₦airaland Forum

Own a full auto-assault rifle in Texas, and use it to light up any intruders that break into your home. The cops will show up to help you clean up the mess afterward, with NO charges filed for that act of self-defense.

Yeeeeeeeeehaaaw !

modath:
@Papiwata,
How can you justify your contempt for diezani and admiration jonathan in the same write-up? when its obvious to everyone that the singular reason for the impunity/ highhandedness/arbitrariness that characterized her actions is a direct result of jonathan's protection?
When the nass gave her a summon,who made it possible for her to flout such an order with zero consequences/repercussions?

In as much as I respect Jonathan and his assured place in history as a protector of democratic ideals, it was clear that Johnny made grave errors in the hiring of a few high-profile compulsive thieves like this Frog Eye Madueke woman, and ultimately, those critical errors in judgement played a decisive role in the defeat that Jonathan ultimately suffered at the polls.

modath:
@Papiwata,

Weren't you a staunch supporter of this administration(evidence attached) and you are now typing such a long epistle about the de facto prime minister of the present govt? God is watching you

https://www.nairaland.com/2099580/when-buhari-loses-again-what

Oh yes, I was, and to an extent remain, a staunch Jonathan supporter, BUT, I have also been consistent in my scorn for Ugly Maudeke the Frog-Eye Woman, due to her habit of brazenly FLAUNTING the embezzlement she was perpetrating as a member of the Jonathan government, and due to her penchant for chartering private jets to travel regular commercial routes, while billing the Nigerian treasury 100-fold the price of a first-class air ticket, each time she boarded those private luxury jets.

Take my word, the big hammer of justice WILL descend on this nasty Madueke Frog Eye woman, even if ALL other officials of the Jonathan government are forgiven for real or imagined acts of corruption while in office.

SirShymexx:
Didn't I tell you to stop quoting me, muthaphucka?

You need a Jesus-slap from pastor offering.

Chai ! Anywhere I land for Nairaland now, dem dey take cane drive me commot.

Wettin I do again now ? At least I don shange my cloth, take style join Buhari supporters club. Whey dem still dey flog me like this now ?

KingTom:
PapiWata how market since April 1st na?

If you see me as I dey now, you nogo know me again, because of how my neck don long like tolo-tolo neck, due to so-so hungry.

Even Mama Peace no gree pick my call again. I beg my brother send me credit make I explain am finish for you.

Kai Two Grammar man don jam densef today. Make I bring chair come siddon look fight, as referee concern.

SirShymexx:
[size=16pt]It's a fvcking Sunday - don't piss me off.[/size]

I think out man Shymexx is reminding you that your arms are too short to box with Jeesus, especially on a Sunday.

Wonder !

Sodiq3:
Haters, how market na?? Who should receive those Prizes now. Buhari or Jona?

I don line up wit dem for Abubakar Abdusalam house for Minna. I come beg say I nogo do so again. Say if to say I know, I for no commit.

Since the time when we Oga don enter president, any GBAM when I hear like this, na so I go begin dey run. Stress don nearly kill me finish.

I run go Jonathan him village for Delta, say make dem help me, but na cane and blanla dem take drive me commot there.

Man pikin no know which way to face again. I don change my cloth, change my house, change my number, change my work-place, change my car and change my wife self, but I still dey fear like how antelope dey fear for time of hunter, sotay I pass corner-corner travel go tanda for my village.

Billyonaire:
So, upon all the money, Abdulsalam's compound is paved with common interlocking stones not even granites. What is there to even show that it is Absulsalam's compound.

This woman has a successful career in the Oil sector and has piloted the affairs of the sector for almost a decade. She should be happy to be relieved of the tasking responsibility. Losers shouldnt make it look like is lobbying to stay. There is nothing more out there for her to achieve, she has done it all.

That's cool. The question of who will foot the bill for all those FREQUENT chartered jet rides for shopping in Harrods will no doubt be examined closely by government accounts audits in the new dispensation, bearing in mind that a Lagos/London round trip by chartered jet costs 100 motherfuggin' times more than the cost of a FIRST CLASS air ticket with any international carrier on the same route.

In the same vein, frantic efforts to erase incriminating fingerprints and footprints by our outgoing Frog Eye Woman will also be exposed as such in the fullness of time by meticulous investigation, at which point worldwide assets traceable to Frog Eye Woman Madueke, both hidden and "known", will be subject to government-mandated IMPOUND for refund back into federal coffers, while the nervous perpetrator finds herself summarily welcomed as a long-term "guest" of the government, in a secure location.

Perhaps if our Frog Eye Woman had not been so OBVIOUS and RECKLESS in her indulgence with that hedonistic champagne and caviar jet-setting lifestyle of the rich and decadent, she could have quietly flown under the radar after comprehensively looting 90% of all state funds that were entrusted to her signature as a government official, but in the end it has been that consuming vanity, arrogance and wanton conspicuous consumption that became the undoing of our amphibian-eyed female kleptomaniac.

Let justice justice run its course, Billy Boy. Frog-Eyed-Women who have looted public wealth need not fear jail, since they have enjoyed doing the crime, knowing full well that in so doing they attained eligibility for the reward of a fair trial followed by lengthy custodial sentence, at the pleasure of the judiciary now being fine-tuned to ensure scrupulous impartiality in the prosecution of ALL defendants about to be rounded up for "chats" with the relevant security agencies.

[size=16pt]Beware the Frog-Eyed Woman, for she will rob you BLIND, because ALL Frog Eyed women also carry the kleptomania gene sequence in their DNA, which COMPELS them to steal at every possible opportunity that arises.[/size]

Jail Frog Eye Madueke TODAY !

ceejay80s:
She fit don give buhari dog style like she gave gej and GMB will die the whole matter

Nah Buhari don't do sloppy seconds with no ugly asz ho'. He's getting his, so don't you worry on that count.

Onilaiscool:
innocent until proven guilty
stop carrying her problem on yr head

hater oshi

Guilty as charged m'am, and the problem is on HER frog head, for the avoidance of doubt. Yes indeed she is UNIVERSALLY hated, so there will be NO protest when she gets the handcuffs fitted for that one-way ride up the river.

Onilaiscool:
I cant believe you guys are being mean to this woman
I know her personally

shes from a good family
very well educated, humble, high achievers, disciplined, posh
everything a family shld be

one of her brothers is a big bishop in an Anglican church in the UK

We love you Dizeani, screw the haters!

She is a thief, and because of that we don't give a flying ffuck what you have to say in support of that criminal career.

If you know her, tell her not to bother trying to flee justice, because she WILL be tracked down and slam-dunked in jail on arrival in Nigeria.

She did the crime, so now please just try your best to shut the ffuck up and let her do the time in jail, even if it kills her. Bishop my asz.

Onilaiscool:
why harsh

shes beautiful

Your taste differs from mine, dramatically. I personally find the woman's appearance extremely UGLY, especially when I consider how much government money she stole, while under the illusion that there would be no day of reckoning for that criminal career.

Let her rot in hell. She is a colossal waste of money, and a waste of precious oxygen to boot.

Onilaiscool:
is buhari going to improve the jails condition

or just dump pple in prison anyhow

this new government is scaring me

You are alone with your fears. Most people won't bat an eyelid if this thieving woman is simply handed over to soldiers for disposal in the bush after a shot to open up that frog head explosively.

stevecantrell:
I just know a former PTF chairman like Buhari would love to see her roast in jail.

Who knows if GEJ has already used her as bargaining chip to secure safe passage for himself and PEJ. Hahaha !

One hopes that Johnny sacrificed this nasty woman in some way. Let her rot in a cell and be forgotten there. Each chartered jet she boarded to Europe cost the equivalent of 100 first-class round-trip airfares on regular commercial airliners. Those travel bills can be added up as the FIRST of MANY refund installments that should be made to the Nigerian government even as the criminal grows old in jail.

stevecantrell:
Billions can't just run with the wind like that. Return it promptly.

Buhari may skip GEJ but he will definitely treat you like a scapegoat.

For some reason female embezzlers tend to go scott-free even after they are spotted in Nigeria, despite the fact that they display rapacious greed on a scale very rarely seen with male offenders.

Lock that ho' up, toss away the key, then impound and liquidate every piece of property located anywhere in the world, that is proven to be associated with any person close to her. If compulsive, gluttonous thieves like this woman are given preferential treatment, it will be taken as a green light for ALL office holders to steal as much as they possibly can, in the hopes that they can go free by going to beg and make puppy-dog eyes in the offices and homes of those in power.

This toad-faced kleptomaniac woman really does belong behind bars in jail, for at least ten years with hard labor, as her reward for being one of the greatest thieves ever to get her paws into state funds.

vladimiros:
WHERE ARE THOSE MUMU Southwest WHO SAID OUR OIL IS NOT IMPORTANT..

UNA NEVER SEE ANYTHING....

HOPE UR COCOA DON RIPE??

Ha ha ha but but but dem don uproot the cocoa tree all, since 1972.


Abeg now, share ya oyel, as you dey take kindness do before, until the time when NEW cocoa tree don mature, after another 10 years, in 2025.

omenka:
It was a complete disaster oo my brother. Town service buses evacuated their passengers and started loading dead goats unto their buses. Had you been there, you would have felt really sorry for those traders. They were so helpless. Nigerians no dey try at all.

Not a single goat survived.

Very mysterious if you ask me.

Ha ha I suspect that all the "survivor" goats were killed by "sympathizers" who rushed to the scene. I pray make "sympathizer" no face me for Nigeria o.

Collynzo9:
I thought having a senate President from your place automatically solves all your problems. Why are they so hungry that they are stealing dead goats for food?

There is a big difference between STEALING and GATHERING EVIDENCE, as you are no doubt aware.

omenka:
Network seems quite awful. Will update later.

Ha ha ha Omenka don add "Graphic Pictures" to the title. Come and see how as dem go dey rush am now ha ha.

On a serious note, I have never seen so many dead goats since the last time I attended a marriage in the village. If the police do not show up in time to convey the dead goats safely to their wives kitchens for autopsy and burial in pepper soup, I anticipate there will be a mad rush of area boys, who will likely even butcher and share the meat on the spot, while exchanging blows and smashing windscreens of passing cars.

Omenka, as a precaution while you record more of these important pictures, I suggest you hire an Okada motorcycle to load the two goats that I asked you to reserve for me, and let him take my share away first, while you remain there to record the news for us.

Jonathan Goodluck was a very wise man indeed to QUICKLY accept the fair outcome of Nigeria's first biometric technology-facilitated, rig-proof presidential election. For that noble gesture, Jonathan Goodluck will enter the history books as the FIRST Nigerian leader to concede victory to an opposition candidate, and a man of great wisdom for whom there exists no higher obligation than the preservation of PEACE, and compliance with the concepts of freedom and electoral equality that are common to all modern democracies of the world.

By placing that historic phone call to incoming President Muhammadu Buhari, outgoing President Jonathan was also sending a clear message to the tribes of the Niger Delta, that their homeboy had broken the glass ceiling and reached the post of Numero Uno in Nigeria, and that now, after a hard but FAIR election battle well fought on both sides, the first Delta' born president was returning home in peace, thus paving the way for leaders of the future, from ALL tribes within the Nigerian federation.

If the reports in this thread are to believed, then clearly the criminal element may now seek to use the PRETEXT of anger over the results of the last election, to resume the theft of oil and sabotage of pipeline infrastructure. To ensure that the plunder of Nigeria's oil wealth at source is nipped in the bud, incoming President Buhari would do well to CONTINUE or INCREASE the cash compensation currently paid out to "former" Niger Delta militant groups.

Such payments made to communities in the Niger Delta amount to a flea-bite, in comparison to the daily dollar harvests that accrue from the export of crude oil drilled in the Delta, and, when viewed in the context of the massive destruction wreaked by decades of oil exploration on the Delta's farmland and fish stocks, a solid basis exists for indefinite compensatory payments of this nature to be set in stone, as a pre-requisite for LASTING peace in Nigeria.

I have seen the picture some people sneaking away with the goat. Stop them for me, I command you. They have NO RIGHT to remove that goat from the scene of that accident, until AFTER NPF Sgt. Okon has finished his investigation, with all exhibits taken to the DPO as a first step.

This is a serious matter, OP. You cannot simply hide behind your camera and record these crimes without doing something to stop the culprits before they escape.

You must leap into action NOW ! Stop the GOAT !

You forgot to include the phrase "Graphic Pictures" in your title. Please make that correction now, and that will guarantee at least 300 to 500 views by gore-fans in the house, before the end of the day.

Returning to the case of this goat, my suspicion is that the goat photographed was not dead or injured, but merely relaxing after a long day of eating people's laundry off the lines outside. Regardless, a Panel of Inquiry will now look into the IMMEDIATE AND REMOTE causes of the goat's behavior, in order to leave NO STONE UN-TURNED in the process of identifying and BRINGING TO BOOK all the usual culprits, after which the usual White Paper will be published, on The Panel's return from the official recess break in London, UK.

In conclusion, there is no cause for alarm, OP. I hereby authorize you to take custody of that goat, for onward delivery to me IF the meat is in fact still alive. If you only discover the animal to be dead AFTER you apprehend it, you of course are on your own, and may Lady Luck smile on you should that be the case. Amen.

"It ain't over until the fat lady sings", goes the old saying, and with the humble and statesmanlike congratulations issued just moments ago by outgoing President Goodluck Jonathan to his successor Retired General Buhari today, March 31st 2015 , it is safe to assume that the proverbial fat lady has indeed rendered her swan song for the curtain to fall on the Johnny B. Goode years, to make way for the commencement of Nigeria's "Buhari Years" for better or for worse.

For we armchair internet critics who did our level best to see Buhari lose again, the hour is now upon us to sheathe our poison pens and swords, in order to join hands with ALL tribes that comprise the amazingly resilient nation called Nigeria, so as to ensure that His Excellency President Buhari is accorded the respect he has finally earned after so many heroic and dogged political battles - Head of State, and Commander in Chief of the Nigerian Armed Forces.

Congratulations Mr. President sir. You fought a good fight, and a long one, without flagging for even a moment, through it all.

May your tenure in office be marked by times of peace, prosperity, and optimism.

NAMDOSKY30:
Hey seun remove this thread from here anybody will come and write nonsense no link nothing just on his own thoughts hey @OP pack ur rubbish comot for here

I want to see the link to validate your opinion posted above.

No link, no free speech for you.

By the way, are you one of Boko Hari's new ministers ? I ask because you sound very stern and angry.

GenBuhari:
The white man is very sly he would smile at you in your face and stab you in the back.

He would say one thing in public but do the opposite secretly, this way when elections are rigged they can deflect suspicion from themselves in having a hand in the rigging of elections.

Thief Obasanjo who would rather die than to hold free and fair elections that could bring Buhari into power, uses this strategy of playing to gallery of public opinion when secretly working to rig Buhari out.

The ability to lie in a polite and believable manner has never been the preserve of any particular race, El General. Africa is a good case to illustrate this truth, and suffice to say, "putting a spin" on the truth is not the preserve of any culture or tribe, given the wide utility of such adaptive skills.

In Third-World countries with recent histories of political oppression, such as Nigeria for example, the ability to instinctively fabricate a believable statement of falsehood, or to "talk oneself out of trouble", evolved by necessity, to gain respect as an enviable art-form that could double as a vital survival skill at any moment in the chaos of Africa's most populous nation.

Going further back in time to the African tradition of moonlight story-telling by the village's old and wizened to the young and naive, way back before the time of radio and television, the intertwine of fiction with poetically embellished truth is woven into the very fabric of African folklore, where even today that duplicity serves agendas both good, questionable and downright diabolical.

Be that as it may, there is no question that IF the semi-literate ex-tyrant Buhari is forced by "selection", on Nigeria's 150 million strong population as an imposed RULER, the anticipated Niger Delta "crude-oil weight-loss diet", and the subsequent impoverishment of Nigeria's single-commodity economy, WILL commence shortly after the customary public notices are served.

Buhari's open support for the concept of religion-based subjugation over Nigeria's SECULAR judiciary, from the Sahara Desert fringes to the Atlantic Ocean, alongside the documented 2011 record of Buhari urging paid followers to actualize his mid-election "prediction" to the effect that "blood would flow" should he face a third consecutive election defeat at the polls, are but a few of the recollections that will concern the civilized world, which in turn will be sure and leave on the table more options than are made public.

GenBuhari:
When INEC started announcing a 98% vote in Enugu as credible for an unpopular government that should have been your mood spoiler.
It was time for a reality check so that we can be with our senses when the shock comes and respond clearly as a people.

General my hat is off to you, because I GROSSLY under-estimated your intelligence in the past, and for a while there, was utterly convinced that you had lost your mind.

Now, with the benefit of hindsight, I realize how dreadfully wrong I was about you all along, because your reasoning faculties clearly rate FAR, FAR above average. Wow ! What a difference a day makes.


Now then, as my humble token compensation for my inexcusable lapse in judgement, I hereby offer my youngest wife for your boning pleasure, with immediate effect.

Take my wife, please, General. You is da MAN. I don dey follow you for back now o. I nogo insult Oracle again lai-lai forever.

ITbomb:
Is he more qualify than Obasanjo militarywise who could not stop militancy after 8 years, it took the peaceful venture of Yar'Adua and Jonathan to convince the militants.

Fire for fire will destroy the economy.

Buhari would be taking a risk of grounding the economy if he attempts power

You get sense no be small ting, my brother, but mumu people no dey like to hear true word at all.

plendil:
@JAkumo and Texaco, clearly beneficiaries of the GEJ's largesse to the creeks are clearly becoming panicky; hence the infantile, weed-induced, achingly empty threats. Yeye dey smell.

Well, a little encouragement: GMB, when sworn in as pres-elect, has not indicated any intention to discontinue the amnesty to your guys. So cool the f*** down!!

Oga please make you no mistake insult my weed o, because na original Ekiti State Golden Wonder Weed me I dey consult EVERY TIME before I type any word for this forum. And furthermore, no try to change my name, if you no wan make Oracle face you.

Oya, tender ya apology NOW, if you no wan see my vex.