₦airaland Forum

preshuzpearl:
@dcholeric. I don't think you understand what I wrote up there. Its people like you who makes things worse for people like us. You wouldn't mind if I took my own life? You even advise me to do so.
You know what. I would have done that long ago if I wasn't scared of the afterlife. I dont see any point in living if am not making a difference in the world.

Maybe people should start thinking that way. In that way we will be able to make reasonable decisions that doesn't include overpopulating the world and breeding children without having any good plans for them or to cater for them properly

Strange thoughts.. how many friends do u have

From you write up.. u have a family, u have a job, whats d issue exactly

I understand your points and i will like to ask u assuming u r in the West

What is the difference in this mentality between those who live in the West and Naija

This is linked to the first bolded


The second bolded is basic and i dont see why any woman will nt have a means of income aside her husband

BananaBender:
I erased the rest of your post because I agreed with it.

I don't know what exactly you mean by 'equality of cheating' but what I was proposing is that men and women should be held to the same standard when they cheat. Men should be responsible for their actions, it is not right that they are given a free pass by the society.

I am in no way, encouraging women to cheat.

The most practical way is to change the mentality that the male gender is superior to the female. We have to change the mentality that the man is the default head in a marriage. The truth is, the head is allowed some things that the subordinate isn't allowed. That breeds imbalance and equality.

Society should stop ignoring the men when it comes to preaching about chastity. Women are encouraged to be virgins but but the male child is perceived to be a wimp if he stays a virgin. This system will always fail because the male child needs the female(in most cases) to be a "man".

Women should be taught to be financially independent. A women who can't fend for herself is indirectly being forced to stay with a cheating spouse. Providing for the family should not be solely undertaken by the man.

A lot of things about the Nigerian society feeds on gender inequality and until that is eradicated, there is always going to be double standard.

if u r d one in ur profile.... u look too young to be even involved in such relationships

vivaciouzz:
yea,I know he was a cultist all dis while but I hv trying to save him from being known..only few pple know abt it..its not as if I got into a relationship coz of dat.I knew so many tinz I stopped him from doing like smoking.. I made him take his studies serious.. I really helped him..hez d quiet type n recently has been having issues with the school security, n I don't want to get involved dats y I want to leave ..d oda guy doesn't know dat I had a crush on him n hez loving me now..n hez in anoda school coz assuming hez in my school..dunno wat would hv happened to him n I didn't start my new relationship with se.x..I just wanted someone dats free from problems n who I can b with without being afraid dat something bad might happen to him

BrunoMads:
OP needs a long and thick Preek to reset her brain. ....

kolo
This is also something i thought of...i think she needs more of companionship and understanding..She seems to be alone/lonely

preshuzpearl:
The kids are innocent I know. Thats why I believe they shouldn't be brought into the world and allowed to suffer. U get what I mean?

By the way for those who talk about mental issues. I might agree that I Get depressed alot and am usually sad. But that has nothing to do with this. And I dont think its that disturbing @spotity

I have no serious traumatic experience so far that I can remember.

if the kids are innocent, why refer to them as hungry looking

preshuzpearl:
Both.

Men i understand

Marriage - strange .. even homosexuals and lesbians want to marry hence the basis of their campaign for marriage equality

So this is a man issue
Is the isue that strong that u harbour such anger towards innocent kids...product of marriage

bukatyne:
Tell me something!

But you believe wives must submit to their husbands and husbands are the heads of their homes which is a 'Christian perspective'

Eating your cake and having it?

I hope not!

Haba,... but u know its not only a christian perspective

afamgod:
Me no get tears for this kind husband oo.

yes... as should be
You are not related to the husband

DukeNija:
Don't worry ehn. When your lovely little son grows up and becomes a Man and he decides to marry a divorced woman with a child without the knowledge and consent of you and your husband. And then later reveals it to the family, saying no one can challenge him. Then you might understand how it feels to be on the receiving end. You think marriage is just between a man and his wife? Think again. Marriage is between families.

preshuzpearl:
It started when I was in the university. While my friends were having partners and getting into relationships I was breaking up with guys and not feeling a bit bothered by it.
When they talk about marriage I'm hardly interested. I thought maybe I was young that was why. Now I'm 25 and still not feeling like getting married. Infact the thought irritates me..I go to church programs and see children everywhere and am like why r these people getting married?? For what? Purposeless marriages. Just bring children into the world and leave them to overpopulate the nation. Hungry looking children everywhere.
Sometimes I hate myself for not understanding these things and why i can't be happy for others. I don't see any good in it. Can someone tell me why marriage is important? And please don't say companionship, chidren, or society. I care for none of those.
Secondly I began to think I might be (please don't judge me for this) homosexual. I know with nigerian culture and christianity, this is wrong. Even I hate the thought of it and will condemn anyone involved but lately I'm beginning to think it might be natural. If there is any possibility that I am one, I want to know so I can pray about it, do deliverance or something.

Please can u explain the bolded
You cant see any good in what,,..marriage or men?

Ok.. that is clear

My observation so far is that more and more women are coming out against infidelity in marriage by men
I think a punitive approach by women will act as a deterrent as cheating is a personalitything and equality of cheating is a weird concept

Polyandry exists and can be allowed as an alternative lifestyle
The question is will any man want to be dragged into a polyandric system

If women stop accepting to be second wives or more, polygny will cease


So what do u suggest are practical ways society can make the judgement on cheating the same

BananaBender:
*sigh* She said the society condones a man cheating but frowns at a woman cheating. Polygamy is legal for males by omission while polyandry isn't even a concept that is recognized.

Gender equality: refers to the view that men and women should receive equal treatment, and should not be discriminated against based on gender.

Gender equality is not suppose to be ignored in social institutions.

BananaBender:
Not even close. The society is me and you. You might not see the change in your generation but it will surely reflect in that of your kids.

Can you explain the correlation between cheating in a marriage and gender equality
I get the relation to equal opportunities, education, jobs, access to property.

Hmmmm....

Na wa...

How did u come to that conclusion

moca:
So pickabeau1 is obese,sambarry?
All right o
Another arsenal for moi
Will be handy one day

bukatyne:
The Nigerians are special
I believe Christians should build their inner man before contemplating marriage

I agree....
But like any human institution, marriage is also ssubject to imperfections

Ok.. thats good.. if u comment further, i will respond. nothing to add from me

bukatyne:
My apologies

I will go back to check; I must have missed it

I was referring to crackhaus

i fear .... .. since everything here could be construed as argument

No wahala...

bukatyne:
I have not deserted my thread however, I will not be drawn into roundabout arguements. That is why I made it clear that it is from a Christian POV

When other posters post, I will engage them and if you have anything to add, will be happy to discuss with you.

OK...I responded to u...and was awaiting ur. Comments Or thoughts

Why must u think its a about argument?

MizMyColi:
Your story lacks coherence and reeks of improperly cooked lies.

Yep

soonest:
Many of those things you wrote happening abroad are already happening in Nigeria

I don't think there is a prevalence of marriages where the man or woman seek intimacy via alternative means

Why do u think otherwise

cococandy:
Why will there be issues before?

You sef [] dwell in peace

There should not be any issues...take care

Guess we should all rest dwell in peace then

Obviosly that was to lighten the mood....It is well.....

Dwell in peace...

No issues..

cococandy:
As for you. Yes you. Face your front well well

Seems d op Has deserted her thread

I sensed it too...

But I'm facing my front

soonest:
did I hear you say not in Nigeria? Hmmh! U may need to take a survey. You will be shocked

And wat will be d result of d survey

coogar:
of course - the reality is more in line average widows to widowers. it's only in ijebu that the life expectancy of men is the lowest in the entire country. ijebu men must be strictly soldiers, miners or ebola-carriers to be dying in such appalling numbers.

Lol

Exaggeration..

damiso:
Coogaaaar be expecting words from my lawyers. This is defamation of character.
OP don't mind coogar o there are ijebu landladies because ijebu women are very industrious and buy and own properties in their own names as well..

Exactly....very industrious women

Go to mile 12, they own most of the shops there
Even in lagos island

rhymz:
Hahahahah.... I am going to go with Chris Rock on this one, a woman can spend her money on a man but only for a while, if she does it for long, she begins to feel like she is being exploited. It is just not in her psyche to be a provider for that long in a relationship.... Nothing dries up the p"$$y quicker than money coming out past the p$$y from her pocket to pay bills for a guy.... Lol.... Like there is a signal that goes to the p$$y that tells it that the guy is not worth getting wet for... Lol

Dayum.......

bluelover:
You wan twist my head abi

Well I agree that in most relationship nowadays sex is the main ish unfortunatly

Lol. So why u dey perambulate since
It is .... Just the way it is

Coogar u r exaggerating on your stats of 1 to 20
The reality is more in line with average number of widows to widowers

Feraz:
Lelouche Lamperouge vi Brittania, the 11th prince of the Holy Brittania Empire.

You all should watch Code Geass. You may then understand Sasuke better.

Wiegraf in the building!!! That was an interesting write-up btw!

Pickabeau1, Kishi na still my guy any day anytime. Of course, rasengan will always be the finishing move.

Have u watched code geass 2

Of course kishi Na ur guy...
Do you think it is easy to leave the infinite kishiyomi

RoyalRoy:
Wenger is a weird man.... He does the same thing over and over again while expecting a different result.. Quite sad!!

I tire...Lol

Yet he has some people who believe in him.. Even more sad

Feraz:
I was about posting the same link. If the above is true, then it's likely that there's going to be no flashback as that would consume more chapters. Also, I wonder why he's making it five. I expect to see new moves from both of them and not the boring rasengan and amaterasu we're used to (just like how Madara used limbo).

That being said, it's likely that some chapters will be released after the five main chapters. Probably a sequel to show how all will be faring (infact, it's gonna be released because I don't see how Hinata and Naruto, Shikamaru and Temari, Ino and Sai etc won't be shown with kids running all over the place and then Sakura just like Tsunade will be covered in the five chapters not to talk of other villages, the tailed beasts, the gokages, Orochimaru etc). Infact, there are many scenes to reason out which is why I somewhat doubt the news of this ending with the next five chapters.

Kishimoto is supposed to drag the title which he gave Naruto as the 'number one unpredictable shinobi' with Naruto himself as Kishimoto is not predictable himself.

At least, good news for pickabeau1 and Kimco that it's finally coming to an end...

Boohooo......

Why d hail

No be u and d azzpull crew dey lap all things kishi....

Now u r saying Enton, rasengan and amaterastu are boring?
You dare criticize kishi??

I also think 5 is too short..but let's see

Your second bolded is so funny...dattebayooooooo

Anything Toyota or Lexus... Good to go

coogar:
that's why the game is beautiful. chelsea beat liverpool & city last season but then lost to crystal palace & sunderland.

i bet you weren't laughing when you lost the title last season as you failed to beat teams whose total cost of their squad is less than the £50m you paid to sign torres.

now, that's funny!

LOL.....

ihedinobi2:
@pickabeau1, who says he expects a different result?

Wenger...without reinforcements in the middle of the park expects to win the premiership... Weird man

TV01:
I don't think we need worry about "real ladies" ! Let's be more concerned about our input as men.

I've noticed the "ponies" doing well. But they typically fall away. Infact, Arsenal epitomises the fast-galloping pony that ultimately can't keep up. Even I wince when I see them being ripped by Fabregas...it's just so unfair


TV

Let's see about that...fingers crossed


Costa has been immense and if his hamstrings can be managed has the potential to take Mou's little horse to the title

the over the top pass from Cesc was MINT!

And the takedown by Costa...superb..his control and his chip.. Wow