₦airaland Forum

ibechris:
See if u like fine,if u like no fine...If I like your business sense and discipline as a woman,every other thing na rubbish.

Because I can wash,I can help u to cook,I wash your clothes as my wife...I bath my children regularly,who says is a woman's job?

I don't just write this here to curry favour from the ladies,but that is just me at home. I wash dishes at home times without number,even my nanny sometimes gets scared about her jobs.

Men should stop setting standards because if u push a lady to pretend along and u eventually marries her,u are a gonner,then u will see what u never bargained for in the marriage.

This would have been absolutely none of my business but since you made it a public statement and thereby advocate it as a standard for your readers to imbibe, I'm obliged to make my point.

Now, to the emboldened as highlighted; you need to let your wife have the dick dangling purposelessly in-between your thighs since you picked her for her business sense and she probably picked you for your domestic sense.

What a Wuss!

UyaiIncomparabl:
Lol..

Oga, face the topic and stop capping with your vocabularies here. Like I care. LMAO.

I already did!

postmann:
It's not worth the while sifting through the load of pink-lettered, hormonal drippings laced in the crap you called your opinion. If you're not satisfied with your gender by birth, reassign yourself and get a dìck and come into a man's world let's see how you measure up.

UyaiIncomparabl:
I saw this topic on Facebook and it makes me question myself asking what "Nigerian men want". It irks me so bad.

Women have been debased to NOTHING that a chore has become a yardstick in choosing a wife. I keep asking myself if God did not make a mistake to have given the headship to them from the beginning.

And now, I'll reiterate this here. I also don't care about the reactions it brings. It's not my business how you feel but I must say this to men- DO NOT SET UNNECESSARY STANDARDS THAT YOU WON'T MEET. Read that again. Would he have washed the girl's father's or mother's clothes if turns were switched? NO. Many men here won't either. It degrades them after all. ONLY women should cower and wash g-pee tanks because they want to marry. Marriage only favours the women after all. It's the women who do these things I blame. You don't rate yourselves.

If you try this with me, I'll FAIL your test woefully. It is the audacity to make this a post for me. They make marriage seem so unpalatable and dramatic.

Manners should tell you that you do not sweep when a guest is around. It is ABSOLUTELY rude and that shows that you do not even respect me enough to have kept your abode neat before my arrival. And that to me, is a RED FLAG!

It also tells me that "I am not welcome in your abode". I am immensely glad that the girl in the story dodged a bullet. Good riddance.

Signed; Bitterleaf Feminist.

Where does one begin to address your folly? Is this a sincere submission or just a gateway to draw attention to yourself? Your bare-chested DP seems persuasive of the later. And then, "you want to eat your cake and have your pancakes back." Your profile provides a brief but conclusive psychoanalytical evidence of your temperamental makeup.

It's not worth the while sifting through the load of pink-lettered, hormonal drippings laced in the crap you called your opinion. If you're not satisfied with your gender by birth, reassign yourself and get a dìck and come into a man's world let's see how you measure up.

You thought if GOD made a mistake.... the sheer arrogance of an earthen vessel who can't even manage her monthly crimson inconvenience....

Raspberries:
Bad advice... Africans are damaged thanks to this mentality...

You mustn't suffer to be responsible... Compare yourselves to your mates in the West...

Your independence was borne out of a need to survive... Your father messed you up... Cause his father treated him bad, he did the same to you? And you think that's normal?

Children should grow in a home with supportive parents who help them transition into adulthood... Not abandon them...

And the op mustn't reconcile with his father... If someone doesn't love you enough, then you let them go...

A father who watches his children suffer is irresponsible... There's no excuse or reason for his selfish actions...

There's nothiing particularly African about deadbeats. The West has a huge share of irresponsible parents, and can encourage independence from children even as young as 18, who are legally permitted to leave their parents' houses at that age.

While we hold no brief for irresponsible parents, having one gives one an opportunity to strive for independence, to work hard and make a means of livelihood early enough. There people holding their own financially who either had no parents or sponsors but looked beyond those challenges and used it as a fulcrum to aspire.

Drop the hate, (same for the OP) and focus on yourself. You owe your parents honour, no matter what. Soon enough you'd find out.

OP, you sure have a point. She's like the 3rd person ever present in a marriage supposedly for two.

Such frequent daily calls can not go on without sensitive/private aspects of your marriage creeping into their conversation. Just not possible.

However, there is hardly an amicable way you can bring this up without hurting your wife's feelings or sounding paranoid. But make no mistake, you have a solid point.

Advice: be patient, and wait a while. Your wife will either carelessly or willfully divulge sensitive/private info that's supposed to be just between the two of you to her mum. And you'd get to find out one way or another. You can then state your case of her mum always been a nose length away from your home and private affairs.

Mide70:
Please I need your opinion on this issue.
Though before I got married I discovered my mother inlaw calls all her daughters both married and unmarried everyday(only 3 ladies no boys) and they fear her to the bone. at times every morning and night just to talk to them but I believe when they get married they need privacy and respect but this is not the case for my mother-in-law and I detest such act
Mind you I'm not against call or trying to break the bond but I believe this is marriage. I'm looking for a way to stop all that . I'm I wrong or right to take that step ?

Doubleoh7:
The Economic and Financial Crimes Commission is threatening a jail term of 15 years for landlords that give their properties in rent to yahoo boys. In a message from their official twitter handle, inviting the public to their next EFCC Connect, an open forum where they discuss with the members of the public, the message reads;

Okay now! What a juicy topic! E go sweet wella! Landlord way yahoo-boy dey stay for him house, my people, na 15 years imprisonment for the landlord o! E don set!
See the details of the public forum below, for landlords that will want to attend. Let's see how they intend to prosecute this and send landlords to jail for 15 years.

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=pfbid0seWDmmErKXYGqZYJxNtuC69ybeUHu2rwAdhKXn68ysgFmDonBz2jXXx8pYotsvGTl&id=100064596373289

First off, EFCC has no powers to sentence anyone. They can prosecute but it is the court that decides and what length of sentence.

The EFCC is nothing but a crude, unintelligent, corrupt, power drunk and abusive morons whose powers need to be further curtailed.

toujurs:
as in ehn just people who have no experience would just come here to drop comment like they are mad, just imagine what that idiot is typing.

He doesn't even know if he would be able to feed himself in the future not to talk of feeding a family. Some people just feel that any man that finds it difficult to feed his family is lazy, forgetting that circumstances occurs. Circumstances a common man can do nothing about, but just needs the support of his family and close friends to bounce back.

People with no experience you say. A lot of giant presumptive strides from a fool with a pre-conceived notion of failure, inadequacy and MASCULINE LIABILITY.

With a pentium 2 graded wavelength encoded in that hard mass of stone you mistook for brain, you definitely missed the part where I said should he ever run into difficulties, he should look to other source of help outside his wife? That's clearly an admission that life can be bumpy. So, why so threatened as to rain expletives?

Let me guess, just like a woman (though you have two malfunctioning, testosterone-deficient sacs filled with pus tucked in-between your rather flabby thighs) you'd look beyond other feminine qualities of a woman, and cast your dirty, bulbous eyes straight into her purse, trying to figure her financial worth before considering a future with her, won't you? Dirty closeted male leech. You're the evidence of Man-cession. I know you'd speedily advocate for the eradication of bride price. You like free pussies and freebies don't you, bloody Ponce?

But you're the idiot, an effeminate doofus who hasn't earned the right to be called a man; a lazy oaf who'd shamelessly ask his fiancée to meet him half way around the bride price crescent.

You should bear your mother's name and let your father's quest for a true heir begin.

ebuka10box:
80 characters ohhh.....outside and married( had to cut words for d title to fit in)

There are other ways to concise or shorten your header than employing an outright sub-colloquial/unintelligent spellings. I wonder how much lower the bar would drop for standard spelling of words especially In a public space where all types of people and disciplines can access. It's a real pity.

Mariangeles:
Well, thank god it's an animal then.

Noted!

ibechris:
Your opinion.

Wait until u get married...no be mouth � na time and situation dey determine how far. Just pray make Nigeria no happen to u.

Wait? Why should I? Are there no males you know or at least from within your extended family who provide these basic needs for their families?

Your opinion, though defeatist in nature.

cococandy:
Tell me more since you know my finances so well.

Pray tell, which bridge or incomplete building do you think I’ll move into if I end up being the one to provide solely for my family.

I mean according to your logic, I’ll sooner be homeless than pay for my family’s upkeep. No?

The probables are your creation and yours to feed. Hardly interested.

It's past midnight here and I'm late for the sheets already.

Happy dinner and please keep that charming smile going each time you welcome hubby home from work while helping him with the briefcase and undo his tie . A rare darling of a wife you.

Bye.

Kobojunkie:


Be like say that "Head of family" crown na do or die e be so.

It's called knowing your basic responsibility and ensuring you don't fail.

cococandy:
Very unrealistic.

The things misogyny will make y’all say

Most probably it's dinner time for you and I trust your culinary skill makes your dining table one of the most favourite spots in your home. They probably tap their fingers on the table in an excited anticipation while waiting for you to turn up with the HOME MADE goodies from YOUR kitchen.

Hubby provides while you make the home. You wouldn't switch roles for anything, social media feminist rants regardless.

Ebus12:
Dear diary, Congratulations from all walks of life has been pouring in for Mercy Chinwo, since yesterday, when she announced the engagement to her man..
I too, congratulated on her instagram handle, but I will be a very conscienceless liar, if I tell you, I am truly happy.
Not like, I'm a witch.
Not like I hate good things.
But as a very big fan, watching another of my favorite female artiste taken away, by the cold hands of marriage, gave me cold shivers.
Adekunle Gold did this thing to me, when he filled Simi's head with love, coveted what was meant for the general public, into his house.
Since then, we stopped having the best of Simi..
Simi started singing to impress and garned streams from the Kosoko family, not her fans anymore.

This is exactly what this one with large beards and big chest is almost about to execute now..

No wonder! the Mercy that was releasing songs every two weeks, has gone 6 months without a single one.
And here was I, thinking she was preparing an album, not knowing that "Man of large beards" has taken a large part of mercy's heart.
Not knowing, that "Man of huge chest" is the hugest reason why she lost concentration.

The bible texts that used to fill her hearts with inspirations, has now been replaced with texts and whatsapp messages from this guy.
The berets she used to wear, are all probably under the 5th cushion in her parlour.

This man has made her lose concentration.
See the way she was even hugging him, as if he is the chief corner stone.
My God! My God!!

Dear diary, I will only congratulate her fully, when she releases another album so powerful as the "SATISFIED" album, but for now make she manage the little "congrats" I tell am for instagram.

Your anxiety would have been deemed healthy if your weren't a man. Respect her choice regardless of your desires for her new albums. And none of the ladies your mentioned were destined to forever remain public property.

She has served and given some of her best years singing to her CREATOR (not to you) and she believes the next stage of her life is building a family with that young, handsome bloke. She should get your FULL support and understanding.

thorpido:
Is that so?A man should run into debts or even do illegal things when he has a wife who works?

He doesn't have to DO illegal things.

Those are fundamentals that a man ought to be able to provide by himself.

And should the wife work, well good for them both. But it's entirely up to her to decide if she wants to assist.

A man, a family one at that, MUST not fail to shelter, feed and clothe his family, and yes, pay for his child(ren)'s education. But should he encounter some difficulties, he should look for funds or assistance elsewhere, but not seek it from his wife.

EvilNeedle:
Simp

May your days be long!

Gentleman900000:
.!

One has to be careful when making input on marital issues. This is an institution as sacred and as private as can be, more than any other human institution.

However, when issues suggestive of unfaithfulness or adultery creep up, then it is only a matter of obligation that one lends an advice.

On the strength of this resolve, I'll make bold to tell you that you need to keep a closer watch on your wife. She has shown appetite for extramarital social engagements that open doors to adultery. She has preferred the company of another man in a private/romantic capacity over you. Her ex wouldn't ask her to "create time" if she didn't encourage small, suggestive talks with this man who's supposed to belong in the thrash can of her history.

I'm afraid, your "wife" has shown signs of irresponsibility and untrustworthiness. And you should sit up. Not being "romantic enough" is no excuse for her behaviour. While you must try to rekindle your romantic overtures in your relationship, the lack of it does not make a morally healthy woman dance to drums of infidelity. Women unlike men, build infidelity with emotional involvement and time spent together with their cheating partner. In other words, theirs is calculated and deliberate. In pure but harsher term, it's UNFORGIVABLE.

Dear untrusting ex-wife, you've lost him certainly for good. You don't give a husband of 20 years a golden and legitimate opportunity to a new puna and he won't grab it with both hands.

But on the backdrop, I think women in general should worry. Just like the "me too movement " lost its steam and credibility to some warped women with insincere intent who hijacked the process, the weaponization of womanhood by some disgruntled shedevils is casting dent on the credibility of rape cases.

The man ought to be taught some bitter lessons no matter what his reason or provocation might be. You don't bring violence to an infant for whatever reason.

However, domestic violence is on the rise on a global scale. Covid and economic meltdown are the two driving factors. We may want to pretend this limited to Nigerian men alone.

Prettygirl200:
Eheheeen naaaa am I lying Are some men not wicked Especially igbos with their ritual killings everytime

I see you got yourself a fairly new handle. The previous one needed discarding obviously because it carried the scars of your behavioural flaws.

Unfortunately, your in-person, the real you doesn't have such opportunity despite how desperately you need it.

Officialgarri:
As much as this is a big loss to Russia, especially having a tag of the largest warship to be sunk since the WW2, it will make no much difference to the onslaught going on in Ukraine as we speak.

The moskva is an old ship that has been under debate to be scrapped since 5 years ago.
Infact, it hasn't fired a single shot since the start of this war.

According to the Institute for the Study of War (IOW) the Moskva’s loss – regardless of the cause – was a “major propaganda victory for Ukraine”.

In contrast, it was likely to undermine Russian morale.
Whereas, in military terms, however, the loss might not be so significant.

It was an old ship that has undergone several recent reworks. And its significance was huge as it was the flagship of the entire black sea fleet. It also served as a command and control centre for the entire black sea fleet. Its loss, those replaceable is huge and Moscow has reacted angrily by increased military strikes including issuing threats to the West. The loss of the Moskva can't be overemphasized.

placeofallure:
Family nuances.

Every marriage with its peculiarities. All kinds of abuses physical, emotional, verbal and the rest of them boils down to our inability to properly communicate in the house. Communication isn't just opening and closing your mouth.

There'll always be misgivings committed by either of the partners. Now if your spouse does something bad, address that issue, ONLY that issue, proffer solution if you can. It ends there. Don't bring the history of how his uncle was like that, or reminding her about how all her sisters are divorced ....how he did the same thing last century and blablabla... Women are more guilty here. That is what annoys the man and if he lacks self control, your guess is as good as mine.

Many men in my opinion are immature. You need to nurture them the way you would your 5-year old. If women understand this, there'll be peace.

That's not an excuse to misbehave notwithstanding. If you are not up to it as a man, don't marry. A man should be able to make informed choices that is best for his family. These failings or shortcomings are the things that infuriate a woman. And if she has an unbridled tongue, reeling begins. Plus men have this ego problem. It's not a taboo to see a wife more sensible than the husband. Men, know this and know wisdom. As a man, you could borrow sense if yours is inadequate. It doesn't make you less of a man. You're to complement each other. Marriage is not a competing ground.

God save our marriages.

With a mentality as that as you expressed, as highlighted, you definitely need help.

Sayishalom:
I am aware of a married man who is clearly cheating on his wife with a lady I know well. It disturbs me a lot cause I have feelings for the lady in question. Should I report to his wife or keep mute? I don't like women to be disrespected like this. The same lady doesn't care whether I am aware or not. Help a man with answers.

Thunder fire your Hypocrisy. "You don't like women to be disrespected like this" or the object of your love interest prefers a married man over your gameless ass.

Woman wrapper.

BRATISLAVA:
False bravado, as usual. Stale.

More fantasy and lies. You're digging yourself deeper in your self-made pit and you will realize it too late.

Expecting more hollow epistles and pained emojis from you. Predictably dry. The exact same comebacks of last time—your weekends in which you fantasize yourself a beast. Blah blah.

Go and heal. Get help.

Tell me what's as stale as your claim to not read the scathing rebuttal that rendered your emotional defences comatose.

Or as repetitive as the undies you recycle once in a week.

Tell me what's as dumb and harmless as your effort at clapbacks.

You can't touch me. Your arrows are several hundreds of km short of their target.

But I'm that consequences of your iniquities; the judgment that was delayed but now has come! Each word of mine is a measurement of your transgressions, and inescapably they've found their way like the air into your lungs.

Nairaland as before for you is OVER!

BRATISLAVA:
Didn't really read that. I know it must be foolishness.

You are still abusing and insulting yourself publicly, displaying the extent of your degeneration to all, still crawling after me from thread to thread and post to post.

All because of a post that was not directed at you months ago. On your flimsy, crazy grounds that don't make sense. You are digging yourself into a very tight pit, my dear. Retrace your steps.

Your epistles change nothing; if anything they apply to you. You post a lot of lies that are nothing. You are dull, repetitive and uninspiring—as always. Wake up. Get help.

Go and heal. Or you will continue to hurt yourself. Badly.

You didn't read something you invested over a thousand words in reply to, C'mon! You can do better than that dumb lie. And why, why is that the best of expletives always ended up in claims of not being read by you female snakes?

This cheap dumb lie was what made your endless list of boyfriends leave you. You just couldn't cover your cheating tracks and they soon found out you were a public toilet and a sperm dump. Even in the twilight of your market value, you still haven't changed. Are you destined for the grave dick-less? I can hardly see a man finding a partner in a lying, deceptive and bitter soul in the mould of a woman.

We're not intellectual peers to begin with, neither can your broken frame accommodate my literal proficiency but your pride and stupidity stirred you to go into this contest with me.

The best you could do in hurting me is giving me a few love scratch on my back in response to my severe pounding

Let the dice roll on. It's the weekend. (MY) MONSTERS (ARE REAL) by Shinedown blasts in my ears, my blend of Stout and Farm Fresh yoghurt tonic trickle down my lungs while you serve as amusement.