₦airaland Forum

EdCure:
I stopped laughing as you increasingly became unnecessarily partisan.
The best masterpieces are ruined by the slightest trace of bias and intolerance.

Actually, we are all partisan including you. Your hypocrisy is very much noted. Well done!

Besides if you call this 'moderate' one partisan, what will you have called Chapter One?

https://www.nairaland.com/2587245/acts-king-mumu-son-hari

WeedSeller:
Damn too long#..

I thought so too.
Will look at splitting it.

DaBullIT:
Anyone who speaks against the Son of Man can be forgiven, but anyone who speaks against the Holy Spirit will never be forgiven, either in this world or in the world to come.


And if anyone removes any of the words from this book of prophecy, God will remove that person's share in the tree of life and in the holy city that are described in this book

Can someone tell us what this one is saying?

Beremx:
the last one you wrote,you called PMB "mumu the son of hari" which didn't go down with me.

Eh, nevermind,I will read it later!

Hehehehe, PMB. Well, I can't recall mentioning his name in the last one. Like I said, I created a character and have rechristened the character. If you are happy or sad it's purely down to you. I don't have control over such things.

Beremx:
You called him "Bubu" this time around instead of "mumu". I think that's better.
I didn't bother to read anyway but I admire your posts.

Keep it up!

Hehehe, I don't know what you are talking about. I created the character, and have rechristened him.
By the way, how can you admire something you didn't bother to read?

My people food is ready

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EMANY01:
However much you can fit in will be fine.

exxell:
Also add Buharis' saintly ministerial list and finally, the struggles of Nnamdi Kanu for the sovereign state of Biafra.
Concentrate wella on the Northern appointments please and the terror being carried out by Buhari's kinsmen.... Boko Haram and the Fulani Carnage of Middle Belt

The deed is done. The saga continue...

https://www.nairaland.com/2647257/acts-king-bubu-son-hari

The Acts of King Bubu son of Hari Chapter 2: 1-32
1 And when the son of Hari the cattle rearer had become King over the people, he made a decree saying thus, “O good people hearken! Behold I am your King now. I am beholden to no one and I am beholden to everyone. Thou shall no longer call me Emperor, but thou shall call me King Bubu son of Hari. And lo, I shall not tend to the provinces in which nine score and seven in hundred stood by me same as I would tend the province in which only five in hundred stood by me. For different measure shall I apply for different people.”

2 And when the people heard his decree, they murmured among themselves saying, “Surely King Bubu son of Hari would pitch us one against the other.”

3 Whereupon King Bubu Son of Hari appointed Warlords from five provinces of the land and named them commanders of men, but he would not appoint any from the province east of the big rivers inhabited by the Hebro, for only five in hundred there stood by him to elect him.

4 And King Bubu Son of Hari appointed, from among his kinsmen and townsmen in the land of Almajirite and other provinces, men to serve in his palace and as right hand men: butlers, town criers, principals, chief scribe, councilors, quarter masters, house masters and several others, but he would not appoint any from the province east of the big rivers inhabited by the Hebro, for only five in hundred there stood by him to elect him.

5 But the people from the province east of the big rivers inhabited by the Hebro were not persuaded for they do not cower before men nor tremble before kings for their works speak for them. Thus did they address King Bubu Son of Hari the cattle rearer, “We cast our lots as our spirit led us in favour King Jonah son of Locki. Lo, we shall do same again if called upon!”

6 When the people lamented and said to King Bubu the son of Hari, “O wise King, may your reign be peaceful, and may you defeat all your enemies and bring prosperity to the land. O good King, you swore a covenant with us saying : ‘ Make me King in place of Jonah and in 100 days, and I will rout She-cow and his gang of terrorists from the land, feed yours little sons and daughter daily in our various temples of learning, and make our cowry equal in value to the mighty dollar! And your able men, I shall give jobs in our orchards, and ten thousand cowries to those without work.’

7 “O good King, we have kept our part of the bargain, fulfill your vow, that you may be freed from the bond of the covenant. O good King, kill She-cow and bring back our daughters and appoint also Masters to oversee affairs of governance.”

8 And the Keeper of Treasury also spoke and sayeth to King Bubu Son of Hari the cattle rearer thus, “O good King, I give with discretion cowries in exchange for dollars and dollars in exchange for cowries, that the mighty dollar may not completely overshadow our cowries, and ruin our trade with neighbors and kingdoms beyond the seven seas. Pray, O good King appoint ye Master of Coins and Master of Trade that I mayest counsel with them to help our cause.”

9 Wherefore King Bubu Son of Hari the cattle rearer answered and said unto them, “O good people, I did not promise to do a thing in hundred days. And as for the Masters, there is none worthy and holy as I am. Lo, I continue the search for holy men amongst you. In the fullest of time when I shall find them, verily I say to you I shall appoint them as Masters for you.”

10 Now the house - Alliance of Protected Crooks alsoo known by their initial - APC, was the most deceitful house in the land and several vile men swell their rank. Their banner has an insignia of broken broom held by a filthy hand.

11 Liar son of Momed speaks for them and he bore false witness against many, and he uttered many lies - great and small to the people of the land. Some believe him, and several others curse him for the lies he told. Lair the son Momed is said to have been born with a lying tongue.

12 He it was who spoke to the people saying “Lo good people, our great King Bubu the son of Hari body language has improved our power; his body language has done more in six weeks than Jonah the son of Locki did in six years. Rejoice and be exceedingly glad O good people for surely, King Bubu son of Hari’s body language will bring food to our table, oil for our lamps, fix our roads, and defeat all our enemies.”

13 Oshi the son of Omole, lover of exotic maidens also bear their standard and sometime speaks for house of Alliance of Protected Crooks. Yet he knoweth not whence to speak and whence to hold his peace.

14 Oshi the son of Omole it was who spoke to people saying, “O good people, the household of Emperor Omanman son of Balak of United World, had told me the names of those who looted our treasury and carted away at least six hundred oxen full of gold coins and precious gems. Whereupon the household of Emperor Omanman rebuked vigorously him saying, “Begone! We knoweth not what that sayeth for thou speaketh untrue words. We gave you neither name of who nor the number of oxen of gold coins carted from thy shores. Pray, tell where did thou hear this great tales, that we may inquire and enrich our knowledge.”

15 Roch the sly son of Cha also fly the standard of house of Alliance of Protected Crooks known as APC. He broke ranks with his kinsmen from the land of the Hebro. And when he had returned from the journey to the United World to visit Emperor Omanman son of Balak, he caused several giant tapestries depicting his handshake with Emperor Omaman son of Balak, with King Bubu Son of Hari the cattle rearer to be commissioned. Roch the sly son of Cha hung the tapestries in the city square with a message saying, “Behold what I have achieved, the new face of prosperity!”

16 Now there are other vile men in Alliance of Protected Crooks including Fanshi the son Olar who among others used several bags of cowries, much more than usual, to dig well for water in his official abode, and several more bag of cowries, again much more than usual, to tell the world what he did!

17 Amec the swift, son Chyi is another vile banner man of Alliance of Protected Crooks. He it was who took from his kinsmen treasury and gave several bags of cowries to the cause of King Bubu Son of Hari the cattle rearer wherefore Bubu became king.

18 And in those days, She-cow, who led the purveyors of terror and tormentor of the people who ravaged the land and slaughter the people, addressed the people saying, “I am She-cow the terror; the one who was, the one who is, and the one who is to come. News of my death is a lie told to deceive you by King Bubu Son of Hari the cattle rearer and his Warlords. By Hallah, you shall serve my god or become my slave, or I shall annihilate you.”

19 Now the commander of King Bubu men of war is a fearsome Warlord. He is called Bura the snake charmer, son of Tyia. When Bura, the snake charmer, son of Tyia, heard the word of She-cow, he flipped his cloths, push his chest up and down to show his muscles and mass of flesh. “She-cow and his band of brigands are noise-makers and cowards,” he declared, “I shall crush him, and all who stand with him.”

20 Then Bura, the snake charmer son of Tyia and his men ran around the city seven times, so that the people may know that they are strong and many in number.

21 Then Bura, the snake charmer son of Tyia and his men fell upon the tents and encampments of She-cow, and slew many who follow him.

22 She-cow fled with some of his men and hid among the people who are allied to his cause. Thereupon, She-cow and his band of brigands continue to ravage the land, plunder, maim and kill and disappear among the people who are allied to his cause.

23 And the wandering shepherds and tribesmen of King Bubu Son of Hari the cattle rearer, who had forge unholy alliance with She-cow and his band of brigands, invaded the fields of a retired Chief Scribe – Fala, the son of Aye in the land of Yoruga, who had allied with King Bubu Son of Hari the cattle rearer. Thereupon, these wandering shepherds laid waste to his fields, and destroy his crops. They took Fala, the son of Aye captive for several days and would not let home go until several bags of cowries in ransom had been paid. And they warn him sternly not to speak about them least they will come again for him!

24 And from across the big rivers, there arose another zealot, Nnam the Bright, Son of Kalu, and he addressed King Bubu the son of Hari thus “Let my people go!”

25 And when the price of a tuber rose from eight cowries to eleven, and a measure of grain rose from nine to twelve cowries, the people again began to murmur.

26 When King Bubu the son of Hari saw and heard all these, he was distressed. But he would not name himself Master of War even as She-cow and his brigands continue to kill, maim, pillage and take captives and spoils even close to his palace. Now King Bubu Son of Hari the cattle rearer would not make himself master of grains, tubers and cattle even as he possess great skill at cattle rearing.

27 But when King Bubu son of Hari saw the abundant milk and honey flowing in lands beyond the big rivers, King Bubu was exceedingly glad. "Lo, I shall appoint myself Master of Milk and Honey. I alone shall decide how the cows are milked and how the honey is shared for I alone is worthy”, he proclaimed.

28 And when the time had come, King Bubu Son of Hari the cattle rearer unveil #thelist of men whom he had found worthy to serve as Masters over the people.

29 Now these are some of men King Bubu Son of Hari the cattle rearer chose as Master over the people: Amec the sly son of Chyi who looted his kinsmen treasury. Fanshi the son Olar who among others used several bags of cowries, much more than usual, to dig well for water in his official abode, and several more bag of cowries, again much more than usual, to tell the world what he did! Another is, Liar son of Momed who bore false witness against many, and he uttered many lies - great and small to the people of the land.

30 Many were men who wine and dine with King Jonah the Able son of Locki, and some were the vile men from other houses who had sought safety under the banner and fold of Alliance of Protected Crooks known by the initial APC.

31 And when the people saw #thelist, there was loud outcry and gnashing of teeth in the land, and several people rented their clothes and put ashes on their foreheads to mourn the death of change! And they asked one another in loud groan, "What manner of change is this?"

32 And from across the big rivers, Nnam the Bright, Son of Kalu, again addressed King Bubu the son of Hari thus, “Let my people go!”

Continued from
http://www.hotchapters.com/

Chapter One:
https://www.nairaland.com/2587245/acts-king-mumu-son-hari

DISCLAIMER:
Similarities of characters portrayed in the text with anyone dead or living is purely coincidental.

Same of same. Nothing original, very banal and uninspiring.

Nothing has changed!

EMANY01:
I can hardly wait just get it published and let me enter a week of scary bouts of laughter and saddness.

I'd like to see your portrayal of the currents administrations (non)response to the escalating activities of boko haram, the portrayal of the escalated murderous activities of the fulanis , adding kidnapping to their already bloody resume of death and destruction, the continuing saraki saga and the ministerial list screening drama as well as the portrayal of the midget with tall lies and his confrontation with the ordinary commissioner.
I could go on and on and on if you let me....

That's a tall list. I'll try to fit in as much as possible. Perhaps a third chapter might be necessary.

exxell:
About Oshiomole and his diarrhea mouth, Rochas and his Obama shaking hand Billboard and the "Lopsided" Nothern appointments of Buhari.

hehehe, I will try.

igwedaboss:
Lol... True... but no painting, no instigations .. No divisions... Emeka solved japan's 40 year old math problem.. let's use that brilliance and solve this. God bless us all

The solution is simple - simplify the problem by dividing it into different components! It's the same mathematics.

exxell:
PointB part 2

Good news. Work in progress. Part Two of this would be available few days from now. What would you like to see? Make a wish!

OnReflection:
If you follow a lot of these cases, as I do, you would know that there are things that cannot be said until reporting restrictions are lifted.
The devil is not always in the detail, comrade Read between the lines.

13 Billion pounds is a lot of money. Anyone saying anything about such and mentioning name should provide details or keep quiet. There is no merit to the gossip as at yet.

igwedaboss:
Lol. I get your story. Funny how you had to use all those English at the end.. lok

Hehehehe, I know.

I should have simplified this:

It best now to initiate a controlled dismantling exercise, as the alternative is a chaotic implosion with possible attendant catastrophic human and material cost of the next generation or beyond!

to,

It's best we divide peacefully to avoid costly war.

But some clowns will say I'm instigating war, so I choose to paint the war, rather than instigate it!

OnReflection:
Come on PointB, I know we've had some major differences of opinion on matters of fiscal transparency but even I would credited you with more intellectual sagacity. I am afraid the conclusions you tabled are, simply, the result of your overactive imagination.



Now read the article once more and tell me what the potential known knowns are

If you call it an article then you give it more credit that it deserves. It's a three paragraph monologue banter very much akin to what most Nairalanders post here daily. It lacks substance, and not even worthy of reflective posturing.

Apparently, the 13 Billion pounds was plucked somewhere in speculative world, coloured with condescending innuendos, and plastered on a gossip column for whoever cares to read.

It's not worth hyperventilating over; there is nothing remotely intellectually stimulating about it.

I think the publication is baseless sensationalism. Why would an individual want to buy an apartment for 13 Billion pounds? Is appartment made of solid gold? In any case, such transaction would raise several red flags, with money laundry and terrorist financing topping the chart. Even a amateur thief know very well to split huge loots in several small piece before disposing them.

It would have been nice if the tabloid provided more detail to this sensational publication. It will take a lazy thinker to believe this incredible news, and fools that will run with it. Not biting!

igwedaboss:
Okay. Thanks for the insight. But there are countries which have found ways to make things work. Even if there is no country. We can be that country. I personally believe there are ways to solve indifferences and make unity reign, but the plan is never right. Anyways, thanks.

Thank you very much.

For such countries they appear to have similar ideologies or something that binds them together. In our case it simply oil - the control of it!
Don't kid yourself you can salvage this country built on such faulty foundation. The moment the oil runs out, there wont be any need for any of the oil producing parts of the country. The Ijaws will simply be reminded that they contribute nothing more, and Igbo will be told how their land is erosion ravaged among others. Yorubas will remind everyone who cares to listen that they are no longer ready to accommodate non-indigenes in Lagos, the commercial nerve of the country, and will move to reassert control. The Hausa/Fulani will simply use their 'numbers' to get whatever they believe they need, and also resort to mining other minerals. Those who didn't get much from their oil will rue their shortsightedness. Everyone will be in mad rush to re-adjust, and consequently the country will disintegrate.

The best time to re-negotiate the country is NOW. The structure will need to be change such that everyone will know why they are part of Nigeria and whether they want to continue being part, and at what cost. Anyone who want to make something meaningful of Nigeria base on the current structure is not a good student of history. Nigeria, based on the current structure, is doomed to fail. It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when. We are not ideologically compatible; we are destined to be several great nations, rather than a bumbling, retardedd giant!

It best now to initiate a controlled dismantling exercise, as the alternative is a chaotic implosion with possible attendant catastrophic human and material cost of the next generation or beyond!

simplycarro:
On my way to work this morning, I counted close to 15 luxurious buses from Ojota to Fadeyi filled with emigrating Igbos into Lagos SW Nigeria, are those one too asking to be left alone? I'm I the one begging that you stay with me or you are the one that is eternally attracted to my part of the country.?
Some of you guys need psychiatric evaluation.

Did you also count the buses that were leaving the South West? And how are you sure that half of them are not your people returning back from SE? In any case, did you realize the buses you see in the morning are actually heading to SE not the other way round?

Perhaps you should consider going for the psychiatric evaluation yourself as it appears your brain function in a mono-directional way!

simplycarro:
Be honest, who you have been doing this Baifran iish if GEJ has won the election?

During GEJ time, there were people actively canvassing for Biafra. If their voice is louder now, it behooves on the incumbent to find means to assuage their concerns. Whether such intervention would permanently address the issue surely is a different matter. But the issue of Biafra has been a recurring decimal for a long time. It didn't start because of the duara dullard!

igwedaboss:
This is sad..
There are still a lot of things I need to know about the emergence of the Biafrans and why they've taken this course.
The igbos are technically gifted. Why don't they use that and reinvest in themselves. Become the nation's great, rather than dividing the nation which might lead to the lost of lives. The past still haunts, what will the future then hold.

It's not a must to live together. Nigeria can survive without Igbos/yoruba/hausa, and Igbos/yoruba/hausa can survive without Nigeria. We have been trying to make Nigeria work for over 55 years, and it's simply not working.

We simply have to try something new rather than hoping the same approach will someday work. I envision a near future where those, having similar ideologies and having agreed to live together, do so in their own nation without let or hindrance.

The sooner we start facing this reality the better for all of us. Else one day, pent up anger and frustration will come to the fore like a volcanic eruption, and it might be too late to salvage anything of note.

The other owners are quiet. Only the owners that are from Mahammadus village in daura (the sexy guy) seem to be still believing. The ones from the West are scratching their heads wondering why they really CHANGED the former gentle manager that made them Number one destination for FDI in Africa when this change has sent them down to 7th.

Let them keep scratching their heads. They schemed against Jonathan because they think they were not represented enough in power. Let them fill all posts with their sales boys and girls and let's see how that pans out for them.

IsraeliAIRFORCE:
This epistle deserve International award and certainly resembles the work of our Noble Compatriot, PointB


Your writing style is evident in this piece.

Bravo and keep it up.

I think it's a good write-up. Kudos to the writer. But I have no hand, or pen in it by the way.

As soon as I have some free time, will write Chapter Two of Acts of King Mumu son of Hari.

Chapter One is still very much there for those who didn't read it:

https://www.nairaland.com/2587245/acts-king-mumu-son-hari

eleko1:
I'm IGBO from Nsukka.It is useless talk like dis make them pipu kal us Igbos/Yeyebos,red head lizards.U kal the same country u live in a Zoo?That mean U bi animal too.

They'll call you whatever they will nonetheless. But that should not stop you from saying your mind.

Personally, Nigeria is either a zoo or a jungle; it's clearly not a nation. Those hoping to see Nigeria great are justing wasting their time. Nigeria is a failed state.

dammytosh:
When you mention reality i laughed hard.

The last official CENSUS was in 2006 and it says Nigeria's population is around 140 million

Mortality and Birthrate is unknown.

That is behind RUSSIA in 9th position.

You are not making sense. It's not compulsory to post.

Oshigbanjo and co should come with a practicable economic blueprint for Nigeria. We are tired of plenty talks, while economy shrinks.

dammytosh:
None of the concerns were valid. Except to lazy thinkers

For the avoidance of doubt, the concerns are valid. Nigeria for starter is not 9th most populous nation in the world as stated by your principal, our duara dullard. If the duara dullard was was sure, he would have stated the exact figure to support his claim.

As a matter of fact, Nigeria population figure put Nigeria closer to the 7th bracket rather than the 9th the duara dullard assumed. So both you, the duara dullard, and whoever wrote the speech are lazy sods.

Below is more realistic link for population figures for the 10 most population nations.

http://www.internetworldstats.com/stats8.htm

@181,562,056 and 7th position, this figure is much closer to reality than the fictitious 135,031,164 which placed Nigeria at 9th.

wirinet:
Nigeria is the only country in the world where a stark illiterate feels he knows better than professors. Like the saying goes, he who knows not and knows not that he knows not, is a f**l.

Buhari's speech was written by competent experts and academicians, whom you are not fit to shine their shoes.

A simple google search would have illuminated your ignorance.

Nigeria is reputed to be the 9th most populous nation on earth - http://www.infoplease.com/ipa/A0004391.html

NCC is not a revenue generating agency? Please what school did you attend. I need to tell my friends and even my enemies to avoid sending their children to that school. NCC sell all sorts of licences, they collect revenues and fines from all telecomunication companies. They sell licences to TV and radio stations all over the country, and lots of other revenue generating activities. Even Internet service providers have to pay NCC for their spectrum.
See spectrum fees and prices here - http://www.ncc.gov.ng/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=85&Itemid=99

Here is one of the lazy thinkers.

You pulled a link which stated that Nigeria is 9th most population nation in the world. If you weren't lazy or perhaps disingenuous, you would have notice that the population figure given to Nigeria in that link @135,031,164 is far below our 2006 population figure.

That's how far you shameless lots will go to distort facst in support of your 'perfect' principal.


Below is the stat, 'professors' used to write the president's speech, a pre-2006 population figure.

Rank Country Population
1. China 1,321,851,888
2. India 1,129,866,154
3. United States 301,139,947
4. Indonesia 234,693,997
5. Brazil 190,010,647
6. Pakistan 169,270,617
7. Bangladesh 150,448,339
8. Russia 141,377,752
9. Nigeria 135,031,164
10. Japan 127,467,972

These are figures from 'competent experts and academicians.' I won't be surprised if they experts in cattle herding.

obailala:
Well I'm sorry, for me and many Nigerians, there's nothing wrong with the speech; it was a mere independent day speech and not some revolutionary announcement. If you think the speech should have been more bloated with 'stellar' ideas, then maybe you should bring up those ideas here for discussion and some way somehow, someone on this forum who's connected will get your bright ideas to the knowledge of the authorities. This administration is eager to impress, so I'm sure they would welcome such fresh ideas.

Hehehe, perhaps you didn't read me well the first time.

PointB:
That's his prerogative.[size=18pt] On the other hand, the duara dullard has plethora of special advisers, and if he prefers Ministers whose job it is to proffer sensible way forward.
[/size]
The Op raised a valid concern though, what the point of 'thoroughness' when end product is fraught with several of same or similar defect as previous ones?
Buhari doesn't seem to know what he's doing, and those around him are proving nothing but bunch of incompetent sods!

There it, big and bold.

I can't think for the dullard, he's got paid goons to do that. It's not my fault they are mediocre!

obailala:
The speech was concise and straight to the point... shortest independent day speech ever. I'm sure you would agree with me that we need more action and not speeches?... I do not need long speeches, his speech was perfect.

As for the 2 points the Op pointed out, the Op was wrong, there are no mistakes in the speech.

Concise, straight to the point and short is not same as refreshing, inspiring, with bold ideas. If this speech is your idea of perfection, I'm afraid mediocrity will find a comfortable resting place in your corner!

obailala:
I simply asked you if you agreed with the insinuations of the Op about the president's speech being wrong. Instead of answering the simple question, you proceeded to yap about lateness / thoroughness in appointing ministers.

Who exactly needs to be more thorough here?... Maybe if you spent 45 seconds to read through the responses on this thread, you wouldn't be making such quick conclusions based on the Op's erroneous assumptions.

If the President have severally been discribed as some one who takes his time in anything he does, one who pays attention to every detail, then this speech leaves much to be desired.

The above is the Op's final conclusion.

That much I agree. The speech leaves much to be desired especially as it's content is very much a banal rehash of old rhetoric.

obailala:
Are you okay?

Where is the connection between your 2 statements and the question I asked?... Why are you sounding like a nagging that can't even define what her grievance is?

You don't see the connection between two despite my emphasis on 'thoroughness' ? I must have overestimated your intelligence. My bad!