taking my bath. But trust Aunty Buchi nah. She won’t just stop. She kept on calling till I finally picked after 6 missed calls. “Where have you been that you didn’t see my call,” she shouted, as if I was a small boy working for his Oga in a welding factory. Immediately I heard that, na so my head swear. Chaiiii, that is the kind of thing you get when you are unemployed and still begging your siblings money for survival. E come look as if say I own aunty buchi to answer her call.
“Aunty I dey bathroom na im make I no pick your call,” I replied sluggishly. She told me there was this friend of hers that told her their company in Abuja was recruiting. So I should prepare my things and come down to Abuja in the next three days time. See as she just dey talk am as if say she be commando in the army division of my life. I told her that I don’t have much money to travel down to Abuja, perhaps I wasn’t ready, she should give me some time. “Do you want a job or not?” she shouted at me, “Or you just want to sit down look. You better look for money and come, I will give you when you arrive. Bye.” Na so she hang phone. I just wondered, the aunty buchi I grew up with was not like this, but since she got married to military man, na so things change. I guessed Col. Chinedu has turned her to another thing.
Three days later, I arranged my things and off I went to Abuja at my sister’s place. And this period, the 2015 elections were fast approaching. Aunty buchi briefed me about the job. It was an insurance company.
The next day, I had already repackage my CV. Aunty buchi’s friend had earlier given me a note to go along with. She referred me t o somebody in the company.
Na so I waka reach there. They told me that indeed they were vacancies but the job positions were not meant for HND holders like us. That one come become wahala. Na so I call my sister and she called that her friend. Finally, they accepted my CV. but i wasn’t yet sure, maybe they threw it away after I left, I don’t know. I waited for days and weeks but yet no call or text. My sister had earlier told me not to go back to Owerri. That I should stay back in Abuja. Na so I begin find work ooo. But I desired a Government work which I believed would give me rest of mind. Couple of friends encouraged me. Though it would be stressful because its election period. That after the election and swearing in, things would get better, jobs go boku.
Elections came and gone. We thanked God it was successful and new administration was coming in so many would be laid off and many would be hired. They did the swearing in.
My sister came back from work one evening. She was talking about one of their church members who won a seat at the federal house of Representatives. The man gave thanks giving at their church that past Sunday and he said youths that youths in the church that are looking for job should prepare because he and his other colleagues would be employing aids. My sister turned to me and was like, “Abi uno fit work as P.A for senator?” she asked. Who no like better thing! Why won’t I want to be a Personal assistant if it was possible! As I hear that one, I was so happy. My sister said she has heard from couple of friends that some of their family members are aids to some of the lawmakers, that some of those top politicians pay up to N200,000 per month to their P.As and some other aids. She said she knows a notable senator who gives his P.A N5,000 just for feeding for a day. Abeg wetin I wan chop wey I go spend N5,000 for food for a day. Abi I wan finish the whole food wey dey the restaurant! Na so I tell my aunty say I go follow her go their church that coming Sunday. Their church wey be say I never set their foot to since wey I enter Abuja. Well, we dey look for work, so I have to go to their church.
Since that day till the Sunday, na so so dream I dream. When I sleep, I would always dream of seeing myself carrying a bag for a notable politician. I dream of being a P.A.
I followed my sister to their church hoping to even see the politician, but I didn’t see him. My sister said maybe he travelled out of the country that was why we didn’t see him. Wetin I wan even see the man for! Not that I will even go and talk with him.
After the church service, before people started rushing out, they made an announcement that people looking for a job, that the politician has asked that they should put down their names on the paper they were circulating. Come see as people they rush go their. I no know say Government work, being a P.A dey very lucrative like that. Most especially young ladies. I considered some of the ladies so classy and beautiful, even the kind of shows, heels they were wearing, I never knew they were jobless as they rushed to go put down their names. Me sef no shame ooo. My sister urged me to go put down my name. chaiiii, but this na to spoil business for people. Because 70% of the youths wrote down their names. I began wondering whether my dream of becoming a P.A would be a reality! Because people too plenty. Can this Honourable give every of us job! The ladies were much.
When we were going from the church, my sister said I shouldn’t mind some of the people rushing out and putting down their names. She said some of them have jobs oo. So why dem come dey write name nah. She said maybe some wants to work with politicians, dem wan change job and status. They want to eat political money. She even talked about one of the ladies who is a banker but went to write down her name.

http://hovabuzz.com/frontline/1047-my-job-adventure-at-the-national-assembly

Objectives:



Ok.

onismate@gmail.com thanks

Objectives:
My pleasure, please check your mail.

Please can I get a sample of the proposal too

same thing happened last year. I have told my sister to hold on first, she shouldn't try buying anything because I don't trust all this Nigerian ecommerce companies. that was why I was never moved when the advert was everywere about the black Friday. which black Friday! Black Friday koh, purple Sunday nih..

I know the toner she used, its omo and tura soap

A beautiful piece

A big congrats to you.. Delay is not denial

Tonyebarcanista this is your analysis, but will APC agree? when jagaban will be feeding and feasting on this opportunity to get his candidate

Sitting at the dinning chair, gobbling large mass of eba and unhydrolized egusi soup into my mouth. I didn’t want to care what

my other siblings who laughed as they watch me eat in a weird manner. There was a knock on the door. “That should be felicia,” I thought to myself. The way the knock sounded, na only her fit knock like that. My elder sister asked who was knocking. “It’s felicia,” the voice echoed from outside. I said it. Na felicia.

Felicia is a very close friend of my sister, Vero. My sister, vero opened the door and the hug, the “baby how far nah” began. Mcheeeeww, women shah. Na so she come inside come see me dey chop. She turned to my sister, “Na hunger dey do your brother like this?” felicia asked vero. Me sef come dey laugh as everybody laugh. My sister told her not to mind me, that I didn’t eat the previous night. Finally I talked. I told felicia to come join me. “So its now you are inviting me! When you have finished eating,” felicia said . We laughed as she and my sister began gisting about the new hair style she (felicia) was wearing. My sister admired it, and was really impressed. My sister asked if it was that her usual place she made her new hairstyle. “Where else would I want to do my hair again if not that place,” was felicia’s response. Felicia said she always feels relaxed and each time her hair is been fixed by one cameroonian guy at the salon, she feels relaxed and sleeps off. Felicia has always told my sister, vero about this salon she normally fixes her hair. All the hair dressers working there are guys and she loves where guys fixes her hair. She would often tell my sister about one cameroonian guy that often fixes her hair and how whenever her hair is been done there by the guys, she often relaxes and sleeps off. And she enjoys it. And the argument began. My sister said she can never sleep even if an angel comes down from heaven to make her hair. “Lai-lai, it can never happen. If the cameroonian guy is fixing my hair, I can’t sleep,” my sister vero said. My sister said she loves women fixing her hair and not men. Na so felicia come tell my sister say, if she goes to that salon, so many women are trooping to the place to make their hair and fix their nails. Many of the women coming there are wealthy and sugar mommies. My sister said she would try out the saturday the coming Saturday. Since felicia had always been telling her about the place. So make she try enter the place.

Saturday came and vero my sister asked me to escort her to the salon felicia was talking about. I graciously accepted the offer.

We got to the salon, omo na so my mouth just open. Thank God say fly no enter. All the staffs fixing the hairs of the ladies were just males. Na thick thick women wey get money I just see balance come dey do manicure and perdicure. Some of the guys braided their hair. Na so my sister sit don e come reach her turn. She said she was going to do center parting and some other things she told the guy that would fix it. She come balance make she see how she go take sleep say guy wan do her hair. I come sit down for one corner dey watch. Most of the guys for their fix artificial nails sef. The guy wey wan fix my sister hair bring fresh fried groundnut come and gave to I and my sister. We collect they chop. Me sef come believe say the place make sence. He brought 2 canned malt and gave to us. And she began making my sister’s hair. Till she finished making her hair, my sister never shot her eyes. She no sleep. Because I wanted to see and know what would make my sister sleep. My sister began bragging to me that she told felicia that nothing would make her sleep. She asked the guy how much was the money. And he said it was N3,500. My sister smiled. “Bros abeg tell me your price. Stop this your joke,” my sister said. The guy too laughed and said he wasn’t joking, that that was her price. “N3500 for ordinary center parting.” My sister said. She thought the guy was joking with the price. My sister said was it because of the malt and groundnut he gave us. The guy busted into laughter and was even friendly by telling my sister to ask everyone making their hair there. Maybe it was her first time of coming to the place. Surely, it was my sister’s first time. Na im be say the guy dey serious. Na so my sister drag the guy go one corner come begin beg. She told him that she only had N1000 with her at that moment. The boy said he can only collect N2000 just for grace and because that was her first time. Na so I carry N1000 wey I wan take do subscription for my phone. I carry the money give my sister to add for her own. We paid. My sister vowed never to come back to the place again. She come dey regret. If she know, she for go cicilia salon wey near our compound. Na there she dey make her hair before oo. Na felicia carry her go cameroonian people own oo wey she over spend..

http://hovabuzz.com/frontline/1045-she-sleeps-off-each-time-a-guy-retouches-her-hair-at-the-saloon

ayokanmi3:
mothers creed project.... its a collection of words to curb out moral decadence in students

You did a great work. let me have your email address please

Yinkash100:
what ratio will i mix d sensitizer nd d elmusion. Both has no directions atall

hmmmm.. let me use a coca cola bottle as example. 5 cover bottles of emulsion to 2 cover bottles of sensitizer

Yinkash100:
i left it for about 20 mins. It was in d evening nd d sun was not so high

20 minutes hmmmmmmmn. try it again during the day and leave it in the sun for 12 seconds

Yinkash100:
i think maybe d mesh have dried up dats why d artwork did'nt transfer

well keep trying and you will get it right