bettyLad:
just wondering how can a 24years old boy control a woman who's almost 30.

I don't get you is marriage about controlling?

You should know that if a man has earned a woman's respect she would respect him regardless of who is older.
There are cases in which the man is older and the woman doesn't respect him.

To me the problem is not her age but yours, marry at 24 where be say na the woman get money pass. My brother loving and lovely is just a feeling that can wash off at any time before law of life take it place.

At ur age i had a girl that gave me everything, all i thought was her but today it's clear to me that i should be chasing my own money and not looking for an older woman pant

Probably ur mum has interest in your fiance

In this Buhari era Abeg gimme her number... I'm in love already

prechbills1:

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please I need serious advice. I can't afford to lose her
.not now ,not ever.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Is your mother the one entering the marriage if not the two of you.
As long as you love her go for her.

The day she will tell him the source of his livelihood will the love defend the words. Women are emotional and does not think before they act,so never you anchor your livelihood on a lady wealth. You are bound to be wretched 50-50. Marriage goes beyond love. After 3 years some fantasy evaporates, the real thing sets in...coping tolerance replace fantasies etc

MissRaine69:

Why does it have to be about control? A marriage cannot be mutually beneficial or it has to be a master and slave sort of arrangement to be called a marriage?

I thought I was the only one who quoted her.
Seriously the lady is funny but it is her opinion.

Ladyhippolyta88:
I don't get you is marriage about controlling?

You should know that if a man has earned a woman's respect she would respect him regardless of who is older.
There are cases in which the man is older and the woman doesn't respect him.

that's not the case here, if the boy is 30 and the girl 35 then no wahala but boy is barely a man

shugamummy:


The day she will tell him the source of his livelihood will the love defend the words. Women are emotional and does not think before they act,so never you anchor your livelihood on a lady wealth. You are bound to be wretched 50-50. Marriage goes beyond love. After 3 years some fantasy evaporates, the real thing sets in...coping tolerance replace fantasies etc

Not all women are like that I know of women who are financially capable than their husbands and I have not heard of any who has insulted the husband.
And who told you that men are not also emotional and some don't think before acting?
All these stereotypes self it's just insecurities that is all.
There are women who have helped their husbands make it in life through their money the ladies wealth.

Ladyhippolyta88:

I thought I was the only one who quoted her.
Seriously the lady is funny but it is her opinion.

True some view marriage as servitude

prechbills1:
My fiance and I have been dating for the past 3years. I attained 24 last week, I wanted to get married to her last year but I just wanted to wait till I attain 24.

The problem I have now is my mom. She is opposing our marriage because my fiancee is 5 years older than me, I'm 24 while she's 29. My dad has already endorsed the marriage, I'd have liked to go on with the marriage but I don't think going into marriage without both parents blessing is sensible that's why I need my mom's blessing and endorsement.

My fiance has good character, she's very kind and intelligent, I can't afford to lose her because of pressures from my mom at least I'm an adult.

I don't know what's happening, my mom endorsed our relationship but she doesn't endorse our marriage just because she's 5years older than me. The thing is, I can't leave this lady ,not now not ever, she have done so many things for me.

in fact she even promised to provide 80% of the things needed for the marriage!. She is rich, yes she is, the house I'm in living in now belongs to her, I moved in with her in 2016.

The truth is I love her and I can't afford to lose her because of my mom's wish. Both her parents and my dad have given us go ahead for marriage but my mom still doesn't want me to marry because of age and my fiance is beautiful.

I don't know what do now ,that's why I think I need advice from you guys,.I don't know if I should go ahead with the marriage without my mom's endorsement/blessings.

please advice

.

There is no such thing as free meal.

Enjoy it while it lasts. When she answers a "Mrs" after the wedding, you will run back to your mother with
your tail between your legs.

Marriage is different from dating. Enjoying the leeching while it lasts.

/

Ka chi gaba, ring her abeg

EMMAUGOH:
that's not the case here, if the boy is 30 and the girl 35 then no wahala but boy is barely a man

That was not what the lady meant.
And what is your definition of a man?
Every one time is not the same he could start making it when he is in his 50's,20's,30's etc.
Time waits for no man.
The earlier the better.

prechbills1:
My fiance and I have been dating for the past 3years. I attained 24 last week, I wanted to get married to her last year but I just wanted to wait till I attain 24.

The problem I have now is my mom. She is opposing our marriage because my fiancee is 5 years older than me, I'm 24 while she's 29. My dad has already endorsed the marriage, I'd have liked to go on with the marriage but I don't think going into marriage without both parents blessing is sensible that's why I need my mom's blessing and endorsement.

My fiance has good character, she's very kind and intelligent, I can't afford to lose her because of pressures from my mom at least I'm an adult.

I don't know what's happening, my mom endorsed our relationship but she doesn't endorse our marriage just because she's 5years older than me. The thing is, I can't leave this lady ,not now not ever, she have done so many things for me.

in fact she even promised to provide 80% of the things needed for the marriage!. She is rich, yes she is, the house I'm in living in now belongs to her, I moved in with her in 2016.

The truth is I love her and I can't afford to lose her because of my mom's wish. Both her parents and my dad have given us go ahead for marriage but my mom still doesn't want me to marry because of age and my fiance is beautiful.

I don't know what do now ,that's why I think I need advice from you guys,.I don't know if I should go ahead with the marriage without my mom's endorsement/blessings.

please advice

before you make a decision, you have to first collect your thoughts and be sure you're marrying the lady and not her money.
and also be sure that if and when she grows older, you'll not start to cheat on her.
after ascertaining these, you can go ahead and marry the lady in question. You should have a heart to heart talk with your mom though, make her see why it's good for you to marry the lady.

By the way, it's sexually more compatible for most ladies to marry younger guys, when ladies grow slightly older, the average sexual appetite tends to increase, meeting up with the younger guy's sex drive.
all in all, Good luck

Op you be thief,barau, onyori, oleeeeeee

Ladyhippolyta88:

Not all women are like that I know of women who are financially capable than their husbands and I have not heard of any who has insulted the husband.
And who told you that men are not also emotional and some don't think before acting?
All these stereotypes self it's just insecurities that is all.
There are women who have helped their husbands make it in life through their money the ladies wealth.

You are not yet married if not you will understand. Marriage is dangerous for kids. If you are not matured in mind to be able to manage a woman emotions,desist. Forget backing ur claim about few men who misbehave. 99% chance that the lady will use abusive words one day. If you hear what my neighbour wife vomits from her mouth you will wish the man to commit suicide. So if you can't feed yourself,dont walk the talk. Besides slay queens of these days are not fit for motherhood. The mum who has coped with the Dad has seen something and says NO...it will not work....Listen to her.

prechbills1:

she'd only provide 80% of the things needed for the marriage, I'd provide 20.

I don't know why you guys reason this way

You mom dey save you plenty heartache. It's clear that you re inexperienced. It's not even the age gap. It's the fact that she's going go be the breadwinner. And you re very comfortable with it. It's only a matter of time before she begins to make decisions you re suppose to make. Or put simply, begin to overrule your decision as family head. Think three times. If you can't, ask those who are into it.

Ladyhippolyta88:

That was not what the lady meant.
And what is your definition of a man?
Every one time is not the same he could start making it when he is in his 50's,20's,30's etc.
Time waits for no man.
The earlier the better.

A man is in the heart. Some became men at 16,others at 20. Some at 30, Many by 40....some boys will never become men.....just like not all girls are fit for wife or motherhood

ibolomo:

before you make a decision, you have to first collect your thoughts and be sure you're marrying the lady and not her money.
and also be sure that if and when she grows older, you'll not start to cheat on her.
after ascertaining these, you can go ahead and marry the lady in question. You should have a heart to heart talk with your mom though, make her see why it's good for you to marry the lady.

By the way, it's sexually more compatible for most ladies to marry younger guys, when ladies grow slightly older, the average sexual appetite tends to increase, meeting up with the younger guy's sex drive.
all in all, Good luck

he wants to marry her because of her money while she wants to marry him because he is the only one available. No love at all between them

shugamummy:


You are not yet married if not you will understand. Marriage is dangerous for kids. If you are not matured in mind to be able to manage a woman emotions,desist. Forget backing ur claim about few men who misbehave. 99% chance that the lady will use abusive words one day. If you hear what my neighbour wife vomits from her mouth you will wish the man to commit suicide. So if you can't feed yourself,dont walk the talk. Besides slay queens of these days are not fit for motherhood. The mum who has coped with the Dad has seen something and says NO...it will not work....Listen to her.

Madam I am not arguing with you.Everyone has their experience what does my status have to do with this?I see married people every day.What may work for A might not work for B.The lady and the guy are the ones planning a future here not the mother.
It is going to be their own experience not the mother or ours so they should and not all women behave the way you painted them.

shugamummy:


A man is in the heart. Some became men at 16,others at 20. Some at 30, Many by 40....some boys will never become men.....just like not all girls are fit for wife or motherhood

I agree with this.

Don't be naive bro else she'll turn u to her house boy sooner or later.

Arondizuogu:


Lol. If you like someone and they like you, then I don't see why not?

right!! Thanks!

If ur so called fiance is not rich, and she's five years older than you, would u still want to marry her??

VictorRomanov:


You mom dey save you plenty heartache. It's clear that you re inexperienced. It's not even the age gap. It's the fact that she's going go be the breadwinner. And you re very comfortable with it. It's only a matter of time before she begins to make decisions you re suppose to make. Or put simply, begin to overrule your decision as family head. Think three times. If you can't, ask those who are into it.

Some people and their mentality.
Seriously this your advice is not helping.
Her being the breadwinner today or him being the breadwinner tomorrow is not what matters it's how they plan their lives.

Move into a woman's house? Count me out.

Gold digger

@Op
Please listen to your loving mother. From your story marrying that lady will definitely be a mistake u will regret all the rest of your life. Please forget love, marriage is far beyond this your infatuation called love. Am advising you from experience.
1. Ur too young for marriage
2. She is to sponsor 80% of d marriage, that means she's d one marrying you, and wow besides any man married by a woman.
3. U live in her house and obviously she finances you, please listen to one igbo song; ara gbagbue papa jasman because na woman dey feed am.
4. She is too old for you. Look for ur primary school female class mates today and see how u look like their little cousin, let alone 5yrs older than u

Cadec007:
right!! Thanks!

You go!!! Don't be afraid to approach her

Enoma222:
my advice to you is dat ...she must respect you ...as a man. let her know abt it ...also watch out for her character if she get angry easily .....

You don't demand respect, you earn it.

The funny truth of the matter is that at the end of the day, you will get married to the lady... Not she getting married to you,
The worst of the matter is... The lady will need you only to concieved, be it a boy or girl, at least that is the possible purpose of getting married
The scatter part is.... You will become useless and voiceless like those who voted for Buhari at the end of the day and your dignity will be like the left over garri-water after they Must have finished the real garri.
She is rich, you cannot take her to court, you will not be allowed to be in possession of your kids, and finally, she will start a dog business in her compound. I. E, you services are no longer required.

Ladyhippolyta88:

Not all women are like that I know of women who are financially capable than their husbands and I have not heard of any who has insulted the husband.
And who told you that men are not also emotional and some don't think before acting?
All these stereotypes self it's just insecurities that is all.
There are women who have helped their husbands make it in life through their money the ladies wealth.

Being a breadwinner,sponsoring 80% of marriage by woman is a no no in marriage. If you earn more than your husband it's different. But providing for the husband is a no no. Bible admonishes on that,...