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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? (25169 Views)
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Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by Chi133(f): 9:57am On May 20, 2023 |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by Evilthetwin: 1:10pm On May 20, 2023 |
The internet. Hollywood. As well as an unchecked influx of foreign cultures, what do you expect modern Nigeria to be; a moral tower of babel?? Omoh, by 2050 single moms and dads will be the rave nobody to blame but our collective level of education as a society. Money's is the god, money's the government, money's is the purpose of life. 3 Likes |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by Goodlady(f): 11:40am On May 21, 2023 |
tiswell:Receive brain |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by Tiopii: 8:18am On May 22, 2023 |
godofuck231: Having a fruit doesn't make you owner of the tree. there are steps to be taken to own a wife and impregnating her isn't part of it |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by godofuck231: 6:51am On May 23, 2023 |
Tiopii:there's no way back , the life she carries is sacred , next time a man has to be careful where he puts his seeds |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by Olarewaju89: 7:31am On May 23, 2023 |
Jennyclay: Is like you are one the single mother because the pain in you is obvious. Sorry |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by Jennyclay(f): 7:34am On May 23, 2023 |
Olarewaju89:sorry for yourself!! |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by Olarewaju89: 7:40am On May 23, 2023 |
Jennyclay:
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Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by Cazzim(m): 9:01am On May 23, 2023 |
Jennyclay: is that why you ladys turns hookup? |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by blueAgent(m): 7:20pm On May 28, 2023 |
BlackyOne: True. |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by blueAgent(m): 7:29pm On May 28, 2023 |
brainycaleb: True, but you should also know that in many states in Nigeria like Bayelsa ,Delta,Rivers,Akwa ibom, e.t.c women take pride in having children out of wedlock and its common among teenagers and adults especially in rural areas. Most of them are not even literates or exposed enough, for us to conclude that it is exposure to Western and social media. 1 Like |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by blueAgent(m): 7:36pm On May 28, 2023 |
advanceDNA: So true. That dude is a learner. Good Parenting helps but it's only 60% of a child's behaviour . |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by blueAgent(m): 7:47pm On May 28, 2023 |
casualobserver: True, parenting helps but it does mean children cannot learn wrong things from outside the home. I hope you know their are children from single mothers not becos their mom was wayward but they are product of circumstances. I have an aunt that was a virgin till her early 40tees ,she got married legally had a kid, a son, then things went south, the men abuses her, does not take care of his child, beats her and so on, she left the marriage. This lady is devoted to God right from her teenage years till now, she met her husband in the church and it was agreed even by the church that they were destined for each other. Do you blame the innocent child for such situations? I hope you know there are many great successful ppl from single mothers. Although don't support single motherhood, but we must be carefully not to judge all single mothers or children as product of bad decisions. Life can be really unpredictable sometimes. |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by casualobserver: 9:30pm On May 28, 2023 |
blueAgent: There are exception that prove the rule. If you work hard you will be successful but not everyone who works hard is successful. A well balanced child raised by a single mother with an absent father is an exception, that they exist doesnât change the rule. By the way there are a lot of successful deviants, success does not mean one isnât a deviant. RKelly was successful but is ultimately a deviant so I am ultimately talking about well balanced members of society as opposed to success for success sake. I am not referring to widows here, a child of a widow is a child of love, your parent died is different from you were not wanted. When you are a child of a widow, you still have a connection to your paternal and maternal side. A child of a single mother is usually only recognized by the mothers family. A child of a single mother is a child who knows one parent did not want him/her. Do you know how damaging that is for a child? I know of a single mother whose daughter changed her surname to her motherâs as soon as she was legally able to. Do you know the pain that child must have grown up with, can that child ever have a balanced relationship with a man? She has Uncles around her but itâs never the same. I donât care whose fault it was that the parents had the child but that child is bleeped up. Thatâs the fate of many children of single mothers. Thatâs why the black community in America have a lot of bisexual/ gay emasculated men and their women continue the cycle of single motherhood. That is he epidemic we are bringing to Nigeria with all this single mother nonsense. Like I said there will be exceptions but they are the exception rather than the rule. Itâs like saying it is ok to be lazy because 1 or 2 lazy students in a class passed their exams. That kind of narrative ignores the other 20 lazy students in the class who failedâŠ.as expected. The only people I give a pass are children of widows. It is difficult to raise children with 2 parents, talk less of being the bread winner and raising a child all by yourself with the psychological damage of knowing you werenât wanted. Something will give and 90% of the time something does give. It may not be politically correct to say this but most single mothers are single mothers because they are damaged. Again not politically correct but if you get to 40 and have not found a man to marry you, you have a fundamental problem. If you wait to get to 40 to marry by definition you are not getting the best men because the best men for her age are either long married to women her age or will marry younger women. What kind of man marries a 40yr olld? Not the bestâŠthatâs the truth. By the time you are getting married at 40 as a woman you are fishing in the bottom of the barrelâŠâŠ.plus the fact that there is something wrong with you that you are unmarried at 40. People donât like to hear this but it is true. 1 Like |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by donkelvin10(m): 8:12pm On May 29, 2023 |
Most LADIES now prefer HO*K UP to DATING đ€ Once you type SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP NEEDED, No Response... But once you type HO*K UP NEEDED, they will FLOOD YOUR DMđ© What's this world turning into đ If there are STILL SERIOUS LADIES out there interested in a TRUE RELATIONSHIP, my WHATSAPP 09023630072 is available |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by blueAgent(m): 2:32pm On May 30, 2023 |
casualobserver: It's obvious you have a narrow world view. There a thousands of ladies who are good, chaste but yet unmarried at 40. Bad Character is not the only reason for many unmarried ladies. 1 Like |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by casualobserver: 7:24pm On May 30, 2023 |
blueAgent: If you are reasonably attractive and you get to 40 single as a woman, there is something wrong with you. There is a reason men have not locked you down. By 40 you have had many opportunities to find a man, why do men not want to marry you? It is not only about chasity or promiscuity. You can be a virgin and yet no man wants to marry you. It could be an attitude problem, an expectation problem, it could be you think you are better than you really are, it could be she doesnât know her level and she is looking for a husband at a level that is unobtainable for her levelâŠâŠthere are so many reasons. In the same way, if a man has not gotten his act together by 40 he has a problem. There is nothing like a "good" single woman at 40. If she were truly good, she would have been snapped up. Trust me when you get to know her intimately, you begin to understand why she is single. Do not confuse chastity with âgoodâ. If you are a virgin, but you talk anyhow or you are too fussy, you are the type that say I cannot cook for your husband, we share everything 50/50, you are a feminist, you dress any how, her career is more important than her marriage, you donât like to be corrected etc. I can go on and on, there are many unattractive traits women unknowingly display that rules them out no matter how good looking or successful they may be. The world of single matured women is filled with women who think more highly of themselves than the pool of available men. The more men you rule yourself out from, the less the pool of men that will even consider you. This is how so called âgoodâ girls end up single at 40. These bad or unattractive traits we often do not see or experience until we get to know then upclose. There is nothing like a good single girl at 40. Good girls are married latest 35. If you are not married by that age it is because there is something men see and run away from. A divorcee of 40 is a more viable partner than a single woman of 40. A divorcee is someone that some man has deemed worthy of marrying which means she has the traits men look for even though things did not work out..A divorcee of 40 will find a husband before a single woman of 40âŠâŠfact! Like I said people donât like to hear it but it is true. Itâs like a man saying he is poor because this and that, no you are poor because you donât have it takes to be successful. Everybody has an excuse, there is no shortage of excuses but your reality is your truth. Your mates are married, the ugly ones are married, the short ones are married, the fat ones are married even the promiscuous ones are married, the career ones managed to marry but you are 40 and single and itâs the worlds fault? Carry on with the delusions,. Delusion is the reason most women get to 40 and are single, they tell themselves anything to stop them from addressing their flaws and weaknesses. Again I repeat. Virginity is not an automatic passport to marriage. That you are a virgin does not make you "good". most of her mates who are married were not virgins. 2 Likes |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by blueAgent(m): 3:59am On May 31, 2023 |
casualobserver: That's a lie. I know a sister who is still a virgin till now, works in the church highly devoted in her early 40's the challenge she has is that each time a man proposes to her, the wicked powers in her fathers house would appear in the man's dream to threathen that man, am not telling you stories but real life experience of someone I know personally. So there are many factors that can lead to a lady been unmarried at 40, which might not be her character flaws. |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by casualobserver: 11:17am On May 31, 2023 |
blueAgent: Jesus wept. Let me share a secret for all you church people, church is a reason many women will never marry. You can do this church matter to a point where you are not attractive to a man. I remember a girl I met when I was still single, on the first date she was talking about pastor this pastor that, giving me conditions and telling me how she seeks advice and permission from her pastor on everythingâŠ.that was the last time I saw her. Nobody wants a marriage where you are competing with pastor, if it is God one can understand not pastor. To the best of my knowledge she is still single, still churching and I am married with 3 kids. I repeat for the umpteenth time virginity is not an asset, certainly not a guarantee of marriage , it can even be a liability. As for your story, these are the kind of stories women tell themselves to run away from the real reason they are unattractive to men. There is no wicked powers appearing in any dream, the reason why men run away from her is that she clearly always talks about demonic forces and that turns men away. Nobody wants to marry someone or live in a household where you turn to your wife and everything is explained demonic forces. Again I hope you are seeing the real reason she has not found a man. She does not take responsibility for her actions and blames othersâŠthis time the devil. You have just proved my theory about single mature women. They are single because they have problems. The irony of someone saying I have a narrow view of life and then coming here to blame the devil appearing to suitors for a womanâs failure to marry. Which man wants to marry that kind of woman, virgin or no virgin? I am a Christian myself but these Pentecostal pastors do more harm to single woman by messing up with their minds. 2 Likes |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by blueAgent(m): 3:35pm On May 31, 2023 |
casualobserver: You still don't get it, it was not the lady that talked about having about demons or been attacked, it was the prospective husbands who keep having such dreams that told her about the occurrence. Am not telling you a story, this is 100% true life experience. You think life is just about what one likes or want? I laugh, if that is true we all would have had our wishes come true. There are many ladies who are victims of circumstances beyond their ability if you have not seen I have. |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by casualobserver: 4:09pm On May 31, 2023 |
blueAgent: You have just proven what i said from the start...if a woman of 40 is not married, the problem is her. All you have written is the story of a woman who doesnt take responsibility for herself and blames others for her failures. Clearly we both agree that the problem is with the woman, i think we can agree that she is not single because of a lack of suitors. so we can agree that a woman getting to 40 and single is not due to a lack of suitors. Where we disagree is that I say the problem is of her own making and you are trying to blame everyone else except the woman. Whatever the case you have just proven that the woman get k-leg which is why she isnt married proving what i said at the beginning, if a woman gets to 40 and is single the problem is her. Like all 40 yr old single women, they have a problem that stops them from getting married, its never a lack of suitors. if you are a "good" woman one of those suitors will have snapped her up, nobody lets a good thing go.....if they all run then she is not "good"...simple. Look, i used to have one long term reliable back in the day that told all her friends that the reason we didnt marry was because my mother did not like her but she has never met my mother, my mother does not even know her. The truth is she was never even my girlfriend, we were "helping ourselves" and she always knew. Whenever she found a suitor she would tell me and she would go and when it doesnt work out she will come back. her mindset was that it was better for her to be knacking me when she doesnt have a boyfriend than to be knacking around, it suited me so wetin concern agbero. The irony is everytime she went into a relationship she would always leave and her excuse was always the sex wasnt good. I would never tell her but in my mind I was always thinking this girl is not a serious person...she spent her youth looking for the wrong things in a relationship. this is an example of women having the wrong mindset. if she had the right mindset all those years ago, she would have been my girlfriend not my reliable side babe, there is a reason i never commited to her in a relationship outside sex despite the fact that she comes froma decent home. She never had the qualities i sought in a wife, she is also still unmarried, so it is not just me that didnt see her as wife material. Women always make up stories to hide their shame. Were you there when all these men said they are having dreams? has it occurred to you that it is something in her personality, character or mindset that made all these men run away and to hide her shame she says these men have dreams? Is this not another example of too much brainwashing by pastors such that we blame everything on spiritual forces instead of taking responsibility? The problem with Church singles, is that when people like me tell you the truth, you dont listen, you prefer to be brainwashed by pastors who have a dubious interest to keep women in bondage. if you are doing something for 40 years and you dont get results, what you are doing is clearly not working. unfortunately for women by the time you get to 40, there is very little hope and the pastors will just continue to feed on your desperation. I am a christian, the people that brought the christianity to Africa do not do christianity like we do. keep deluding yourselves. like I said delusion is the primary reason women get to 40 and are single. 2 Likes |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by blueAgent(m): 4:24pm On May 31, 2023 |
casualobserver: You are tiring, how is that her problem? Was she the one that had the dream? Did she create the dream in the minds of the prospective spouse? It was the men that told ppl and we, about their experiences this happened the first day of introduction and both parties meeting for the first time, so you claim that it was the ladies bad character. To be more precise. The man was directed to that family as a family were he can get a good wife, and on going there he met the parents without meeting the lady in question but was very pleased with what he saw. It was the night after that vist that he had those dreams. You are inexperienced, talk like a kid, I bet you have Little life experience. stop seeing life from your eyes or lens alone. Life is deeper than that. It's arrogant of you to assume you know better than someone in an experience you know nothing about. |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by casualobserver: 4:27pm On May 31, 2023 |
blueAgent: you are delusional, did the men tell you they had dreams or the woman. because if it is the woman i can tell you 100% she is lying, she is only lying to cover up her shame of not being to keep a man!!! 3 Likes |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by Bostin(m): 5:27pm On May 31, 2023 |
casualobserver:You're right , women can do anything to hide their shame or blame someone else . |
Re: "Single Mom" Epidemic: Who Is To Blame- Men Or Ladies..? by blueAgent(m): 9:32am On Jun 01, 2023 |
casualobserver: It was the men, that had the dream and also shared the dream to us. |
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